Turn My 6's to 9's

Chapter 8: Against will, reason, and character

"What do you think?" Beth asked, modeling her outfit for the evening for Carla. "Too much?" The dress was a light, airy summer dress patterned with flowers. It wasn't tight or short but nonetheless was still sexy.

"It's perfect."

Beth eyed her reflection doubtfully in the full-length mirror. "It's a little low cut," she said, hiking up the neckline, which then slid back into place only a moment later.

Carla stood with her hands on her hips. "So what? Your boobs are great; show 'em off!"

"I don't want to look like Lydia," Beth began, but Carla cut her off with laughter.

"Lydia would try to wear a scrunchy as a top. You're fine," she reassured Beth. "Plus, there will be eligible men around, you know. Maybe you "don't like Will"," she air-quoted. "But that doesn't mean you need to dress like you live in a convent. You have to wear something fabulous and flirty for your last night here."

Beth had to admit that Carla had impeccable taste in clothing and had never steered her wrong before. She pictured a handsome stranger buying her a drink and smiled. That wouldn't be so bad, would it? She turned to check out her reflection in the mirror again. She turned, first one way and then the other, looking at her reflection from different angles, putting her hair up and then down. The dress really did accentuate her figure nicely. "I'll just wear flats with it…"

"Ha!" Carla said loudly, with triumph, before heading to the bathroom to get herself ready. Carla was wearing gold gladiator sandals that laced up her slender legs and another romper, this one a pretty olive color. She'd pinned her braids up into an elaborate twist, and Beth thought she looked amazing.

Rich had texted a few hours earlier, to Carla's delight, to invite them both out for drinks at the bourbon bar he had mentioned the night before. He and Will were both going, which caused a roil of confusion in Beth's gut. She was excited because she'd never been out in D.C. before, and she was nervous because she still didn't know what to think about Will. All her musing the night before had gotten her nowhere closer to understanding her own feelings. Like it or not, if she wanted Carla to get to spend any time with Rich, it appeared that she'd have to accept being around Will, too.

Before they walked out the door, Beth showed Carla her fake I.D., as she wasn't 21, and Carla laughed at the picture.

"Where did you get this?" she asked, still laughing hysterically.

"Lydia," Beth had to admit. She'd never used it before, and she knew the reason Carla was laughing was because the picture looked nothing like her. "Do you think it will work?" she asked nervously. How embarrassing to get to the bar only to be denied entrance in front of everyone.

"Only one way to find out."

The bouncer stared at Beth's face for a few seconds before looking back to the face on the I.D., and then he ogled her chest for another 10 seconds before letting her inside. Beth gave a small humph, but ultimately decided that she wasn't above using her physical attributes in order to get in the bar. Good thing Carla had made her wear the dress, after all.

The bar had wood floors and tables finished with dark metal. The lights were dim and indie rock played in the background. There were people spread all around at long tables and at the bar watching a few of the televisions. Everyone looked...cool, she decided. Like an ad in a magazine. The women had on fashionable shoes and coordinated outfits, and she noticed several men wearing skinny jeans, flannels, and beanies, despite the heat of the summer. Hipsters, she thought, rolling her eyes.

Rich and Will were at a high-top table near a pair of dart boards. Rich waved them over as he spotted them, and Beth was relieved to find that Will's normal, everyday clothes didn't have nearly the effect on her as his suit. Rich stood and gave Carla a big hug as a greeting. Beth was surprised when he hugged her as well, but he smelled nicely like soap and something else that was just him, and he didn't try to hold on too long. Rich smiled while ushering them onto their barstools. This time she did end up directly across from Will.

"Why is everyone here dressed like they're in a lumberjack competition?" Beth asked with feigned confusion.

"It's the bourbon," Rich said with a laugh. "Draws them like little flies to honey. Now, questionable summer outfits aside, this place is amazing," Rich said with animation as he handed them drink menus.

Beth noticed that there were no prices next to any of the drinks and braced herself for an expensive bill at the end of the night. She'd only be able to afford one or two. There was a list of bourbons and whiskeys and then a list of cocktails on the last page. She'd never heard of half the ingredients in the drinks, but what she saw coming out of the bar on the waiters' trays looked almost like works of art with all their different glasses, colors, and rim accessories. She picked randomly from the list, feeling a little lost and like some dumb high school kid who was out of her league.

A waitress swung by the table to take their drink orders, and she noticed the waitress eye Will for a moment longer than everyone else, but his order was perfunctory and polite, and then he turned his attention back to Rich so quickly that there was no mistaking his lack of interest. Beth had to hide a smirk. Typical.

She was impressed by how quickly Rich and Carla had picked up their flirty banter with almost no awkwardness between them. It was a master class in flirtation, and Beth felt like she should be taking notes. Beth wasn't excluded from their conversation, but while they waited for their first drinks, Carla and Rich were absorbed in each other. Her half of the table was noticeably quiet, and she nonchalantly looked across the table, wanting to get a look at Will's expression. He met her gaze and one side of his mouth turned up into a wry smile, mirroring her own feelings of tagging along on someone else's date, but he didn't say anything. If she wanted conversation, she'd have to start it herself, or try to get a word in with Carla and Rich. Maybe she'd try after her first drink.

The waitress returned. Rich and Will both had tumblers with dark amber liquid. Carla's came in a martini glass and was pale white with a curled lemon rind on the rim. Beth's drink was...well...pink. Very pink. It had a slice of watermelon as the garnish. Carla laughed at her expression of surprise and then raised her glass so that the four of them could cheers. She clinked her glass and made eye contact with each person, looking quickly away from Will. One small sip from her drink and she knew she wouldn't be able to finish it. It was sickly sweet. What a waste of money, she thought to herself, pulling the watermelon off the rim to eat. She felt disappointed to have picked the wrong thing when she knew how expensive it was. She slid it over to Carla, indicating that she could have hers as well.

"Don't like it?" Rich asked.

"No; it's pure sugar. But I guess that's what I get for blindly ordering off the menu," she said sadly. Their waitress was nowhere in sight, and as the establishment was busy and they had just gotten their drinks, Beth thought it would be a while before she came back.

"Try mine," Rich said kindly. "If you like it, we can share until our server comes back."

Beth smiled happily at him, but that only lasted until she had taken her first sip of his drink. He and Will both laughed at the way her face involuntarily screwed up at the taste.

"Is that bourbon?" she asked incredulously. "It's awful."

"Scotch," Rich corrected, still laughing at her disgusted expression. She took a bite of her watermelon just to get the taste out of her mouth. The drink had burned back of her throat on the way down.

"Good to know that there are still worse things than that pink monstrosity I ordered," she said.

"It's good!" Carla interjected, having just taken a sip of it. "Like a Popsicle."

Beth shook her head at that and then was surprised to see Will push back from their table to stand.

"What would you like? I'll go order it from the bar."

Beth gaped at him, caught off guard, and glanced at his drink which was still full. He was going just for her, then. She felt a blush creep up on her cheeks.

"That's okay, really," she said. "You don't have to do that."

"Nonsense," Rich interjected. "You can't sit here without a drink while we're all enjoying ours."

"Honestly, it's okay. I can wait," she protested. She'd imagined going to the bar and having a nice young man buy her a drink. She didn't think it was going to be Will.

"It's not a big deal," Will said, and Beth felt it would be silly to keep protesting further. If he wanted to do it, she'd have to let him. But she didn't like the idea of owing him money.

"I'll buy your next one then. How about that?" she asked Will, and he smiled.

"If you want to, sure. What would you like?" he asked again, and Beth quickly scanned the menu. Like the first time, nothing jumped out at her. She didn't want to waste any more of Will's time as he stood waiting. "Anything but this. Or that," she said, pointing with a big smile to the two drinks she'd tried. "Sorry; I don't know," she added more seriously. She didn't drink that much in high school and certainly not anything as sophisticated as this place.

"Not sweet and not scotch. Any other suggestions?" he asked, raising his eyebrows.

"Surprise me," she said airily, trying to hide her complete lack of knowledge. Will shot her a look she couldn't read and then headed off to the bar. She watched him walk away before Rich caught her attention. "Are you having a good time visiting?" he asked, and she grinned.

"Of course. I feel like such an adult: first the gallery party and now going out here. I thought we were just going to watch movies on the couch."

"Catherine knows how to throw a gallery party. I'm just glad to get to spend time with Will before he leaves for the semester."

"The two of you seem really close," Beth said.

"He's like my brother." Rich turned to look at Will, who was leaning against the bar, patiently waiting his turn. "We practically grew up together, so I know there isn't anybody who's got my back as much as he does." Rich took a sip of his drink. "He's a good guy. I pull those jackass pranks on him all the time to try to rile him up and get him to react to something. He's stuck in his head too much. Plus, he's so good-natured about stuff. He doesn't get pissy when I publicly humiliate him…"

Rich and Beth both laughed, though Beth was distracted by what he'd said. Here again was more praise from someone who knew Will well. He was still waiting at the bar, leaning causally while he waited, all broad shoulders and long legs. She didn't notice that Rich was watching her watch Will until he continued. "I guess from what you said you two didn't start out on the best foot. Maybe that's why he was so quiet last night, but he's a really good guy," Rich said seriously, and Beth couldn't think of a response.

"Must be nice being so close to your family," Carla said, covering for Beth. "Do you have any siblings?"

Rich shook his head. "That's why Anna and Will and I are so close. I'm 5 years older than them, and it's been really fun to watch them grow up and turn into real adults. Especially after the time they had in high school."

Here Beth's interest piqued sharply. Was he referring to Jamie? He had to be. What else could it mean?

"For Anna especially. She was a lot different back then. And Will was just trying to be a good brother, I think." Rich suddenly noticed the interest on Beth's face and pivoted away from the topic. "Well, it was a hard time for everyone. Not a good reflection of who either of them are. But that was a long time ago, and I'm just proud of who he's turned out to be. Such a gentleman!" Rich said loudly as Will returned with several drinks in his hands. Beth had to gulp back on her questions. That had been confirmation of what Jamie had told her, hadn't it? Rich had been very vague, but he'd implied that his cousins were both great people now but not in high school. What else could he be talking about?

"Thank you," she said to Will as he handed her a drink. "What is it?"

"Anything but that," he said, indicating the drink that Carla was alternating sips from. She ventured a sip, and it was refreshing. Tart, but not too sour, with none of the sickly sweetness of her first drink. She thought there might be some cucumber in it, and a spring of thyme served as the garnish.

"It's good," she said and Will nodded his head, looking pleased. Rich was laughing with Carla, though he quieted as Will slid a shot of whiskey in front of him. It was the other drink he'd brought back from the bar.

"For me? Oh, you shouldn't have," Rich said with fake gratitude. "But I'm not taking shots unless you are too."

Will shook his head, a mischievous look on his face. "I only bought that one for you. Unless you want to wait until the waitress comes back, you'll have to take it on your own."

Rich sighed. "It isn't fun to be the only drunk person at the table."

Beth looked at Carla, who was looking back at Rich with mischievous eyes, both drinks in her hand. "Please. You just try to keep up with me."

He arched an eyebrow and then smiled, raising his shot glass to her. "Cheers." He nodded and then downed the drink, shaking his head like a dog afterward. Carla cheered, obviously pleased to have a drinking partner and probably pleased that both of their inhibitions were being lowered.

"I also got darts, in case anyone wanted to play," Will said, pulling them from his back pocket. Carla and Rich were enthusiastic, so they all moved by the dart board. Beth sipped absently on her drink as they decided the order of play and she stood waiting her turn.

Will had just been trying to be a good brother...what on earth could that mean, she wondered. Had he followed Anna's lead and gotten Jamie kicked out? Or had something had happened between Anna and Jamie and Will had been too overprotective? There were a million different scenarios and Beth was more confused now than she had been before. Her eyes kept falling onto Will. He was watching Carla as she prepared to toss a dart, a light smile on his face. In the bar lights, his hair looked black.

"You must have really liked that drink," Rich said, and Beth had to look away as Will's eyes suddenly met hers. She didn't know how long she'd been staring at him, deep in thought.

"Huh?"

Rich laughed and pointed to her drink, which was all gone except for the ice cubes at the bottom. "I said that you must've liked it."

Beth hadn't tasted a single sip; she'd been too busy thinking, but she nodded anyway.

"Good. We ordered you another one," Carla said, smiling brightly and giving Beth a quick kiss on the cheeks. Both Carla and Rich were getting tipsy. Will, as far as she could tell, was still working on his first drink.

She preceded Will in the throwing order for darts, handing them off to him after each turn.

"I was wondering how you got in here," he asked, as she handed him the darts. "Did you have to pay?" He looked genuinely curious as Beth shook her head no, and she rummaged through her purse for the fake ID while he took his turn.

"Wow," was all he said after she handed it to him and he saw the photo. He didn't laugh, although she could see from his expression that he wanted to.

"My spitting image, don't you think?" she asked with an evil smile, holding the ID next to her face.

"I think bouncers are far nicer to pretty women than to men," he replied, raising his eyebrows and then walking away to hand the darts to Rich while Beth digested the fact that he'd called her pretty.

"Did you see Charles again this summer?" she asked him after her next turn, as they stood next to each other in silence. She was curious enough to break the silence, wondering if Will even knew that they had run into Jamie, or if Charles had told him. But he shook his head and she watched him square his shoulders and throw the darts, one, two, three. No bullseyes, but each one worth some points. He'd win soon if he kept that up. He came to stand next to her when his turn was over, leaning his elbows on the hightop behind him so he was closer to her height.

"They're back at school now, right?" he asked, and she nodded. "Still together?"

"Of course. Why did you ask it like that?"

He shrugged lightly, looking over her face. "No reason, really. Jane just always seemed so reserved to me."

Beth couldn't stop her eyebrows from raising in disbelief. "That's a little like the pot calling the kettle black, don't we think?"

Will dipped his head and smiled despite himself. "I meant specifically with Charles. He seemed to be the initiator: touching her or hugging her. I thought Charles liked your sister more than she liked him, that's all. So I wondered if maybe she'd called it off."

Beth gaped at him. "What are you talking about? Jane's crazy about Charles," Beth said, more animated than usual because of the drink she'd had.

Will held up both hands, trying to placate her. "Just an observation. She didn't seem to show her interest, from what I saw. But I believe you if you say she does."

"And what would "showing her interest" look like?" Beth asked, and Will nodded his head in the direction of Rich and Carla. Rich was "teaching" Carla to throw the dart, but it consisted of standing very close behind her with his hand on her waist. She was leaning her head back to whisper something in his ear, both of them seemed to have forgotten about the game.

"They're drunk," Beth said succinctly and with a little disapproval, turning her gaze back to Will. "Plus no one wants to watch that. It would have been unbearable to hang out with them all summer like that." Beth's point was emphasized by a loud giggle from Carla. "Jane is more reserved, but she's very much in love with Charles," Beth added. "You didn't tell him that Jane didn't like him, did you?" she asked, suddenly struck by the idea. But Will shook his head quickly. Beth sighed in relief. The last thing they needed was some stupid comment from Will ruining her sister's relationship.

She watched him throw the darts in another round, racking up more points. "What is the appropriate amount of affection for a relationship?" she quipped. "Since I have the expert here, I need to know."

"Walked in to this one, didn't I?" Will said and Beth nodded, sipping from her drink. "I think it depends on the couple," he said after a moment's thought. "On their dynamic. Whatever's natural."

Beth rolled her eyes. "That was lame for an expert," she said, walking away to take her turn at the dart board.

He was waiting with a reply when she returned to hand him the darts. "What do you think about it? Reserved like Jane?"

The question gave her pause. She'd easily teased Will about it, but she didn't know what she thought. Truth be told, she had been reserved like Jane with her last boyfriend, but that was at least partially because she hadn't been that physically attracted to him. She didn't know what she would be like with someone she really liked.

"No, not like Jane," she finally conceded. "If the spectrum is from them to Jane—". She flicked her eyes toward Carla and Rich. "—then I'm somewhere in the middle. She really does love him though," Beth added again for emphasis.

"I'm glad to hear it," Will said. "I only brought it up because in the past, Charles has been taken advantage of. You know him—he's too nice."

"And men shouldn't be nice to their partners?"

He gave her a look. "It should be mutual niceness. Charles would give and get nothing back and get his heart broken. Not an easy thing to watch as a friend, so believe me when I say that I'm glad your sister is in love with him."

"Has Charles ever watched you get your heart broken?" she asked, emboldened by their conversation. She realized after she'd asked it that it was a deeply personal question. She wondered if Will would answer it and wondered what she would say if he asked her in return.

He looked at her a moment, weighing the response. "He has seen me hurt but not from a romantic relationship," he finally said. Her brow furrowed in puzzlement while he watched her, gauging her reaction. "A story for another time, I think," he said lightly as Carla peeled herself away from Rich and came to stand by Beth.

She gave Beth a suggestive look while pulling her key-ring from her purse. With a quick twist she extracted the apartment key, handing it to Beth. "Hopefully, I won't need this tonight," she said, waggling her eyebrows. "You'll be okay sleeping there alone if things go well?" she asked, and Beth nodded. She knew the apartment number, and she'd be fine taking a cab back later if Carla wasn't there to walk with her. The apartment was only a few blocks away.

"Go get 'em, tiger," she said, and she heard Will laugh and then try to play it off as a cough. Carla either didn't notice or didn't care.

She'd never been very good at darts, and Carla and Rich were too distracted with each other, so Will won with no competition. She'd finished her second drink and Will his first while Carla and Rich were sloppy drunk and all over each other. She excused herself to the restroom, still wondering about what Will had said. She'd pictured him living a charmed life—and she was intrigued about what had hurt him in the past and if it had anything to do with whatever had happened with Jamie in high school.

The bathroom was stylish with an enormous sink and beautiful lighting. She washed her hands and looked at her reflection. Her cheeks were tinged pink from the drinks she'd had, and her eyes looked bright. The night had been...different than she'd expected. In her imagination, the bar was full of handsome men her age, all wanting to talk to her. In reality, Carla and Rich had been so into each other that she'd spent most of the night standing quietly in Will's vicinity. They'd talked, and he had been nice enough to buy her a drink, but it still fell short of her imagination. She realized, belatedly, that he'd probably scared off any potentials from talking to her. Not that she'd seen anyone she really wanted to talk to anyway with all the hipsters in their beanies. So much for her first big night in the city.

She was nonplussed to find Will alone at their table. He was absently playing with the condensation from his drink, and she wondered if he'd been sitting by himself the whole time she was in the bathroom. She frowned as she approached him.

"Where's Rich?"

Will looked up as she slid in across from him. "He said he had to go get some air."

"Where's Carla?" she asked, suddenly worried. Carla hadn't been in the bathroom, Beth knew that already.

"She also wanted to get some air," Will said with the slightest of smirks.

"Ah," Beth said. So they'd left together. Good thing Carla had given her the key. She'd be taking that cab home after all.

"We should find the waitress," Beth said, turning to look for her around the bar.

"I took care of it," Will said casually, and Beth spun around to look at him. He'd paid for everything?! Both her drinks and Carla's as well. She had to protest. But he cut her off before she could say anything. "It's your first time in the city, Rich said. It's my treat. I felt bad that you didn't get something you liked the first time."

Beth was remembering the day before and the size of the diamond in Catherine's necklace. She guessed a night out probably meant nothing to him, whereas for her it would've been a full day of work at the bookstore. "Thank you," she said grudgingly. She hadn't wanted him to do that and it made her feel strange to see the kind of wealth that he had, but there didn't seem to be anything she could do about it. She wondered if he hadn't gotten a second drink so she wouldn't try to pay for it and felt all sorts of contrary emotions about it.

In the meantime, there was silence between the two of them at the table. She looked down at her fingernails; she moved her glass around on the table distractedly; she watched the people at the bar and the waitresses hurrying around the floor, all the while wishing that she could come up with anything to say. It was like all the other times with him. When would she learn? Finally, the silence between them became insufferable. "Do you mind if we leave?" she asked.

"Sure," Will replied calmly, and they walked outside to the humid night air. "I'll walk you there," he said firmly as soon as they stepped outside. "You shouldn't walk at night by yourself."

Facing the possibility of an uncomfortable walk home with Will, she let out a quiet sigh but thanked him again. It was out of his way, after all. And it was nice of him to do it. He could have easily just left her. But as they walked quietly along the sidewalk, she couldn't help feeling more and more annoyed. Will had no trouble talking to her when they were with other people, but whenever they were alone it was back to these stupid, unending silences with him!

"It's humid," Beth finally said, forcing herself to break the silence. Will nodded emphatically, but then it was silent again except for the breeze and the passing cars on the street. Beth was screaming internally.

"It's your turn to talk, Will," she said desperately, emboldened by the drink she'd had. "Anything will do." He turned to glance at her and she raised her eyebrows expectantly. "I've heard you talk before. I know you can do it. Sometimes you're even quite fluent."

Will turned his whole body and walked sideways to get a good look at her. "Do you really want me to say something just to fill the silence?"

"Yes," Beth said with emphasis.

"I guess I just enjoy the quiet. Listening to other people. It's easier to notice things when you're not the one talking."

"Notice what—all the stupid things people say and do?"

"Sometimes. Or facial reactions. You talk a lot with your face, for example."

Beth's eyebrows furrowed before she could stop herself, and Will pointed at her with a knowing smile. She rubbed her fingers lightly over her forehead, covering her expression.

"I'm still having fun, even if I'm not saying anything," he said, catching her eye, and she made an exasperated expression.

"Rich was right, you know. You are lazy—putting all the conversation work on the other person," she replied, pointing her finger at him in return.

"What should I do instead? To show that I'm engaged and having fun and not lazy," he asked her curiously. His eyes were questioning, but his mouth showed amusement.

"I don't know—start a conversation when there's a lull," she said, picturing all their silent, awkward moments. "Don't just sit there, silently. You have thoughts, don't you? Feelings?"

"Yes. Lots of them."

Beth had to look away from his eyes. During the walk, he'd been looking amused at her bristling and her sarcasm. There was something else in his expression now. She didn't know what it meant, but she was glad that they had arrived at the apartment building. He'd stopped belatedly after her, realizing they had arrived. Then they stood facing each other on the sidewalk, and this silence was somehow different than the others had been. For once, Beth didn't want him to say anything. There was something building in the air between them ever since they'd stopped walking.

A young woman who was walking her dog came from behind Will, and he stepped to the side and closer to Beth to move out of their way on the sidewalk. As he did, the back of her hand brushed the back of his, and the slight touch made the hair stand up on her arms. She didn't know what was happening between the two of them. She could only guess it was because they had never been so thoroughly alone together as in the last fifteen minutes. Even during their late night conversation, Jane had been there. Asleep on the couch, but still there.

"This is me," she said quietly, pointing up the steps to Carla's apartment building. He gestured her up the stairs and she realized that he was going to walk her all the way to the front door. She took a shallow breath and walked up the steps, conscious of Will following behind. At the top she turned while he stood one step down so that they were at eye level with each other.

God, it was like a date, she thought frantically. Like they were on a date and this was the end of the night...but he wasn't going to kiss her, there was no way.

"Listen, I—" He paused. His voice was low, just enough to cover the short distance between them. He'd somehow put his hands on the back of her elbows. Beth looked at him, her eyes enormous. He tried to say something else but didn't get any farther than before, and then he sighed, his eyes running over her face. Beth thought it was truly stupid that his light, clinical grip on her arms was having any sort of effect on her, but it was. She was much closer to him than she'd ever been before, close enough to see that he had freckles on one of his cheekbones, just below his eye. Their proximity was doing strange things to her. This would be the moment to turn away, but she wasn't doing it. Instead, she found herself wondering what it really would be like to kiss him.

Her heart was pounding so hard now she could feel it in her throat. She noticed his mouth, the sensuous turn of it, how he wasn't smiling any more. She'd never seen that kind of look on his face before, and her breath caught in her throat. He was still holding onto the back of her elbows, and the really stupid thing was that she was still letting him. The attraction between them was acting like a physical pull. They were so close, his mouth just an inch or two from hers. They were the right height for each other with him one step below. Their eyes at the same level, their mouths at the same level...

She didn't know who moved first. Maybe both of them. But then his mouth was so warm on hers, and the touch of his hand was light on her jaw, her cheek, the back of her neck.

She'd never experienced a kiss like it, but all she could do was feel all the places they touched and his mouth on hers, and then he was kissing her and kissing her and she responded eagerly. It didn't seem possible that anyone could be so good at it, but he was. The chemistry between them was undeniable, with their bodies responding to each other without thought. She'd kissed her high school boyfriend 100 times, and not once had it ever felt like this. Intense, all consuming, addicting. Will wound one arm around her waist, pulling them closer together, chest to chest, and the more they touched, the more intense it felt. Beth ran her hands through the soft hairs at the nape of his neck.

The doors to the building suddenly opened behind them, and Will lifted his head. They both looked to the doors in shock, but the person walked by quickly without a word or backward glance.

"Oh," Beth managed to say, inarticulately. She was gripping his shirt with her hands, and he still had his arm around her lower back.

"Umm," Will murmured, his eyes moving away from hers down to her mouth again.

"Inside, probably," was all Beth managed to say and she found herself whispering without knowing why. She loosened her grip on his shirt, feeling completely out of control. She fumbled putting the key in the lock, her fingers not seeming to work.

"Hmm," she said, looking at Will as they stood in the dimly lit hallway by the mailboxes. He gave her a shy, lopsided smile and she couldn't help smiling back. When he moved closer to her, it was just the same as it'd been outside: attraction so strong it was like a physical draw. And then he kissed her again, softly at first and then with more intensity. This time she had to stand up on her toes. His hand was holding the back of her head, tangled in her hair. Beth couldn't believe something so simple could feel so good. They stumbled backwards and Will hissed in pain against her mouth as Beth's weight rammed his lower back into the doorknob of the office door behind them.

"Ow," he said, but he was laughing against her mouth, and they didn't stop kissing.

It wasn't until another tenet entered the hallway from outside, this one stopping to gawk and give a disapproving look, that they managed to disentangle themselves.

Beth ran a hand through her hair. This was completely insane. There wasn't much airflow in the hallway and she found herself suddenly feeling overheated and lightheaded. Too much kissing, not enough breathing. And with Will. What was she doing? A sudden panic seemed to take hold of her. She found she couldn't look at Will. Will noticed her change in mood immediately. "Are you okay?"

She shook her head and slid past him without touching to get to the front door.

"Wait a minute," Will said, half-panicked.

But Beth only shook her head, pushing the door open further. She walked outside and kept on going, down the steps to the sidewalk. He had to grab her arm to keep her from walking off. He turned her around to face him.

"Wait..." He struggled to find his words. Beth didn't want to look at him, but she couldn't seem to look away either. He looked down at his feet, taking a nervous breath before finally meeting her gaze. He looked extremely mussed, his hair going in all different directions in the back where she had run her hands through it. His shirt was crumpled where her hands had been.

"I like you, Beth. I've liked you since we first met. I didn't think I would see you again. And I've been trying to not like you, actually. But you're here...and as soon as I saw you again it was the same." He was rushing through the words now. "We're so different, our backgrounds, I mean. I just didn't think it would work. And you're not like anyone I've been with before. I've tried to stop, but every time I talk to you again, it's there. I don't know. I didn't think this would happen," he said.

"You—? But—" she couldn't seem to get anything articulated. Will couldn't like her. She thought of all their silences together. But of course, there were all the conversations they'd had as well. She took a shaky breath. Part of her was flattered, but the meaning of the words was sinking in. Clearly, he hadn't thought she was good enough to date or he wouldn't have tried to stop; it was a strange echo of the first thing she had ever heard him say about her.

"But I—you're so…" Beth ran a hand over her forehead, feeling hot and overwhelmed. "You are so frustrating! I know that you have everything—this perfect, fabulous, totally charmed life, but every time I see you, it's like you're insulting me or implying that I'm not good enough. Even now, after…" she couldn't bring herself to say what they had been doing. "I changed my mind: Rich was wrong; you're not just lazy with conversation: you are an asshole."

His eyes were flashing at that, and he responded quickly. "You think you know everything about everybody. Like you're some amazing judge of people. Judging the "stupid" hipsters in the bar, all the stupid people you went to high school with, and me and my life, apparently. Like you're the authority on what people should think and how they should behave. Even Carla and Rich tonight."

Beth was taken aback by this. Sure, she'd made fun of the people in the bar tonight, and been disapproving of Carla's PDA, he was right.

"Have you ever stopped to think that maybe you don't know everything?" Will continued.

What he was saying hurt her feelings, and she lashed out. "I'm the authority on everything? You're one to talk. You're the one who told me I wasn't worth talking to, that getting into Pemberley was a joke. That you liked me but wished you didn't! And you're the one who got someone expelled from your high school just because you had some stupid disagreement on the lacrosse field. Jamie told me what you did to him."

Beth didn't know why she was bringing Jamie up except that she knew it must be a soft spot with Will and she wanted to goad him into reacting. They were far from a rational discussion. It worked. He looked completely shocked for a moment and then overwhelmed with some strong emotion. Will's voice rose to match hers "You have no idea what you're talking about. As usual."

She narrowed her eyes.

"You treat people like shit just because they don't have as much money as you. You did it to Jamie, and now me. I'm "so different" from everyone you've dated before because I'm not rich, or stuck-up, or an asshole." She was breathing like she'd just run a race. "But you are."

Will looked at her for a moment before speaking, and when he did it was carefully quiet again. "You're just mad that I was honest. If I'd flattered you, you would have eaten it up. That's what Jamie does, anyway. And it seems like he's your new best friend." He turned on his heels and walked away down the sidewalk. "Have fun with that, Beth." She saw him angrily shaking his head as he walked.

Beth stood on the sidewalk, breathing heavily, watching Will get smaller and smaller in the distance. From the kiss, to his confession, to their ensuing fight, it had been the most intense encounter of her life.