"We could be in serious trouble..." Sakon said quietly, sucking on his vanilla milkshake.
"A milk-fucking-shake?" Tayuya said. "You're a goddamn rock star any you're drinking a milkshake? What the hell?"
"Seriously, this Battle of the Bands is a big dead," Sakon said, ignoring Tayuya's outburst.
"It's just a contest, it's junior high stuff," Kidoumaru said, leaning back in his chair as he loosened the top of the salt shaker.
"No, it's a lot bigger than that," Sakon responded, his voice dropping low. "You guys remember InoShikaChou?"
"Can I take your order?" Their waiter sighed, hands in his pockets.
"Where's your fucking pad?" Tayuya said.
"Too much of a bother writing all that down. I'll remember."
"Hey," Kidoumaru grinned a little, crossing his four arms. "Aren't you Nara Shikamaru, the guitarist"
Shikamaru's eyebrow twitched, "Uh, yeah."
"That is so funny! We were just talking about InoShikaChou!"
"Hey, I wanted to order..." Jiroubu began before Tayuya cut him off with a "Shut the fuck up and wait three goddamn minutes, you fat fuck. Boy, I guess I haven't had anything to eat in about an hour. Ever done that, lardass? Ever gone a whole hour without eating?"
"So," Kidoumaru went on. "You want to tell us what happened? Weren't you guys the biggest, baddest band in all of the Country of Fire?"
"That's...too troublesome."
"Really now? Cause I was just curious as to what could make you guys fail so much?"
"Kidoumaru..." Sakon said, a warning tone in his voice.
"Easy, easy, I'm just asking the guy a question. So, seriously, what made you guys such losers? I mean, you work in a freakin' diner."
Hands thrust into his pockets, Shikamaru yawned and started to slink away, "I'm gonna go take a nap. Yare yare, so troublesome."
Tayuya stood up, slamming her palms on the table, "Hey! You forgot our fucking order! Fatty here's gonna have a heart attack if he doesn't get something into his massive gut soon!"
A gust of wind swept all their hair back as a young blond girl with her hair at the bun appeared in front of them, holding a pad and pen with a huge smile plastered on her face. "Hello and welcome to the Ichiraku Diner, my name is Ino and I will be your server tonight. Can I start you guys off with something to drink?"
Kidoumaru threw up his four arms with a laugh, "I can't believe it! You're Yamanaka Ino, lead singer of InoShikaChou! That's amazing! Does the whole band work here?"
A sweat drop appeared above Ino's head in that magical fake way, "...Chouji's our chef. After we got out of the music business, we scraped enough money together to buy this diner."
Kidoumaru leaned back in his chair, grinning, "And why did you guys get out of the music business anyway?"
"Kidou! Stop! They're going to take a crap in our food!" Sakon said.
"Hush, she doesn't mind. Do you, little lady?"
Her eyebrow twitched a little in response, "There was a contest..."
"That contest wouldn't happen to have been the Konoha Battle of the Bands, would it?"
"Yeah...it was...Are you sure you guys don't just want to order?" Ino's face was like watching a pot of water about to come to a rolling boil.
"No, no, we'd much rather hear this."
"I'd like to order..." Jiroubu said.
"Shut up, fatty!" Kidoumaru and Tayuya said in unison. "Now," Kidoumaru said, lacing the fingers of all four hands together on the table. "How'd you guys become the biggest failure in ninja rock history?"
Ino slammed her palm down on the table, grabbing Kidoumaru by his shirt, "It's all Rock No Jutsu's fault! Those jerks showed up at one of our concerts and directly challenged us! We faced off in the finals and we gave the show of a lifetime! You should have heard us! We were amazing! And those stupid corrupt judges gave it to Rock No Jutsu!"
Kidoumaru waved all four hands in front of him, "Whoa, easy, easy, I was just asking a question."
Kuroko scrambled around behind Ino as pillars of fire erupted behind her, "And those stupid ungrateful fans didn't want anything to do with us after that! No, no, no! Shows got cancelled, our album fell down the charts! And Shikamaru just sat there staring at the clouds and Chouji just stuffed his fat face with chips!"
Tayaya grinned wickedly as Ino shook Kidoumaru violently, "Hey, didn't you have a solo album?"
With that, Ino's face became a bright red and she hoisted Kidoumaru up, throwing him across the room, smashing through another table. Throwing her pad to the ground, she stormed off, leaving a wake of destruction behind her.
"She isn't going to take our order, is she?" Jiroubu said, looking dejected.
Sakon leaned in, "I'll repeat this to Kidoumaru when he wakes up, but the thing we have to remember is this: The Country of Fire loves a winner. And it cannot stand a loser. The stakes here are big, bigger than ever. You saw what happened to InoShikaChou, this live could very well break us. We need to practice, and practice hard. We need to be the best, we need to completely crush Team 7, without a shadow of a doubt."
"Could we maybe eat first?" Jiroubu said, patting his stomach.
"Shut up, you walking sebaceous gland!" Tayuya said. "You're such a fat piece of crap! Maybe you should get together with the fat ass chef of this place--"
Tayuya's tirade was cut off by a loud roar as Chouji burst through the doors of the kitchen, wielding a meat cleaver. "I'm not faaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat!" he screamed, his eyes all white and his face distorted with rage.
The band quickly stood up. "Oh crap," Sakon said. "Run, run!" Dragging Kidoumaru's unconscious body behind them, the scrambled out of the diner, hotly pursued by a 300 pound former drummer swinging a cleaver.