Disclaimer: If you insist...I own nothing to do with SW, except the DVDs, the ROTS novelization and some random merchandise. Happy?

Well, I see a lot of you hate me. Maybe you'll hate me more after this. XD

GreatOne : Four Sith? I dunno, three's quite enough, don't you think? Don't give me ideas.

LVB: You are referring to the last line, right?

Freetrader: Devil horns Here's more.

Part IX

Leia's POV

"You're leaving?" I'd asked, shocked at Han's heated words. I had never conceived the possibility that he could actually find it in his heart to desert me. I had thought that we would stay together forever, but it had ended the way all relationships did. It festered and died.

"Yes, leaving, Princess. The only reason I stayed in this stupid rebellion was you." He had snarled angrily.

"Then why are you leaving? I'm still here, aren't I?" He had frowned at that.

"Do I have to spell it out for you? This is over, Your Worship." And he'd stalked away. I didn't know why that exchange still lingered in my mind – it was over; Han had said so himself, and I wholeheartedly agreed with him. I did not need that slimy pile of filth in my life, anyway. I had been lying to myself all along. Yet he haunted me – he tormented me hour after hour, day and night.

I sighed as I got up from my cot aboard the small shuttle I had taken to Dagobah shortly after resigning my commission in the Alliance. It had been hard to let go, but I had priorities now, namely my Jedi training. I almost laughed – I thought of it so casually now, as if it had been like this all my life, though at first – just under two weeks ago – it had come a major shock to me – think about it – me, princess Leia Organa, a Jedi Knight. Like that would ever happen.

I had been shocked, but overjoyed at the opportunity. After learning what had happened to my former friend Skywalker – no more first name basis – I had known that I no longer needed the Alliance to get my revenge. The two remaining jedi wanted me to destroy him – they wanted me to, and I would murder him with pleasure. Of course, they did not know that. Perhaps they thought I was simply devoted to their cause.

I was shaken from my musings by a dark and powerful presence. That had to be him. Him, as in Skywalker. I had known that I would confront him at one time or another, though this was most unexpected. Still, his intentions were crystal clear. I unfastened my lightsaber from its resting place at my belt and exited the ship. It was show time.

Sweating profusely, Leia wiped her brow with her sleeve. The humidity of the slimy mudhole made Yavin IV pale in comparison. For the umpteenth time, she scanned her environment with the Force. Skywalker had to be around here somewhere…She could feel him clearly and precisely, so had to be nearby. And she discovered that he was as she turned around.

Out of the shadows emerged an infinitely darker shadow, cloak billowing behind him, blowing in the nonexistent wind. She could barely recognize the wide-eyed farmboy that had burst into her cell aboard the Death Star. He was clad entirely in black, the antithesis of his former self, his once bright blue eyes were cracked, frozen cobalt, and his once handsome face was hard and twisted into a scowl. And he was empty, a void in the Force. Had she truly known this man? Either way, that had been ages ago, a time long past. This was the present.

"Skywalker." She spat, the name now a curse.

"Organa. What a pleasant surprise, " He sneered, suggesting that the encounter was anything but pleasant. Well, it sure would be pleasant for her to do away with him, Leia thought, envisioning her blade burying itself in his flesh, picturing the stricken expression on his face, almost hearing his agonized death cry. It was time to make that fantasy a reality.

"Well then, let's get started, shall we? Let's see if you can offer a better challenge than the old fool did," He scoffed, igniting his lightsaber, a pure blue that did not quite fit him. Belatedly, she realized that he was referring to Yoda. Yet another death to avenge. She resumed focus on Skywalker's blade. Blue? It looked so much like his old one, but Leia knew that it was probably still drifting among the gasses of Bespin. Bespin. Carbonite. Vader.

Igniting her own amethyst blade, she literally threw herself at him. Strike. Die. Parry. Slash. Die, Vader, Die! As they exchanged more blows, images flashed before her eyes. Lying broken in her cell aboard the Death Star…more vicious slashes. Alderaan shattering into a million fiery sparks…more heavy blows. His last words before being carbon-frozen…the fury, now a living thing, raging inside her, forcing its way out. Skywalker's wide eyes as the blade pierces him…And this time it was real.

Deactivating her blade, she looked down at the still corpse at her feet. Clipping her saber to her belt, she spat on the body. Finally, he had gotten what he deserved. Or did he, really? Yes, of course the little Sithspawn had gotten what he deserved…Is this what you want? Are you happy now?

…Luke died, and you can't even try to forgive him for something he's never done in the first place?

…Shut up, Han …

…Luke died…

…SHUT UP!

…and you can't even try to forgive him for something he's never done in the first place…

And only then did it hit her, how completely and utterly blind, foolish, prejudiced and just plain stupid she had been. Only then did she realize what a terrible thing she had done. She bit her lip in an attempt to restrain the tears that strived to spill onto her cheeks as she looked down at the pale, lifeless form that lay on the ground. So beautiful, so fragile, fragile like the friend she had betrayed then mercilessly slaughtered, haunted like his eyes had been an eternity ago in the dark cell aboard the rebel cruiser…She doubled over as broken sobs racked her entire body, the tears now flowing freely in tiny rivers, merging with the swampy waters as they hit the ground.

"What have I done?" She whispered the question, though the answer was so painfully obvious. You betrayed and murdered him. And you relished it. You spat on his corpse. Is this how you treat your loved ones?

I will do everything in my power to ensure that you do die…

…I wish he was dead…

"Oh gods…I'm sorry…I'm so sorry. I know you're dead, but I'm sorry. Forgive me, Luke…I know you're dead, but please forgive me…please." Her desperate plea went unanswered, and she was greeted by absolute silence. Even the birds grew quiet. It was silence, even in the Force. Brutal, merciless silence. So she ran, far away, as fast as she could. But she could never get away, because wherever she went, everything went with her.

Exhausted like never before, Leia crumpled and fell onto her bunk. She had shed all the tears she had left in her. The pain had been dulled, and she could feel nothing, hollow and alone, trapped in a coffin of ice. In her glacial coffin she drifted off into a deep, all-encompassing slumber.

The world is a swirl of half-blurred images and fleeting emotions. It is a trance-like state, but she does not know it, for her mind is incapable of forming words. Words do not exist here. There is a sense of belonging about this place. Sweet and warm, like honey. She raises her gaze to meet loving brown eyes and long, smooth, silky dark hair. There is something about her, warm, comforting and…motherly? Mother? Yes, it is her. She can feel it…she is innately linked to her. Even more so with a presence beside her…It is her, but at the same time, it isn't. It is almost an extension of herself. It is her other half, in the Force fused to her. She does not know what it is, but cannot help but love it, because it is a part of her, as it will stay forever…She turns to meet intense, piercing blue eyes…Why is it suddenly gone? The bond is broken, and it feels so empty…so horribly empty…

Leia woke with a start – what a strange dream that had been. So strange that it had been beyond descriptions – simply wordless, her mind so numb that she could not think coherent thoughts…all she remembered was the woman who had constantly haunted her dreams for as long as she could remember – the woman Leia assumed was her mother. But this time it had been different – there had been someone else, someone so deeply linked to her that they left a gaping hole in her soul as they abruptly disappeared. She had felt their bond tear, tear like fragile, delicate fabric in her grasp, for all that she touched, she destroyed.

And blue eyes. There had been blue eyes in her dream, eyes of such a remarkable shade of azure…In her entire life, she had only seen them in one person…No, it couldn't have been him. That person, whoever (s)he was, had been so close to her, like a lover, or a…a twin. Yes, that was more like it. Leia was adamant that she had no twin – unless he – it had seemed male to her – had died at around the same time as her mother.

This is insane…I'm making up wild theories about some nonexistent twin of mine. Luke's death must be going to my head. Oh Sith, I killed him…why did I have to kill him? Why did he have to die? Why did you have to die? Die…Blue eyes….No, she denied, it could not have been him. But it was. Stars, it had felt like him.

"Oh no…no…no, this can't be real…"

But it was. It was heartbreakingly real. She had killed her brother without the slightest bit of hesitation, and there was no denying it, try as she might. Yet still she sought to find another explanation. It just wasn't possible. No, not her twin. Maybe she really was mentally deranged, coming up with such crazy ideas.

"Obi-Wan — Luke wasn't my brother, was he?"

"I'm afraid so," Said the old General's disembodied voice. He had known. Obi-Wan had known. And he hadn't said a thing.

"Why…d-didn't you t-tell me? If you had, m-maybe things would have gone…d-differently. Maybe…" She trailed off, unable to continue.

"It had to be done, Leia. Once you turn to the Dark Side, you can never go back." Leia paid no heed to his words.

"You knew, Obi-Wan. You knew all along. And you didn't even think of telling me. You knew I wanted him to die…and you encouraged it. How could you do this? You let me murder him in cold blood!" And she had trusted him. Never again.

"As I said, Leia. Some things just have to be done, terrible as they may seem. Sometimes there are sacrifices made." Never again. Never again would she let this happen. If only she could start over… If only she could get a second chance… If only she could make things right again… If only…