Second Act

I have been reliably informed that sadly, like so many of our artistic greats, Bill Shakespeare is no longer with us. Even so, I wholly recommend looking up some of his works – there are some true gems to be found…

In turn, I can reliably inform that the works of J.K. Rowling and the rights to the characters and story elements from the Harry Potter series and films still do not belong to me.

When Professor Flitwick entered the library, he immediately noticed that something was different. The normally stern Madam Pince wore a bright smile and quietly hummed to herself.

"Good morning, Irma! What has you in such a chipper mood?" he inquired.

"Filius! You will not believe what I have got here!" she replied, caressing an old, leather-bound tome.

His interest piqued, the diminutive Professor shuffled towards her desk for a closer look.

When his eyes fell on the gilded lettering on the spine, he was almost rendered speechless. "Is this…? Can this be…?"

"It is, Filius! A first edition of Helveticus Hilmander's Compendium of Magickal Charms from 1156. Quite possibly the only remaining copy in existence."

"I must borrow it! This instant!"

"I am sorry, Filius, but this book will not be available for loan until I have finished reading it and added it to the library catalogue."

"But I must!" the Professor whined.

He kept begging, pleading and negotiating for the better part of an hour, but to no avail. Like generations of students before him, he was forced to acknowledge that Irma Pince was not to be bullied.

Soon enough, he found himself staring at the library doors. From the outside. Madam Pince had finally had enough and triggered the emergency evacuation charm he himself had placed on her desk just a few weeks ago, seeing both him and the handful of Ravenclaw students who had already set up quarters in the library banished.

"I'll make her render up her pages to me…" he muttered darkly as he turned and marched off towards his office.

"Ah, Harry! How good of you to meet me!" the headmaster beamed.

"You wanted to speak to me, Professor?"

"Yes, yes,… Why don't you take a seat, Harry? Lemon drop?"

Harry shook his head at the proffered tin. Dumbledore shrugged, picked a drop and popped it in his mouth before reclining in his own chair with a satisfied groan.

"Harry, my boy, the reason I asked to see you today is – Love… Love is a powerful and wondrous force, and even I in all my wisdom and experience cannot claim to have truly understood it."

"Professor?" Harry replied, unsure how to respond to this declaration.

"Yes, Love! Harry, I could not help noticing that you are feeling very strongly towards a certain girl."

"Ah, you want to give me a few pointers on how to convince Cho to go to the ball with me!"

"Erm, actually…"

"Don't worry, Professor, It's all good-natured banter. She's trying to stir my jealousy by pretending to be interested in Diggory, but once she realises that it does not work she will come around. Just today she told me that she dreams of us being the only two people on the planet."

"Harry…"

"So you see, it is all well in hand. I have already owl-ordered a nice dress for her to wear at the ball since I wouldn't be surprised if she keeps putting up the teasing until the very last minute, and…"

"Harry! Please, listen!"

Harry stopped in his ramblings and looked up at the headmaster. Dumbledore took off his glasses and rubbed the bridge of his nose.

"Harry, have you ever considered that Miss Chang might be serious about not being interested in your advances?"

"Of course I have! But once I got to know her better it quickly became quite obvious that she is interested. If she had shown any indication that she isn't I would have stopped pursuing her on the spot!"

Dumbledore wondered, not for the first time, whether there might be a hereditary brain defect in the male Potter line.

"Perhaps we should change the topic for a while. Let me tell you a story about myself. I know it is difficult to imagine, but your old headmaster was once as young and wild as you yourself are. And like you, I had discovered certain feelings towards a certain someone who I thought was playing hard-to-get."

"How did you convince her to go out with you?" Harry asked, hoping to get a few tips.

"I didn't. He was friendly enough, and he invited me to help him with a few of his independent study projects – nothing I would ordinarily have been interested in, but I though that maybe if I helped him, he would see how well we worked together. But nothing ever came of it despite all my wooing and courting efforts."

"So? He wasn't interested. That happens, Headmaster. I hope you didn't let it turn into an obsession!"

"For a while I did. But eventually I saw reason and moved on. By then I had gained a bit of perspective and spotted the flaws in his character that I had ignored for too long."

"Good for you, headmaster. There are plenty of fish in the sea."

"I wouldn't know, Harry. I never dated anybody else after that. I preferred to focus on my work instead."

"Did you stay in contact with him?"

"No, I defeated him in a duel, took his wand and locked him up in a warded tower."

"Okaaaay… Don't you think that was a bit extreme? I mean, I can see how the rejection must have hurt, but even so…"

"There is more to the story than I have told you, Harry. You see, he turned out to be this really evil dark lord…"

"Sure… Anyway, while it's, erm, nice to hear about your youth I'm not sure how that relates to my own situation. Unless you suggest that I challenge Cho to a duel…?"

"NO! That's not at all what I meant… Harry, surely you must see the parallels…"

"I'm sorry Headmaster, but I do not believe that Cho is evil, and I certainly won't lock her up in a tower. Good day."

As Harry left his office, Dumbledore buried his face in his palms. This discussion had not gone the way he had intended it to.

Still deeply in thought over the best way to get his revenge and lay his hands on Madam Pince's book, Professor Flitwick paid little attention where he was walking. It therefore came as a surprise to him when he suddenly tumbled over a human hurdle that had appeared in the middle of a deserted corridor.

Picking himself off the floor, he quickly realised that fate had guided him straight to a solution to his current troubles. The Weasley twins were still shuffling on the floor, no doubt trying to hide whatever prank item they had been installing when he had bumped into them.

"Mr and Mr Weasley! I am so sorry, I did not look where I was going! Are you both alright?"

"Yes, Professor!" they chorused, nodding eagerly while attempting to inconspicuously stuff two large leather bags down the backs of their trousers.

"Please, no need to get nervous, my young friends! After all, we do all enjoy the occasional well-executed prank. I haven't seen a thing" he said with a wink.

Two sets of shoulders relaxed and the smiles plastered on the twins' faces lost a good degree of the tension they had previously held.

"I do wonder… Now this is just idle curiosity, you need not answer if you don't want to. But… to your knowledge… has anybody in this school ever 'borrowed' one of the interesting potions stored in Professor Snape's personal cabinet?"

"Not that I know off… George?"

"Nope, I don't think anyone ever tried. Why are you asking, Professor?"

"This is somewhat awkward, but you see, a friend of mine is very much in love with another friend of mine… And I know for certain that the feeling is mutual, all it would require for love to blossom is a bit of… encouragement… I have also heard rumours that Professor Snape has brewed a certain, highly potent love potion which is currently stored in his personal cupboard. Unfortunately, the nature of the affair means that I cannot approach Professor Snape directly…"

"I think I see where this is going… What's in it for us?"

"Well, for once I would be far more inclined to turn a blind eye to certain happenings for a while… And I would be surprised if there wasn't a potion or two that raised your own interest in the cabinet. Just don't be too greedy and don't get caught, boys."

"We make no promises, Professor. But we see what we can do…"

Shortly afterwards, Professor Flitwick bumped into another teenage troublemaker. Harry Potter was marching up and down the corridor, practising what sounded like a personalised poem.

"Shall I compare thee to a summer's day? But summer is so far away! Willst thou respond to this mine call, and join me, Cho, to the Yule ball?"

Professor Flitwick shook his head. The boy had it bad. Maybe he could fix two problems with one cure? This would be even less ethical than his plans for Irma Pince, but surely it would do no harm to divert young Mr Potter's attentions…