I DON'T OWN NARUTO!

Chapter 1 Is there a plot to this?

"WOW HES PRETTY PISSED", kisame said with a smile, "I've never seen him this pissed since he found out his little brother was being molested by Orochimaru"

"ugh don't even mention that name, who let that freak in with the "gang" anyways hes so gross and hes got a tongue that's so long… ew?", a figure emerged from the shadow, he was fairly tall and well hes just a kid but he looks old.

"both of you shut up…", Itachi said, his sharingan ready to punish those who were foolish enough to not listen to him.

"yeah so anyways, chu been up to shiro?",kisame asked… ignoring itachi.

Before shiro could answer they could feel a dark energy resonating from the corner of the cave… "…oh gentlemen, I told you to shut up… now face the wrath of mangekyou sharingan" as he activated his destructive eyes on the two unsuspecting missing-nins.

Shiro being, well hes not stupid he quickly turned around but kisame on the other hand…

'wow pretty eyes', kisame was entranced by the eyes… "HEY WHAT THE HELL WHERE AM I?"he wondered the colors were all wrong here and why was he tied to a post?

"hello kisame, for 3 days you will be groped by shudders haku" and he left. "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO" as kisame was being groped all over.

A second later kisame returned, tears welled up in his eyes, and he took out his samahada and prepared to charge itachi when suddenly

The 3 members saw 3 chuunins that were coincidentally their size and were passing by their cave.

After the 3 beat the living crap of the chuunins they decided to dress as chuunins of the leaf and sneak into konoha. But kisame complained the whole time wanting to go fishing.

"I can't believe you talked us into doing this itachi", as kisame was walking towards konoha.

"…" which kisame being with him for some time now was able to successfully translate to "I need to talk to her and I need to know why she did this to me…" Itachi's inner itachi (yes he has an inner itachi) is raging saying, "FK my EYES HURT"

"hmm this is a good plan though" the akatsuki's taijutsu specialist said, "we pose as leaf chuunins and we will be able to kidnap that naruto punk"

"…", but shiro not knowing itachi too long just walked by

"SHIRO YOU FOOL, don't ignore itachi-san", kisame said in a panic, "he told you that naruto was not our objective, it is the female"

"what? You wanna go there because you are some love sick dog?", shiro's eyebrows were now twitching with anger,'god I hate them, I should have just stayed in the cloud village goddamn it'

"…yes", he replied as if he had nothing left in this world, "she was my everything and now shes gone, I have to kill her now."

They both looked at each other silently, their facial expression said 'if he killed his whole clan, what are the chances of us not dying?'

So the 3 akatsuki members silently walked up to konoha dressed as chuunins.

a scream

kisame and shori looked at each other and they quickly saw what was going on. 2 chuunins of the leaf one tall and lanky and the other rat like was harassing a female genin.

"hey baby, don't be down that your not a chuunin, if you can't be a chuunin we'll put some chuunin in you", as the chuunin said with a hentai grin on his face

The rat boy spoke but shiro swore he was just squeaking, thus proving how much of an idiot he was.

"I'm sorry gentlemen but I as a gentleman cannot let this go on any further" with that he vanished and appeared in front of the chuunins, "you trash! I cannot let you harm such a hot girl! Prepare for your punishment"

Shiro utterly beat the kids into the ground, being a taijutsu specialist and the fact that he was blessed with insane strength didn't really help those poor chuunin punks.

"are you okay?"shiro asked, he eyed the girl up and down and he noticed that those punks had ripped some of her shirt and he could see boobs. 'wow for a genin she sure developed quickly' and a perverted smile found its way on his face.

Shiro quickly turned around and stopped his nosebleed before the poor girl could see, 'damn these thoughts of hot sex with her' he sort of mumbled out loud.

The girl now nervous as hell said, "umm thanks?"

Shiro just walked away trying his best to keep it in his pants when the girl had come up from behind and hit him in the back of his head. 'SUCH INSOLENCE I'LL CRUSH THA--- BOOBS drool' was all he could think of

He was finally able to utter the words, "ow…ch"

"don't just leave a defenseless girl by herself you know!", she told him with a matter of factly voice. Now blushing she said, "what kind of gentleman are you and plus since you saved me I have to do whatever you want me to do to repay my debt"

The only words that got through to shiro's head was 'whatever you want' then he had a billion perverted things pop into his head.

"umm are you ok, and whats your name?" she asked, "my name is chichi"

"oh hello, my name is shiro",he informed her. 'what kind of parent names their daughter 'boobs?'' he thought to himself obviously amused, 'well I gotta admit she was well named…kekekekkee' as his perveted side defeating his gentleman side.

"umm you're weird shiro-senpai",she told him bluntly, 'if hes so weird how come I feel strangely attracted to him? I'm usually attracted to the bad boys but he seems like a momma's boy'

"I'll walk you back to konoha",shiro stated as if it was not up for debate, as they walked shiro had used his free hand to tell itachi and kisame to go on without him.

Itachi rolled his eyes, "what an idiot" and glanced at kisame who was writing something down

"Did you see how smooth he was itachi? MAHN do you remember what he said after she hit him on his head? Damn I was gonna write down his secret", kisame's head drooped and made his way with itachi to konoha.

What secrets and betrayal lie in store for konoha… And do you think Shori will take advantage of the poor genin?