Part 2: The Land of the Pipsqueaks
AN: Guess what I still don't own? Inuyasha and The Wizard of Oz!! Are you surprised? You shouldn't be. Sillies.
(Looks nervous) Um, Hiraku? Yeah, I'm really sorry if it seems like I'm bashing Kikyo, but this is just how the overall idea of this came to me. I will admit that I really don't like her, but I would kind of feel bad posting something bashing her, especially because there's a character that I like on another show that tends to get that treatment. I've always liked the character she's playing in this, anyway. Frankly, I'm kind of trying to poke fun at everything in this, and if what I'm doing to Kikyo stands out to you in a negative way, I'm very sorry. I'm just using both stories to crack jokes at the other, but that's how parodies work, you know?
I'm just doing this as I feel like it. So, there may be a few things I leave out or something, but that's just how I'm writing it, okay? Okay! Oh, and I might have an Inuyasha spoiler or two (I read the manga online, and the site is like four days behind Japan, if that tells you anything). So don't get mad if in my insanity, I accidently ruin something for you!
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"Sango?!" Kagura called as the wind and rain whipped around her.
"Sango, where are you?!"
"I saw her running off," Miroku confessed. "I didn't know what was going on, so I didn't try to stop her."
"Well, we can't worry about that now," Inuyasha growled. "We need to figure out where she is."
"Oh no!!!!!!" Shippo exclaimed, running toward them.
"What's wrong now?"
"It's a twister!" Shippo replied in fear. "It's heading right toward us! We need to take shelter now!"
"You mean a tornado?" Inuyasha said unenthusiastically.
"He's right," Kagura said, looking off in the distance. "Come on, let's go!"
They ran to doors set in the ground and started going inside.
"Wait a minute, what about Sango?" Miroku asked, looking around the storm ridden landscape.
"We don't have time for that!" Inuyasha exclaimed.
"Yeah, and anyway, I really don't care," Kagura said, pulling Miroku in and shutting the doors.
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"Aunt Kagura?!" Sango exclaimed. "Where are you?! I'm back!!!"
She looked around at the empty farm, the rain stinging her face and the tornado coming ever closer. She ran over to the cellar and tried to open the doors.
"Hey, let us in!" she cried, still holding Kilala with one hand.
"Nope, too late!" Kagura answered from behind the doors.
"Oh, come on! Let her in!" three other voices said.
"No!!!"
"Fine!" Sango replied angrily. "See if I care? I hope the twister hits you guys and totally misses the house, where I'll be!!!"
She stomped inside and closed the door as well as she could. Windows were beginning to break from the changes in pressure, and she took Kilala back into her bedroom.
"I hope we'll be safe here," she mumbled, looking out the window to see if she could still see the tornado.
Suddenly, the glass broke, and a piece of wood from the edges hit her on the head and she remembered nothing more.
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Sango awoke suddenly and looked around. Her head didn't hurt for some reason, although the wind was still howling outside. She went to the window and looked outside, Kilala once again in her arms.
However, outside was no more. All she saw was a whirling vortex of debris. "We must be inside the tornado," she said. "Wow, what are the odds?"
The house was now obviously spinning around, and she fell backwards onto the bed as the house started to fall down. She held onto Kilala tightly as the speed increased and they hit the ground with a thud.
She stood up and headed to the outside door. "It's a miracle that we survived," Sango said, opening the door and looking at the land in shock.
Everything was in bright, vivid color. Birds were singing, plants were growing, and the air was clean and fresh. Sango stepped outside, incredibly surprised. She looked at all of the strange buildings and wildlife in awe.
"Kilala," she mumbled, "I have a feeling we're not in Kansas anymore."
Just then, she noticed an arrow wrapped in pink light shooting toward her. She was too scared to move away, although Kilala struggled to get free. However, the arrow hit the ground in front of her, and the light spread out in a strange blast.
Standing where the arrow had been was a young woman in a long sleeved white shirt with a green collar and a red tie with a matching green miniskirt. She looked kind of flustered. "Wow, that was a weird way to travel," she muttered, making sure she was standing on the ground.
"Who are you?" Sango asked, slowly beginning to back away.
"Oh, right!" the girl exclaimed. "I'm supposed to ask you if you're a good miko or a bad miko!"
"What?"
"Are you a good miko or a bad miko?"
"I'm sorry, but I'm not a miko at all. I'm just a normal girl from Kansas."
"Where's that?"
"You know, I'm actually used to that question..."
"Well, I was just asking you, because the Pipsqueaks wanted to know what kind of girl killed the Wicked Miko of the East."
"I did what?!" Sango exclaimed, looking back toward the house and seeing a pair of legs sticking out from underneath it. "Oh no!!! I'm so sorry!"
"No, no! It's fine! I just said she was wicked, didn't I? Only a very powerful miko could have killed her off, so the Pipsqueaks just wanted to know if you were a good one or a bad one."
"I all ready said that I'm not a miko! My name's Sango! Aren't mikos really freaky and talk to spirits and stuff?"
"Um," the lady replied, "I'm a miko."
"That makes sense," Sango said after a moment, Kilala finally getting free of her grasp and going over to smell the strange flowers.
"I am Kagome, the Good Miko of the North," she continued, ignoring her comment. "And you have just done us all a great favor by destroying Tsubaki, the Wicked Miko of the East!"
"But if you're a miko, why didn't you just take care of her?" Sango asked.
"I have to keep up the whole "Good" image. Since you're new, you could get away with saying you're good even though you killed her, but the Pipsqueaks could never look at me the same way again if I had done it."
"Who are the Pipsqueaks?"
"Oh!" Kagome exclaimed, realizing what she hadn't said. "The Pipsqueaks are the people who inhabit this land. They're very excitable, but I don't know where they went off to.
Come on, get out here, don't be a slowpoke!
It's thanks to this girl that Tsubaki has croaked!"
Suddenly, six very short people came walking toward them.
"There they are!" Kagome said happily.
"There are only six?" Sango commented. "This city is huge!"
"Yeah, well, they don't have much to do, so they just build things."
By this point, they had reached the two of them, mostly looking very excited. "Did you kill the miko?" one asked.
"Yes, I did. I'm very sorry..."
"YIPEEE!!!!" they all exclaimed, and four of them started dancing around each other. Sango stepped away, looking very scared, and Kilala leapt back up into her arms.
"Woo hoo, the miko's dead!
Which miko? The bad miko!
Woo hoo, the wicked miko's dead!"
"They're celebrating because somebody died?" Sango said, looking very disturbed.
"Yeah, well she was pretty bad," Kagome replied.
Just then, the smallest one hopped up to her. "Hello," he said happily. "I'm Myoga, the leader of the Pipsqueaks. We're just going to have our expert check out the miko to make sure she's kicked the bucket!"
Just then, one of the others came walking, or it seemed more like floating, back to the others. He was one of the two that really wasn't showing any emotion at all during this whole thing.
"What's the word, Hakudoushi?" Myoga asked.
"Yep, she's dead." he said.
"You mean like you are now?" Kagome said with a slight laugh.
"Shut up."
The rest of the Pipsqueaks (except for the other that didn't show much emotion) leapt into the air in excitement.
"Let the joyous news be spread, the wicked old miko at last is dead!" Kagome exclaimed.
"Woo hoo, the miko's..."
"Please don't sing like that anymore," Sango interrupted, looking very uncomfortable.
Suddenly the Pipsqueaks lined up and started talking to her. "I am Rin!" one excited girl said. "I am the representative of the Candy Sector of Pipsqueak Town! Here, have a mint!"
She placed a small dinner mint in Sango's hand. "Gee, thanks," she said very unenthusiastically.
"I'm Sota," the first one to ever speak said. "I don't do anything around here! Except build stuff."
"I'm Kanna," the other that didn't show any emotion mentioned before falling silent.
"And I'm Jaken," the last said. "I can finally leave this place and find..."
"No you can't!" Myoga exclaimed. "We Pipsqueaks have to stick together!"
Jaken grumbled for a moment.
"So, let's get back to..." Myoga began, but was suddenly interrupted by an explosion of red light and smoke. The Pipsqueaks all ran for cover, while Kagome, Sango, and Kilala stood staring at the source of the blast.
Another young woman stood there, this one wearing a white top, red pants, and long, black hair in a ponytail, although two strands were mostly out of it. She looked around the village wearing a scowl until she saw the Wicked Miko of the East's legs sticking out from under the house.
"Who killed Tsubaki?!" she exclaimed. "I'm the only person allowed to kill around here! And I clearly stated last time that she was next on my list! Who did this?!"
"W-who is that?" Sango whispered to Kagome.
"Oh, that's the Wicked Miko of the West," she answered. "She's ten time more bi-"
"Well, look at this!" the Wicked Miko of the West interrupted. "It's goody-goody Kagome of the North! And who's this stupid looking creature beside you?"
"Kilala is not stupid!" Sango exclaimed.
"Um, I think she was talking about you, Sango," Kagome said.
"Huh?!"
"You killed her, didn't you?!" the miko exclaimed, walking straight up to Sango. "The first rule you need to know about being here is that what I say goes, and I said that I got to kill Tsubaki! How dare you take my glory! I ought to kill you instead..."
"Hey, why did you want to kill her in the first place?" Kagome interrupted, with a strange smile on her face.
"I don't know, it sounded like fun," the Wicked Miko of the West replied.
"Wasn't there anything else you wanted?"
"Oh yes! The Sacred Jewel she always wore! I could become all powerful with that..."
They all looked over at the corpse of the Wicked Miko of the East, only to watch it disintegrate in front of their eyes.
"...Yuck," Sango said, watching the ashes blow away.
"Where's the jewel!!!" the Wicked Miko of the West exclaimed. "It should have sustained her body!"
"It's over here," Kagome said, pointing to Sango's neck and revealing that she was wearing a small pink sphere around her neck.
Sango stared at her in awe. "How'd you do that?"
"Give that to me!" the Wicked Miko exclaimed, running over and trying to grab the jewel. However, she was thrown back by a strange force field.
"Here it is, and here it will stay," Kagome commented.
"You stupid little..." she grumbled while getting back to her feet. "I may not have gotten what I wanted this time but someday..." She made her way back toward Sango and glared at her with utter hatred.
"...I'll get you, my pretty, and you're little... whatever that is, too!"
With that, she vanished in an aura of red light, laughing evilly. The Pipsqueaks slowly came out of their hiding places.
"So, what's the Miko of the South like?" Sango said, looking very worried.
"Oh, she's good, too," Kagome replied. "But, she's busy with seven warriors trying to summon a god." With that she started laughing.
"Get it?"
"Get what?"
"The joke!"
"What joke?"
"Fushigi Yugi?"
"Huh?"
"Never mind," Kagome said, sighing from the failure at her attempt to be funny. "So, what are you going to do now?"
"I don't know," Sango replied. "I suppose I should try to get back home, even though our house is gone, and nobody likes me, and everything's in black and white..."
"Well," Kagome interrupted, "the only way to get out of this place is to visit the Youkai in Sapphire Town."
"The what?"
"The Youkai! He's a very powerful and mysterious person. He should be able to help you leave Oz."
"Is that were I am?"
"Yeah, didn't I tell you that?" Kagome replied.
"No," Sango answered.
"Oh, well, you should go see the Youkai in Sapphire Town, anyway."
"And how do I get to Sapphire Town?"
"That's simple!" Kagome said with a laugh. "Just follow the Green Stone Path!"
"Follow the Green Stone Path?"
"Yes, follow the Green Stone Path!" Kagome repeated. The Pipsqueaks ran up around her.
"Follow the Green Stone Path!
Follow the Green Stone Path!
Follow, follow, follow, follow..."
"I get the point!" Sango exclaimed. "You guys don't have to sing it to me!"
"Well, you'd better get going," Kagome said, pushing her in the direction of the road. "Good luck! See you around!"
"Goodbye!" the Pipsqueaks squealed.
"Bye," Sango replied, pulling Kilala closer to her and walking briskly away. As she went she hear the Pipsqueaks once again singing behind her.
"You're off to see the Youkai,
The wonderful Youkai of Oz!
We hear he is a really good Youkai,
If ever a Youkai there was!
If ever, oh ever a Youkai there was,
The Youkai of Oz is one because Because, because, because, because, because!
Because of the mysterious things he does!
You're off to see the Youkai,
The wonderful Youkai of Oz!"
"I really wish they'd quit stating the obvious," Sango said as she and Kilala continued on down the Green Stone Path.
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AN: Okay, there's the next part! Please review and let me know what you think, and I'll get part three up, soon! It'll start getting better, trust me, cause I'm a little leery about it right now, to tell you the truth. Please review!!!