Author's Notes:

Iwazaru: It's not my fault we took so long!

Mizaru: Yeah, Kikazaru became distracted.

Kikazaru: WINGED BISHIES! Krad is shiny…

Iwazaru: Anyway, after this chapter, we will have to move this story to adult fan fiction. Yay! There will be happy hot man-sex!

Iwazaru: (deadpan) Don't expect much. It's my first time.

Kikazaru & Mizaru: (cackle maniacally)

Chapter 3

Bulma.

The young scientist jumped and looked around, certain she had heard someone calling for her. If it was that asshole again, so soon after she'd repaired the gravity chamber, he was so going to get it!

Bulma, I have finished collecting the dragon balls.

Bulma's eyes widened and she sat up straight. "Piccolo?"

Yes. Now, come meet us at Dende's Lookout. I am collecting Goku's woman as we speak.

"Right, I'm on my way!" Bulma stood quickly, trembling with excitement. This was it!

Barely remembering to shut off her computer and lock up the lab, Bulma scooped up her fastest encapsulated air bike and raced for the door.

"Vegeta, I'm going out!" Bulma called as she dashed out, noticing him preparing to enter the gravity chamber. "If you break that thing in less than three hours, I swear to god—!"

"Your harping is grating on my nerves, woman!" Vegeta snarled back, glaring at her. "Now be gone from my sight before I conveniently forget those damnable vows you tricked me into and vaporize you where you stand!"

Bulma's eye twitched and she threw the capsule to the ground. "Oooh, just you wait, Vegeta," she grumbled under her breath. "I'll get you back for everything."

"Not in a million years, woman!" Vegeta's short, mocking laugh echoed across the yard. "I am Vegeta, PRINCE OF ALL SAIYANS!"

"Yeah, yeah," Bulma grumbled. "We are all very impressed and intimidated yadda yadda. See you around, Veg-head!"

By the time Bulma managed to get to the top of Dende's Lookout, Piccolo, Chi-Chi, and the demi-god himself were gathered around the dragon balls, discussing what wishes were to be made.

"I realize Vegeta and Goku are not exactly harmonious," Dende was saying, looking worried, "but do you really think using Shenron will fix that?"

"Who knows?" Chi-Chi shrugged, dismissing the matter. "We're doing it."

"If I didn't know any better, I would say you weren't actually doing this for peace between Goku and Vegeta," Piccolo rumbled, crossing his arms.

"Of course she's not," Bulma agreed, joining them. "It just happens to be an added bonus. Ready, Chi-Chi?"

Chi-Chi's lips curled into an eager and ever-so-slightly sinister smile. "Oh, yes…"

"Excellent," Bulma rubbed her hands together and turned her attention to the seven small golden balls. "Dende, would you like to do the honors?"

Dende glanced at the two women warily before sighing and raising his hands. Whatever happened, it couldn't be that bad, he reasoned. "Arise, Shenron! Rise, and hear our wishes!"

Almost immediately the dragon balls began to pulse and glow as the sky darkened and lightening struck around them. There was a low, bone-deep roar before the balls gave one more pulse and a great golden light shot up into the sky.

"I know it may be a little late to ask," Dende called to Bulma as the dragon began to materialize, "but you are sure that these wishes of yours won't have any ill-effects… right?"

Bulma considered this seriously for a moment. "Well…to be completely honest with you, Dende, after this, Goku and Vegeta will end up making peace or destroying the world. I'm really not sure which, though."

"Wha—"Dende's panicked exclamation was cut short as Shenron spoke.

"For what reason have I been summoned here?" The Eternal Dragon demanded, eyeing Dende.

"To grant our wishes!" Bulma called, pulling his attention to her, and immediately regretting it.

"Speak your wishes," he commanded, "and if it is within my power to grant them, they shall be yours."

Bulma gulped and grinned up at the dragon. "My first wish is that Earth's moon be brought back without the ability to turn Saiyans into that giant monkey form—"

"Oozaru," Piccolo muttered.

"—Oozaru!" Bulma added, flashing a wink at Piccolo in thanks.

Shenron was silent for a long moment before his red eyes flared. "It has been done. What is your second wish?"

Thrilled that their plan was working so successfully, Bulma grinned up at Shenron. "My second wish—"

"Shit!" Piccolo growled, cutting Bulma off. "Goku is almost here!"

"What!" Chi-Chi screeched. She turned to her coconspirator. "Hurry, Bulma!"

"Right!" Bulma turned back to the dragon and blurted out her wish quickly. "I wish Vegeta and Goku had their tails back!"

There was a shift in the air, and suddenly Goku was standing beside Chi-Chi, looking around curiously. "Huh. I thought I sensed someone summoning Shenron. Hey, Bulma, what are we going to wish fo—aahh!"

Bulma watched avidly as Goku howled, his hands going to grip his back side as he danced from foot to foot. He sank to his knees, crying out as his hands clawing at the seat of his pants.

"Goku?" Chi-Chi called, worried over the distressing sounds that her husband was making.

"It hurts!" Goku moaned. "Chi-Chi—aaahhh!"

There was a sound of cloth tearing as Goku screamed, and he pitched forward on his hand and knees as a brown, thick, furry tail shot out through the hole in his pants and began to flail around wildly.

"Your wishes have been granted," Shenron boomed. "And now, I go."

The dragon returned to the balls, which immediately became stones, and they all watched them soar up into the sky before zooming away.

Bulma turned her full attention on the Saiyan man that was now sitting on the floor, looking barely winded. "Goku, are you alright?"

"Yeah, I'm fine now," Goku said, turning this way and that to try to catch a hold of his still-waving tail. "Only." He threw a confused look at Bulma and Chi-Chi as he finally caught it gently and began to stroke it calmly. "Why do I have my tail back?"

"Obviously it's because that was one of our wishes!" Bulma snapped, tapping her foot. "Where the hell is that jackass? He's—"

"Woman!" Vegeta's roar as he reached the Lookout, powered up to level two in his fury, shook the very stones beneath their feet. Bulma smiled, turning to meet Vegeta's rage full on.

"You did this!" The Saiyan Prince yelled, his black tail lashing back and forth, echoing his anger. "I know you did!"

"I did," Bulma agreed, crossing her arms smugly.

Vegeta's glare turned darker, and he stepped towards her threateningly. "Then I suggest you undo it. Right now!"

Bulma shrugged and replied pleasantly. "Sorry, Vegeta. I can't."

Vegeta nearly shook with anger now, his tail bristling. "What do you mean 'can't'!"

"Oh, hey!" Goku cried, looking at Vegeta's tail. "You got yours back, too! That's great, Vegeta!"

"Idiot!" Vegeta howled, slamming his fist into Goku's face. "In what way is this a good thing!"

Goku, caught off guard, had taken the hit fully and slid back a few feet. He rubbed his face, wincing a little. "Ow! Geez, Vegeta, I was only saying that we'll be stronger now, that's all. You didn't have to hit me."

Vegeta's temper snapped, and he tilted his head back to scream into the sky. "I am surrounded bycomplete morons!"

"That's not a nice thing to say about Bulma and Chi-Chi," Goku pointed out.

"The moon, you idiot!" Vegeta snarled, pointing up. "Have you not even noticed the damn moon!"

Goku looked up and could just barely make out the almost full moon against the bright sky. "Oh, wow! Will you look at that? It really is back!" He looked back to Bulma. "Did you wish for that, too, Bulma?"

"Yep!" Bulma grinned back at the man.

"You have completely lost your mind, woman!" Vegeta raved. "You must have, to have forgotten what happens the night of the full moon!"

Bulma traded sly looks with Chi-Chi. "Actually," she drawled, "we're kind of counting on it."

"What!"

"Goku, dear," Chi-Chi called to her husband. "We made special changes to this new moon, so it is perfectly alright for you and the others to look at it when it's full. Remember to let Gohan know about it, too."

"Sure thing, Chi-Chi!" Goku cheered. "This is going to be so neat! I haven't watched a full moon in forever!"

"Of course. Bulma," Chi-Chi called, wandering away with Goku. "Give me a call later on tonight so we can finish up…things."

"Sure thing, Chi-Chi!" Bulma promised, returning to her air bike as Vegeta took off in a furious huff. She waved at the two Namekians over her shoulder. "Thanks for the help guys!"

Dende offered a weak smile and wave. "Any…time?"

After the women and their respective husbands had zoomed off out of sight, the Guardian of Earth turned to Piccolo.

"Do you think we did the right thing?" He asked hesitantly.

Piccolo sighed. "Probably not. In fact, I'm willing to bet that they'll end up destroying the earth in less than a month."

Dende echoed his mentor's sigh. "Probably. I don't know how I'm going to explain this to the Kais."

Ending Notes:

Mizaru: While editing the scene where Vegeta and Goku get tails, I had an epiphany. Vegeta is a kitty. Therefore, I was forced to edit accordingly (hence, his tail must bristle, etc.).

Iwazaru: Yes…and Goku is a puppy.

Kikazaru: (Squeals) Vegeta-kitty! I want fan art now!

Mizaru: Kikazaru is not allowed to speak with anything other than exclamation points.

Kikazaru: Dammit!

Iwazaru: At least Kikazaru would notice tense changes, without saying "Hey! That's past tense. When did it change to past tense? I missed it (forlorn)."

Kikazaru: It's like she went to the bathroom in the middle of the movie, and realized when she came back that she missed something important.

Mizaru: (hurriedly) This is too long, Editing Chop!