Hey I've gotten a few really nice reviews, thank you!

KosMos rox-9, Thanks, I'm a fan of all your stories! You're a Xenosaga humor genius!

FFfangirl: Thank you also, (I love Monty Python...it might have been the style i was going for. Besides...put too much detail or description in a humor story and you kill it)

AllyKat722: Heh heh heh, I killed Tony! ::sticks out tongue and runs:: I am glad you like the story though...

Okaaay, on with my second favorite chapter to this story. (My favorite being the chapter that comes after this)

Chapter Three: Cosplaying, not crossdressing.

It hadn't occured to any of them before that they were now stuck there. There? Where is there you may ask. I don't know, they just were...there. And wherever 'there' was, they were stuck. Stuck for lack of a captian (killed by chaos), lack of navigator (killed by Tony), and lack of well, piolet! (Killed by Kevin). I suppose Allen could navigate and KOS MOS could take controlls, but remember, Allen has passed out for story purposes.

So the remaining people decide to amuse themselves until Allen wakes up. How?

The Forbidden Technology!

"Can we PLEASE do something else now?" asked a very bored chaos.

Laura shrugged. "What did you have in mind?"

"We could play Dance Dance Revolution!" All waited for a gasp, but seeings how the only original cast member alive and coherent was chaos, there wasn't one. (No, Shion doesn't count...she's NEVER coherent)

"Fine with me!" Laura jumped up and pulled out the DDR matt of doom. Kayla however, wasn't very convinced. She eyed the dead, vaporized or passed our bodies on the floor. Now how on ear...I mean, 'Lost Jerusalem', were they supposed to play with all this clutter on the floor?

"Don't ya think it's a little messy in here? Where would we put the matt?" She kicked Tony. "I know I'm not cleaning this up!" She grinned as another one of those figurative lightbulbs appeared over her head. "Hey, KOS MOS..."

"I am NOT happy to be of service"

"Aww...c'mon KOS MOS!"

"There is a 98.99999 chance that if you ask this of me again, you will join the mess." KOS MOS then left the room. Kayla stood there, like she was about to get shot. Chances are she would have gotten shot. Obviously KOS MOS demonstrated when she shot Virgil that she had no qualms about shooting people. But that was Virgil, and he deserved it.

"Heeey! I have an idea! I'll be right back!" Laura dissapeared into the next room.

"Where did she go?" chaos inquired, only to answered by a loud rumble in the next room.

Now, how laura was able to get one of those machines they use to clean ice with at hockey games is beyond me. Nobody knew where it came from, or even how she managed to get it through the door. Nevertheless, it was there, and as long as chaos got to play his DDR, I'm not thinking he really cares.

Now this is the genius time Jr chooses to join our little party. He obviously must have found where 'there' is, because, well...he's here. Well not, 'here', he was 'there'. However he found them, he obviously was not able to produce an explanation for the ice cleaner either. By the time he decided that even though he shouldn't he would ask, Laura had sucessfully cleaned the floor and piled the 'dirt' behind the small couch that didn't really hide much.

"What the...." Jr thought better than to ask now.

"Problem solved!" Laura beamed triumphantly.

chaos looked about as happy as they've ever seen him. In fact, he almost had a facial expression! "We're going to play Dance Dance Revolution, Jr. Would you like to play with us?"

Jr's face lit up with a challenging grin. "hahaha! I'll own you all!!!"

Now why didn't Jr fear the forbidden technology? The answer was quite simple actually. After Jr, in all his psycopathic tendencies, had tired of playing with the Zohar emulators, Gaignun had bought him his own DDR set. Now how do a couple of URTVs get a hold of a copy of a twenty-first century game? Nobody knows. It's one of those mysteries like how laura got the ice cleaner in through the door. Rumor has it though that he ordered it from Albedo, who has an extensive marketing project for the game on the UMN network. ( Who knew Albedo was a businessman?)

"JR!!!!" Kayla all of the sudden freaked out for no reason.

"What?!"

"What had we talked about?" she pointed to the guns he carried around with him.

"Oh yea! no guns in the house! Sorry."

She grabbed the guns and tossed them out the window and points to Kevin, who's head is sticking out from under the couch. "THAT is what happens when we let guns in the house!"

"And we learned that Allen has a surprisingly good aim." Laura added.

" No he doesn't."

"Why do you say that?"

"...he missed Shion."

Of course, at the mention of her name her head perks up. "Is someone talking about me? Did someone say something? Is KOS MOS okay?"

No one will ever know what motivated chaos to do something like this. Oh, heck, yes we do. She was a complete moron. Draw your own conclusions from that. Either way, in about 3.446 seconds (By KOS MOS's watch) 'Shion' was a pile of something on the floor. Yes, it turns out that chaos' gnosis disintigration touch works on Shion too! Now, what does that say about her to begin with?

"Good job, chaos. You went and killed the main character!" Jr. yelled, very loudly I might add.

"So?"

"So?! This game can't continue without a main character!"

Laura was already standing on the DDR matt. She pointed to it impatiently. "THIS game can!"

Kayla grinned. It was a grin that was associated with one of those infamous figurative lightbulbs. "Well, we could always have Laura dress up as Shion!" She handed her a Vector uniform and a pair of glasses.

"Don't even go there..."

"Aww, c'mon, it might be fun! Why not?"

"Because if Allen starts hitting on me...heads WILL roll..."

"But you get to play with the red weapon thingy!"

"OKAY! But don't forget to drug Allen!"

"Not a problem. heh heh heh...." Jr rubbed his hands together deviously.

Kayla pulled a white dress, a cross necklace, and a blonde wig out of nowhere. (No, not Kevin's refrigerator this time)

"I get to play too! I want to be... Nephilim!" She ran off to the bathroom where she changed as fast as any girl could manage.

So Laura was now Shion, and Kayla was now Nephilim. It was kinda like crossdressing...except not, because neither of them were clad in the garb of the opposite sex. So in reality it ws more like cosplaying.... Don't worry though, the crossdressing will come in time.

Chaos was giving them both menacing looks. (Yes, imagine chaos giving menacing looks. Can you do it? Neither can I...)

"What's your problem?" asked Jr.

"IM GOING TO DISINTIGRATE YOU ALL IF I DON'T GET TO PLAY NOW!!!!"

Poor chaos was falling under the controll of the Forbidden Technology.

Pity.

Good news for Shion fans. I lied, the shion abuse will stop now....for a little while. Tune in next time for Jr's adventure in crossdressing! I know you'll all love it.