Note: Sorry I haven't uploaded anything in a while... computer problems! Still having them, but figured a way around them for the moment. All it took was three computers and email to get the story from one computer to the one I needed. Hope you enjoy.
The small caravan came upon a frozen lake and everyone knew it would be dangerous to cross. Ice always looked thicker than it actually was. Laney was feeling much better than the first night she was free from the tomb she was in at Marius' estate. She had been riding since mid-morning with Lancelot staying close by her side. If he rode away for any reason, one of the others immediately took his place. She wasn't sure if it was intentional or not, but it did seem to occur like clockwork. But she didn't feel anger at Lancelot this time. She had been marked for death when he found her. But she was sure she would have been tortured before it came to that. Guinevere had been.
She sat beside Lancelot as the knights surveyed the frozen lake. Arthur sat surveying for only a moment after Tristan told him there was no other way around, then he sent Jols back to tell the people to get out of the wagons and spread out. They would be crossing the lake after all. She looked around at the faces of the other knights. She could see that they were all worried, even Tristan. As she was looking at him, he looked over and looked at her. She tried to smile and he just looked away. He hadn't said anything to her since she was found, and he hadn't stopped by to see if she was alright. His distance bothered her, but since there was nothing she could do about it, she filed it back in her mind to deal with later.
The group had been walking slowly across the ice when the sound of Saxon drums grew louder. The knights slowly looked at each other and stopped walking. Arthur asked them for their opinions and they all decided they would fight. He began giving orders to some of the villagers as Jols and a few of the men started getting the weapons spread out across the ice so the knights could get to whatever they needed as quickly as possible. Laney dismounted and Lancelot walked over, "No, you go with the rest. We'll catch up as soon as we're through here." She started to protest, but he took her by the shoulders, "Please don't argue with me. I will make them tie you in the wagon if need be. I will not lose you again."
Tears began to form in her eyes and she quickly blinked them away. "Lancelot, I don't want to lose you either. Please be careful. I love you." He kissed her gently and held her for a moment, then she climbed back onto her horse and rode away from the battle scene. When she had gone around the bend so that he could not see her, she stopped and watched the last of the people walk past her. She would not enter the battle, but she would not leave not knowing if he was safe or not. As she sat there listening to the drums, she realized that they had stopped. She knew the army was facing the seven knights and Guinevere. She closed her eyes and tried to imagine the scene that was playing out just beyond her sight. Then she remembered what her mother had told her.
She climbed off her horse and let the reins drop to the ice. Closing her eyes, she said aloud, "Goddess, I beseech thee, help me save these brave people. They are putting themselves in danger to save the lives of people that mean nothing to them other than they are human. I cannot allow them to die when their freedom is so close." She kept her eyes closed and listened to the sounds around her. She took a deep breath and let it out slowly. Taking another breath, she felt a sudden rush run through her body. Her blood seemed to be as cold as the water under the ice. She felt the blood course through her veins beginning with her feet and moving up. When it reached her head, she opened her eyes and found that she could see everything that was happening beyond the turn in the ice. How, she didn't understand, but it wasn't the same as normal sight. Everything had an ethereal quality to it.
She saw Tristan and Bors shoot at the Saxons. Then the Saxons began marching toward them. She began slowly moving toward the bend, looking down she saw that her feet were not touching the ice. She was floating just inches above it. She willed her feet to touch down and found they did. Surprised, she looked at the advancing army and willed the ice to crack under their feet. She saw the crack start just in front of where they were and move slowly toward them. They began to back up a little and look wildly around. The knights continued to fire at the outside of the army. As they did, the other men moved closer together.
Laney raised her arms in front of her as she walked around the bend. Then she brought her hands together to clap loudly once. The ice suddenly broke into large chunks, throwing the enemy into the icy water. She saw that Dag had picked up his axe and was about to run toward the enemy. She waved her hand in his direction and he slipped down before he could leave the line the knights had formed. The enemy was no longer advancing and there was no where for them to cross the ice. From bank to bank, the ice had broken into pieces that were not large enough to walk on. She also saw that as yet, no one had noticed her. She turned around and went back to her horse. She mounted and rode toward the caravan. She would not let the knights know what she had done. As far as they would know, everything had happened as they planned, without any intervention from anyone or anything.
As she rode, she felt the icy flow of her blood begin to warm. The power she had held slowly left her and she sagged in the saddle. Before she caught up with the caravan, she slipped off her horse and landed on the icy ground. Her last thought was that Lancelot was still safe, then she fell into a deep sleep. This is how Tristan found her.
He saw her horse standing next to a small stand of trees. The horse was nudging something lying on the ground. When he got closer he found Laney lying on her side. She didn't move when he climbed off his horse and walked over to her, quickly scanning the trees for any sign of an ambush, he knelt down to check for injuries. When he picked her up, cradling her in his arms, she moaned softly and snuggled into his embrace. For a moment he just watched her peaceful expression, then he noticed a small trickle of blood on the side of her face. He took his finger and wiped the blood away and found it was only a scratch. Taking a deep breath in relief, he pushed her hair away from her face, "Laney, are you hurt?" when she didn't answer, he gently shook her.
Laney opened her eyes to see who was disturbing her sleep, seeing Tristan's face so close made her eyes open wider, "What…?" she began. He quickly interrupted her, "Are you hurt?" he asked in a worried tone. She looked quickly around and realized she was in his arms on the ground. She looked back at him, "No, I don't think so. I remember falling from the horse, then… nothing." They stayed where they were for a minute, just looking into each other's eyes. She saw his head move lower, then he stopped and cleared his throat, "Can you stand?" She slowly nodded and he laid her back down and stood. He reached and helped her up and then helped brush the frosty debris from her clothes.
"What caused you to fall?" he asked in conversation. She put her hand on his to stop him from running it through her hair. They looked at each other and she saw the softness in his eyes that she had noticed once before. She looked away in guilt. Not guilt in her feelings for Tristan, but guilt because she had become another reason he would not search for the love he so deserved. His loyalty to the things he cared for was one of the things she loved about him, but it was also one of the things that had made him withdraw into himself over the last fifteen years. He cupped her chin in his hand, "Don't look so sad, I don't want to be a reason you do not smile." His voice was a whisper. His tone a caress. "Lancelot and the others will be along shortly." His tone changed and seemed to feel the need to reassure her.
"I'm afraid to smile when with you. I don't want to be the reason you feel loneliness when I have found the love I've always dreamed of. Nothing would make me smile more than to see you with the woman you deserve. The woman who will make you smile and look at her with the softness I've just seen in your eyes." She reached up and touched his cheek with the tips of her fingers. He released her chin and took her hand from his cheek and closing his eyes, kissed her palm. "Never fear for me or my happiness." He said aloud then he finished in thought, 'It is as close as it will ever be, within sight but out of reach.' He opened his eyes and she saw the veil of harshness once again fall into place. The mood had been broken and he was once more, Tristan.
He cleared his throat and asked once again, "What caused your fall?" She shook her head, "I don't know, I just felt myself fall asleep and slide off. There was no one around." He could tell she was not telling him the entire story, he had felt something in her earlier, but knew she would not tell unless she wanted to. He nodded and asked, "Can you ride? We'll go back to the others." She nodded and reached to take her horses reins. She mounted and moved beside him. They rode back toward the frozen lake, neither speaking to the other, both lost in their own thoughts.
Laney was remembering the feeling of power she had during the battle. She also remembered the drained feeling she had when the power had left her. She had learned that she did indeed have the ability Merlin and her mother had spoken of, but that ability came with a price. She quickly put her hand to her abdomen. She could feel the presence of her unborn child even though she couldn't physically feel anything yet. Tristan saw her action and asked, "Are you feeling any pain?" She quickly shook her head, "No, I'm fine. I was just thinking about something."
He nodded and returned to watching the trees around them and the thoughts he had been having before she caught his attention. He knew his love for her was hurtful to her. It hurt him more, he thought. Every time he saw her smile at Lancelot was like a dagger in his heart. Especially when she looked at him and he saw the pain in her eyes. He didn't want her sadness or pity. If he couldn't have her love, he wanted her friendship. Her closeness. He wanted to be the one she turned to when she needed to turn to someone. As long as she felt the sadness, she would not turn to him for fear of causing him pain. It was more painful to see her turn away from him. He wanted her to know these things, but wasn't sure how to tell her.
They were both brought out of their thoughts when they came up on the others. Lancelot immediately rode ahead, questioning why Laney was with Tristan. She should have been with the rest of the caravan further ahead. Unless the caravan had moved slower than they should have for some reason. "Laney, why are you here?" he asked her, but he was looking at Tristan. Laney was about to answer when Tristan said, "She had an accident. I found her lying on the edge of the path." He then rode forward to where Arthur was waiting.
Lancelot watched him move away, then he looked at Laney. She reached out and took his hand away from the pommel. "I fell asleep and slid off my horse. I am fine, no injuries, see?" She implored him to look her over as she swept her free hand down the length of her body. She smiled and saw his face soften. "The battle didn't last long, but I'm still glad you weren't there. It would have worried me to think you might be hurt if things had gone differently." They both looked toward Arthur as the rest of the group came up to them. "Laney, Tristan says you had an accident. It is good to see you are unhurt." He spoke directly to her and the rest of the group nodded their agreement. "Thank you, Arthur." She said as she nodded to the rest. "Tristan says there are no problems ahead, so let's get back as soon as we can. The caravan should be just ahead of us now." He motioned forward and the group headed toward the wall.