Description: SPOILERS for ROTS! Anakin's thoughts as he watches the love of his life being buried at her funeral. This is my first fanfic ever. Please review!
Disclaimer: I own nothing in this fan fiction.
Forever In Darkness
My love, my wife,
I awoke to the terrible truth that you are no longer among the living. I dropped to my knees and wept. How could this be? You were alive just a moment ago. I felt you in a sweet embrace. But then the terrible truth sets in. I did it. I killed you. I wanted so much to protect you that my greed led to your destruction.
Now I watch from the shadows as your body is led to its final resting place. I long to run over to your sweet body and embrace it one last time. To feel you against me. To taste your sweet lips. To look upon your beautiful face before it is buried in the dark forever. But I must not. I must stay in the dark. I must hide behind this mask which hides my deformed face, and my love for you.
I notice in your pale hands you are holding the Japor necklace I gave you long ago. It fills me with happiness to know that you loved me so much. It also saddens me for I will never be able to show you how much I love ever again.
What have I done? I can't live without you. I need you. I don't care about life anymore. I have so much power, but I would give it all up if it meant that I could hold and kiss you one last time.
Do you remember our first kiss by the lake in Naboo? My heart aches at the memory of it. The touch of your skin. The taste of your lips. The warmth of your body. Those memories will haunt me forever.
I can't live without you. I want to end this thing that I call life now. But I can't. I must live, for our son's sake.
Our son. Those words bring warmth to my cold heart. I have felt his presence in the force. I must protect him from my master, at least until he is the right age to do what I could never do. Destroy the dark side. By doing so though, I shall not see him grow up. For if I ever saw him my master would find him and surely end his life. So I promise to you Padme, I will protect our son as best I can., even if it means simply staying away from him.
I wish I could go back in time and undo all the things I have done. I wish I listened to you and left behind everything to raise our son with you. But I was a fool. I was seduced by the dark side.
The dark side is so powerful. I can feel the good in me drain from my heart. Soon I will be nothing but Darth Vader. When you are in your final resting place, the good in me will be gone forever. Like you, never to be seen again.
Oh my love, I need you here with me. If it wasn't for that bastard Obi Wan you probably would still be here with me. Wait a minute, he is the reason that you are not here with me. He made you betray me. He played with your mind to get to me. It's not my fault. How could I be so blind? It's all his fault. All I wanted to do was protect you. He wanted power over me. He wanted to make me suffer for being better than he was. He went through you to get to me. Obi even used our son to get to me. He took our son from us, and now I won't be able to see him until he is the right age. I see now that I must bring our son to the dark side. It is his only chance.
I wish you were still here my love. But really, how can you be dead when you're still in my heart. I shall always think of you. I will never forget you. You can count on that. Everyday I will be reminded that you are not with me, and that I will have to wait to see your beautiful face again. I just hope you'll wait for me. Please wait for me.
They lower your body into the ground and cover it with dirt. Tears stream down my face. I have now died. You were my life, and because you have died I have died to. I am no longer Anakin Skywalker. All the good in me has died with you. Now all I am is Darth Vader.
I promise you this my love, I shall avenge your death. The next time Obi Wan and I meet I shall do to him what he has done to you.
My love, my heart, my life, I ache for you now. I long to be near you, but you are gone and there is noting I can do about that. So I will live my life the only way I know how to now that you are gone. In darkness. Forever in darkness.