Diary of Draco Malfoy

Another long day, perhaps they are all long and my perception is just changing a bit everyday. I woke this morning to a normal day, it had snowed again almost all night and I hoped Potter hadn't frozen outside in his shack. I went to breakfast hoping to see him there but he was not, and he did not show up at all during the day classes. At lunch I received a letter from father, a letter I am surprised to have not received earlier. One of my house mates had done the expected and written to their parents about what had happened in breakfast the day before and he was demanding to know why I had not been the one to inform him. I could tell he was extremely angry in the way he wrote it, and I know the next time I see him I shall be in a good bit of trouble.

Once in m room I sent him a reply telling him that I did not send the same information as the rest because I knew it would get to him eventually and that if the letter would have been intercepted it would implicate how much information I am giving to him and that it might imply that I am spying. I know it was sort of a lame excuse and I know it wont be accepted but for the moment I am safe from him, but there are only a few weeks left until Christmas Vacation. Time is drawing short and I am assuming that during Christmas I will be required to get the Dark Mark. I am not a fan of pain so I'm afraid of it, also I do not want to be tied to the Dark Lord; I do not want to serve him. I want to be m own master and not have to bow to another.

I have to go to potions now, I'll write more later.

(later)

He came back! Not that I didn't think he would, okay so a part of me thought he wouldn't, but what does it matter? He's back now! I don't even know why I am so exited about his return or why the knowledge that I was the one to influence his decision in doing so lifts my sprits and confuses me.

At dinner this evening, while everyone was about half way through eating, and I was listening to Blaze tell a dirt joke to Crabbe and Goyle, he walked in through the large double doors. It was a moment before I noticed him but silence slowly fell over the entire hall and all heads were slowly turning to stare in his direction. A few people stood up to get a better look. But there he was, just standing there glaring ahead at the teacher's table in the front of the hall. I looked back and forth between him and the table seeing that his eyes were locked with those of Professor Dumbledores.
He was angry, it radiated around him like a force field and I wondered for a moment if he was going to try and attack the old head master. He started walking and stopped half way to the table when Dumbledore stood up.
"Welcome Back, Mr. Potter" the old man said and I watched Harry thinking that in any moment he was going to explode at him or jump over the table and tackle him. I could see everyone else in the hall watching him as well.

"I will fight your war..old man.." Harry started, talking slowly in an icy tone but loud enough for all of the room to hear, "But I am not doing it for you…or for them.." he said pausing for a moment to glare at Weasley and Granger, Granger had her head in her hands as if ashamed but Weasley had his arm around her and was glaring back at Harry with conviction and equal anger. Harry turned his attention back to the headmaster, "I'm doing this because Voldemort has to die and I have to fight him, and because there are people in this world who are innocent and do not deserve to die b his hands…but you hear me now…Dumbledore …from now on I do this on m own." And with that he turned on his heal and started to leave but stopped at the doorway and turned his head and looked directly at me!
It wasn't for long and I don't think anyone else noticed because then he turned back to face the professors table and raised his right hand. Wordlessly a black object went fling from the headmasters pocket and Harry caught his wand in his out stretched hand. A few people gasped. Only very powerful and highly skilled wizards could use wand less magic. Then he turned and left the Great Hall but where he went I do not know, I can only guess that he returned to the Grffindor tower.
After he left the room of course burst into sound with people talking and I knew that this time I had to write to father and tell him that he was back. I did so after dinner, returning to the Slytherthin common room, I know that the Dark Lord will not be pleased if he ever finds out that I had something to do with making sure he returned safely to school. I must practice m Occulmancy a great deal before Christmas, for if he does find out he will mostlikely kill me, if he can beat my father to it.

Diary of Draco Malfoy

An uneventful week so far, father wrote to me telling me to continue keeping an eye on Potter but what he doesn't understand is that that is a very hard thing to do. Keeping his promise of doing things on his own Harry returned to Gryffindor tower but requested his own private room; I know this through a first year that seemed too frightened of me to not tell me everything he knew. I didn't expect Harry to return to the tower at all, but I guess that was foolish his only friends can't have just been Weasley and Granger. Though I was surprised that the news disappointed me, what did I think that since he was on the outs with everyone that he would suddenly change sides and come and play nice? I guess so. But I guess he thought the same of me.
Toda he showed up to potions, which is extremely shocking, he obviously hates the subject and Snape shows absolutely no love for him. I use to think that his picking on Harry was fun and even entertaining but over the last few years it just got worse and worse and I found that Severus was just being immature.
Well, when Harry walked into the room just before class started I was surprised that Snape did not take of points for being late or anything but I guess he was too stunned that his least favorite student had shown up to his class of his own free will. Everyone was watching him, including myself and was startled as he came and sat beside me. I had forgotten that he and I are potions partners!
I was too surprised I didn't get the chance to think of anything to say but then Snape began the class, giving us the instructions on the board and telling us to begin. Without speaking he pulled out his text book and opened it to the correct page. I watched him out of the corner of m vision for a while, he looked exhausted there were dark circles under his eyes and his hair seemed to hang limply over his brow.
I wanted to say something, and eve started too when Crabbe turned and looked back at me. He glanced at Harry who didn't notice and gave me a short nod which I found strange but returned. Was he watching me or Potter? I wondered. And then I realized that I couldn't just be nice to Harry, that I too was being watched…and that they would notice if I had started to lighten up on him. Through out the entire course of the class we did not say a word to one another and I wondered if he had figured the same thing I had. But then there came a moment when I dropped m quill between us and he moved to pick it up and in handing it back to me our eyes met.
His green eyes were clouded b something I couldn't name and he immediately looked away from me. Did I dream that his cheeks had gone a bit red? Of course I did.

When class ended, the entire thing having gone smoothly, everyone rushed to leave the class room except Harry and I, I wanted to talk to him alone but I saw Goyle, Crabbe, and Blaze waiting for me. I left just as he did but when we got to the door way Goyle pushed into Harry and knocked him directly into me and we fell.
"Watch were you're going, Potter!" Blaze said glaring at him and helping me to m feet. I grimaced, not in pain but knowing that they were expecting something, some cruel line or joke at the fallen Potter, I didn't want to have to…but what choice did I have?
"you can't blame him for being clumsy , he was raised b muggles." I said with a sneer, playing the mask of m 11 ear old self once more and I hoped that Harry could tell how insincere the comment was. But he couldn't he looked up at me as he helped himself to his feet, Crabbe and Goyle chuckling annoyingly behind me. His eyes were cold and I read the hurt with in them, I was betraying him in his eyes. I felt color, what little I have, drain from m face. Just when he had started to think I was different than before I do a 180 on him.
"Get out of my way, Malfoy." he said between clinched teeth and then gathered his fallen book bag and pushed past me and between the still laughing monkeys.
"You just going to let him walk away?" Blaze asked me and I winced a bit. Turing back after him I saw for the first time that a few people from the class room had stopped to see what was going on including Weasle and Granger.
"Come on..." I said darkly to m so called friends, "He's not even worth it." I said loudly then turned down the opposite hall and walked away, just hoping that the other Slytherins would follow, luckily they did.