Yay for me! As a celebration for finishing all my work, I treated myself to writing the Sean/Ellie breakup scene. If it were up to me, I'd probably work on it for another few weeks but I feel really bad about taking so long to update, so it's not my best. I tried to keep it short and (bitter)sweet and I hope that those of you still interested in this story enjoy it!

I Am Fred Astaire

You should have never come here alone.

Ellie hated herself for wanting to cry. Eleanor Olivia Nash did not cry. It just didn't happen. She'd practically forgotten it was possible. Her father had gone halfway around the world and stayed there until she forgot the details of his face. Her mother had lived for years at the bottom of a particularly deep bottle before finally entering rehab. And Ellie had survived just fine, thank you very much, without blubbering like a baby.

Granted, her alternative way of dealing had been less than healthy, but at least the scars could be hidden. And heal, for that matter. There was no way to hide how upset she was with her cheeks red, her lips trembling, and her eyes brimming with hot, stinging tears.

She blinked furiously, determined not to let them fall just yet. First she would hear what her boyfriend had to say. He deserved the chance to explain. She needed him to explain. Letting the door fall closed behind her, she found her way to the living room and immediately winced. Sean's face was a mess; a colorful collage of black, blue, and purple that made all her earlier concerns fly out the window.

"What happened to you?" she gasped, closing the distance between them and reaching a hand towards his bruised cheek.

Sean stepped back, avoiding both her touch and her eyes. "Jay and I had a … disagreement."

She should've known. Wherever Jay went, trouble followed close behind. Ellie heaved a sigh, not sure if she should be more concerned or pissed off. "What about?"

There was a pause. Ellie's eyes narrowed in suspicion. Pissed off, she decided, she was definitely leaning more towards pissed off.

For his part, Sean's brain was working overtime, debating on how much of the story to share. He didn't want to lie to Ellie. He'd never done that before. But he told her the truth, she would most likely find a way to pin the blame squarely on Emma's shoulders. Girls had a funny way of targeting each other in situations like this. And he really didn't think Emma could deal with the misery Ellie was capable of inflicting.

In the interest of saving everyone anguish, he shrugged. "Nothing major, he was just being a jackass. You know Jay."

Ellie bit her lip. He seemed sincere enough. And Jay was a jackass. But he and Sean were also best friends. And if Sean's condition was any sign, it didn't look like it had been a friendly wrestling match. "Well," she said slowly, deliberately, "Maybe he and Emma had a fight or something."

"What?" Hearing Emma's name on Ellie's lips was too surreal, Sean decided. Too on edge to stand still, he swung around and headed for the kitchen. "Why would you think that?"

"It makes sense," Ellie reasoned, having followed close behind him. Needing to at least feel like she had the upper hand, she hoisted herself onto the counter. "If he fought with her, then found you to work off some steam. You're the ex, Sean. You can be blamed for any problem that ever arises in their relationship."

"It's not a relationship," he murmured, and pulled an ice pack from the freezer. His head was pounding. And he figured that only about half the pain could be attributed to Jay's sucker punch. The rest was due to Ellie's calm, true, devastating words.

You're the ex, Sean.

He was Emma's ex. She was his. They were over and done with, had been for months. Hell, had been practically since they'd started. What was he thinking, kissing her like that? Asking her to stay? It was so utterly, totally, heinously wrong.

He wanted to do it again.

Ellie cocked her head to the side. "What makes you say that?"

"Say what?" Had he spoken out loud? Because that would be bad. Really bad, in such a way that it would probably be funny. "What'd I say?"

"That Emma and Jay don't have a relationship," she explained, speaking slowly, as if he were challenged. "'Cause from what I hear through the grapevine, they sure do."

"Ellie, please," Sean scoffed. "Can you see them lasting much longer? They're not right together. They're total opposites."

"People said the same thing about you and her," Ellie pointed out logically.

"Yeah, but we loved each other," he said.

Or thought he said. The way Ellie's jaw dropped to the floor gave him a clue that the words might have come out a bit longer. And the way her eyes had narrowed to slits had him counting out the paces to the nearest exit.

"Nice use of the present tense, there, Sean," she finally managed, prompting his words to replay themselves in his head.

Yeah, but we love each other. We love each other. We love each other.

Slowly, Sean lifted his gaze to meet Ellie's. "El," he began, then stopped. What could he say? Ellie took Psych, she knew what a Freudian slip was. Which meant she now knew what he'd been denying to himself for weeks and months and eons.

He loved Emma. He was head over heels for her. They way she walked, the way she talked, how she wasn't ever wrong and always knew it. Her laugh, her eyes, her skin, the way her fingers fit perfectly between his. How, when they'd been dating, he would wrap his arm around her waist to pull her closer and she would play with the hair at the back of his neck and he'd swear life was perfect.

"El," he said again, and made one final stab at doing the right thing, being the good guy. "That's not what I meant, that's …"

"Don't." She put a hand up to ward off whatever feeble excuse he was stumbling over. "Don't make yourself any more of a liar. Or me any more of a fool."

"You're not," he tried desperately. "And I'm not. It's just –"

"What were you and Jay really fighting about?" she interrupted.

Sean raked his hand through his hair, such a familiar, heartwarming gesture that she almost screamed. "Emma," he finally admitted. "We fought about Emma."

"Bet the poster girl for feminism really loved that one," Ellie bit out, baring her teeth in the mockery of a smile.

Sean ignored the tone, figuring she deserved to get at least a couple shots in. They should've been aimed at him, he knew that, but as long as Emma wasn't there to hear the poison Ellie spewed, he'd let it slide. "She stopped us before things got out of control."

"What a saint!"

"Ellie, please. Please, you have to hear me out on this one: It's not Emma's fault. She doesn't even know how I feel. Hell, I don't even know how I feel."

"You love her," Ellie said simply. "You're Sean and she's Emma and you've loved her since Grade Seven. No." She pulled away when he reached for her hand, trying his damnedest to soften the blow. "Don't. I've kind of always known. And I think you have, too."

"I didn't, I swear." He shook his head furiously. "I wouldn't have done that to you, Ellie."

"You didn't mean to." She knew that he wasn't so hurtful as to purposely break her heart. But it was breaking all the same, and she wasn't sure she could forgive him for that. Ellie's heart had never broken before. She wasn't exactly sure of the protocol. "We can't help who we love, I guess."

"I'm sorry," he offered, a little weakly. "I'm really, really sorry. I wish …"

"Things were different," she supplied, and shrugged. "Me, too."

The apartment was quiet for several minutes as they processed the unexpected turn of events. Ellie was the first to speak, clearing her throat and tugging on her ear anxiously. "I'll, um … I'll move back with my mother," she offered. "Just give me a few days to get my stuff together."

"You don't have to do that."

"No, I want to." And strangely enough, she did. She missed her mom. Not the drunk who'd yelled and slapped from the time Ellie was seven, but the real mom, the one she'd been before. The one she claimed she could be again. Ellie wanted to see that woman. She wanted to be held and comforted and nagged by her. "You should have this place to yourself again, I think. I think you need that."

She's right, he admitted to himself. He loved the idea of being alone in the apartment again, of having that independence. He'd lived most of his life alone or lonely, but when he'd rented the place, he hadn't felt either one of those. He'd felt, for the first time, like he had a home. And now that he'd made peace with the one in Wasaga Beach, it was time to fully enjoy the one in Degrassi.

"You're gonna be … okay?" He hated that his eyes flickered down to her wrists as he asked. Like you were such a great boyfriend that she'll kill herself over you, his conscience scoffed. Listen, man, she dealt with you leaving once, she'll do it again just fine.

She followed his gaze and chuckled slightly when she realized she hadn't snapped her elastic once throughout their conversation. She hadn't needed to. "Yeah," she told him, feeling lighter than she had in a long time. "Yeah, I think I'll be just fine."

He nodded, relieved, then brushed a stray strand of her hair back. "I think you will be, too."

Ellie closed her eyes when his fingers met her skin. This is good-bye, she told herself. A lot of people in her life had left her, but none of them had ever bothered to say good-bye. She admired and respected Sean for being the first.

Then she reached up to take his hand and pull it, gently, away from her face. Their fingers tangled together and fell apart. They both watched it happen without saying a word.

"You know I'm gonna tell everyone the reason we broke up is because you're gay, right?" Ellie joked after another long silence, attempting to lighten the mood.

Sean snorted. "That would make you 0 for 2, then."

"I sure do know how to pick 'em," she laughed. "Listen, will you drop me off at my mom's? I'll come back later and get everything but right now … it's …"

"A little raw," he agreed, sobering quickly. "I get it."

"Thank you."

Ellie led the way out of the apartment, being careful not to look back. None of that belongs to you, she told herself. You don't want it to.

The best part was, she really didn't.