Karaoke, Yes, Karaoke
If you want to read a good, quality story that follows the plot of the Naruto manga and/or anime in which all the characters are in character and doing nothing outside of their ordinary behavior, and are offended by such things, hit the back button and continue browsing This story is not supposed to make any sense, many characters are OOC, and the only reference for time is some time during the chuunin exams just so everyone is alive and the Sand people are there () Well, neways, if you're still here, please read on!
Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto, if I did, I wouldn't be writing fanfiction, I would be airing them as episodes
It was storming in Konoha.
Really storming.
Like, monsoon season storming.
Okay, yeah, you get the idea.
That's why everyone happened to be gathered in a plot-convenient club/bar/ramen stand thing, patiently, er, not-so-patiently awaiting the end of the rain. By everyone, meaning Team 7, 8, 10, Neji's team (someone please tell me their number…), three sand siblings, the teachers, and some chuunin examiners, and so on and so forth. It is very improbable that they could all be stuck together in a moderately enclosed space without killing each other, but this isn't a probable story.
And there's the setting for our story, sit back and enjoy.
Maito Gai was not one to sit around, period. It made it more depressing to see all the youths here in this club, sitting gloomily around like old people. Now some old people are interesting, take Third Hokage for instance, but they were sitting around like boring old people. Even his prize pupil Rock Lee seemed to be wilting…
He would not stand for this!!
He stood up suddenly, fire burning in his eyes. The passionate flame of youth would not be wasted!! He would make sure this club would be a jumping hotbed of passion (o.o;;), mark his words!! If he succeeded, he would in some strange way outshine his supreme rival Kakashi, who was at the moment calmly reading the newest issue of Come Come Paradise, and make the score 52:49, him being 52, of course. If he failed, well he would run 100 laps around Konoha, in this weather!! Yosh!!
Asuma, lighting another cig, nudged Kakashi. "He's going at it again…"
"Hm?" Kakshi grunted, not really paying attention to anything but the hot and heavy pages of his novel.
Asuma sighed and went back to smoking, and inside secretly relishing the picture of dripping wet Kurenai running in earlier that afternoon.
Gai was unaware of all this and was eagerly scanning the bar for something that would light the flame of youth and passion. Drinks? Too young, but maybe if times got desperate. Ramen? Nah, maybe start the spiky-haired blond on Kakashi's team, but probably no one else. Yay, DDR machine in the corner!! No, it was broken…
Then came divine intervention.
It seemed a ray of light pierced through the ceiling and alighted on the stage, upon which sat…could it be true?! A KARAOKE MACHINE!!!
Of course! Nothing got the party started like Karaoke, because fun always followed karaoke, especially drunk karaoke, but he'd just have to settle for the normal kind. Kakashi my rival, I have outsmarted you again!
Nevermind the fact Kakashi was never involved in this in the first place.
Sakura was bored, as was half or more of the people in the room. You may ask, why start with Sakura? Well, because she's the easiest character to write in Team 7 which is the basic centerfold of the whole series.
Back to the point, Sakura was bored.
It wasn't very fun watching Naruto slurp down ramen with the etiquette of a rabid hippo, and even though she adored Sasuke and all, it wasn't much fun watching him brood in the same position for more than ten minutes either, because, believe it or not ladies and gentlemen, she does have depth!!!
So an analytical mind like hers found itself bored out of its little analytical self when…
"HELLO YOUTHS OF KONOHA AND ALL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Shocked, annoyed, all eyes shot to the stage where Gai was doing his classic nice guy pose and shouting into a microphone. More or less the thoughts of everyone in the club:
Dear Lords, what now?!
Gai took no notice of the stares and glares and continued with his pep talk. "I hate to see the flame of youth squandered!! It pains me to see all of you sit here in boredom!! IT'S AGONIZING!!"
"FORGIVE US GAI SENSEI!!!!!!!!!"
Another resonant yell from the crowd, coming from none other than Rock Lee, standing straight up, eyes tearing devotion and watering, pleading forgiveness. Behind him, Tenten was seen covering her face in her hands, and Neji quickly downing a pint of some unknown liquid…or liquor.
Gai shot a thumbs-up at Lee and continued. "So I, the marvelous number one jounin in Konoha, have decided to help you rekindle your passion and regain your youthful vigor!! I have convinced the owner of this wonderful club to let us use his Karaoke machine as much as we desire to!! AND!!! We can clear all the center tables to form a dance floor!!! So children, adolescents, my fellow jounins!! PAR-TAY!!"
Crickets chirped in the background as everyone looked on in stunned silence. Gai, feeling his work was done, pranced off the stage and shot an imperious look at Kakashi, who shrugged and went back to reading. Gai tripped. Ahh, my rival, you out do me again!! You're just so cool…
"Tch," Temari scoffed, even though inside she wanted to get on that stage with a burning passion. "Who would ever degrade themselves by going up there and singing to this crowd? They'd be laughed at the rest of the Chuunin Exam…"
Gaara said nothing, as usual, and sat their brooding, not unlike Sasuke, though his pattern of thought was slightly more destructive and involved a lot more contemplative killing than angsting about his dark and traumatizing past. Kankuro was eyeing the machine testily, like someone might eye the last slice of pizza at 4 a.m. in the morning.
Meeanwhile, Sakura was getting nervous because Naruto had that glint in his eye. He wasn't actually going to…
Her suspicions were confirmed when he got up.
"Naruto!" she hissed. "Don't go make a fool of yourself!! You'll make me and Sasuke look bad!!"
"Don't worry Sakura-chan!!" he said, with his trademark foxy grin, before darting off. She groaned and tried to sink into her chair. Sasuke did nothing, but she could vaguely see a vein pop in his forehead.
Naruto, meanwhile, made his way across the tables over to Team 8. Leaning down, he nudged Kiba and whispered something in his ear, while Hinata blushed that her crush was so close to her, and Shino…sat there like a log. Because that's what Shino does in these situations.
After hearing the whispered message, Kiba's face broke out in a wicked smile and he nodded at the blonde, before getting up and following him behind the stage.
A few moments later music began to pound through the club, along with familiar voices.
"Peace up, A-Town down!"
"/Yeah (yeahh!!) okay (okay!!)/"
"Oh my God!!!" Sakura moaned, mortified. Naruto walked on stage, an oversized jersey over his orange suit and a bunch of fake chains around his neck. A backwards baseball cap was pulled over his hair, and he was smiling shamelessly. Then again, it was funny, because she had never seen Sasuke look so utterly stunned before.
"Naruto (Naruto Naruto Naruto..)"
"/Kiba!!/"
"I-i-is that K-Kiba-kun?!" Hinata looked about ready to go into shock. Shino nodded, but other than that, gave no sign of what he was thinking. On a probable guess, it's something along the lines of 'what the hell does that idiot think he's doing?!'
Kiba was dressed in costume as well, in his already oversized hoodie, tilted cap, fake 'bling-bling', and really baggy pants, though Akamaru kinda' ruined the effect by popping out of his hood. He even winked at her!
"Yeah (yeah) yeah (yeah) yeah (yeah) yeah yeah(yeah) yeah (yeah) yeah (yeah) yeah!"
You complete dobe!!! Sasuke thought, his mouth slightly hanging open. You are going to ruin our image!!…then again…that song is kinda catchy…
Naruto smiled and started pulling off some killer dance moves, just like Usher in the video. Where he saw it, I don't know, how he copied it, I really don't know. Then he began singing the first verse, Kiba doing the background, jumping around like a monkey on crack.
"Up in the club wit my homies, trying to get a lil V-I Keep it down on the low key"
"/low key/"
"You should know how it feels"
"/hey!! hey!!/"
"I seen shorty she was checking up on me From the game she was spitting in my earYou would think that she knew me"
"/knew me/"
"These lyrics make no sense," Shikamaru grumbled. "If he was going to make a fool of himself he should've at least chosen a song that makes sense…"
"Yeah, of course," Ino agreed, desperately trying to stifle the urge to get on the improvised dance floor.
"I decided to cheat"
"/okay!!/"
"Conversation got heavy"
"/hey!!/"
"She had me feeling like she's ready to blow"
"/watch out!!/"
"Oh!"
"/watch out!!/"
"She's saying 'come get me'!"
"/come get me!/"
With these lines he crooked a finger over in Sakura's direction and winked, to which she replied with a blush and a glare, and to which Sasuke replied with an uncharacteristic jealous glower.
"So I got up and followed her to the floor She said baby 'let's go' When I told her"
"/let's go!!/"
"I said"
"/Yeah!/"
"Yeahyeah Shorty got down on me, said come and get me!"
"/yeah!/"
"Yeahyeah I got so caught up, I forgot she told me"
"/yeah!/"
"Yeahyeah Covering my girl, she be the best up on me"
"/yeah!!/"
"Yeahyeah Next thing I knew, she was all up on me screaming"
"(Yeah!!) yeah yeah (yeah!) yeah yeah yeah!(Yeah!!) yeah yeah (yeah!) yeah yeah - yeah!"
Though as dorky as it may have looked, it seemed Naruto's and Kiba's performance was starting to loosen things up a bit. Feet were tapping and some were mouthing the words. Then Sakura shot a glance at Ino, and the blonde met her gaze. They both knew what they wanted to do. All hell was going to break loose sooner or later, so why not. They both got up and walked over to the dance floor as Naruto started the second verse.
"She's all up in my head now Got me thinking that it might Be a good idea to take her with meCause she's ready to leave"
"/ready to leeeeaaavvee/ let's go!!/"
Most boys in the club gaped as Sakura and Ino 'broke it down' on the dance floor. Who knew they could be so…wild? Head tossing, butt-shaking, body twisting, hips gyrating, yep, hell had definitely broken loose…and it was very sexy.
"/And I got to keep it real now/ Cause on a 1 to 10, she's a certified 20/ But that's just ain't me/"
"/hey!!/"
"Cause I don't know if I take that chance She swears he's gonna leave"
With that Naruto jumped off the stage and walked in between the two ladies and in front of them, Kiba still in the background. He was probably the luckiest guy in the whole club, but if he was elated out of his mind, he had amazing self-control at the moment.
"But what I do know, is the way she dance Make shorty alright wit me The way's she's Getting Low!! I'm like yeah, just work that out for me"
The girls were falling into a pattern behind him, like backup dancers. Sakura broke away and leaned her arm against his shoulder, winking at him. Naruto faced her as he sang the next words.
"She asks for one more dance, and I'm like yeah How the hell am I supposed to leave?"
"/let's go!!!/"
Sakura turned away with a play toss of her head and stalked back to Ino's side to continue dancing. Naruto's eyes followed her.
"And I say"
"/Yeah!/"
"Yeahyeah Shorty got down on me, said come and get me!"
"/yeah!/"
"Yeahyeah I got so caught up, I forgot she told me"
"/yeah!/"
"Yeahyeah Covering my girl, she be the best up on me"
"/yeah!!/"
"Yeahyeah Next thing I knew, she was all up on me screaming"
"(Yeah!!) yeah yeah (yeah!) yeah yeah - yeah! (Yeah!!) yeah yeah (yeah!) (Hey hey heyyyy!!!! Luda!!!) Yeah yeah - yeah!"
Who would sing the next part? Everyone looked around to see who was missing, then the lights dimmed and spotlights beamed on the stage and who was standing there…Sasuke!!
He hadn't bothered for a costume change but he still looked sexy (drool). Giving a smirk, he jumped off the stage mimicking Naruto, then walked up to him, giving him an imperious side-glance.
"Watch out, my outfit's re-di-culous In the club looking so conspicuous And RAWR!! These women all on the prowl If you hold the head steady, I'm a milk the cow"
"His lyrics make even less sense than Naruto's," Shikamaru complained. He was a bit jealous, but of course, lil' Shika would never admit it. Chouji looked at him sympathetically.
"And forget about game, I'm a spit the truth!"
With a head motion, both Ino and Sakura started dancing closer to him, rubbing their bodies against him and not minding in the least.
"I won't stop till I get em in their birthday suits!! So gimme the rhythm and it'll be off wit their clothes Then "bend over to the front! and touch your toes!"
"Look at them, they might as well just lie at hid feet and scream 'take me!'" Tenten said, denying the fact that she wanted to be in their position to save face.
"Hm?" Neji replied, eyes trained on the performance. "Yeah, shameful…"
"Perv," she muttered. "At least you're not using Byakugan."
"Hmm, didn't think of that."
"Neji!!"
"I - left the Jag I took the Rolls If they ain't cutting then I put em on foot patrollll (oww!!) How ya like me now? When my pinky's baguette over three hundred thou-sand! Let's drink, you the one to please Sasuke fill cups like double D's Me and Naru' once more, and we leaves em dead We want a lady in the street, but a freak in the bed that say"
"/Yeah!/"
"Yeahyeah Shorty got down on me, said come and get me!"
"/yeah!/"
"Yeahyeah I got so caught up, I forgot she told me"
"/yeah!/"
"Yeahyeah Covering my girl, she be the best up on me"
"/yeah!!/"
"Yeahyeah Next thing I knew, she was all up on me screaming"
"(Yeah!!) yeah yeah (yeah!) yeah yeah - yeah! (Yeah!!) yeah yeah (yeah!) (Hey hey heyyyy!!!! Luda!!!) Yeah yeah - yeah!"
The all three boys moved to the front, Sasuke taking the head place with Ino and Sakura on either arm.
"Take that and rewind it back Kiba got the beat that make your booty go (smack)"
Kiba came to the front, did a little dancing, then moved back.
"Take that, rewind it back Naruto got the voice make your booty go (smack)"
Naruto came to the front and pulled another one of his dance moves, then grinned at the audience and tipped his hat.
" Take that, rewind it back Sasuke got the flow to make your booty go (smack)"
Sasuke winked at the audience and continued
"Take that, rewind it back Kiba got the beat that make your booty go (smack)"
The song ended. There was silence for while, then everyone erupted into applause. The performers bowed and returned to their seats.
"You have quite…dynamic students Kakashi," Kurenai said, a shocked look on her face.
"Kiba was up there too, Kurenai…" Asuma laughed. "And that boy cannot dance."
"Well, at least my student wasn't acting like a harem dancer."
"Now, now," Kakashi spoke, his eyes crinkling into a smile. "It was good, neh?"
"Yeah, I suppose…"
Meanwhile, Gai was fuming. He had started the whole thing and it was Kakashi's students that stole the spotlight. He was just to good!
He renewed the fire in his eyes. Next song would be his team, he was sure of it!! For it was still storming outside, and who knew how long it would last. But now, no one was bored.
Yay, it's finished. Like it, hate it? Please review! This is a new style for me and constructive criticism is appreciated Also, opinions on who should sing next or songs you would like to see Couples are pretty loose, lol, so don't get offended by the Naruto/Sakura/Sasuke earlier, it was show :P Sry if Gai is too out of character, or anyone else for that matter, but this fic isn't supposed to make sense, again…
Till next time, Ja Ne!