"All's Fair in Love and War"
Chapter Four: "Things aren't what the seem"
By Ann Parker and Whiteowl
The two women sat exhausted in the hole. They had been in there for twenty minutes now. Miss Parker leaned against the wall and slid down to sit. She looked at the other woman.
"You know, for someone that has been here before, you aren't very helpful," she stated bluntly. Sarah glared at her.
"I could have left you with Jareth. Is that what you want? I'll call Jareth and leave you two here alone," Sarah retorted. Miss Parker paled.
"Um...never mind," replied Parker as she stood back up, dusting herself off. Sarah smirked.
"Thought so."
"Still, how do we get out of here!?" she practically yelled. She slammed her fist into the side of the hole, and fell through the wall. Sarah
looked at where Miss Parker had been.
"Damn it! There's another false wall." Sarah strode across to where Parker had been and walked into the wall. A very solid wall. She staggered
backwards, clutching her head. "What the? Parker got through here so what's going on? What are you up to Jareth?" Sarah looked up, fully expecting to see
Jareth above her, smirking. Instead there was nothing but the walls of the Labyrinth. "So you really are going to make this harder aren't you? No help
this time, not that I need it."
Looking around, Miss Parker pushed herself up off the ground. Again. She had fallen flat on her face when the wall in front of her had disappeared.
She was really getting annoyed with this falling business. She looked down at her clothing, which she was sure she was going to have to throw away after
this. They were covered in dirt that appeared to sparkle. In fact everything seemed to sparkle, including the trees of the forest around her.
"What the---?" she cut herself off when she heard rustling noises all around her. Parker jumped back as a pink hand dropped out of a tree in front
of her. She stepped towards it, curious. As she got nearer, Parker instinctively reached for her holster. It was empty. "Damn Jarod." She bent down to
pick up the severed hand.
"Hey lady that's my hand!"
"Yeah! That's his hand!"
Five pink ape-like things dropped from the trees surrounding Parker.
One of them addressed her, "Hey lady you're only allowed to pick up your own hand."
"That's a rule."
"Yeah, now we get to take your hand!"
The five were slowly converging on Parker. "What the HELL are you?" she yelled.
Jarod watched the scene in front of him and gulped. As much has he wanted to "play" with Miss Parker, this was going a little too far. He turned to
Jareth, who seemed quite amused by Miss Parker's predicament. "Isn't this going a little too far?" he asked.
Jareth looked up from the crystal. "I thought you wanted to make things interesting. Sarah dealt with them and more and she survived the experience
without being traumatized. Besides Parker's in no real danger," Jareth raised an eyebrow, "Why are you so concerned?"
Jarod blinked at the question. He never expected the Goblin King to ask that sort of question. "Because I---" Just as Jarod was about to answer a
bullet buzzed over Jareth's head, hitting the vulture in the crown above Jareth's throne.
Jareth jumped and got out his throne, looking at the now dead bird. "Bloody hell! What happened?" He whirled around, glaring at everyone in the
throne room menacingly. The goblins moved about to reveal a small goblin holding a silver gun in his trembling hands. Jarod's eyes grew wide.
"So that's were it went!" he exclaimed, leaping forward and pulling it out of the goblinís hand.
"Give that here," Jareth ordered, taking the gun away from Jarod. He looked disdainfully at the gun in his hand. With a flick of his wrist the gun
disappeared. Jareth turned towards Jarod coolly. "Why, may I ask, did you have a gun?"
"It isn--wasn't mine. I stole it from Miss Parker right before I ended up here. One of the goblins must have picked it up," Jarod replied, not at
all threatened by the glare he was receiving from Jareth. Jareth looked at Jarod for another moment before flopping back into his throne, one leg thrown
over the chair's armrest.
Jareth sighed and looked at Jarod. "If there are any more accidents I'm afraid I'll have to restrict you to more secluded rooms. Do you
understand?"
Jarod simply nodded and sat back down, looking at the crystal with Miss Parker in it. He watched as the fireys tugged and pulled at different parts
of Miss Parker's body. He flinched as they reached for her head. "What exactly are they doing?" he questioned, getting worried for Miss Parker's safety.
Jareth glanced at the crystal, "They're trying to take her head off," he stated, sounding bored.
Jarod's eyes widened at this statement. "What?! Then get her out of there!"
Jareth just looked at him, "And why would I do that? Isn't this interesting enough for you? Or could it be that you care for her?" He flashed
Jarod a condescending grin.
Jarod opened his mouth but decided to shut it. "What fun is it if she gets killed? This isn't what I had in mind when I said 'make things
interesting.'"
At this Jareth raised an eyebrow. "Oh really? Then what did you have in mind?" A sly smile appeared on Jarod's face.
"Well..."
Jareth leaned against a tree, watching the fireys torture Miss Parker. Two of the pink creatures were jumping around her cheering, while the other
three were tugging at her head. "Ay, we got another with a weird head! Was is up with you people?"
Jareth smirked; Miss Parker obviously had her hands full. When she managed to get one of them off, another took his place. All Miss Parker had
really managed to do was rip her skirt further. Jareth sighed, as much as he was enjoying this he had to stop it. He pushed off from the tree, towards the
group.
"Well, what have we here? Enjoying yourself Parker?" He smiled at the fireys, "Having fun?"
"She picked up his hand," one of the fireys whined, "so we getta take something."
"Yeah that's the rules." The fireys started to back away from Parker and Jareth.
"And who makes those rules?" Jareth's eyes narrowed.
The fireys looked at each other blankly. "You?" one of them returned.
"Good," Jareth sneered, "now leave." The fireys scampered away into the trees. Jareth turned to Miss Parker, smiling. "I trust they didn't hurt
you?"
Parker finished dusting herself off, again. She inspected her skirt and groaned. "Damn it! It ripped again! Boy is Jarod going to pay for this!"
Once she was done she finally acknowledged Jareth's presence. She raised an eyebrow, suspicious of the man before her and his cocky grin. "Why do you
care?"
Jareth moved towards Parker until he was right in front of her. "It wouldn't do if you were hurt. What's the fun in that?" He stepped back and
looked Parker over, "Now about that skirt," Jarth's hand lightly brushed the hem of Miss Parker's skirt, "I'm sure a change of clothing could be arranged."
A slight smile appeared on Miss Parker's face. "Possibly."
"Ugh! When I get out of here, I'm going to ram one of those crystals down his throat!" Sarah sat back against the wall of the hole, pouting. She
was thirsty and her fingers were bleeding from trying to climb the walls. Sarah wrapped her arms around her knees. "What's the point of being here, if
I'm stuck in a hole. Is this your idea of revenge? If it is, it stinks." She glared at the wall across from her, half expecting it to respond. When it
didn't she mumbled to herself, "I think I liked the oubliette better."
"That could probably be arranged if you like." Sarah looked up, annoyed.
"Aren't you supposed to be at the castle?" she asked angrily to the man at the top of the hole.
"Well, yes, but I'm not now am I?" Jarod retorted sarcastically, crouching down to peer at Sarah.
"Does Jareth know you're out?" she looked at him skeptically.
"What the Goblin King doesn't know won't hurt him," Jarod replied with a look of mischief on his face.
Sarah laughed. "I like you. But why are you here?" she asked.
"To get you out of this hole." Jarod smiled as he stood up.
"And just how are you planning to do that?"
Jarod smiled and held up a long rope in his right hand. "With this."
~~~~~
Ann Parker: And that is chapter four, everyone! Hope you liked it!
Whiteowl: Yeah, and to those that might be confused. The thing to remember with this chapter is its title: "Things aren't what they seem." And if you
still don't get it, go watch Labryinth again! Heck, even if you do get it go watch it again! *sigh* Jareth...
Ann: -_-** And if you still don't get it, then go watch some episodes of Pretender! *sigh* Jarod...
Whiteowl: Oh I see how it is, you can sigh over your bishie but I can't? Well :p
Ann: Okay, calm down hon. We can both dream about our bishie. Hey, maybe if we think about them long enough they will appear!
Whiteowl: Okay!
*both dream about bishie*
*Jareth and Jarod appear*
Jarod: *looks around confused* What the? How did I get here? This isn't the Centre, is it?
Ann: Nope! *glomps Jarod* You'll be safe here!
Jareth: *looks around annoyed* What is going on? Who are you people and where am I?
Whiteowl: eeee! *glomps Jareth* You've finally came!
*Jarod and Jareth both sweatdrop*
Ann: See, I told you it would work! *Whiteowl nods* Okay, everybody now send us those reviews!! Ja ne!
Whiteowl: Bye! Tune in next time for more episodes of authoresses and bishie.
Chapter Four: "Things aren't what the seem"
By Ann Parker and Whiteowl
The two women sat exhausted in the hole. They had been in there for twenty minutes now. Miss Parker leaned against the wall and slid down to sit. She looked at the other woman.
"You know, for someone that has been here before, you aren't very helpful," she stated bluntly. Sarah glared at her.
"I could have left you with Jareth. Is that what you want? I'll call Jareth and leave you two here alone," Sarah retorted. Miss Parker paled.
"Um...never mind," replied Parker as she stood back up, dusting herself off. Sarah smirked.
"Thought so."
"Still, how do we get out of here!?" she practically yelled. She slammed her fist into the side of the hole, and fell through the wall. Sarah
looked at where Miss Parker had been.
"Damn it! There's another false wall." Sarah strode across to where Parker had been and walked into the wall. A very solid wall. She staggered
backwards, clutching her head. "What the? Parker got through here so what's going on? What are you up to Jareth?" Sarah looked up, fully expecting to see
Jareth above her, smirking. Instead there was nothing but the walls of the Labyrinth. "So you really are going to make this harder aren't you? No help
this time, not that I need it."
Looking around, Miss Parker pushed herself up off the ground. Again. She had fallen flat on her face when the wall in front of her had disappeared.
She was really getting annoyed with this falling business. She looked down at her clothing, which she was sure she was going to have to throw away after
this. They were covered in dirt that appeared to sparkle. In fact everything seemed to sparkle, including the trees of the forest around her.
"What the---?" she cut herself off when she heard rustling noises all around her. Parker jumped back as a pink hand dropped out of a tree in front
of her. She stepped towards it, curious. As she got nearer, Parker instinctively reached for her holster. It was empty. "Damn Jarod." She bent down to
pick up the severed hand.
"Hey lady that's my hand!"
"Yeah! That's his hand!"
Five pink ape-like things dropped from the trees surrounding Parker.
One of them addressed her, "Hey lady you're only allowed to pick up your own hand."
"That's a rule."
"Yeah, now we get to take your hand!"
The five were slowly converging on Parker. "What the HELL are you?" she yelled.
Jarod watched the scene in front of him and gulped. As much has he wanted to "play" with Miss Parker, this was going a little too far. He turned to
Jareth, who seemed quite amused by Miss Parker's predicament. "Isn't this going a little too far?" he asked.
Jareth looked up from the crystal. "I thought you wanted to make things interesting. Sarah dealt with them and more and she survived the experience
without being traumatized. Besides Parker's in no real danger," Jareth raised an eyebrow, "Why are you so concerned?"
Jarod blinked at the question. He never expected the Goblin King to ask that sort of question. "Because I---" Just as Jarod was about to answer a
bullet buzzed over Jareth's head, hitting the vulture in the crown above Jareth's throne.
Jareth jumped and got out his throne, looking at the now dead bird. "Bloody hell! What happened?" He whirled around, glaring at everyone in the
throne room menacingly. The goblins moved about to reveal a small goblin holding a silver gun in his trembling hands. Jarod's eyes grew wide.
"So that's were it went!" he exclaimed, leaping forward and pulling it out of the goblinís hand.
"Give that here," Jareth ordered, taking the gun away from Jarod. He looked disdainfully at the gun in his hand. With a flick of his wrist the gun
disappeared. Jareth turned towards Jarod coolly. "Why, may I ask, did you have a gun?"
"It isn--wasn't mine. I stole it from Miss Parker right before I ended up here. One of the goblins must have picked it up," Jarod replied, not at
all threatened by the glare he was receiving from Jareth. Jareth looked at Jarod for another moment before flopping back into his throne, one leg thrown
over the chair's armrest.
Jareth sighed and looked at Jarod. "If there are any more accidents I'm afraid I'll have to restrict you to more secluded rooms. Do you
understand?"
Jarod simply nodded and sat back down, looking at the crystal with Miss Parker in it. He watched as the fireys tugged and pulled at different parts
of Miss Parker's body. He flinched as they reached for her head. "What exactly are they doing?" he questioned, getting worried for Miss Parker's safety.
Jareth glanced at the crystal, "They're trying to take her head off," he stated, sounding bored.
Jarod's eyes widened at this statement. "What?! Then get her out of there!"
Jareth just looked at him, "And why would I do that? Isn't this interesting enough for you? Or could it be that you care for her?" He flashed
Jarod a condescending grin.
Jarod opened his mouth but decided to shut it. "What fun is it if she gets killed? This isn't what I had in mind when I said 'make things
interesting.'"
At this Jareth raised an eyebrow. "Oh really? Then what did you have in mind?" A sly smile appeared on Jarod's face.
"Well..."
Jareth leaned against a tree, watching the fireys torture Miss Parker. Two of the pink creatures were jumping around her cheering, while the other
three were tugging at her head. "Ay, we got another with a weird head! Was is up with you people?"
Jareth smirked; Miss Parker obviously had her hands full. When she managed to get one of them off, another took his place. All Miss Parker had
really managed to do was rip her skirt further. Jareth sighed, as much as he was enjoying this he had to stop it. He pushed off from the tree, towards the
group.
"Well, what have we here? Enjoying yourself Parker?" He smiled at the fireys, "Having fun?"
"She picked up his hand," one of the fireys whined, "so we getta take something."
"Yeah that's the rules." The fireys started to back away from Parker and Jareth.
"And who makes those rules?" Jareth's eyes narrowed.
The fireys looked at each other blankly. "You?" one of them returned.
"Good," Jareth sneered, "now leave." The fireys scampered away into the trees. Jareth turned to Miss Parker, smiling. "I trust they didn't hurt
you?"
Parker finished dusting herself off, again. She inspected her skirt and groaned. "Damn it! It ripped again! Boy is Jarod going to pay for this!"
Once she was done she finally acknowledged Jareth's presence. She raised an eyebrow, suspicious of the man before her and his cocky grin. "Why do you
care?"
Jareth moved towards Parker until he was right in front of her. "It wouldn't do if you were hurt. What's the fun in that?" He stepped back and
looked Parker over, "Now about that skirt," Jarth's hand lightly brushed the hem of Miss Parker's skirt, "I'm sure a change of clothing could be arranged."
A slight smile appeared on Miss Parker's face. "Possibly."
"Ugh! When I get out of here, I'm going to ram one of those crystals down his throat!" Sarah sat back against the wall of the hole, pouting. She
was thirsty and her fingers were bleeding from trying to climb the walls. Sarah wrapped her arms around her knees. "What's the point of being here, if
I'm stuck in a hole. Is this your idea of revenge? If it is, it stinks." She glared at the wall across from her, half expecting it to respond. When it
didn't she mumbled to herself, "I think I liked the oubliette better."
"That could probably be arranged if you like." Sarah looked up, annoyed.
"Aren't you supposed to be at the castle?" she asked angrily to the man at the top of the hole.
"Well, yes, but I'm not now am I?" Jarod retorted sarcastically, crouching down to peer at Sarah.
"Does Jareth know you're out?" she looked at him skeptically.
"What the Goblin King doesn't know won't hurt him," Jarod replied with a look of mischief on his face.
Sarah laughed. "I like you. But why are you here?" she asked.
"To get you out of this hole." Jarod smiled as he stood up.
"And just how are you planning to do that?"
Jarod smiled and held up a long rope in his right hand. "With this."
~~~~~
Ann Parker: And that is chapter four, everyone! Hope you liked it!
Whiteowl: Yeah, and to those that might be confused. The thing to remember with this chapter is its title: "Things aren't what they seem." And if you
still don't get it, go watch Labryinth again! Heck, even if you do get it go watch it again! *sigh* Jareth...
Ann: -_-** And if you still don't get it, then go watch some episodes of Pretender! *sigh* Jarod...
Whiteowl: Oh I see how it is, you can sigh over your bishie but I can't? Well :p
Ann: Okay, calm down hon. We can both dream about our bishie. Hey, maybe if we think about them long enough they will appear!
Whiteowl: Okay!
*both dream about bishie*
*Jareth and Jarod appear*
Jarod: *looks around confused* What the? How did I get here? This isn't the Centre, is it?
Ann: Nope! *glomps Jarod* You'll be safe here!
Jareth: *looks around annoyed* What is going on? Who are you people and where am I?
Whiteowl: eeee! *glomps Jareth* You've finally came!
*Jarod and Jareth both sweatdrop*
Ann: See, I told you it would work! *Whiteowl nods* Okay, everybody now send us those reviews!! Ja ne!
Whiteowl: Bye! Tune in next time for more episodes of authoresses and bishie.