Disclaimer: That ruffian Toriyama went and done bought himself the rights to Dragonball Z. Not me! BLAST!
-Cell: Master of Insanity-
Vegeta stood there in absolute darkness, he wasn't quite sure where he was. But he knew it was thanks to that damned sack of death. He also had an itch on his back he couldn't quite reach. It was annoying him, annoying him so much that he was going off-topic just to comment on it.
Vegeta…"Who's there?" Vegeta spun around quickly. "Show yourself!"
I'm in front of you, you fucking nit!"Oh, right… Sorry"
It seems you have met up with our runaway abomination, the sack! We have brought you here, to the land of inexplicable power-ups in order to help you combat the sack menace!
"Power-up. Eh?" Vegeta stroked his chin. "How much stronger will I get?"
You'll become SO powerful, that you could kill Chou Gohan by simply coughing in his general direction.
"I like it!" Vegeta jumped up and down with glee. "Finally Kakarot! I will show you the meaning of defeat. With my mighty hand, I will strike you down like the sad creature you are. You remind me of my uncle Kakaroff. Oh he was such a card! A trap card, mind you. But a card none-the-less!"
Uh...Vegeta?"I hope you remember those times that you defeated me in battle Kakarot! Because soon the tables will be turned! I am Super Vegeta! Prince of all Saiyans. I will strike you down, steal your wallet and go buy some brand of expensive shampoo. Not the women shampoo though! I don't want to turn girly… Though these spandex do make my arse look big. It's quite distressing, you know."
You can stop now!"Never-the-less! I will become so powerful that I will destroy you by simply blinking. Vegeta: Man of the wonder-blink, they will call me. But now the tides have changed! And if I don't get out of this water soon, my skin is going to get all pr—wait. No! That's not it… FUCK!"
-
"This is Random Reporter. Reporting to you from Satan City! It seems the down has been run over by Zombies! And with no STARS members about. It seems things are going to get ugly. Michael Moore ugly." The reporter looked to her cameraman. "See? I made a political joke, it's funny because people don't like him, and think he's silly. Get it? DO YOU? ANSWER ME?"
"Ple.ase..stop..choking…me"
"Oh right. Anyway, it seems that Satan City is doomed! But no one cares. The Dragonballs can revive us, even though we aren't supposed to know what they are. Kekekekeke."
-
"Piccolo? Did you hear that?" Dende called out to the other Namek.
"Yes I did Dende. I believe it's time to call out the Super Mighty Namekian Squad!"
"You can't be serious?"
"Oh I am. As serious as a bowl of cheese!"
"…That's not very serious, you know"
"It isn't? I always thought they were serious things. Always sitting there… with their beady little eyes… why did you hurt me mother? Why did you hurt me so?"
"Uh. Piccolo? Namekians don't have mothers."
"Right! Aside from that, I believe we should get out the Super Mighty Namekian Squad!"
"I'll go get them" Dende sighed as walked off behind the lookout. Seriously contemplating jumping off it.
-
"Alright labor slaves!" Frieza called out to his cast. "This is the final dramatic scene. It's so dramatic. That I had to actually give you scripts in order to bloody well make it."
"Yes, that does make sense" Dodoria muttered.
"Places everyone!" Frieza clapped and the crew scattered about the set. Within a few short moments, everything was ready for his dramatic scene. "Cooler! You can use the take-marker now… Cooler? Cooler!"
Everyone started muttering on the set when a door flung open and a metallic figure walked in, making funky clanking noises as he went. It was Meta-Cooler! "I am here, brother!"
"It's about time. And what's with the metal?"
"That evil take-marker made me lose so many body parts that I had to go and turn myself into a robot!"
"Whatever. Just use the damned thing."
"Fine. Fine. Scene 3450, take 1 and… Action!" Cooler smacked the take-marker. He waited a few moments before he noticed that nothing had fallen off. "Finally. The curse of the take-marker has been lifted. Wait a minute! Why is my metallic body rusting? No! Curse you, take-marker! CURSE YOU!"
-
Gohan was in the middle of a dark, smelly cave. Well he wasn't entirely sure he was in the middle of it. But he had a generally decent idea that was far enough from the entrance to warrant such a statement. He was weird like that.
"Why the hell am I looking for father in a cave?"
"Gohan!"
"Father? What are you doing here?"
"I'unno. Seemed like a good idea at the time." Goku shrugged. "You wanted to speak to me?"
"Yes. Cell is back and he said if I don't find some random items, that he was going to destroy the world. And you knew where they were."
"Cell is lying. I have no idea where a destroy the world is!"
"I meant the items!"
"Oh… Right, I know where they are!"
"Can you please tell me?"
"Nononononono! I can't just tell you! First you must complete an assortment of crazy and down right suicidal quests. One of them will be to attack an angry Orc with +56 STR. They will bite your face off and all other organs in your body. Only after that is complete, can I tell you to location of the items."
"Or we could not do that!"
"No! Your mind games will not work on me. The Legendary Super Saiyan: Son Goku!"
"I'm stronger than you." Gohan sighed.
"LIES! Uncle TOEI told me about you Gohan. You're an evil man! You suck the powers out of others in order to make them your own. Well you're not getting my blood. Kamehameha!"
"Dad. When you scream out an attack. It helps to actually do it as well."
"Only villains do that! The Dark Side of the Ki will not tempt me. I was pure, good. ALLY TO GOOD! NIGHTMARE TO YOU!"
"Why do you the keep screaming that?"
"Force of habit, son."
-
The citizens of Satan City were running about in a mad panic. Not a calm panic, mind you. A mad one. We clear on that, mister? Yes? Good! When the Super Mighty Namekian Squad landed to save the day.
"Hahaha! Evil Zombies!" Piccolo laughed. "You may be winning now, but soon we will change that! I am Piccolo! With the power of regeneration!"
"I am Dende!" The Namek twirled about in a ridiculously stupid fashion. "With the power to heal!"
"WHAT?" Guru yelled out.
"Tell them what you do, Guru." Piccolo sighed.
"WHAT?"
"I am Green Pedestrian Light. With the power to help people know when to walk!"
"I am Nail!" The warrior pranced about with an incredibly bizarre staff. "SEXY BEAM!" And with that, Nail was surrounded in light and transformed into Sexy Nail! Nail felt so proud of himself, and he felt sexy as well. The Namekians glee was cut short when he noticed everyone looking at him oddly. "…WHAT?"
"Anyway!" Piccolo turned back to the Zombies. "We are hear to kick your arse!"
The Super Mighty Namekian Squad was about to leap into action when a massive explosion sent a good portion of the Zombies flying in random directions, in the middle of the smoking crater stood Tenshinhan!
"Good job, Ten!" Yamcha called out. "We're saving the city, like heroes. GLEE!"
"Hey!" Piccolo screamed out. "We are here to save the city!"
"Like hell you are Mr. Green-man!" Yamcha spat at the Namek. "We Humans don't get enough air time. We need to stay important you know!"
"It's not like us Nameks gave it easy either!" Dende stepped forward. "Right, Guru?"
"WHAT?"
"Ugh.."
"Well!" Chouzu stepped up. "It looks like we are going to have to have a competition in order to see who wins the title of Protector of Earth!"
-
"And now!" Frieza yelled out in front of an incredibly captivated audience. That is to say that Brolly was busy knawing on Turles' head and Janemba was in the corner muttering like an idiot. But everyone else was rather sane. And that's what counts! "I present to you, my very first movie. The world is a robot…"