A/N: Hello, everyone! This will be the first fiction done by the three wise(ass) monkeys! I am Iwazaru-san!
Kikazaru: Kikazaru-san!
Mizaru: Mizaru-san!
All together: WE CAN SLASH ANYTHING!!!
::everyone bows::
Disclaimer:
Iwazaru: ::sighs:: I'm too poor to own them...
Kikazaru: Besides, if I owned it, there'd be a WINGED BISHIE! And all the men would be having happy man-sex together! Yar...
Mizaru: ::turns away:: I'm not taking part in this insanity. Tell me when the fic starts...
Iwazaru: ::pouts:: cheapskate... Okay. So we're agreed on this. We do not own or receive royalties from DragonBall, DragonBallZ, or DragonBallGT.
Mizaru: But we're not going into DragonBall...whatever.
Kikazaru: It might...
Mizaru: No.
Iwazaru: ::chuckles evilly:: Who knows...?
Mizaru: This is getting long. Finish already.
Iwazaru: Should we put a disclaimer up?
Kikazaru: What for? It's in the summary outside.
Iwazaru: Yeah, but—
Mizaru: No more talking! English Major Mizaru, Special Attack! EDITING CHOP!!
Chapter One
"Bulma, it's so nice to see you again!" Chi-Chi said, setting tea out. "It's been so long since you've stopped by."
"I know," Bulma sighed, sitting down with an apologetic smile. "Vegeta's been in this training craze, Father's been in an inventing craze, Trunks has officially become a dating demon, and Mother is convinced that shopping is the cure to it all." She paused to smile. "Actually, Mother wasn't that wrong."
Chi-Chi huffed. "With your son dating so much, you're bound to get grandchildren anytime now." She cast a withering glare towards her son's room. "Gohan spends all his time studying. I don't think he's ever been on even one date!"
"Well, you did raise him to be a scholar," Bulma replied. "And besides—"
A shockwave interrupted Bulma, making to two women dive for the good china on reflex until it had passed. The two women breathed a sigh of relief before they glanced at each other. Chi-Chi's expression darkened before she turned to the door, a hand going out automatically for the frying pan hanging innocently by the door. Bulma followed close behind, a deep scowl pulling at her lips.
Outside, they were met with a singed lawn and two battered and bloody men. Goku sat on the ground, looking exhausted but happy while Vegeta stood over him with a victorious smirk.
"Vegeta!" Bulma yelled, starting towards her husband.
"Goku!" Chi-Chi echoed, raising her household weapon threateningly. "How many times do I have to tell you to keep your little fights with that man away from the house?!"
Goku yelped as his wife administered punishment, bringing the thick pan down on his head with a solid gong. "I'm sorry, Chi-Chi! We were sparing and lost track of where we were! Honest!"
"I warned you about this, Vegeta!" Bulma hissed, glaring up at him. "I distinctly told you not to fight near houses. Ours in particular!"
Vegeta snorted, throwing her a contemptuous look. "I am the Prince of Sayians, woman! I will not take orders from some low-class—"
Bulma's eye twitched before she lost her temper. "Then you won't eat!" She screeched, poking him in the chest. "And you won't have your precious Gravity Chamber fixed!"
"You dare to threaten me?" Vegeta hissed. He raised his hand, opening his palm towards her. "I could snuff out your energy without even a thought."
Bulma lifted her chin. "You just try it, Vegetable-man."
"That's not very nice, Vegeta," Goku objected, standing up and dusting himself off. "You shouldn't threaten people."
Vegeta shot Goku a glare. "Now you think to give me orders, clown?" He smirked. "Need I remind you who won our last match?"
Goku laughed, one hand going behind his head sheepishly. "Naw, that's alright! You've really improved lately. I'm going to have to start really training again, or you might end up stronger than me!"
Vegeta choked indignantly. "I am already stronger than you, you idiot! I was going easy on you today!"
"Really? Wow, thanks Vegeta!" Goku grinned. "I was so exhausted after sparring with Gohan earlier that I couldn't really go full-out with you. We should spar at full power one of these days!"
Vegeta's black eyes glittered with the challenge. "Just pick your day, Kakkarott. I will be more than happy to show you once and for all why I am the Prince of all Sayians!"
"Oh, no you don't!" Bulma snapped, pushing Vegeta away from Goku. "Playtime's over for you, buddy! We're going home!"
"What?!" Vegeta snarled. "We just got here, you stupid woman!"
"Yeah, five hours ago!" Bulma agreed. "I promised Mother I'd have you back in time for dinner, and damnit, that's where you're going!"
A loud rumble interrupted them, and they turned to look at Goku, unsurprised. The dark-haired man grinned foolishly and rubbed his stomach.
"Hey, Chi-Chi, dinner does sound really great!" He said, looking wistfully at his wife.
Chi-Chi glared at him and hit him again. "And just what did you mean by saying that you were fighting with Gohan today?!" She yelled. "He was supposed to be studying all day!"
Goku's eyes widened and he clapped his hands over his mouth. "Heh heh. Whoops!"
"'Whoops?!'" Chi-Chi screeched, wielding her pan threateningly. "You're turning our precious little son into a...a hoodlum and all you have to say is whoops?!"
"Aw, but Chi-Chi!" Goku objected, backing away towards the relative safety of this house. "Gohan's a growing boy! He needs exercise!"
"Then he can do jumping-jacks!" Chi-Chi howled, chasing after him. She paused abruptly and turned back to Bulma with a kind smile. "It was lovely seeing you again, dear. Do try to make time in your schedule to drop by again and see me." She shot a glare at Vegeta. "Without that man." She smiled again. "Have a safe trip home!"
Bulma watched in a sort of horrid fascination as Chi-Chi took off after her husband, screaming at him again. Then she turned to Vegeta.
"You know," she said slowly, turning with him to head back to the hover car. "After spending time here, it makes me appreciate things more at home."
Vegeta grunted an agreement and took to the air.
Bulma looked up as a low rumble shook the walls of her house and sighed, throwing down her latest invention. She glanced at the clock on the wall and stood reluctantly.
"I suppose I should be grateful," she grumbled, snatching up her capsule pack that contained her repair kit. "It did take him more than a week this time to destroy the Gravity Chamber."
"Woman!"
"Shut up, Vegeta!" Bulma yelled, throwing the door open and going out to their front yard to survey the damage. "I already have a head ache from the damn explosion. I don't need your voice to make it worse!"
"Then make the repairs quick this time," Vegeta snarled, storming away from the smoking wreck. "And it better be before nightfall!"
"Yeah, fine. Whatever!" Bulma snapped, storming over the debris. "Just don't bother Chi-Chi!"
"I do not take orders from some low class woman!" Vegeta snarled back, taking off. "Just fixed the blasted machine!"
"Just fix the blasted machine, he says," Bulma sneered, snapping open her capsule case and releasing the cleaning bots. "Get the rubble cleaned up," she told them, stepping over the mess to get to the remains of the door. "Maybe I can salvage some of the computer's core programming," she mumbled to herself.
She looked around at the mess and estimated that less than half of the chamber was left. With another sigh, she sat down to work. It would take hours to repair everything, but if she worked quickly, she would have time to finish up her newest invention inside before dinner.
"Ah! Bulma, here you are!" Dr. Briefs grinned, entering his daughter's lab. "I've been looking for you."
Bulma looked up from finishing her report. "I just got finished repairing Vegeta's training room. What do you need?"
He came over and set a small disk next to her computer. "I've been meaning to get this to you. There's a bunch of encrypted files that I couldn't decode, so I thought it would be a good project for you."
Her interest piqued now, Bulma picked up the disk and examined it closely. "What kind of encryption could it have that you couldn't have cracked it, Dad?"
He shrugged a little. "I took it from Vegeta's ship when I was renovating it that time. Sayian dialect is hard enough, but I just can't get past their safeguard."
Bulma smiled slowly, her light blue eyes sparkling with the prospect of a challenge. "I'll look into it, Dad," she promised.
"Have fun, dear," Dr. Briefs chuckled, turning to leave. He paused at the doorway and looked back to her. "Oh, and Chi-Chi called earlier, saying something about Vegeta picking fights with Goku again."
Bulma growled, clenching her fist in irritation. "That man...! I swear, one day..."
Dr. Briefs laughed. "Of course, dear. I'll see you in the morning."
"Good night, Daddy," Bulma murmured, already bent over her computer screen as she open the disk up.
"Now, let's see what our little Sayian Prince had to read in outer space," Bulma murmured to herself, her fingers working over the keyboard furiously.
Two hours later, Bulma sat back from the screen with a cheer. "Ha ha! I did it! They call that a safeguard? Psshh." She stretched for a moment before turning her attention back to the computer. "Okay, this had better be some good stuff."
Bulma looked through the folders carefully, discarding one after another as they failed to catch her attention. History...agriculture...galaxy maps...mating history... planets for purging...
"Woah, woah," Bulma went back two folders, her eyes lighting up. "What do we have here?" A click and the folder was open, the freshly translated page opening to her.
Bulma read through the file slowly, her eyes wide. Then she read it again, excitement rising. "This...this is..." She stood abruptly. "I've got to tell Chi-Chi!" A glance at the clock showed it to be half past four in the morning, and a yawn worked it's way free from the aqua-haired woman. "Tomorrow," she concluded.
Iwazaru: That's all for chapter one!
Kikazaru: Boring! Where's the good stuff?!
Iwazaru: ::frowns:: It's coming up! ...Eventually...
Kikazaru: Now!
Mizaru: No! Plot first! Then senseless sex scenes!
Kikazaru: ...Fine. There'd better be a winged bishie somewhere in—
Mizaru: Argh! Too long! EDITING CHOP!!!
Iwazaru: ::pokes head back in:: Review!
Mizaru: ::growls::