If Only She Knew
Author's Note: (Zelia) - Hi everyone! Zelia here; plowing away at Chapter 2! The project has finally come to life! Yayness! And back to Yusuke-Kurama fandom for me as well; straying from my usual Yusuke-Hiei.

I sat there pensively, wondering how on Earth Hiei could have done something so terrible. His intentions meant well, but have undoubtedly done more harm than good. That is a fact most evident by the way the groom-to-be is acting.

I tried my hardest not to look Yusuke; instead choosing to focus on the light reflecting off of the neatly lined bar-glasses. Occasionally our short and young bartender would block my view; most often to check up on said groom.

I've never known him to drown out his sorrows. Yusuke was one who while emotional would face his problems. As far as any of us knew, Hiei's stunt only delayed the marriage. The groom was known for his impatience; however…

I don't believe impatience is a reason to consume sake so heavily. Certainly, there was something else stewing inside of the detective's brain.

"Yo, Kurama. What do you think?"

I blinked out of my momentary trance, and apologized, "Sorry, Kuwabara. I think that perhaps no one will take Hiei seriously, and that the cost of re-planning will be fair or free."

"Yeah right, Kurama," Yusuke jumped in, no slur evident in his speech, "You know Americans. Giving isn't in their nature." I watched him set his sake down, blinking emotion out of his eyes. Slender and masculine fingers tapped nervously against the bar, drumming a beautiful rhythm. To get lost in their music now would be dangerous.

"You should give your fiancée some credit," I suggested, my gaze desiring to meet his. His head slowly lifted; turbulent mocha grasping hold of emerald; stealing my much needed speaking breath; "Many women dream of their wedding day. I doubt your planner is so conniving."

"Damn that demon!" Yusuke cursed, "Where the hell does he get the idea that I don't love Keiko?"

"That squirt just enjoys our misery," Kuwabara grunted. I sensed that our tall friend had said that out of consolation and his own anger, not out of hatred for Hiei. He did respect him, and we all know that the teasing was an attempt to open up our dear friend.

"You're telling me," the other man replied. Man…when did we become men? Perhaps the moment that we had all embarked upon the task of working for Spirit World we grew up; which was much younger than society had set the bar for.

"I mean…" Yusuke continued, looking so much like a mature man, but still a spitting image of the boy that I adored then, "Who the hell else could I love? Botan? Your sister? I mean, doesn't he get it? Did I propose to either one of them? NO!" With the latter comment he pounded his fist on the table, gaining the attention of everyone around us, especially the bartender.

It hurt.

I ached to know what Yusuke's love could feel like. That statement only proved further that I had no way to enter his heart. Women were the first people that came to mind; and a human's sexuality cannot be changed forcefully; though such a thought of doing so sickens me. Being Shuichi; existing in a human world; it is painful and heartrending. This feeling is yet another sample of Youko's karma.

A now fleeting fantasy of Yusuke admitting that his true love was Shuichi Minamino continued its journey into oblivion. Keiko would have taken such a declaration with sadness and despair.

Then again…

"A beer please!" Kuwabara ordered.

"Gimme one too!" Yusuke shouted at the man, only to be told by his friend that the ordered beer was not for him, since he didn't like to partake in alcohol consumption.

This thought does not leave me. Sake is not the medicine for his impatience. No…he is worried what Keiko will think of this situation, perhaps what she will think of him. There could be many reasons he would want to marry her, aside from love…

Does he feel guilty for the many times that his life was in danger? The nights of worry that he had caused her? Was a proposal his way of repairing her? On the other hand, it could be a cover; suppose that he was fighting for another cause; one that wasn't necessary Keiko's love, but instead friendship. What a terrible mess…

"Hey, Kurama," Yusuke's voice called to me, "We're gonna jet."

"Yeah," the man to my right remarked, "I gotta catch up on some studies since some finals are comin' up, so would ya mind walking Yusuke home?"

"Of course not," I smiled truthfully, "That is, if our detective wouldn't mind."

"I'm not drunk or anything, I think I can walk myself," Yusuke smirked, "I'm a big boy now, remember?" He stood from his stool, then added, "But I wouldn't mind having someone to complain too." Thank goodness; even the tiniest rejection at this point disheartened me. His impending marriage was the biggest of them all.

We exited the bar, parting ways with Kuwabara at the door, and began to journey toward his home. Rain was rushing rapidly into the sewer grates that lined the pavement; desperately trying to act as if it hadn't tried to flood our dear city earlier in the night. Luckily by now, the sidewalks were only wet with puddles, and cars were non-existent; so getting splashed by a speeding vehicle was not going to happen.

"Great," Yusuke whined, "I'm gonna have to pay for dry-cleaning too. The rain's totally ruined my tux!" He began to waddle, a result of him trying to walk and inspect the cuffs of his pants, and remarked, "Damn it, these puddles are just too damn deep."

I sensed the urge to make him laugh; and what other way aside from flirting could I choose?

"I'll carry you over the puddles if you'd like," I offered, a grin creeping over my lips.

"No need, man. I can just…" However, his sentence was interrupted as I swept him up in my arms and carried him over the next three puddles. His legs; while mildly kicking; did not touch the ground at all, nor made an attempt to. He was too busy laughing at my antics.

"No, no…" I quipped, "That's quite alright. You'll melt in the rain; I know." He playfully punched me in the arm, still giggling, claiming that my hand was tickling his side.

"I guess this is how Keiko's gonna feel when I carry her over the threshold," the man in my arms laughed.

"Oh, no, quite different, I'm afraid," I responded jokingly, "You're very wet, and you won't have the displeasure of introducing your head to a doorframe." After all, I would be very cautious if I were to ever carry him over the threshold of a door…

"Hey!" Yusuke protested, "I ain't a klutz like Kuwabara!"

"I'm only teasing you," I assured him, striding through a rather deep puddle and splashing on purpose.

"Some husband you are!" Yusuke remarked in response to his newfound moistness, "You're getting me all wet!"

"Well," I said sarcastically, putting him down as we were only a few feet away from his building, "Maybe if you weren't cheating on me with Keiko I would have kept you dry!" His face seemed to turn a shade of pink; perhaps my ridiculous humor had embarrassed him.

"Well, thanks for the lift," he winked, "I'll see ya later, Kurama!"

I smiled; moments like that were so precious and deteriorated my pain. Such moments make me love him.

"Good night, Yusuke," I waved, bidding him farewell for the night.

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