CHAPTER TWO

Goodbye

They say about farewells that they are not forever. For Hermione, the one at King's Cross meant waking up from a dream that has lasted what lasts a new toy on a child's hands on Christmas day. But waking up was the hardest, because now she felt like the moment between asleep and awake and all she wanted to do was going to back to dream again; because the remembrance of the dream was so good that she found herself wishing that when she closed her eyes, the dream would continue exactly where she had left it.

Standing in front of the platform that would lead them back to reality, the three friends watched each other speechless. What could they say in a moment like that? All that can be said is a lie; the rest was just silence… even when silence doesn't exist, could thirstiness be satisfied by just saying water? Could the hungry feel felt up by just saying bread? Words do not make love but the absence of it; they fill the emptiness that uncertainty creates. But this one wasn't such case. Staring at each other, uncertainty had nothing to do there because each of them knew exactly what their feelings were towards each other, even when some feelings were not corresponded.

They looked at each other; smiles drawing across their faces, Hermione's was just Harry's reflection, and they hug strongly not wishing to let go and wanting the moment to last forever. But what forever was? Wasn't that just a way of measuring time? Dates would keep running and would stop when the heart beats for a reason and would keep running and would stop again when the event repeats itself over again.

Hermione didn't want to let go off them, she wasn't ready, but the ball of fire inside of her started to burn her with such intensity that she had no other choice. She stepped aside cleaning the rain from her eyes; looked up to see the sky and it was clear, then she noticed her friends crying too, had it only be a reflection? Hermione smiled and they did the same too. Then a trivial talk started "we'll see each other soon" "we'll keep in touch" "Maybe we'll meet again at Auror's school" and all those things people normally say after a long forced time to be together is over. Nevertheless Hermione had already told them that she would assist to a Muggle school as her parents wanted her to. A last four year wish could be her salvation. Maybe being away, she'd stop dying… or al least it would hurt less.

After a nervous laughter, Hermione said goodbye to Ron with a kiss on the cheek and a hug. The guy crossed the platform where he would wait for Harry to go with him to the burrow. Harry approached to her to do the same as Ron. She held his hand and managed herself to stop her impulses to put it on her face with the hope of him noticing what he had never noticed before; and would never notice not even with bigger glasses. When they kissed each other's cheek she felt thousand of ants running all over her skin and kept herself from turning her face; this wasn't something that could be fixed with just a kiss. And when he finally hugged her, she had to take an over human strength to avoid fainting in front of him. She needed to be fed from him if she wasn't going to see him for a long time, she'd take at least what was necessary to survive.

Little by little, Harry let go off her but Hermione pulled him back.

"Just a little longer" she said looking into those green eyes that made all her insides to crumble.

Hermione had only managed to say those words while she hugged him in silence; but that didn't mean that her hear wasn't speaking; that it wasn't screaming with the little strength in it. And in the middle of the boom-a-boom of her heart, a message was being transmitted by a non visible or auditive media for the human being, unfortunately. Those words Hermione longed to tell him but had always died on her lips being sepulchred in the graveyard of her regrets.

You fill my everything already although I'm nothing in you. And I'm leaving you, you're happy anyways, you won't even notice it. I'm the pain that has never caused you harm and I'll manage to follow my path somehow. Although I'm dying to stay here forever; and there are words that die for coming out to fill the emptiness left from not telling you my feelings. Although I want to ask you a little more of your time and heal my failure. But if you leave, take with you at least my tired arms; however I gave you already my love, my faith, my whole life; and if you take them with you I don't care where else they are. Why do you leave so soon? Don't cherish my agony, if the night waits all day, wait you too.

After a long moment, Hermione let go off him still whipping. She didn't know if Harry had realized. It was more likely for him to think that she'd done it because of the dependency she had developed towards him through the years. They looked around and could no see somebody else at the train station. The clock was about to marc the dead line for them to walk through the platform. Harry gave her his hand and walked together through it. On the other side, Ron was waiting for them sitting on a bench with his head lying on the back and the trunks beside him. Ginny was with him too, with her head on his shoulder half asleep.

Harry let go off Hermione's hand to approach them and Hermione felt like falling down in that very instant, little by little. Then she understood that she would keep that feeling inside of her from then on and there was nothing she could do about it. So she tied her coat, put her gloves on and gave them a last look while Harry bent down to kiss Ginny wake up. That was way more than she could stand; she waved them goodbye; gave them a smile and walked away taking her two trunks filled with memories with her.