Hi, I'm back... god knows why... sighs I am nothing, and nothing is complete within itself therefore I don't really need anything I just think that I do... I've forgotten why that is.

Ok, I think my story just gotten worse... I dunno why I'm still writing. And Calicoskies, I do plan to write a shorter story, not fluff or serious but stupid like this one. Just alot shorter and probably a little less stupid. Unfortunately, I wrote a bit of it and it vanished to somewhere... I can't seem to find it.

Chapter 2: My gay pretend boyfriend's back!?

Next morning at school.

"Duck!"

Clark dropped reflectively to the floor as Chloe aimed her water gun at the guy behind him. The high pressure stream of water catching him by surprise as his hand automatically went to cover his face.

Today Chloe was wearing a camouflage, complete with green and brown paint on her face and sticks in her hair, which contrasts completely with the gigantic neon orange and purple water gun she carried. She ceased her attack of water on the defenseless and random guy and hid behind Clark's broad frame.

"Cover me," she whispered.

"You crazy bitch!" the man screamed as the girl hid behind a very confused Clark.

Then out of nowhere Lana jumped up behind the guy and pinned him to the locker door.

"Don't you dare talk to her like that!" she said before pushing his head hard against the metal. Unlike Chloe, she didn't have green paint all over her face, but was wearing a camouflage patterned tank top with over sized army pants and boots. Despite the fact that she was the exact same (short) height she was before, she seemed a lot more intimidating.

"Lana, let the guy go," Clark said as he pat his friend on the back in an attempt to calm her down. The girl dropped the guy and turned to face Clark. She was aiming her bright green and red water gun at him.

"Ok, Lana calm down. Don't do this. Put the water gun down ok? Lex picked out this shirt for me and its dry clean onl-"

The violent sprays of water shot into his chest and Clark can see the brunette smirking at him out of the corner of his wet eyes. Chloe came out from behind Clark and put her arms around Lana causing the girl to stop.

"Clark's a double agent," Chloe whispered too loudly. "He's actually on our side."

Lana nodded, the smirk still on her face as she handed Clark a towel from out of nowhere.

"Thanks," he said as he wiped his face in the fluffy white fabric. He noticed that there was a golden 'LL' imprinted on it. Lana must have stolen it from the Luthor mansion during her sleep over two nights ago.

The boy's super hearing picked up a stunned gasp from the end of the hallway and when he turned to look, the crowd was parting almost in slow motion.

The crowd parted into two sides as a man walked down the hallway. His stride confident and his shiny shoes clicked against the floor. His badge gleamed against his navy uniform as he made his way towards them.

Lana's dark eyes brightened as she started running towards him. Seeing his bright blue eyes brighten as she came near.

"WHITNEY!!!" Lana screamed as she tackled him to the ground.

"Ow!" he exclaimed as his head hit the floor.

"Sorry," Lana said against his cheeks. "I just really missed you," she said as she gave him a peck on the cheek. Whitney gave her a smile that could have competed with Clark's in its literally blinding brightness.

"You look beautiful," he said as he leaned into her and sniffed. He didn't pull away until Lana was sure all the air around her neck had been sucked away. The blond soldier then gave a huge sigh.

"Did you know I was coming?" he asked as he noticed her outfit.

Lana smiled, 'how typically Whitey to ask about her outfit first...the sniffing was probably just a part of the act they had', she thought as she put his behavior to the back of her mind.

"No, I was just playing water war with Chloe," Lana said as she gestured over to the now pouting girl covered in camouflage. "You were missing in action Whit, no one really expected you to be back, especially not so soon. I didn't even start on my denial phase yet. I'm so glad you're here."

Whitney fixed his pale blue eyes on the brunette's tank top. They were so intense that Lana unconsciously rubbed against her top to see if there were holes burnt into it. The girl looked back at her pretend ex boyfriend strangely.

"What's up with you?" she asked as she got up off the floor, giving Whitney a hand.

"Nothing Lana, nothing at all. I just never want to leave you ever again" he answered as he kissed he offered hand. If he noticed her shudder, he didn't show it.

"So..." The silence hangs in the air like a wrecking ball above them as Lana looked away from the blue eyes of the person she used to be so comfortable with. The 'couple' was now at the Fordmans' and the girl was staring blankly at the plate of sugar cookies.

"It's so nice to have everything back to normal" Mrs. Fordman said as she entered the room with two glasses of milk. "My son and the prettiest girl in school, nothing queer here at all. Everything is back to how it was suppose to be, everything completely straightened out."

"Yeah sure," Lana replied with the fakest smile in the history of the universe. The brunette always knew what her friend's mum is like but that doesn't mean she isn't bothered by it. Mrs. Fordman knew that her son is gay, but she just refuses to acknowledge it, tried everyway she can to make him suppress it. At first Lana had thought it was because she was afraid Whitney's violently homophobic father would hurt Whitney, but now...

Whitney just gave her an idiotic smile, like he didn't even notice. Lana couldn't stand it anymore.

"Mrs. Fordman I know you miss your son but could we have some alone time for a moment please. I promise I won't do anything."

"Of course dear, oh how silly of me, you young lovebirds would want to spend some alone time together, that's a perfectly normal thing to want." the woman said as she placed the milk on the table and walked out.

"Whitney what's wrong with you?" Lana asked the moment Mrs. Fordman was out of earshot.

"What do you mean Lana?"

"You've been acting very different from before. I'm your best friend, I know you more than anyone ever did. What happened out there?"

The love sick puppy eyes disappeared form his face, replaced with a more serious expression.

"Well Lana, you see um... Actually I don't remember anything at all. I woke up at the hospital and everyone filled me in on everything but I don't actually remember any of it. The only surviving memory is that of your angelic face and I knew you were the one I love the most. I came back hoping that you would help me remember everything and then we could start a new future together. Just you and me, we'd be so happy together."

Lana suppressed the urge to puke.

"So I have to go get ready for your party soon. Would you like the help me pick an outfit?"

Whitney simply looked confused for a moment, and then he stood up, moving in close, his body towering over her small build. Before Lana can registered what was happening, Whitney kissed her.

"mmmph," the sound escaped from the girl's lips, before she pushed him away.

"I'm sorry Whitney, but I can't do this."

"I'm sorry, this must be so sudden for you. It's ok, I can wait, I can wait forever for you."

"Right, well I have to go get dressed now, see you at the party," she said before practically running out of the place and gagging.

The back room of the Talon was quiet compared to the bustling outside, a place for privacy as the waiters and waitresses decorated the Egyptian/Assyrian walls with glittering lights and giant banners. Quiet that is, until Chloe opened her mouth.

"What?! But that is not possible!" Chloe screamed in outrage, there was a hint of a fake Russian accent in her voice. "A gay man doesn't just become straight. It's defying the laws of gayness everywhere."

Lana sighed as she looked Chloe who had a curly red haired wig on her head resulting in her looking like a deranged doll.

Lana and Chloe are both dressed in pleated plaid skirts which reminded Lana of the Sailor Senshi outfit they once wore except the skirt seemed even shorter if that was even possible. The white cotton shirt, though not as tight as before, was made of a much thinner material, resulting in an almost clear view of both the girl's bras.

Lana looked appreciatively at Chloe's red lacy ones and was glad for her lover's t.A.T.u. obsessed phase. She didn't even mind cutting her hair short to resemble that of Lena what'shername.

"Lena, are you listening to me?"

"Oh, um yeah. Defying the physics of gayness, I'm listening," Lana said, repeating the only part of Chloe's speech she heard.

"So how do you suppose it happened?"

"I don't think he's turned straight really. I just think he simply…Forgot that he's gay. I mean he said he doesn't remember anyone else but me, that's probably only cause I'm his best friend. Something really terrible must have happened to him if he can't even remember Clark who he claimed was 'the love of his life'."

Chloe nodded in agreement. "So what should we do?"

"I dunno, remind him I suppose."

"So are you going to tell him?...About us?" There were hints of insecurity in Chloe's voice.

"Of course we will C'lo. We'll tell him when he arrives at the party, and then reintroduce him to Clark. Maybe that will jog his memories" she said before pulling Chloe down onto her lap and kissing her nose affectionately. "Now, stop worrying about such trivial matters. We have more pressing issues to attend to" she emphasized this point by pressing her erection against Chloe's cheeks.

The girl smiled back deviously, "I thought we had a party to plan."

Lana just smiled at her before catching her lips between her own, tasting Chloe's cotton candy lip balm as she sucked on the shiny pink lips and bit on them playfully before opening her mouth to Chloe's sharp tongue, licking at her teeth and sucking her mouth like it was the most delicious thing in the world.

Black nails scraped over Chloe's pale skin as Lana slipped her hand inside her shirt to cup her breast, squeezing them, rubbing them before slipping inside the red laced bra to pinch at her left nipple. Chloe's moan was stolen from her by Lana's lips.

"You're so beautiful," Lana whispered to her, her voice husky and deep and it caressed Chloe like silk, her breath hot and Chloe couldn't help thrusting up against her lover. Lana moved her lips onto Chloe's neck, leaving suck and bite marks on them, wishing they would stay on her forever. Mark Chloe as hers forever.

Lana's other hand moved up pale thighs, urging them to spread apart before she slipped her hand under pleated skirt. Her touch was feather light when it reached the lacy fabric beneath, the material becoming wetter by the second.

Chloe's moan was muffled again, this time by a strange noise coming from the pipes, but neither of the girls took notice as they continue to fondle each other. Lana's erection was tenting the skirt she wore as Chloe rubbed against it, the friction causing Lana to throw her head back in pleasure as Chloe's hand stared to message her breasts.

The fabric of Chloe's underwear was now slick and thin with moisture as Lana's own stretched against the long length. Chloe slipped Lana's black lace down to her knees as Lana's fingers slipped inside her underwear to play with the blond curls there. Her finger pressed into Chloe's heated wet passage as Chloe's fingers played with the slit on her uncut cock. Lana hissed in response, her own fingers thrusting deeper inside her lover before pulling out, then in again.

As Chloe's hand wrap around Lana's length, she felt something wet touching her leg, but by that point she was too horny to care. She smirked as Lana murmured her name, begging her as she pumped the weeping erection.

The cool wet surface that touched Chloe's legs began climbing up her leg slowly. Almost seductively as she thrusts against Lana's fingers. It was up to her thigh before Chloe noticed it and froze.

Noticing the horrified look on Chloe's face, Lana became concern, but before she can ask, the wetness began rubbing against her bare legs.

Lana looked down to see that it was water. A huge puddle of water.

And it was molesting her.

Chloe screamed as the water puddle moved up to her panties and seeped inside it. The water was doing the same to Lana but she didn't care, anger was boiling inside her. It was directed at this liquid fiend as it touched Chloe. Her Chloe.

Pissing Lana Lang off was never a good idea, and to say that this thing was pissing her off would be an understatement of the century.

"I'll be back Chloe" she said in Terminator fashion before bursting out the door.

The water was soaking through the brunette's thin white shirt now and the waiters and some patrons were staring pointedly at her breasts but she didn't care as she quickly ran up to the office.

"I knew I kept one here somewhere," she mumbled as she emptied the contents of the drawers there. After the office was properly trashed, she found what she was looking for.

A hair dryer.

With the weapon in hand, she ran back downstairs, ignoring the strange looks everyone was giving her as she plugged the hair dryer in. She held the hair dryer like she would a pistol and kicked the door in.

Chloe was choking on water as it held her hostage. It was clinging onto her body like a giant leech as she frantically flapped her arms like a drowning dog. Her red wig was soaking wet as her skirt rippled underneath the water showing off red panties.

The heated wind was put on full scale as Lana aimed her weapon against the liquid covering her girlfriend's mouth. After a few seconds it let her mouth go and Chloe sputtered out the water.

Lana aimed the hair dryer lower to chase the water away, but the moment she moved the weapon somewhere else, the water moved back to covering Chloe's mouth.

After half an hour of blowing at the water (luckily the creature didn't cover Chloe's nose) the creature got irritated and let go of Chloe. The girl ran over to her girlfriend's side and as they both held each other the creature morphed itself into a big wave.

Lana blew hot wind at it but it didn't work. The creature charged, coming at them like a giant predator opening its mouth to devour their prey.

Cold water washed over the two girls as they clung to each other. Hair dryer was knocked right out of Lana's hand as it short circuited in the water. The girl edged to the opposite end of the room as blue sparks flew. The girls stood up on a plastic table as the creature twisted and turn as electric currents ran through its watery body.

Eventually, the creature dropped to the ground, its watery contents flooding the room.

Cautiously Lana stepped down from the table. The water rippled around her Docs as she treads on it carefully. Once she was in the middle of the room, she thumped her feet against the floor hard, casing the water to splash up before gravity overcame it and it dropped back to the flooded floor.

After making sure that it was safe, the brunette extended her hand to help her counterpart down.

"You alright?" Lana asked as the taller girl, who was now hugging her tightly. The girl nodded against her breasts before Lana lead them towards the door.

Just as Lana's hand reached the knob, Chloe's feet got caught.

The girl screamed as she tried to get away from the hand that held onto her, but it was useless. The dihydrogen monoxide creature just held her ankle tighter as Lana used all of her strength to keep Chloe from being dragged back into the liquid.

Chloe had never liked tug of war as a child, now she positively hated it as she groped for Lana, her nails digging into the other girl's perfect skin but it didn't matter now as the wetness crept up her legs again.

Lana pulled hard against the fiend, not noticing that it had come up behind her. Luckily Chloe did and tried to give a signal. Lana's face simply scrunched up at Chloe's strange facial expression.

"What?" she asked as she turned around.

But it was too late; the creature had already formed another wave, bigger this time as it knocked the girl off her feet.

The creature had morphed once again to form a large fish tank with the girls swimming inside it. The water pressure was increasing around them, keeping them inside it as they struggled to get away.

Chloe felt something inside the water. It was invisible but obviously hard, long and definitely phallic. The girl grabbed it tightly and squeezed it as hard as she could. The shriek vibrated through the water as her finger tips claw at it until she felt something like skin underneath her nails.

Once the creature lowers its hold on her, Chloe swam for it. Her body shot out of the water and onto the floor in a thud. Luckily, it was her arms and not her head that hit the ground. Spitting out the water she scrambled up off the floor, turning back to see Lana gesturing wildly at her purse at the end of the room.

See that the water thing was starting to come after her again, she grabbed it and ran out of the room.

"Chloe what happened?" one of the waitress asked but the girl didn't even notice her as she found the nearest table and poured out all the contents of the purse. A ridicules amount of stuff came tumbling out from inside the small container. From everyday objects such as combs and pens to long heavy chains and mousetraps. The things piled itself up on the table, at least 50 of it consisting of candy wrappers that Lana had eaten and forgotten to thrown away.

Finally the last piece fell onto the pile. It was a miniature cell phone, barely visible among the mess in front of her. On the back of it read In case of emergency dial 5.

The girl did as instructed and waited for it to be picked up.

"Hello," Clark's voice sounded at the other end. He sounded as if he'd run a marathon across the continent.

"Clark! You have to come to the Talon now!"

"Not now Lex." Chloe rolled her eyes as she heard the guy moan. "CLARK STOP FUCKING AND GET YOUR ASS OVER TO THE TALON NOW!!!"

"Yeah, coming Chloe," he said, there were sounds of clothes ruffling in the background.

"And it's not Chloe its Julia, Julia Volkava."

Clark knew Chloe well enough that he wasn't surprised. "What's the emergency?"

"There's a mutant attacking. It got my Lena. I managed to escape, but she's still in there, she told me to call you. Hurry Clark, please."

Suddenly there was a gust of wind blowing pass her. She vaguely saw a blur of red and blue.

"Where is it?" Clark asked as Chloe turned around to face him, a confused look on her face.

"I was um... making out with Lex in the car. That's how I got here so quickly. We were parked just around the corner," the teen lied once again, though it was more believable than any of his other lies. Probably another side affect of becoming a Luthor.

"Right," Chloe replied, not commenting on the fact that it was highly unlikely that the two brothers would be getting it on in broad day light in Lex's car in the center of the town in a place like Kansas. They weren't that stupid. The girl didn't comment on it though, it was actually a better excuse than most of the ones she had heard before plus, they have a mutant to diminish.

"Lena's in the backroom, this way," the wigged teen said as she lead to way to the door.

Clark gasped as he saw the aquarium Lana was swimming in, what shocked him was the fact that there were no glass containing the water. In al his years in this town, he'd never seen anything like this. He didn't even notice that Lana was only in her plaid skirt and a lacy black bra.

"Have you tried drying it?" Clark asked.

"Yes, it didn't work."

Clark thought about it for a bit. He considered freezing the thing but Lana was still inside it. It would also be revealing his powers to his friends, putting them in danger and all that other stuff his father had warned him about.

The creature saw that it had more company. It started shifting again as a liquid tentacle moved towards them.

Suddenly, an idea struck Clark and he grabbed Chloe by the hand. He took them both out the door and went behind the counter. As quickly as he could without super speeding he looked through the cabinets underneath it.

"Ah ha!" he said as he got out a crate pull of instant jello.

He took the entire crate back to the back room.

"Chlo- I mean Julia, create a diversion for me."

The girl went up to the creature and got it's tentacles to chase her around as Clark started ripping of the packages and pouring the gelatin into the water.

Eventually Chloe was caught and the thing turned its attention to Clark. By that time the jello was already mixing with the water and Clark started blowing his cool mint breath at the monster. He didn't blow hard enough for it to froze, but it was enough for the jello to start forming, causing the creature to slowing down.

Lana and Chloe had already passed out so Clark super speeded around it till all of it became lime green jello and it stopped moving except to wiggle whenever Clark poked it.

Clark dug the girls out of it and placed them both on the floor. He gave Chloe CPR first. When she was spitting out jelly and finally breathing properly he moved onto Lana.

Suddenly the door burst open. Whitney stood stiffly at the door, his face red with rage.

"Get away from my girl Kent!" He yelled as he pushed Clark out of the way with a force stronger than that of a human being. He picked the near naked and unconcious girl off the floor and glared menacingly at Clark. Then out of nowhere he brought out a large chunk of green rock.

"I know your weakness Kent. Stay away from us."

ThenWhitney produced out of nowhere, a bottle of green spray,then sprayed Clark with it, causing him to fall down onto the floor, clutching his skin in pain

"Lena! No!" Chloe screamed as she jumped onto the blonde's back, trying to get him to let go. He threw her off like brushing lint off a suit.

The blond held Lana tightly as he made his way out the back entrance. Clark weakly focused his eyes, x-raying him only to find his skeleton glowing green.

"Tina Greer," he said .

"Finally figured it out didn't you Clark? Sorry but it's too late, I'm gonna take Lana away to where no one can find her and we'll be together happily ever afte-"

"Hey! Where Are you going with her," another person said as he burst out through the door.

This person was dressed in tight torn jeans, a tight light blue t-shirt and a bomber jacket with a black eye patch over his left eye. He seemed familiar but Clark couldn't really place him and it was rather obvious why. The man's wild dirty blond hair flow down his back as the long beard covered all of his face except for his pink lips and pale blue eyes.

"Wherever the hell I want."

"Not if I can help it," the wild blond man said as he charged towards the imposter. The girl in the body of Whitney pushed him away with forced that caused him to fly up, his body hitting the ceiling before coming down.

"Oh fuck!" the guy said as Chloe was pushed out of the way. When Clark tried to get up and grabbed Tina by the edge of her pants she sprayed him once more.

This time he went out like a light.

TBC

Really lame right? I know, I was as shocked by the lameness as you...