Landing in London 4
by Athena13

Author Notes: thanks everyone for the encouragement. Especially PCGirl whose own fic I love!

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Last night I was blown away
I said a million things I'd never say
I was knocked right down, it got to me
Gonna get me some of your chemistry
You want me to promise you
That everything is true
"Promises" by Def Leppard
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Then
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London, England

Natalie Vega was one of the few people grateful for the cold winter. Swollen was the word she used to describe her second trimester. It seemed as if the very day it started everything began to pop. From her breasts to her stomach. But she could hide it under thick winter outerwear and pretend, for a while, she didn't have big decisions to make about the baby's father.

She'd had another letter delivered in the post that day. She was doing what she always did when she got a letter from John - she went to the coffee shop down the road from her father's townhouse and sat amongst strangers - tourists and city workers - and read the letter while sipping tea and eating toast.

The letters reminded her of the John she knew for a brief time before Cris came back. Not that he opened himself up to her as much as he was in these letters, but at least in his eyes she could see what he was thinking and feeling. Not like lately, since the secret, when his eyes and expression were blank. It had been jarring to see him look at her like that most of the time. But now, she had his letters.

The first had come almost a month after she left Llanview and one came every couple of weeks. She never answered them, but she read them all. At first, she was reading to try and understand how he could have done what he did to Cris. Now, she was looking forward to learning things about John she'd never known. Like about how he felt when his father had died or how terrified he was when he found her in his bed with the bomb strapped to her body.

He never wrote the L-word, but it seemed to be there between every line. Like it used to be in his eyes when he looked at her.

Today's letter was about the summer he spent life guarding in Asbury Park. About steak sandwiches, sunburn and the families he watched enjoying their time together on the beach.

Unconsciously, Natalie's hand moved to rest on her gently rounded stomach as she read about John's feelings about family. When she was finished with the letter she folded it up and put it back into the envelope. With a pensive look on her face she poured herself another cup of tea.

"Is this seat taken?"

Natalie looked up to find a gorgeous looking Puerto Rican man about her age with his hand on the chair across from her.

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Now
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Angel Square Diner

"I'm glad you came to visit me, Hija," Carlotta held Natalie's hands across the small diner table. It was the lull between the lunch and dinner crowd and they were alone.

"Me too." Natalie's smile was bittersweet. "I should have come sooner, but I didn't know if you'd want to see me."

"Perhaps I didn't know what to say either. But I don't doubt that you loved my Cristian." Carlotta's eyes were sad.

"I do love, Cristian, but I..." Natalie broke off, uncertain of what she should and could say to this woman.

"But you have your child to think of now and John McBain is that child's father," Carlotta finished for her.

"Have you talked to him?"

"Yes. A few times. He came to see me right away and I tossed him out. He kept coming back. Now, he comes to see me every week or so to check on me. I guess I've become some sort of obligation. That man does not travel light."

"Have you forgiven him?"

"Yes. I have. My God would not have it any other way. That's not to say it was easy. He tried to do the right thing. He was not the person who took Cristian and sentenced him to this end."

Natalie shrugged, keeping her eyes on their entwined hands.

"Talk to me," Carlotta urged.

"Sometimes I think I've forgiven him, but then I think of Cris and what he must have." She broke off and looked at Carlotta. At Carlotta's nod she continued. "When I think of Cris and what he must have felt I get so angry at John."

"You're afraid to let it go because you think it means you've forgotten about Cris."

Natalie smiled wryly and squeezed Carlotta's hand. "And I've been paying a therapist to tell me that."

"You'll get it in your own time. Just know that I just want you to be happy. And I would love it if I could consider this child my grand?"

"Son. It's a boy."

"When are you due?"

"June 1st." Natalie smiled and shrugged.

Carlotta opened her mouth to speak, but before a sound came out there was a crash of something coming through the front window of the diner. Then another.

"Get down," Natalie yelled and pulled Carlotta with her to the floor.

"I'm going to go see what that was." Carlotta whispered.

"Be careful." Natalie pulled at her purse which she had placed on the floor under the table and slid it towards her. She opened it and pulled out her cell phone and dialed 911. She didn't see the smoke beginning to creep towards around her.

"There's fire!" Carlotta rushed back, no longer ducking and pulled Natalie to her feet and grabbed the cell phone.

"There's a fire. Someone threw something through the front windows. We're going to go out the back." Carlotta pulled Natalie with her towards the kitchen where she told the cook what was going on.

"It's stuck!" the cook called out as he tried to force the back door open.

"The back door is blocked!" Carlotta cried into the phone. Smoke was starting to pour into the kitchen and the glow of flames were reflecting on the round window of the kitchen door.

The cook grabbed a fire extinguisher and started smashing it against the door. It didn't budge.

Carlotta handed Natalie the telephone and began to gather rags, wet them in the sink and put them under the swinging kitchen door. Her efforts only minimally successful in blocking the smoke.

Natalie began to feel a tickle in her throat and panic began to set in.

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"McBain," John said distractedly into the telephone.

"There's been a fire bomb at the Diner. Natalie is in their with my mother. The 911 operator said they're trapped."

John dropped the phone and the file he was reading on his desk and ran out.

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Natalie and Carlotta were crouched down on the right side of the door. The cook on the left. The firemen were on the other side and had warned them to step aside. All of the occupants were holding wet clothes over their noses and mouths. Natalie had her free hand entwined with Carlotta's and on her stomach. Tears were streaming from their smoke irritated eyes.

Flames had plowed through the kitchen door and were edging towards them.

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John stood pacing around Antonio who stood perfectly still next to Bo outside the Diner. They were watching the fireman ram the door which had obviously been tampered with to trap the occupants inside with the fire. Ambulances and paramedics stood on the ready.

John kept stroking his hand down the back of his hair as he paced, feeling helpless as Natalie and their baby were trapped inside. They still had the cell phone connection open, but the fire department had taken over the communications so he didn't even know if they were all right. He had no idea what kind of damage the smoke could do to the baby. He wouldn't let himself think of the alternative.

"What's taking so long." He heard Antonio ask Bo as they waited. John stopped pacing and put his hand on Antonio's shoulder.

Just then the firemen were successful in breaking the door down and they rushed in to gather the occupants and try to get the raging fire under control.

John sprinted towards the door and got there just as Natalie was led out. He slid between everyone else and lifted her off her feet and hurried her to the paramedics.

End - for now.