Kathryn was working in her ready room early the next morning. The gamma shift crew had run a ship wide systems check, and it was her habit to know the exact condition of her ship. Kathryn read every report as it came in.
Eventually a lull came in her morning reading. Her thoughts soon turned to what Chakotay had told her the night before. Pulling up numerous Starfleet Intelligence files she began to investigate.
Her head hurt. Her second cup of coffee was empty, and she could not connect the dots between any Starfleet Intelligence files on the Cardassians with any Maquis informants. Staring at the list of file names uncovered no secrets. With only six hours sleep and two hours of reading padds, her instincts were a sluggish.
Rising from her desk, Kathryn stretched out her back, and checked the time. She had ordered a senior staff meeting at 0830 and the time was approaching. With fifteen minutes to spare, Kathryn decided the throbbing in her head was worth a visit to sickbay.
The ready room door chimed.
"Enter," she commanded, still rubbing the small of her back with one hand.
"Captain. Here are the reports from Security." Tuvok handed her a padd.
Kathryn Janeway managed to maintain her calm command exterior, but her stomach threatened to revolt. She looked a little like she had been sucking lemons. Taking the padd, she asked, "Where do we stand right now?"
"All Starfleet command codes have been re-initialized on primary and secondary systems. However, Seska was invasive in her methods of compromising our security. It will take time to find every sub-system that she has infiltrated."
"Invasive. Yes, she certainly was that. Tuvok, please have a seat." Kathryn slumped back into her own chair. "I have been wondering about something. Maybe you can help. If, and that is only if, Starfleet was pressured by the Cardassians to send Voyager after Liberty, what would have been there motivation?"
"Liberty was very successful in a number of skirmishes against the Cardassians. Perhaps they had grown tired of loosing their own vessels, and decided to use their leverage with the Federation."
"But what other reasons there might be? I want all of them, even ideas that are as yet unsubstantiated."
Tuvok thought for a moment and said, "The Cardassian torture records."
Kathryn was intrigued. "Tell me more."
"Before I was assigned to infiltrate Liberty, Chakotay had left her for a time. Some valued Maquis leaders were taken prisoner. Chakotay and others, one, Ro Loren, was a graduate from his Advanced Tactical class, joined together to infiltrate the Cardassian prison. They were successful and also gained some strategic files in the process. There were rumors that the team also took a database full of Cardassian torture records. I overheard Seska asking Chakotay about it, but there was positively no evidence and Chakotay flatly denied it. In the end, it appeared to be nothing more than a rumor."
Kathryn frowned. She had her answer but did not let on. "Thank you, Tuvok. But if you think of anything else, do let me know."
"Of course."
Glancing at her chronometer, she added, "It is time for us to be going."
One of the things Kathryn did at the morning's meeting was hand over the responsibility of the funeral to Commander Chakotay. All four of the deceased, including Seska, were originally Maquis. She asked the senior staff to inform Chakotay if there was anyone in particular that they should plan to have speak for the individuals who had died.
Tuvok volunteered to share with the crew from his knowledge of Lon Suder's progress, and Chakotay said he already knew who would want to speak for the others.
At 1500 the next day the crew gathered for the funeral service. Chell did the eulogy for Hogan. Tuvok followed and spoke highly of Lon Suder's desire to do something for the ship and his overall progress before he died. Sam Wildman shared about the assistance Crewman Kirch, as a fellow science officer, provided her during her last trimester and what good friend he had become her.
Commander Chakotay put an arm around Wildman and thanked her. Sam gratefully stepped aside allowing the commander to conclude the service.
"Suder, Hogan, Kirch. We fought some atrocious battles together against the Cardassians. We took some substantial risks, and we always knew we might die in battle." Chakotay's voice became more reflective. "Almost expected it, except, none of us could have foreseen this battle."
Clearing his throat, Commander Chakotay surveyed the room. "When I resigned Starfleet to join the Maquis, I never would have guessed that a Cardassian would want to kill me, or any of us, for putting a Starfleet uniform back on. But many of the former Maquis, can tell you that is what Seska has done, and that's what made the Maquis her enemy. In the Alpha Quadrant it appeared that the Maquis were the Cardassian's enemy, but for one Cardassian in the Delta Quadrant, we see it's the Federation that she hated.
"Under the Starfleet-Cardassian treaty, Seska could have sought immunity from Captain Janeway when we boarded Voyager. Given that we were stranded in the Delta Quadrant, she could have requested that her Cardassian physiology remain concealed for the sake of her personal safety. And, according to Starfleet regulations, the captain and doctor would have been obligated to honour that request. But that was not what Seska wanted. She wanted a Maquis mutiny, but she couldn't have that. The Maquis wouldn't give it to her.
"For the rest of us the Delta Quadrant brought us together. As our two crews became one, we found out what we were made of. We've been tested in battle and in our loyalties, and we have had some surprises. Jonas, once loyal to the Maquis cause, chose to work with Seska. While Lon Suder, who seemed loyal to no one, died to put us back on this vessel.
"Indeed, we all have had to make choices, and in those choices we have found out who our friends are and who they are not. Today, we say good-bye to three good friends whose contribution to our lives and to this ship will not be forgotten. But, we also say good-bye to Seska, one who has tested the integrity and character of this crew. My consolation today is in knowing how well this crew has passed the test."
Chakotay look around the room at Paris, Tuvok, and Janeway, as he said, "When we came together two years ago, I didn't know who I could trust. Today, I am strengthened by the knowledge that in this room and on this ship we all are among friends. It is in the knowledge of this crew's strength and reliability that I find the confidence to say that no matter what the Delta Quadrant has to throw at us, Kazon, Vidian, or anything else, with all of us working together, and the help of new friends," He nodded towards Kes and Neelix, "we will prevail."
Chakotay paused to give the crew a moment of reflection, "And we will remember the friends we've lost along the way. Release the pods."
The familiar whistle sliced the air, and the crew turned to watch four pods jettisoned from Voyager. The ships close proximity to a red giant made the black pods visible for only a short duration.
Once formal service was over, the crew broke off into small groups. Neelix had refreshments prepared for the gathering.
Captain Janeway approached Tuvok. As he turned to her, she commented, "Thank you for sharing about Lon Suder. I think it helped the whole crew, to hear about the progress he was making."
Tuvok agreed, "It was progress well worth mentioning." Looking across the room at Chakotay, he added, "Captain, I was uncertain about your decision to have Commander Chakotay preside over this service; but I must say, having heard his closing sentiments, it was a wise choice."
"Thank you, Tuvok. I was hoping that Chakotay's perspective might bolster moral and solidify unity." Kathryn smiled.
"It appears your hopes have been satisfied on both counts."
Tuvok observed the captain as she appeared to be deep in thought.
Chakotay stood across the room with Gerron, and Kathryn watched their conversation. The young Bajoran talked while the commander listened intently. Chakotay squeezed the young man's shoulder and replied. Gerron looked up at the commander and smiled. The young man was maturing and developing more confidence on board Voyager. She was pleased to see him responding favourably to her first officer's encouragement.
As B'Elanna approached the captain and Tuvok, she noticed where Janeway was looking. Tuvok and B'Elanna acknowledged each other silently and both waited for the captain.
Kathryn admired Chakotay as he moved among another group of crew members. Many of them were Maquis, but she noted that even those who had the hardest time adjusting were, now, mixed with her original Starfleet crew.
When Chakotay put a hand on Mariah Henley's shoulder, she turned and gave him a quick hug. Kathryn imagined Henley was updating Chakotay on an old story the group was sharing because he chuckled.
His laugh reminded her of the intimate conversation they shared over the bottle of Romulan Ale. Never had she spent time in his quarters quite like that and it proved to be an eye-opener. She was comfortable there, more comfortable than she had been anywhere in a long time. His quarters had the feel of her favorite coffee shop in San Francisco, the kind of place she could just be, and be herself. If she could just choose to let go and not be captain for a while, he knew how to let her. Kathryn dreamed of letting herself receive the comfort that could be found regularly listening to that laugh, in the privacy of her first officer's quarters.
Until now, she knew she needed Chakotay. She learned that she could trust him, and she enjoyed his company. But now, thinking about the Academy instructor who had wanted a family, the angry warrior who killed to defend his people, and watching the effective leader who swallowed his own pain to build the moral of their crew, Kathryn knew she loved him.
Suddenly, aware of those near her, Kathryn looked at Tuvok and B'Elanna. Unsure of how long B'Elanna was standing there, or if either had been able to read her thoughts, the captain was momentarily embarrassed. Recovering, she said, "Yes, he did a fine job. I must go get something to drink. Please, excuse me."
B'Elanna could not hide her surprised expression. Tuvok raised one eyebrow. Both stood in silence. It's hard to think of a change of topic, when both were convinced that the captain had just fallen in love with her first officer.
Kathryn got herself a cup of coffee and walked over to Chakotay. Her approaching presence dispersed a couple of the people he was talking to. Only time in command taught her to get used to that, but today it held an advantage.
Mariah Henley and Chell remained. Chakotay filled her in on the story about Hogan and Kathryn politely listened while Henley told the rest. She was pleased to see them so naturally converse with her, so she listened to another story before ending the conversation as only a captain can.
"Commander," Janeway spoke officially into a quiet moment in the conversation, Chell and Henley casually slipped into another group nearby.
"Yes, Captain." He said giving her his undivided attention. Unconsciously, he placed his hand on her by the elbow and they walked away from the crowd.
"I wanted to talk to you about an important matter."
"Oh?"
"Yes, a database."
His eyes were wide, astonished at the speed with which she uncovered his secret. "A database?"
"A Cardassian database," Kathryn explained.
"No such thing," he denied flatly.
"There is no such thing as a Cardassian database?" Kathryn played incredulous.
Realizing what he said, all Chakotay could do was laugh. He stared into her clever blue eyes and laughed. She had him, and despite himself he loved it when Kathryn had him. When she did, he was still safe and even Chakotay, the angry warrior needed to feel safe.
Kathryn saw that he trusted her. She knew she had his devotion, even his love, but after how Seska hurt him, winning his trust was a greater honor. Her eyes smiled, her expression, softer than usual.
Seeing her countenance, Chakotay began to think, maybe just maybe there, was a chance. He grinned at the possibility.
Kathryn melted his and said, "Let's go for a walk."