Chapter 5
Clows last words peirced into his eyes. "I go now to join my Xiaolin.."
Then Meiling's words blasted into his head "You will find out more about yourself."
Syaoran's head reeled as he put the peices of the past and present together. Clow had loved Xiaolin and Xiaolin had loved Clow.. What was this saying to him? The Rashin board on his wall began to glow and Syaoran hopped down from his bed to grab it. He held it in his hands.
"What are you trying to tell me Xiaolin? You left this for me..I came to Japan to become master of the Clow Cards..but it had never been my destiny. So why did I come to Japan? To meet Sakura? That didn't end up being my destiny either so then..why?" Syaoran said to himself..chewing at his lip in hard thought.
Then suddenly like a strike of heavy lightning he was nearly floored as he finally understood what it all meant. Syaoran raced for the telephone on his dresser taking a quick look at his clock and counting the hour difference in his head.
"Good it's morning over there.." he said as he dialed numbers frantically.
On the other side a voice answered.
"Hello?"
"You knew..didn't you..you knew all about Clow's life up untill his death. You were the only one who truly knew..not even Yue and Kero fathomed what his life had been like."
"What? How did you..what do you mean?" came the shocked reply.
"I found Clow's old Diary." Syaoran responded flatly.
The other end went silent for a moment
"Yes..it's true Syaoran..but what do you want to know now?" Eriol sighed on the other end.
"I didn't fall for Yukito because of his magic did I."
"No..as Clow's descendant, his blood in you pulled towards his former guardian. But that is only half of your blood. The other half is descendant from Clow's cousin Xiaolin...who was half Li on his mother's, half Tsukishiro on his fathers. That is why the attraction you felt for Yukito was strong but secondary and since Sakura finally became the heir to Clow's magic..you fell for her."
"But Sakura and I didn't last, because I had never been meant for her. I had been meant for you wasn't I?" Syaoran spat angrily.
He could almost see the sad look on Eriol's face as he responded. "It's true I had not predicted you and Sakura getting together..but your appearance in Japan, fighting for the cards initially threw all of Clow's predictions into a warp. See, Sakura had always been meant to be Card Mistress. As Xiaolin's descendant you came to Japan to eventually meet me..a reunion between Clow and his Xiaolin. But the time you spent with Sakura had the magic between you two pulling towards each other since, I had not shown up yet and she was the closest thing to Clow. By the time I did, the deal was done. Yukito fell for Touya and you two got together."
"So then you.."
"It was too late for me..I ended up with the only other person besides Xiaolin and Yue to love Clow. The descendant of Madoushi..Kaho Mizuki." Eriol sighed.
Syaoran's gaze dropped to the floor of his bed as his tone softened with it, "But Clow never truly loved Madoushi..so does that mean..."
"It doesn't matter what it means now, Syaoran.."
Syaoran grew more forceful again, "It does! This all got screwed up..Xiaolin's spirit wanted me to come back and meet you..but it got twisted around by fate..when I should have known all along, paid more attention to my feelings around you..more importantly, how could you let me? Why didn't you say something, show me something? I never knew why you made me blush so much..why I couldn't stand being around you. It wasn't because I hated you like I previously thought, I was just shy, jealous, confused! And you knew it!"
"How could I have done anything? You fell for Clow's creation..Yukito so instantly, but you didn't fall for his reincarnation. When I saw everyone pairing with people they weren't destined for I took it as a sign. I thought you and Sakura would further the Reed bloodline, so I did the best that I could with my own destiny. Clow had always predicted I'd end up alone.."
"Well if I screwed up his initial predictions then let me screw them up again! Eriol..I now realize I..I.." Syaoran stuttered nervously.
"Don't say it! You don't truly know what you feel..our past lives don't have much to do with our present. I have to tell you the same thing I told Yue. I am not Clow..as such you can't be sure that you would love me as Xiaolin did..or that I.." Eriol trailed off hesitantly.
"So tell me now Eriol. Do you..or do you not love me? With all your memories of Clow aside, with our past lives aside..what do you feel for me?" Syaoran stated as his last ultimatum.
Eriol's breath had stopped on the other end of the line once again. Time passed before he finally exhaled, sure of his answer.
"I'm sorry Syaoran.." Eriol sighed.
Syaoran was about to try again when he heard something in the background.
"Eriol-sama I'm taking Sakura shopping now! We'll be back in a few."
It was obviously Nakuru's voice but had Syaoran heard her say Sakura? He almost dropped the phone as his jaw hung.
"Eriol?" Syaoran began but the other quickly chimed in frantically.
"I..I have to go..Syaoran."
With that Eriol hung up leaving Syaoran sitting on his bed with the phone to his ear long after the dial tone went dead.