Chris: Glad to see so many people like the sequel. But now, we must reserve a couple of seconds for the mourning of Farina's Diary, which was deleted for having violence above the rating. But anyway, reader reviews and then story time.

Nightmare: Heh, glad you like it. Yeah, Elibe-Mart is cool.

The Yeoman: Nope, I don't watch South Park. Don't have cable.

Mallow-chan: Ah…Ninian dies after the level where you get Eliwood's (or Hector's) legendary weapon. Yeah.

Lack Thereof: Thanks for the compliments. And I hope you continue to like it.

K-Gforever: Yeah, dance fights are funny. Glad you like the fic.

Kiyoko-chan: Hehehe, salesmen are really, really evil. And you're right. They are like pop-ups.

Lord of swords and waffles: Thanks for the praise and…Glad you like it.

Chapter 2: The Prince, The Plot, and The Pansy

"HOLY CRAPMONKEYS, WE'RE SCREWED!" As soon as Hector's Hecklers saw the dragon looming over them, they dashed around like frightened little children. Which they were, kinda. But Hector finally managed to gather his wits and organized the whole team.

"Okay. That might be a huge-ass dragon up there, and we might be little tiny insects compared to it, but I believe we can defeat it!" He raised his fist in victory, hoping to cheer the troops. He partially succeeded. Some people were still skeptical, and then there was the fact that the dragon was leaning down to breathe fire on them all. Hector turned. "Fudge biscuits! Okay, new plan of attack! We need to hide!"

"Where?" Eliwood looked around frantically. "I can't find a place to hide!"

Hector thought for a moment. "Everyone behind Merlinus's Tent! Or…Uh…Wagon!" So every member of Hector's Hecklers decided to either hide in the wagon, behind the wagon, or under the wagon. And amazingly enough, the wagon jumped fifty feet in the air, dodging the dragonfire and leaving everyone unharmed. The dragon glared at the funny, blue wagon and tried swiping at it. The wagon flew around Dragon's Gate, dodging the swipes and settled down out of the reach of the monster.

"Merlinus?" Hector stepped out of the wagon.

"Y-Yes, milord?"

"Where in the hells did you get this wagon?" Hector shouted as he looked at it. Actually, everyone gathered around and looked at it. Since no one had seen a flying wagon before…You can understand their surprise.

"Um…Well, there was the Ilian Black Market…And then those dragons at Arcadia decided to help me…And a couple of bribes on the continent of Etruria." Merlinus ticked off the various locations where he had obtained upgrades for his wagon. "I believe that's it." He looked around and saw that everyone was staring at him. "What?"

Hector shook his head. "Nevermind. Anyway, Chris, do you have a plan to defeat this thing?"

The tactician pointed to himself. "What? Me? Against that thing? Yeah right. Against people, sure. Against a honking huge dragon that could swallow us all up in one big gulp? No." He sighed. "This is the last thing I was expecting when I joined the tactician's guild. They said, 'Oh, don't worry! You won't fight any great dragons or stupid stuff like that!' Stupid freakin' liars."

"That's just great. Now how are we going to do this?" Hector slapped his face and moaned. "Ever with our legendary weapons, I doubt we can do anything other than give it a really bad ache."

Lyn tapped her chin. "I've got no idea. Man, I just wish something would come and solve our troubles."

Just as she said that, a giant flying ship came in. Yes, a giant flying ship. And out jumped a pirate and a bunch of cats. Yes, cats. One even had a hook for a hand. But they were cats. They yelled battle cries, swarmed the dragon, and then dashed back to their ship. The army looked on as the ship fired a bunch of cannonballs at the dragon before flying away.

"That was…amusing. I think. And random too." Lyn looked at the dragon, who scratching itself. "Hmm…if my last wish came true, then….I wish for a pizza." Just like earlier, her wish came true and a giant pizza fell into her hands. "I've got an idea!" She threw the pizza into the Dragon's Gate. The dragon looked at the pizza as it was flying and followed it into the portal.

"Quickly Nils! Seal the gate!" Eliwood pointed at the young boy.

"Right!" He whipped out his flute and played a song, which closed off the portal. Hector's Hecklers cheered. Nils grinned and pocketed his flute. Then he noticed that there was a certain white-blue haired girl standing nearby. "Ninian!" At that, everyone turned and spotted the dancer. She waved to them. Everyone was dumbfounded, and Athos grunted as he saw them all.

"Like a bunch of cows! I don't see what the big idea is! My friend and I resurrected her for you whelps!" Athos grumbled again. Nobody replied and he shook his head. "Look at that! Kids show no respect! Don't even thank me for my kind gesture."

Eliwood was the first to break the silence. "ThankyougodandAthostooOMGIamsohappyandyayness!" He rushed up to Ninian wrapped the dancer in a big hug. That broke the spell of dumbfoundedness and everyone rushed to talk to Ninian and to thank Athos. Now that he had been justly thanked, Athos waved his staff to get everyone's attention. When he didn't get it, he whacked a couple of noggins. That got their attention.

"Listen you fudgefingers! Nergal is still alive, and he's leading a worldwide campaign for his Elibe-Mart stores! He's saying that he'll lower prices by 50 if people kidnap you guys and bring you to him! So you better stop him!" Athos laughed. "Of course, I think you'll all fail, but that's just me. Have fun!" The archsage warped away, leaving the army.

"Well that just blows. We'll need to counter this new threat." Lyn planted her fists on her hips. "There's an Elibe-Mart in every country here, right? Bern, Ilia, Lycia, Sacae, the Western Isles, Valor, Etruria, and Nabata, I think." Lyn shook her head. "How are we going to do this?"

Eliwood stopped hugged Ninian for a moment to reply. "We could always separate into groups." With that spoken, he and Ninian began making out.

"Get a room!"

"Ahem." Hector cleared his throat. "I think that's a good idea. Anyway, we have forty-three people and there are either stores. Plus we need to make one of our own to make some competition."

"Good idea, milord!" Merlinus raised his hands. "I would like the make the store, and have Guy, Matthew, Legault, Priscilla, and Fiora as my helpers!"

Hector scratched his hair. "Hmm…Very well. You guys got that?" He pointed to the selected people. They nodded and left with Merlinus to form their own market, which Merlinus wanted to call Merlinus's Mart. It was a very original and catchy name. Not.

Chris wrote the people on a list. "That leaves…thirty-seven. Okay, first Elibe-Mart is…Ilia. Who's going there?"

Eliwood, Farina, Kent, Sain, and Ninian raised their hands. Chris looked at them. "And why do you want to be the Ilian one?" After he got their replies, he sighed and jotted them down on his notes. Farina wanted to go there so she can sell stuff at the black market, Sain wanted to go because Farina was going, Kent wanted to go because he was afraid of what Sain would do, and Eliwood and Ninian wanted to go there to get married. Yeah…Chris was kind of afraid of the last two, but there was nothing he could do. "Good luck." He waved them off and Erk warped them all to Ilia.

"Now…The Bern one?" He looked up. Raven, Rath, Jaffar, Karel, Geitz and Bartre raised their hands. "Same question as I asked the Ilian group. Why?" The tactician wrote down their names.

"I want to kill people."

"I must test my strength!"

"I'm just really bored."

"…"

"…I want to."

"I need more blood."

Chris sighed. "Sure, why not? If Eliwood and Ninian just want to go to Ilia to make out, why can't a group of people just go to kill everyone? I feel like I'm making a huge mistake, but have fun." He nodded and Erk warped them to Bern.

"Next is…The Sacaen one. Who is it this time?" Chris looked up. Lyn, Florina, Wallace, Karla, and Vaida had their hands raised. Chris sighed and asked them the same questions. Lyn and Karla both wanted to go to Sacae because it was their home country while Wallace just wanted to go because he reasoned he couldn't get lost in the plains. Vaida wanted to go so she could argue with Wallace and Florina wanted to go to protect Lyn. He waved them off and Erk teleported them again.

"Lycia?" Chris looked up. This time, Hector, Canas, Rebecca, Wil, Lowen, Marcus, Harken, and Isadora raised their hands. Chris didn't bother asking for their reasons, since it was kind of obvious. You know, since they're from Lycia and all that…

"Next up is Nabata." Only Hawkeye raised his hand up for that and Erk warped him to Nabata.

"Etruria?" Erk, Priscilla, Pent, Louise, Serra, and Lucius raised their hands. Since, they were from Etruria, Chris bid them good luck and they all warped to Etruria.

"Western Isles?" Oswin, Dorcas, Renault, Heath, and Dart raised their hands. Chris finally asked why they wanted to go to the Western Isles.

"I hear that there's treasure in them thar hills!"

"Adventure. What else?"

"It's a place where I can finally seek solitude."

"I need to get stronger to protect my lord."

"Maybe I can get more money to help Natalie."

Renault warped them all to the Western Isles before Chris could wish them good luck. He shrugged and looked at the last location.

"Valor?" Chris looked up and sighed. He was the only one left in this whole place. "Crap suckers. How the hell am I going to do this? Theydidn't say anything about toppling an international supermarket chain in tactician school either." He folded his notes and placed them in his cloak and set out to find the Valor Elibe-Mart, which was right outside.

"Uh…How convenient." The tactician walked up to the front door of the supermarket, where he was stopped by two Morphs. "Uh, hello?"

"YOU CANNOT PASS!"

"Geez, that line is so overused. I mean, can't you just leave it to Lord of the Rings? Don't go stealing their lines." Chris shook his head. "Come up with something original."

"ALL YOUR BASE ARE BELONG TO US!"

"That's even worse. And it has bad grammar too. Give me a break. This is stupid." The tactician turned to leave. "But hey, before I leave, could you like…demolish the market or something? And then disappear like you always do when you die?"

"NO!"

"Hey, hey! The customer is always right! Now do it!" Chris pointed inside. As soon as he said that, the Valor Elibe-Mart shook, and then collapsed. "Sweet!" He jumped up joyfully. "Ha ha! All right!" Then he calmed down. "Wait…How the hell am I supposed to get off this island?" Chris looked around. "Crap." He leaned down and searched the rubble for anything that would help him leave Valor Isle.

"The tactician's guildnever said anything about being stuck on an abandoned island either."

Chris: Rejoice, for I have finished a second chapter. And after this, there will be chapters on the individual markets! Yay. Review, please!