Anger – Part I in the Unrequited Love in Five Easy Steps series

Cyborg

I hate this body. I hate it. I hate that I can do so many things now. I can lift two thousand pounds with my bare hands. But they aren't really bare. They're the hands of an android. And I can't do anything myself anymore.

A tragedy, I know. I pity myself. Self-pity. They all said for me to get over myself.

Fuck.

Fuck, fuck, fuck.

Well fuck that. I tried getting over myself. But in the end, I'm still a Cyborg.

My name used to be Victor Stone. I used to have a human name. I used to. But now I'm just a machine. Mostly anyway. It used to hurt. Now it burns. It burns inside. I think I technically shouldn't have any emotions as it is. I was lucky to have retained the emotions I've got.

Yeah. I was lucky.

I was lucky like the guy who dies within seconds of getting diagnosed with incurable cancer.

And I was supposed to be lucky to have been saved. Anyone who feels lucky after what I've been through is better off dead.

And now what have I got? I've got friends. Yeah, right. I've got an alien who barely understands the English language, let alone understands me. I've got a girl who calls herself Raven. She's got her head stuck up her ass so fucking far she can't see the light of day. How the hell is she supposed to see me?

I've got Beast Boy. He's a good kid. I'll say it again. He's a good kid. A good kid. He doesn't understand anything. He's too young; immature. Stupid kids. I may not be much older, but I fuckin' know the world. Hell… just look at me. I'm an android. I think I get some things about this world.

And then we have Mister Leader-man. Yeah. Right. He's a real good friend. Won't even let his best friends – his trusted companions – see his face. His eyes. His eyes. I'm jumping at the chance to be best friends with that one. Can't we just feel the love?

I don't know why this happened to me. Maybe God said, "I haven't secretly fucked with enough people today. I'm going to…screw that person over." And it just happened to be me. Maybe it was pure coincidence. But they say there are no such things as coincidences.

So what the hell am I left with? I'm left as a permanently disabled boy. My body is always going to be that of a teenager. I'll probably never grow much older looking. Metal never grows old – only rusty. And with the new upgrades perpetually coming out, my metal will never get rusted.

Perhaps I am being too harsh. But I don't care. This body is barely meant to entertain emotions. Why am I supposed to care?

I'll never know. My CPU does not comprehend. Caring: the act of caring. What the fuck do I care?

I just wish someone was like me. I wish I could at least look human. I wish…I fucking wish so many things. But who the hell listens to people like me? I'm just the mechanic who has a fetish for cars. Probably because they're closer to me in 'DNA' than those people who try to call me friend.

I would pray to God. But he screwed me over. And those 'deities' (and yes I know that goddamn word) the girls are always praying to? I personally don't think they're worth shit. It looks to me that Raven and Star have a bunch of shit in their life that their Goddesses haven't deigned to fix.

Maybe life would be better if everything fell apart. Starfire says that the future is crap because we all did that drifting thing. I don't know that I give a fuck anymore.

Sometimes I feel a little bit sorry I feel that way. And then I remember that I'm supposed to be lucky that I feel. So I shut down the emotional sector and life feels so much better. Contentment creeps through that wall I've put up and I can only think one thing.

Fuck.

AN: My my, Cyborg sure is angry. Tough for him. Sorry about the ending, it sort of sucked, yes? I thought so, but I truly believe the other endings are better.

As it may have been indicated, this is a five part series. It's 95 done, meaning all of the chapters. I think Raven and Beast Boy are my favorites, but who knows? Please read and review.

Disclaimer: I don't own any part of Teen Titans.