What Was There All Along

Disclaimer: I own nothing except any OCs.

This chapter isn't very, exciting (sorry) its just a transitional bit, into the rest of the story, but fear not, the next chapter is more exciting! I'll try to post again soon!

At work the next day after the whole 'gossamer' incident, Alec expected Max to be depressed, the not getting rid of the virus thing, probably breaking her heart because she couldn't be with Logan. God knew he'd been up all night thinking of scenarios for their last few minutes of being able to touch talk, and felt like shit because of it. But to his extreme shock Max looked fine, better than fine, she looked like a weight had been lifted off her shoulders, still slightly pale (probably that god-awful morning sickness he had got such a clear view of last week) but she seemed happier than before, still a bit confused, when wasn't she, but definitely calmer, hardly the attitude of a woman who just lost the love of her life…

He had to do a double take to check that he wasn't dreaming, and then when she saw him, and said 'good morning' chirpily, in a very un-Max like way, not avoiding him like the plague, he knew he must have been dreaming, even going so far as to pinch himself to prove it, but he wasn't. Huh? What had happened to the bitch he knew and loved?

Alec was officially very confused now, had they somehow managed to get some in the last 30 seconds of being virus free? Or maybe they found a way round it, didn't seem likely, but what the hell else would be making Max so happy and carefree? Not that Alec wasn't happy to see her that way, she'd been miserable too long and that couldn't be doing the baby any good, but why exactly was she so happy? It made absolutely no sense!

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Max was feeling better than she had done in months, her relationship with Logan was officially over, and she finally had some closure, it was liberating! But apparently, to her great amusement, her good mood was scaring people! They had got so used to the bad mood, the bitchy Max that they didn't quite know what to make of the new 'chirpy' friendly Max. If she had known all she had to do was be nice to people to freak them out she would have done it months ago, it was worth it for the entertainment value alone!

Sure Max was sad that what she had with Logan was over, but realistically it had been over for months now, and maybe, just maybe, Max was ready to admit it was convenient to hide behind feeling for Logan to avoid having to deal with feelings for Alec…She was still working on the whole denial thing she'd had going on now for a while, but she was starting to see that that might be the case, question was could she trust Alec? And wasn't it just typical that Max had to do things in reverse, surely you were meant to decide if a guy was trustworthy father material, before you got knocked up by him? Well that just proved how impossibly screwed her life was!

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His curiosity winning out over his survival instincts, Alec finally decided to talk to Max about her drastic change in attitude, probably not one of his brighter ideas, but he was, after all, part cat and so couldn't resist the curiosity.

Approaching her casually, he leaned back against the lockers whilst she rummaged around in her own locker for lip gloss, or whatever it was girls always seemed to need from their lockers.

"So," he began with apparent nonchalance, "what's with the good mood? After what happened yesterday I figured you'd be off crying somewhere." he sniped, trying to pretend that he could really care less about her answer, "Not that I don't like this new caring gentler Max, but you're starting to freak me out." he admitted, shocked to see, that Max actually looked amused by his concern, well that was certainly not the reaction he was expecting!

"I'm just glad that I got a few things straight yesterday, that's all." stated Max calmly.

"So you and Logan sorted things out then?" asked Alec, genuinely puzzled by Max's reactions, shouldn't she be more upset?

"You could say that." admitted Max, finally seeming somewhat sad about whatever had happened, "It's over.", she finally admitted, so quietly that he almost didn't here her.

"Over?" questioned Alec, not sure if he could trust his ears, Max and Logan were really over, how did that happen?

"Yeah," she conceded, staring fixedly at a crack in the tiles on the floor, rather than at him, she sighed tiredly, slamming her locker and shouldering her bag, "I realised that I can't keep putting my life on hold, or his." She looked genuinely saddened by the realisation, and it pulled at Alec's heart to se her so lost, "I mean what kind of life could we have had anyway?" she continued, her voice growing in strength as she spoke, "This virus isn't going anywhere and I don't want to accidentally kill him or anything. Truth is, I guess it's been over for a while now, I just didn't want to accept it." she admitted.

"Okay." Alec conceded, so shocked by her revelation that he was surprised he could still string together coherent sentences, he could have danced he was so happy, Max and Logan were over! And maybe, just maybe he had a shot! But he was still her friend, first and foremost, and she was probably hurting, so for now he had to push his own feelings aside and think about her, he needed to know what was going on in her head. "But then why so chirpy? You've been smiling like a Cheshire cat since you got in." he continued, still confused by Max's previous good mood.

"I don't know." confessed Max, gnawing on her lip uncertainly in an endearing way that just made Alec want to kiss her, "I guess its just, not having all that stress hanging over my head anymore." She smiled, "It still hurts, we were close for a long time, and I still care for him, just only as a friend now," what is it Alec's imagination or was she emphasising that fact more than was natural? Nah, "but it's like I finally have some closure now ya know?", she questioned, cocking her head beseechingly at him.

"Yeah, I know Max," admitted Alec, grudgingly, he didn't like digging up the past, but this was kinda how he had felt when Rachel died, sure there had been a lot of grief, it hurt, still did actually, he had loved her after all, but the closure of knowing that it was really over did give him some measure of peace too, it had helped him to move on, and realise what he felt for Max…

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At his admission, Max smiled at him, heart meltingly, apparently glad that someone understood what she meant, but, as her irritating inner voice informed her, 'doesn't he always?', even her conscious mind had to admit that he usually did. He understood her better than practically everyone, probably even better than OC, a somewhat frightening thought!

He didn't dig into last nights events anymore than that though, telling her to call if she ever needed him, and that'd he'd always be around if she wanted someone to talk to, but then leaving her alone with her thoughts. How was it that he always seemed to know exactly what she needed from him? He never crowded her, as Logan often had, just let her tell him what she wanted to in her own time, but conversely, not letting something drop, going after it with tenacity and determination if he knew that she was holding back anything important. He really was a paradox, a man of contradictions, always saying one thing and doing another, never half as self centred as he made himself out to be.

He had also been being surprisingly sweet about her and Logan's break up, another unknown facet of his personality, not gloating or saying 'I told you so' as he could have done, surprising her once again with his sensitivity to her feelings, how come she had never noticed how sweet he could be before? Maybe she just hadn't given him a chance to show it, she'd labelled him as one thing, and been completely unwilling to see him as anything else, it was only after the whole Rachel debacle that she even realised how much he kept hidden from her, how much she still didn't know about her knew friend, the man who was now the father of her child…

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Alec had been surprised to hear about Max and Logan's break up, to say the least, he didn't think that it was a bad thing, far from it, he was relieved that that train wreck of a relationship was over, it had been making Max miserable for too long, now she could move on, and who knew, maybe even to him, stranger things had happened, and he was now convinced that she did care for him a bit, so maybe? Yeah right, but hey, a guy could dream!

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Logan meanwhile was having more trouble accepting the break up than either of the transgenics. He was convinced that Max had just done it because of fear of the virus, and if he could just get rid of that everything would be alright between them again. He just couldn't see that maybe this relationship wasn't meant to be and was determined to win Max back…

He therefore kept calling her, and going to Crash in the hopes of being able to speak to her, but Max was avoiding him, and strangely even Alec seemed to be nowhere in sight when he was around, the guy was even useless for relaying messages!

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Max herself however, was starting to get back into a routine, it was hard, not seeing Logan anymore. He had been such a big part of her life for so long, that it was weird not being with him all the time, but she was dealing, moving on with her life… she just wished that Logan would do the same…

As it was Logan was calling her everyday, and had taken to staking out places like Crash in hopes of running into her, fortunately he wasn't very good at it, and she always saw him coming in time to make her escape. She knew that this situation couldn't go on forever, and he deserved to hear from her, not someone else about the baby so she would have to talk to him eventually, just not yet… She needed time, and space to sort her head out, Alec got it, so why couldn't Logan? She needed to distance herself from Logan, and what they had once shared before they got into a post mortem of the relationship, and the inevitable slanging match which was bound to follow his discovery of her pregnancy, she needed time to prepare herself for the fallout, she knew she didn't have a lot of it, but surely she was entitled to some?

Alec meanwhile had become a rock for her in a time of need, always there to talk to, about serious stuff, or the mindless witty banter she loved to engage in with him. She still hadn't really discussed with him about what they were going to do about the baby, but he was being frighteningly understanding about the whole thing, allowing her space, but also never straying far, always being close enough to protect her, if the need arose. It should have been irritating the hell out of her, it wasn't…

Truthfully she had missed the feeling of security which came from knowing that your unit had your back, Max hadn't felt it in a very long time, and when she'd first escaped, it had been that which had hurt most, the isolation from her own kind, seemingly surrounded by the enemy… It was one of the reasons why she never slept for long, though she would deny it if asked, the truth was, she could never lower her guard enough to sleep properly, the only time she had recently had been during that infamous heat…with Alec…

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Unfortunately for Max however her new routine had something that she really didn't enjoy, morning sickness, but it was there, regular as clockwork, and had also taken to manifesting itself during late morning as well, at Jam Pony…

It was also not going unnoticed by her colleagues that she had suddenly developed the urge to heave every morning, and she once again found herself and Alec to be the subjects of work place gossip. Unfortunately for once the gossips were actually right about what was wrong with her, a fact which would normally have amused her considering how far off they usually were about everything, but under the circumstances she did not find the situation amusing at all.

Thank God for Alec though, she never thought that she would ever think it, but it was true. He was there with her, every morning, holding her and soothing her until the nausea abated for the day, a fact which was only helping to fuel the spread of the gossip, but for once Max really didn't care what people thought. As long as Alec was with her she felt alright, the sickness was horrible, but she was calmer when she knew he was there, like when back at Manticore when she had been ill she had felt calm and safe knowing that her unit were taking turns guarding her despite the fact that they were disobeying orders to do it, they never left her to suffer alone, and Alec didn't either, a fact that she was very grateful for, even if the 'condition' was partly his fault.

Finally, after six consecutive mornings of nausea at Jam Pony Max had bitten the bullet and told Normal that she was pregnant. To say he was not happy would have been an understatement, Max honestly thought that he was gonna have a coronary, there was definitely a vein popping very ominously in his temple, and that was even before he knew who the father was. When Alec, who was there for moral support, and because he was partially responsible for the situation, told him that it was his kid Normal actually fainted, just keeled over in shock, not being able to conceive of 'Missy-miss' and his 'golden boy' it would have been hysterical had Max not been worried that he was about to fire her. But Alec came through, talking Normal round, and convincing him not to spread the word yet, they would tell people, those who hadn't already guessed, in their own time. He even convinced Normal to offer Max a temporary job helping in dispatch when she couldn't go on runs anymore. How Alec managed it Max would never know, one minute she thought that Normal was gonna kill her for touching his 'golden boy' the next he was practically kissing her hand, which was, come to think of it, probably more worrying, she had to agree with Original Cindy, the 'hold' Alec had over Normal was 'down right worrying' but for once she was actually grateful for it. She had managed to come out of the other side of this confrontation still with a job, an impressive feat! But now she was somewhat running out of reasons not to tell Logan, she was gonna have to do it soon… Oh joy!

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