Nez: We're back!

Zan: Yeah! Another spiffy fic chapter!

Nez: Michigan weather is so much fun by the way. It allowed me to stay inside and type this whole thing up because it was snowing and then raining quite hard.

Zan: We is not owning rights to HP or Maraurders, but we do own the exclusive rights to Herfamiffapolous. Nez made it up you know.

Nez: Baka. -bops Zan-

Chapter Twelve: Herfamiffapolous

Sirius sat grumpily in Fish-chan's shared apartment, watching television on the couch. He had been held captive there by his former girlfriend and she was not going to let him out until he met her demands. She had even taken away his wand so he could not use magic to escape.

"Oh, come on Sirius..." Fish-chan whined. "Come with me to Heframiffapolous and meet everyone there. It will be fun..."

"I am not your boyfriend anymore so it doesn't matter," Sirius grumbled. "Besides, if your parents ran some sort of background check on me, it would say I am somewhere around forty instead of eighteen. I don't think they'd believe you if we told them where I came from."

"Yes they would," Fish-chan protested. "They believed that I went back in time."

"I very well could have just taken a potion to appear younger..."

"You are coming with me!"

"Fish..."

"Sirius!"

"You remember the last time I met your sister..."

"...and you are going to meet my mom and step-dad and brother too, now come on!" Fish-chan stood there and pouted.

It really was not in Sirius's best interest to go away to Herfamiffapolous, nor leave the country period, yet he just could not help himself. Agreeing was the only way to escape the wretched apartment and get the chance to run over to safety at Nehszriah's house or even Chels's house. Reluctantly, he got up and went to go put on his boots.

"You're coming!" Fish-chan squealed.

"I guess, if it'll make you shut up..."

"Oh thank you!" Fish-chan yelped, hugging Sirius. He blushed as she hopped off to leave a note for her roommates. It made him sort of remember why he started dating her in the first place.

Hurriedly, Fish-chan dragged Sirius out the door and over to the air port and they both hopped onto a plane that took them to the European continent. From there, Fish-chan roamed around for a while, not letting Sirius know where the really were. Finally, they came upon the tiny mountain country of Herfamiffapolous.

As Fish-chan and Sirius walked through Herfamiffapolous, Sirius could sense something was peculiar. It was unusual how the citizens were milling about, doing their daily chores. The setting looked almost like it was taken from smack in the middle of the Renaissance in Germany with a touch of nineteenth century flair. Sirius could catch modern technology every once in a while too. The beeping of a cell phone, the lyrics of a Queen song, the sight of modernly packaged goods inside a store: it was all quite confusing to poor Sirius.

"Fish," he asked. "Is there some sort of festival going on or something? Everyone here looks a bit odd."

"No, you are the one who looks odd," Fish-chan said frankly. She was right. In all of the old and elaborate costumes, the gothic punk Sirius stood out like an icky black bruise. Fish-chan seemed to blend in with the crowd a bit though, for she had on her long purple skirt and a white blouse. She clutched onto Sirius's hand as they wove their ways through the city streets. Soon, they came to the gates of the wall surrounding the castle. As Sirius was led in by Fish-chan, he thought he saw something out of the corner of his eye.

"Carl-kun?" he muttered, snapping his head back to look. He could have sworn he saw him sitting down on a bench near the water fountain that sat right in front of the gates, but when he looked, there was no Carl-kun.

"Come on!" Fish-chan groaned as she dragged her Sirius towards the menacing-looking castle. There were wicked gargoyles on perches and maniacal statues of men slaying beasts and all sorts of interesting creatures on the grounds.

"Man, you must have a true medieval castle here," Sirius said as Fish-chan dragged him into the castle.

"Yeah, it was passed down in my step-dad's family for generation upon generation," Fish-chan replied.

Quietly, the two teens walked through the menacing castle, neither saying a word. Sirius expected too much for a painting to move, a ghost to pop from the walls, but nothing happened. It was a Muggle castle and there was an unusual lack of spirits and random moving paintings that wizards would plant in a castle full of Muggles for fun.

"So," Sirius asked after a while. "Where are we going?"

"To see my step-father's assistant."

"Why would we need to see his assistant?"

"So we can have an audience with him, of course."

"Did I ever tell you I am nervous around royalty?"

"Have you ever been around royalty?"

"Too nervous."

"Fish-chan!" a random voice yelled. Fish-chan turned around briskly and ran back down the hall.

Where have I heard that voice? Sirius thought. He too turned around to see...

"Toran?" he gasped, jaw dropping to the floor. Sure enough, there was Nehszriah's classmate Toran, all dressed up in a spiffy costume that made him resemble slightly a Japanese feudal nobleman with a clipboard in his hands.

"Sirius, you know Mr. Toran?" Fish-chan asked, observing her shocked boyfriend.

"Weren't you over at Ureth's house the other day?" Sirius asked Toran.

"Can't say I know this person of which you speak."

"You know: Ureth. He's the kid with the large skull and a bunch of Playstation games?"

"I cannot say that I have picked up a video game controller in my life, nor have I met you," the Toran-person said. Sirius was shocked. Why was Toran here, in a funny outfit and denying he had never come in contact with what he swore was his life? It just did not make sense.

"Sirius, are you feeling alright?" Fish-chan asked. Sirius nodded and in return, Toran scribbled something on his clipboard.

"Now we need to get the two of you ready before you can see His Majesty," Toran said. He shoved Fish-chan and Sirius off to some servants and before long, they were back in the hall in front of Toran, Fish-chan looking no different and Sirius out of his punk-goth garb and into that of a British prince of the Middle Ages.

"I want my clothes back..." Sirius moaned.

"No, the King like things old fashioned," Toran explained.

"Don't you think it is a little bit too old fashioned?"

"Hey, you are the one with the strange clothes," Toran said as he shoved Fish-chan and Sirius into a large room. It was about two stories tall and was lavishly decorated in fabrics of royal purple, aureate yellow and elegant sapphire.

"Shh... we have to sneak up on him," Fish-chan said as she tip-toed behind a column. Sirius followed her and they slowly made their way up to behind the throne, where Fish-chan's step-father sat proudly on his golden seat, inspecting his brown beard in a hand mirror.

"That blasted assistant said I was going to have an audience with someone, but no one has shown up," he muttered. As soon as the King put down the mirror, Fish-chan jumped out from behind the throne.

"Surprise!" she cried. Her step-father jumped when she leapt in front of him. He jumped again when he looked to the side and saw Sirius standing there a bit nervous about what to do.

"W-W-Who are you?" the King stuttered at Sirius.

"Sirius Black."

"Why are you here?" he asked with more composure.

"I came with your step-daughter."

"Why should I believe you?"

"Take that up with her," Sirius said, pointing at Fish-chan. The King looked over at Fish-chan and winced.

"You aren't here to hex me, are you?" he whimpered.

"No, now why would you think that?"

"You are one of those magic users. Magic users use magic on non-magic users."

"I promised Mother I wouldn't..."

"Eeeeeiik! Stay away!" the King squealed, cowering in his seat. Sirius went over to Fish-chan and whispered gently in her ear.

"What is up with him?"

"Oh," Fish-chan whispered back. "I accidently cursed him when I first started learning magic and so he's been afraid of me ever since."

"Why not your sister or brother?"

"Don't know," Fish-chan replied. Both her and Sirius knew it would be a long stay at Herfamiffapolous...

Nez: Alright, for those of you who might be scratching their heads in confuzzlement -Zan scratches head- on what in the hell is going on, here's the scoop:

1. Fish's mother remarried after Fish's dad died in the fic. This is how Rose is a princess and Fish is not.

2. The last time Sirius met Fish-chan's sister Rose (who I could not fit in here), he thought it was Fish and well... you get the idea. For further reference, see Fish-chan and Nehszriah Meet the Maraurders Part Seventeen.

3. Yes, the King is paranoid beyond all reason.

4. Yes, those were Carl-kun and Toran's characters in there, just being there. Toran's messing with Sirius and Carl-kun's stalking them.

5. No, I will not do the Hokey-Pokey.

6. Aureate came up as a synonym for "golden".

Zan: -mutters- Hokey Pokey... you nutcase...

Nez: Right, now I am off to write the ides of the fiction. Until later!