Squall's eyes winced against the bright light in his face. no matter where he turned it was as if the light was all around him shining into his eyes His eyes slowly adjusted, and he realized that it wasn't just his eyes, it was the entire area. He was in a bright white room. No… room isn't the right word – REALM. All that was there was a bright shining union of colors as far as he could see. There were no walls, no floor even. Squall could feel something under his feet, but he saw nothing under him. Even shadows didn't cast themselves on whatever it was he was standing on.

Looking down at himself he was wearing his usual leather pants and jacket, and a white cotton shirt underneath. His trusty Lionheart gunblade hung on his left hip, attached to the two belts that rested on his waist. Checking his watch, it read 0318 hours and 42 seconds and counting. He shook his head Where am I?

He heard an anguished scream behind him and spun. Squinting again, Squall just barely made out a patch of what looked like darkness in this white area. The scream had come right from it. He slowly tested walking, and found despite a lack of visual contact with whatever it was he was standing on, it was solid and he could walk freely on it. His boots did not make an echo or any sort of sound indicting that he was actually walking, nor could he even tell by any change of his surroundings. Whatever he was standing on was very solid, almost like tile or concrete though.

Squall continued walking and felt disoriented. The soles of his boots propelled him forward pushing the "ground", if it could be called that. He would swear he was just floating motionless in empty air if not for the physical sensations of his muscles meeting resistance. He pressed on.

Squall was not sure how long had gone by or how far he had gone. He estimated from the number of steps that he had gone about a quarter mile. The dark patch was more distinct now, but no bigger, just a seeming point off in the distance. Another scream sounded in front of him, and it was definitely closer. Squall broke into a jog then a full fledged run at the dark patch. He ran for miles, he was sure, because he got tired and finally hit the point where his normal excersizes stopped. Four miles, I've gone four miles. The dark patch was no closer and he was beginning to wonder if he was imagining it. He slowed to a walk to cool his body down, then stopping completely, bent over to rest his hands on his knees to catch his breath.

Several breaths later he realized there was a soft buzzing in his ear. He cocked his ear and he could hear it better. He couldn't tell what it was, or where it was coming from. In fact it seemed to be coming from all around him. He looked up with an exhausted face to try to find the source but froze. The black patch was now a hole at least as tall as him.

He looked confused at it then around again into the white void. Suddenly it occurred to him where he had seen this before. In the time compression, after we had defeated Ultimecia. We were in a white void. Squall stared at the dark patch in front of him and as he watched it seemed to grow again. The buzzing increased in volume in his head and he shook it. Now he could make out faint whispers in the buzzing. He looked up and the black hole in front of him seemed to be inviting him in, beckoning.

A third scream echoed though the void. Squall could not tell how far away it was because it seemed to echo though unseen walls in this white prison. The soft whispers became noticeably more agitated but no louder or more understandable. He picked up his speed again, resuming a light jog at the black void hovering in front of him. The whispers slowly grew louder, and slowly merged into a sea of soft murmurs. They came from all around and seemed to be right next to him, yet no matter where he looked, he saw no source for them, nor could he understand anything being said.

An unknown number of miles later, Squall slowed to a walk again, unsure of what to do. The black void stayed roughly the same size. No matter how far he went before, he did not seem any closer to it. The soft agitated murmur was starting to get on his nerves after hours of listening to it. He looked at his watch again and was more distressed. It read 0321 hours and 14 seconds, counting. That's impossible! I've been going for hours, what the hell is this place?

Another scream echoed from in front of him, only instead of a monosyllable shout, it was a plea. "Help!"

Squall's heart flipped. He knew that voice. "Rinoa! Rinoa! Where are you?"

"Help!"

Squall broke into a dead run again, sprinting as fast as he could and pushing himself well beyond his normal endurance levels. Rinoa is in trouble. I have to… what's that? Squall stopped and stared into the black void, which seemed to be all in front of him now. Half this universe was pitch black, the other half was white as the sun shining on new fallen snow. This did not concern him however.

In the blackness, Squall could make out a shape huddled there. It was light blue and had matching cloth on its wrists. Raven black hair fell all around and hid a face, which was buried in small feminine hands. Squall instantly recognized her. "Rinoa!"

Rinoa looked up at him. She was only feet away, but she did not seem to see him. She just looked blankly like she wasn't focusing. Squall's eyes widened in horror. Rinoa's eyes were a furious burning gold and the veins in her skin were burning red under her white skin. The whites of her eyes were blood red, and her lips could not stop trembling. She looked almost at him then jerked her head another direction, then another.

Squall tried to step towards her, but suddenly he felt something resisting his movement. He stepped back and brought his hand out. About half way extended, it seemed to encounter a thick resistance. It wasn't a wall, because his hand could still move through it, but it took noticably more effort to move his hand. He could identify nothing there which could explain this phenomenom.

Squall's mind could still hear the agitated murmurs and mutterings all around him. He closed his eyes and pushed them out of his mind for the moment. He needed to concentrate on Rinoa. They were still there, but his focus was centered now, not floating around trying to find the source of the whispers. "Rinoa"

Her eyes turned to him again, and Squall felt sickened. They still did not focus, and she seemed more frightened. "Squall"

Squall stuck his hand deeper into the unknown substance resisting his hand. "It's me, Rinoa."

Her face softened for a moment as her eyes melted back into their natural chocolate brown color. Her skin seemed to mellow out and loose the red lines burning under her skin. Then the whispers spiked in their agitation again. Her eyes flashed back to their burning angry gold and she turned away from him. "Get away from me! Get away from me!"

She stood and seemed to try to swim away from him. Squall tried to push into this substance but Rinoa shouted again. "Get away from me!"

Her hand shot up and sprayed lightning at him. Squall instinctively jumped back and pulled his hand out of the substance. He felt no wash of lightning similar to what he felt when Edea or Ultimecia cast Thundaga on him. The spell seemed to just end at the point where his hand encountered the increased resistance. It fizzled there and stopped as Rinoa finished casting the spell.

Rinoa curled up into her ball again and Squall tenatively approached her. He hit the resistance again and pushed through it completely, testing a theory and using his arms to propel himself like he was swimming. It worked and he was swimming towards Rinoa. He tenatively tested his breathing right inside and found it unimpared. He slowly moved with easy strokes at Rinoa as she remained still.

Slowly, Squall reached his hand out to her, pausing just inches away from her shoulder, and whispred loud enough for her to hear, but not enough to startle her – he hoped. "Rinoa?"

Rinoa looked up again with a start and tried to move away from him instantly. Squall tried to grab her shoulder but missed. Instead he took her arm and jerked her back towards him harder than he meant to. She tried to jerk away her arm but he used his other hand to grab it and squeezed hard. "Rinoa, don't"

She struggled for another moment before her hand wrapped around his and started squeezing something. What is… The Griever ring? Her fingers felt around it and traced the roaring lion on top of it. Her eyes slowly melted into its normal beautiful chocolate color. He had told her once that the thing he liked to look at the most was her eyes. They seemed to be something in them that just drew him to her. He lost himself into her gaze for more seconds than he should have, but he could not help it. Her veins seemed to dim again and her eyes cleared up as a single tear rolled down her eye. "Squall?"

Squall nodded slowly. "It's me, Rinoa"

Her eyes slowly focused on him and a quiet smile blossomed on her lips as tears started streaming down her eyes. "Squall…."

Her arms slowly wrapped around his neck like it was completely natural, and despite years of not being hugged like this by her, his arms immediately wrapped around her waist and crawled up her back hugging her tightly. "Rinoa… I'm here, nothing can harm you"

Rinoa hugged him tightly and buried her face in his shoulder. He heard a few sobs coming from her and imagined, like so many times in the past, that the fur lined collar was being used as a makeshift tissue. He ran his gloved hand into her hair slowly and held her close, relishing in this touch which he missed so much.

The whispering around him grew again and she pulled back in terror covering her ears and collapsing back into that little ball. Squall stepped forward to grab her again but moved nowhere. He remembered he needed to swim and started kicking with his legs. As he approached her he took a quick look around and noted that the universe had shifted black as night, with the white area that he was in before occupying only a small part of the horizon now.

Irvine watched through the window as the sun set. Squall had been like that for nearly 10 hours. Shiva was pacing too. She was having trouble staying in this realm and more than once Quistis had to re-summon her. He watched her as she paced now, leaving small patches of ice on the ground. "How much longer can this take?"

Shiva shook her head. "I don't know. Time is not the issue here even. "

Irvine frowned. "What does that mean?"

Shiva spoke softly. "In a sorceress' mind, with dozens to hundreds of memories of past people, time can be blurred. Trust me... I know."

Irvine stared at the couple. If he didn't know what was going on, he might say it looked cute that they were sleeping huddled on the floor like that. Now... he was just afraid. Waiting was never a soldier's favorite activity and this was just agony.

Squall bent down and took her shoulders softly. She kept chanting "Make it stop… please make it stop" as she held her ears. Squall frowned and lifted her chin. "Make what stop? The whispers? Can you hear the whispers?"

Rinoa's sob broken voice babbled on. "Stop the voices… please… in my head… stop them."

Squall checked his watch. It now read 0324 hours, yet he was sure about 3-4 hours had passed. Fuzzy memories of the hospital room fluttered back into his mind. Shiva, my friends preparing to fight Rinoa… what's happened? Squall figured if he had been here for what seemed like hours, Rinoa probably was too, and the volume of the whispers was probably driving her crazy by now. "Rinoa come with me"

He took her hand and pulled her swimming towards the bright white light. Rinoa jerked back. "No! You hurt me enough you bastard! What did I do to deserve you cheating on me!" She started swimming away from him and Squall chased her. "Rinoa!"

Suddenly a white flash broke out and the voices stopped whispering. He was suddenly standing on the train platform of Balamb. He looked around and people mingled through the station and out in the street. A sharp whistle sounded and Squall jumped and looked up to find a train there. Inside the train, staring at him through the window was Rinoa.

She stared back at him with the window half way down. "Please Squall, I can't take it anymore! You don't love me, just admit it and let me go!"

Squall's heart sunk as he thought back to the day three years ago when she had left. He made it into the train station as it was pulling away, not spoken to Rinoa like this. "Rinoa please! Talk to me! What did I do to make you think I don't love you?"

The train started moving and Squall bolted into a run to keep up with it. Rinoa gazed down at him. "Please… just… it hurts too much. I can't take it anymore!"

The train sped up and Squall started sprinting trying to keep up. Squall shouted over the thrum of the train. "Rinoa! What did I do!"

Suddenly, everything flashed again and he was standing in the secretary room of the Garden Administration floor. Wait a second… this is before renovation. My office isn't even built yet! Rinoa was standing in front of Squall's desk with her head hung low. "You said you would be working late again with Xu. I just came up to see if I could help you speed things up a bit. You weren't here"

The scene flashed again and they were standing in a dormitory hall. A door just around the corner opened and then closed. Squall felt the eerily disturbing sensation of seeing himself walk out the door. Xu's door. I was… Hyne no! Rinoa was sobbing with her back to the wall around the corner out of Squall's sight. He watched as what he could only think of as his younger self walk by, not turning to look down the hallway and see Rinoa standing there watching him with teary eyes. "Rinoa, no! That's…

Rinoa cut him off with a hiss. "You were cheating on me, Squall, with your own secretary! I never thought that you of all people would fall into a relationship like that. Then again, I suppose that's what I get. Not one promise of marriage and not one sign you even wanted to marry me!"

Rinoa stormed off through the hallway. Squall remembered that this was days before Rinoa's birthday and that she had not come back that night. She had told him that she had gotten stuck in Balamb for the night. She probably ran there and cried all night. "Rinoa… please… I was in there…"

Rinoa cut him off again. "Don't bother trying to tell me about this B.S. about a surprise party. Irvine couldn't convince me."

Squall watched as Rinoa started running. His mind whirled as he thought about all the work that went into decorating the ballroom. Suddenly the scene flashed and they were in the room. Squall looked a bit surprised but not as surprised as Rinoa as she watched younger versions of Squall, Zell, Irvine, and Xu decorating the room. Xu slapped Irvine's buttocks softly and winked at him before whispering. "Tonight, my room?"

Irvine grinned and winked back. "As soon as ol' grump leaves."

Squall's younger self sighed and turned to them. "If you two want to pretend to work, could you at least tell me why the hell we have light blue napkins?"

Xu chuckled and spun to face Squall's younger self. As she did so, Squall saw Xu slip her hand under Irvine's jacket. So that's why Irvine squeaked like that… "Of course, Squall. Her duster and wristbands are the same color. It's a fairly logical assumption she likes it right?"

His younger self sighed. "Women…"

Xu and Irvine chuckled "Xu, ya better get to your room first."

Xu nodded and walked out. Irvine grinned as she walked out then wrapped his arm around the alter-Squall's neck. "Yanno sumfin, Squall? Women are like that. Ya gonna have to live with it if you want to marry her."

Rinoa's face widened in horror. "NO! LIES!" She spun and ran out the room and Squall ran after her, letting history, or whatever that was, take its course. Squall quickly caught up with Rinoa and grabbed her arm. "Rinoa…"

The scene flashed again and they were on the balcony, where the two had talked a few weeks ago. Squall could hear Rinoa's singing rising slowly through the hotel that told him they had some time before their… other selves… would be walking through the door. Rinoa turned to Squall but kept a healthy distance from him. "Squall, I told you here to stay away from me remember? I don't want you anywhere near me."

Squall walked over to the railing and leaned over onto it. "Rinoa, I remember before I…. Died…" Squall still had more than a little trouble wrapping his mind around the concept that he actually died. "I remember you had a ring box in your hands. I recognized it, because I had spent hours staring at it. What was in it?"

Rinoa looked down at her feet with her hands folded behind her back and dug her right heel into the ground. "I… it was a ring."

Squall continued staring out at the garden which he didn't notice in much detail the last time he was here. "Who's ring?"

Rinoa looked up at him and thought for a moment. "It was… your ring… you were going to give it to me."

Squall turned his back to the breathtaking scenery behind him. "You said before that I never gave you a sign that I wanted to marry you. You were holding it in your hand."

Rinoa looked at her hands for a moment then at Squall's face before turning away from him. The door opened and the Rinoa that was actually supposed to be here slowly strode onto the balcony and leaned against the railing, gazing into the orchard below. That Rinoa stared right past the arguing couple on her way without so much as even a sign that she saw them there.

The Rinoa not supposed to be here sighed and joined her counterpart staring over the railing. Squall looked at the sight with even more discomfort. Not only was Rinoa there, but there were two Rinoas, doing exactly the same thing and with the same expression on their faces. All this was starting to wear on his nerves but he didn't let himself loose control. Squall wondered idly how long it would be before his own counterpart joined the party here and started the conversation he remembered.

He turned and gazed out at the garden as well before turning to face the two Rinoas. "What is this anyways? How are we seeing the past and ourselves here?"

The Rinoa he could interact with shook her head and looked down, while the Rinoa who was supposed to be here continued gazing out at the scenery. "I don't know… I…"

At that moment, the door opened and the Squall that was supposed to be here walked in. "Squall, go away please. I don't want to talk to you"

Squall turned to face himself. He knew what he was thinking at that instant and the Rinoa that was not supposed to be here turned as well. "Rinoa, why?"

Squall strode idly towards his counterpart staring himself in the eye. I was not there last time, and he can't see me. I don't even know what this is. Squall waved a hand in front of his alter ego's face and got no response, which did not surprise him. The Rinoa he could interact with walked away from the railing. "Squall, I already told you once, I don't even need to repeat myself." She pointed to her alter ego.

"Why what, Squall?"

Squall listened to every detail of the conversation again and remembered trading thoughts with Rinoa in her mind. urst of energy he tried to direct his thoughts into the mind of the Rinoa he had been conversing with, but she did not even look like she was paying attention. Why isn't she getting it? It wasn't a fluke.

Calm down, Squall.

Squall looked up at the Rinoa he could interact with as their alter egos continued their conversation. You can hear me?

Yes.

What is this?

I'm guessing something to do with my sorceress powers, though you're the only one that can hear me.

Squall considered. Rinoa… the Knight of the Sorceress is supposed to protect her body AND mind. It would make sense if a Knight could hear his Sorceress' thoughts wouldn't it?

Rinoa considered. You're not my Knight. I de-knighted you three years ago.

Squall couldn't help but chuckle softly at this. How, may I ask? Do you know how to de-knight someone? Have you done it before? Is it even possible?

Rinoa turned to him and her eyes flashed gold. "Don't you dare try to mock me."

The other Rinoa heatedly shouted nearly with her. "I don't care what you say Squall, I don't EVER want to see you... OR FEEL YOU... again!" then stormed out of the balcony area, leaving his other self quite alone. Squall felt alone himself suddenly, maybe a reflection of this, or maybe because he still acutely felt this memory in his mind.

Squall shook his head. "Rinoa I lost you once, I'm not going to loose you again. I know somewhere inside you, you know all this isn't real. You told me before." He closed his eyes and concentrated completely on one point in time which he thought he could use to convince Rinoa. When he opened his eyes he was still on the balcony. He quirked his head and wondered if he was forcing it. He relaxed and suddenly the entire scene flashed again. He smiled gently. It worked.

Rinoa was standing in the field of flowers outside Matron's house. If I've done this right, yet another Rinoa, Quistis, and I should be walking in right... Before Squall finished that thought, the three walked in. Rinoa turned and watched the three walk in. The conversation happened exactly as he remembered it, down to the very last detail, and the promise. Squall kept an eye on Rinoa as she re-watched this distant memory, almost 4 years old now, one that Squall had kept close in his heart. As Squall's younger self spoke his promise, Squall quietly repeated it, but loud enough that Rinoa could hear it.

Rinoa looked down at her feet as the two younger versions of themselves walked out of the field, ready to go meet Laguna and his friends in Esthar. Rinoa's voice was very quiet but audible. "Squall, what do you want?"

Squall paused a moment. "I want you to trust me again. You did once, and I am sorry I was so afraid before, but I never cheated on you, not with Xu or anybody else. We're trapped here, and unless you're hiding something from me, neither of us knows how to get out of here. "

Rinoa shook her head and the scene faded to the black universe that they had started in as she covered her face with her hands and fell onto her knees. "All I want is freedom. A world without any of this dark unending night."

Squall heard the faint whispers starting again. They seemed right with them yet so far away. He knelt down and pulled Rinoa into his arms. "Let me be your shelter and your light. I'm here with you, and I will guard you and guide you if you let me."

She looked up at him. "Squall... I know you're a military man. Do you swear on your honor? Promise me that all you say is true."

Squall nodded. Rinoa smiled and reached out her hand to him. Squall held his own out and slowly took hers in his gloved hand. Rinoa felt his Griever ring under his glove and stood slowly with his help. Hand in hand they walked back towards the white realm slowly, hindered by the seeming watery resistance, and stepped through the barrier.

Squall woke with Rinoa at the same time. They looked at each other and then up at the other people. Rinoa smiled and nodded and stood up with them. With a quiet smile, Rinoa turned to Squall and embraced him, and Squall quickly followed suit. Everybody let out a collective sigh of relief, even Shiva who was still in the human realm. With a gust of cool air, she closed her eyes and slid back into the ground surrounded by ice. As she did so, she looked at Squall with her cool eyes and smiled. Squall squinted as a light flashed in his eyes. Covering them he looked out to see the sun rising.

Authors notes: Well here is Chapter 21 a week late :P sigh... I'm a lazy procrastinating bastard for sure lol. I'm working hard on 22 and I still have it as a goal to finish the story by this weekend though its looking like that's going to slip. Random Reader: I'm way ahead of you ;) Anyways this chapter might not make sense totally, and its not supposed to, I'll let you guys figure out why. ;)