Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, in fact, I believe Harry Potter might own me, that is how obsessed I am. Oh yeah, I don't own any of the other characters, places, or things, that are familiar to you.

A/N:

The letter is kind of long (okay, maybe very long,) SB might seem out of character (Sirius is serious), but hey, he had a lot to say & do we really know what he is like, we've only see him interact w/ HP on short visits & from stories about the Marauders.

Hopefully the letter will be shocking...bold printing is HP's feelings/thoughts regarding the letter.

Thanks Reviewers!!!!

J Black, (my first reviewer), Thank you so much...was so glad when I noticed that someone reviewed-and within hours after story was posted. This is for you...

Anna Taure: Thanks. I did interview Harry...ok maybe not, but since I am so emotional (esp if I don't have chocolate near me), I just put all those emotions into HP.

Pure Black & Makalani Astral: Thanks for the reviews. Here's the letter.

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Chapter 2 the letter

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Dear Harry,

This is the 3rd time I had to write this letter. You would think it would've gotten easier by now, that I would know everything I needed to say and how to say it, but I don't so forgive a man his ramblings.

The first time I wrote this letter it was just after your parents died. At the time, you were only 1 and had no idea who I was, you wouldn't remember the time I placed you in Lily's arms, of how I was standing besides James when I was appointed your godfather. I was a stranger to you then & was thinking that I was destined to stay a stranger, since I was sentenced to life in Azkaban.

The 2nd time was just after your 3rd year of school. By then, we had met each other & even if we didn't know each other well, I knew that the previous letter, written to a 1 year old child who didn't know me, wouldn't suffice. So I wrote the letter again, this time from the perspective of a distant uncle.

This time, I am writing the letter after meeting & corresponding with you for almost 2 years. In that time, we have gotten to know and care about each other. This time, I write it as your Godfather, a stand-in father figure who cares deeply for you and wants to be a part of your life.

I hope that as we get closer, that this letter becomes unnecessary and that when you need to know this information, that I will be there in person to share it with you. However, I feel that that isn't going to happen. The war is coming, and unfortunately, there will be casualties. While I hope both of us survive, I know that I will gladly give my life to save yours. Things are happening and I feel a strong desire to write this letter once again, partly because of how our relationship has changed and partly due to other events that I fear will happen after this letter is written. While I am not a seer like Trelawney,

Harry rolls his eyes to the ceiling, snorting at this line before he continues reading

I have a feeling that I will soon not be able to be there for you as I have been.

At this, Harry quickly glances over the letter to see if it was dated, there, on the bottom, beneath Sirius's signature was the date-June 1, 1996, just weeks before the events at the Ministry of Magic-Harry shivered at the thought that Sirius knew what the future held.

I know I wasn't always there for you as you needed or wanted me to be. I wish that I could be there for you now. For I know that if you are reading this, then I am no longer of this world. I Just want you to know that you were like a son to me. I loved having you in my home & in my life. Although at times, I admit it was good to have my friend's son with me. Someone I could reminisce with, who wanted to hear about James and the Marauders. I always knew who you were. Contrary to popular belief, I know that you weren't James. You weren't just James' son. You are Harry, a bright, often mischievous boy (with a talent for finding trouble) with a great capacity for caring.

I ask that you continue to love and care. You have lost a lot in this life and I hope that you don't distance yourself from your friends, physically or emotionally. I am not asking you not to be sad, grieve for me and remember me. But most of all remember that you are still alive. That people do love and care for you and they need you to love them in return. Don't pull back from life, don't focus on the negative things in this world, find the beauty & magnificence in life. Although our time together was brief, I am glad that you welcomed me into you life, others deserve that same opportunity.

Now for the reason for this letter. The reason why I was able to separate who you were from James was simple. I am the only one who knows who you are. Lily & James loved you. They had wanted a child desperately since the beginning of their marriage. A child to love and care for. A symbol of their love & the hope they had that their child's world would be better than the world they lived in, a world that was plagued with images of war.

In November of 1979, Lily had told their friends & family that she was pregnant. She had waited until she was well into the 2nd trimester of the pregnancy, when the pregnancy would become noticeable and since it was less likely that something would go wrong. Being raised by muggles, she was superstitious about mentioning her pregnancy and the unborn child. Since most people believed she had just found out about the pregnancy, they expected a baby born mid-summer of 1980. In actuality, that baby would've been born in April of 1980.

Harry stops reading this line and runs his hand through is already messed up hair, trying to figure out what this meant. Was his birthday really in the spring? Did that mean that he wasn't the child mentioned in the prophesy? Harry figures he could ask Dumbledore these questions later and continues to read.

In April of 1980, Lily gave birth to a baby girl, that they named Jasmyn. Although Lily was able to carry the child to term, there were complications with the birth. Lily was fine, but would most likely be unable to have another child. Jasmyn, however, was not doing well. Due to the complications during birth, Jasmyn didn't survive. Lily & James were both devastated. Lily started thinking, that maybe it wasn't meant to be. Maybe the future world that they longed for, one filled with peace & love, didn't exist. Maybe Voldemort wouldn't be stopped. For they were no longer in London, evading Voldemort at this point, since it was believed that Voldemort was looking for them, and working for the order. I was the only one of "our group" who knew. Lily didn't want anyone to know, partly because she didn't know how to handle the feelings of sympathy & pity and part because she thought things in the world were difficult enough, without adding to people's burdens. James & I couldn't convince her sharing this information wouldn't be burden to others and that it could help her if she talked about it, but Lily was steadfast (Gryffindor stubbornness, I called it), so James & I respected her wishes for the time being. We were up in Scandinavia at this time (in fact, we left right after Lily had shared the news about her pregnancy), on a mission for the order, trying to get help from wizards in other countries during this war. James & I figured we had time before we returned to London to persuade Lily to change her mind. After a few more months, it didn't matter as much. Communication between us & the order was practically non-existent, as Voldemort's powers & influence increased. It was too dangerous to use owls, and the floo network was being monitored as well.

About 6 months later, I was with the Swedish Minister of Magic in his office in Stockholm. One of the witches I had gotten to know well during this time came running into his office, holding an infant child of about 3 months. Apparently, the infant's mother was dead. For some reason, the women's family did not want the responsibility of caring for the child and no one knew who the father was, for the child's mother did not list that information on the birth certificate. Unfortunately, this child was not the first to be left orphaned due to the war. By this time, Hospitals & orphanages were filled with children without homes. Many wizarding families have already taken in 2-3 additional children, but money was tight, those who could afford to look after an additional child not their own, were already doing so. I sat there for a moment wondering how I could help. I immediately thought of Lily & James. I quickly told them about my best friend and his wife and their desire and despair over having a child. It was decided that if they wanted, they could adopt this child.

I was so excited to talk to Lily & James, but so nervous as well. How did they feel about adoption? I did not even know if they had ever thought about it. Maybe I shouldn't bring it up. Maybe I should just forget about it. Who was I to try to 'plan' their lives? No, I decided, I will mention it, for the child's sake, if they are open to it, how could I not mention it? Slowly I walked to where I knew Lily & James were staying, thinking about how I should approach this topic.

After telling Lily & James about the child (a boy, about 3 months old, in good health), I looked at their faces. Both sat there stunned. Apparently neither one had thought of the possibility of adoption. I was just thinking that I might have made a mistake bringing this up to them. Maybe it was too soon after Jasmyn. Then I looked at Lily again. She had tears streaming down her cheeks. She was whispering about not even thinking about all the children that would be left without homes or families. All those children without someone to love and care for them, as a result of this war. She jumped up and started pulling James and I towards the door, she couldn't wait to get to the ministry.

Once at the ministry, I introduced James & Lily to the Swedish Minister. As they started talking, I went into the office next to them to wait with the minister's assistant and the child. About half an hour later, the child and I were called into the minister's office. Carrying the child, I stepped into the office and looked at Lily's beaming face. After a nod from the minister I walked over to Lily and placed the small child in her waiting arms. I then stood next to James as the adoption was completed, and I was named godfather to Harry James Potter.

At this point of the letter, Harry had trouble breathing. He had to read that last line over and over again before it sunk in. He was adopted. The person he thought he was didn't really exist. Who was he? He knew his birth mother was dead, but he had no clues as to who his father was. Did his father even know that he existed? And what about his mother's family, why didn't they want to care for him? When was his birthday? How did this affect the prophecy? Taking a few deep breaths, he continued to read Sirius's letter.

I can imagine all the thoughts and feelings that are running across your mind right now. When you are ready to learn more about the truth, the Marauders will be there to help you, but for now, let me continue telling you about Lily & James.

Right before Christmas, the four of us returned to London. At this point in time, James and Lily hadn't thought how, when or even if they would explain that you were adopted. Since most of their friends and families knew that Lily was pregnant when we left, they were not surprised to see the 3 1/2 month old child. Lily and James were devoted parents. They loved you more than anything else in this world. You brought the sparkle back into Lily's eyes that had been missing since Jasmyn died. There was nothing the two of them wouldn't give or do for you. In the spring of 1981, it became clear that Voldemort was continuing to seek out your parents. This time though, with more determination than before. Previously, he was searching for them because they were a powerful couple who were working against him & thwarting his plans. Now, Voldemort was obsessed with them. It was decided that they should hide under the Fidelus charm. They had asked me to be their secret keeper. As you know, I persuaded them to use Peter instead (something that I will always regret), not only because everyone would expect it to be me, but because I already knew too many of their secrets.

Harry, the year they spent with you was the happiest I had ever seen them. You filled a void in their life and provided them with hope for the future. They couldn't have loved you more if you were their natural-born son. I mentioned previously that there was nothing the two of them wouldn't give or do for you, a fact that you well know. They would not regret losing their lives trying to save yours. You were their son, and they loved you. Not once did they ever regret the decision to adopt you.

After Lily & James died and I was sent to Azkaban, I decided to write this information in a letter (that was the 1st letter I composed). I couldn't let you live your whole life without the chance for you to know the truth. Lily & James had always planned on telling you someday, especially since they hoped to adopt more children that were left behind due to the war. Since they were no longer able to tell you, I felt that I, as your godfather, now had that responsibility, especially since I was the only one left who knew about it.

I have not mentioned the contents of this letter to anyone. It is up to you to decide who to tell and when. Remember, if you decide to discover more information about your birth family, the Marauders will always be there for you.

Love,
Sirius

June 1, 1996

P.S. In case you are wondering, your birthday is July 31. That information we were able to get from your original birth certificate.

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End Chapter 2

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This is my first fanfic, so any feedback is appreciated. Chapters too long? Too short? I know that I have some trouble with the tenses (past, present, future), but I try.

9/23/2004