A/N: I was inspired to write this while driving down the road today. It is my first Ron/Luna fic, so please be nice. I hope you enjoy it.
The Grande Illusion
Welcome to the grand illusion
Come on in and see what's happenin'
Pay the price, get your tickets for the show!
Ron sometimes hated the fact that his best friend was such a celebrity. Oh, he knew that Harry couldn't help it--after all, it wasn't Harry's fault that he managed to strip the world's most evil wizard of his power at the age of one year old--but still...sometimes it was rather trying to put up with. How was he supposed to have a private conversation with his friend if no one would give them one moment's peace? Now that everyone believed Harry's story, they all wanted to interview him. After all, he was the one who could save them all again, wasn't he?
Ron knew that all the publicity annoyed Harry to no end. He was always complaining about it, and telling Ron how lucky he was that he didn't have a scar marring his forehead. Harry once said, in a moment of absolute insanity, that if one more person interviewed him on the ministry attack of the year before, that he would expect a million-pound salary for being their celebrity meat. After all, that's what he felt like most of the time--a piece of cutlery on display in a butcher's shop, waiting to be sold to the highest bidder.
Ron had just laughed, and asked why Harry didn't do just that. He could start charging a fee for his interviews, and hold press conferences, like a Member of Parliament. Then, at least, he would get something out it. Harry had just laughed and shook his head. He replied, "I already feel like a circus freak; no reason to make it official." The issue had then been dropped.
The stage is set The band starts playing
Suddenly your heart is pounding;
Wishing secretly you were a star.
Even though Ron knew that Harry hated it, Ron couldn't help but want a taste of what Harry got every day. Ron knew that Harry thoughtthat he--Ron--was the lucky one, but Ron didn't think so. Oh, he felt blessed to have his family and all, but he wanted something more. He wanted to be known for something else other than being a Weasley.
While Harry was popular for survival of Avada Kedavra at the age of one, Ron was famous for lesser things. He was famous simply because he was a Weasley. Now, certain members of wizarding society might think of them as more infamous than famous--like the Malfoys for example--but, most people liked the Weasleys quite a bit. If you didn't know a Weasley by name, you at least knew them by looks. The Weasleys were famous for red hair, lots of children, and for looking...well, poor. That's not what Ron wanted to be famous for.
He wanted to be able to do something that his brothers couldn't. Sure, he had gotten prefect, but Bill and Percy had done that already. Big whoop. He wasn't a great prankster like Fred and George, and he definitely wasn't a little girl like Ginny (thank God), and if he would admit it to himself, he didn't feel like he was that good at Quidditch either. That had been Charlie's forte. Ron never felt like he had ever been that great at anything.
He wished that for just one day people would look at him the way they looked at Harry. He wanted to be looked at with respect, admiration, and...fear. He didn't want people to fear him the way they feared Voldemort, but the way they feared Harry and Dumbledore. Both Harry and Dumbledore seemed to radiate with this power that you were afraid would go off and set off a nuclear explosion if you but handle it the wrong way. They were powerful wizards; wizards who would make a difference. That's what Ron wanted to do. That was also probably the one thing he would never have a chance to do.
But don't be fooled by the radio The TV or the magazine
They show you photographs of how your life should be
But they're someone else's fantasies
Ron was currently sitting by the lake, watching the Giant Squid slap its tentacles against the water, making small waves across the lake which would crash against the shore with tiny lapping sounds that could lull you to sleep if you weren't careful. He had a paper in his hand, a regular daily issue of the Daily Prophet, which headlined "Harry Potter Sees Happiest Year Yet at Hogwarts."
Ron crumbled the paper into his hand. He knew that headline was a lie, possibly the biggest lie he had read in a long time. Harry was anything but happy. Harry was miserable, and had been since that night at the Department of Mysteries. He had been quiet and pensive ever since that conversation he had had with Dumbledore that night, and it was only two days before thatRon had discovered what was said. At first, Ron had been angry, infuriated even. How could Harry have kept something like that from him! Then he had come to his senses. Harry didn't need to deal with his anger; Harry needed his best friend, and that was what Ron had given him. But then he'd gotten a bigger blow...
Flashback
"Ron, could I talk to you about something?" asked Harry in a quiet, almost anxious and shy voice.
"Of course, Harry. What's the bee in your bonnet?"
"Could we sit down?" Harry asked, gesturing quickly to the couch in front of the warm fire, and wringing his hands nervously. Ron nodded and complied to Harry's request.
Harry's eyes were anxiously scanning the room, as though terrified that someone might hear what was said. He was making Ron very nervous indeed. Obviously whatever Harry had to say was not of a good variety.
"Harry, you're making me nervous. What's wrong, mate?"
"Ron, do you remember--do you remember that night when we went to rescue Sirius from the Department of Mysteries?"
"How could I forget? Those blasted brain thingies almost strangled me death." Ron shuddered at the memory. He still had nightmares of those things. In his dreams, they always continued to wrap around him, strangling the life from him. But, they didn't just stop with him. They would then strangle Harry, Hermione, Ginny, Neville, and Luna too. That was the worst part. He could deal with his own death, but he didn't want to have to see the deaths of his friends and his sister...and Luna...but he wasn't supposed to be thinking of her right now.
"Well, afterwards I went to Dumbledore's office, after Sirius...after everything that happened. That's when he told me..." Harry broke off, staring distractedly into the fire.
"When he told you what, Harry?" From the look on Harry face, Ron could tell that he wasn't going to like what he was about to hear.
"The Prophecy."
"The Prophecy? Gee, could you vague that up for me?" Ron added sarcastically.
"The Prophecy was predicted by Professor Trelawney just after I was born. That's why everything happened. That's why Voldemort was after my parents; why he's after me."
"Okay, Harry, enough with the crypticness. Just spit it out. Why is after you?"
"The one with the power to vanquish the Dark Lord approaches...born to those who have thrice defied him, born as the seventh month dies...and the Dark Lord will mark him as his equal, but he will have a power the Dark Lord knows not...and either must die at the hands of the other, for neither can live while the other survives...the one with the power to vanquish the Dark Lord will be born as the seventh month dies..."
"So, the only reason he's after you is because you're the only one who can destroy him? Unless he destroys you first?"
"Yes, and yes."
"That's pretty heavy."
Harry nodded, and Ron closed his eyes, composing his anger. Harry didn't need him going off on him right now.
"When are you going to tell Hermione?"
It seemed like a perfectly safe question to ask. Harry blushed and looked down at his feet.
"Well, I kind of already did..."
"You told her first! Harry, we're best mates! The oldest friends! And you tell me last?"
"I didn't want to burden you with this, Ron! You've been busy with Quidditch and prefect duties, and I didn't want to add another worry to your list."
"Sure, thinking about me, were you? Come on, Harry, I know you better than this. You didn't tell me because you didn't want to, and you told Hermione first because you've been dating her in secret since the beginning of this year."
"How did you know that?"
"I'm not blind, okay? I've caught you holding hands and sneaking off. You think I can't notice when I'm by myself all the time?" Ron hadn't meant to mention that last part--the part about being by himself all the time--but it had kind of slipped out. Ron had stood in shocked silence for the briefest of seconds, and then bolted out the portrait hole. He didn't want to see Harry's guilty expression. That had not been his intent.
So if you think your life is complete confusion Cause you never win the game
Just remember that it's a Grand Illusion Deep inside we're all the same
So if you think your life is complete confusion Cause your neighbors got it made
Just remember that it's a Grand Illusion And deep inside we're all the same
It was Harry and Hermione's being together that truly made him envious of Harry, if he wanted to be honest with himself. It wasn't that Harry had Hermione, it was that he had someone.
He had that special someone who made everything seem worth it. Ron had no such thing. All he had was Pigwidgeon--his owl--and half the time, he would be more than willing to give that up. That hyperactive owl was always getting on his nerves, hooting and screeching at all hours of the day and night, never giving him a moment's peace. He sometimes wished he could glue that owl's beak together with crazy glue so it could never open its beak again. Then there could be some silence in his home...well, maybe not silence, but a bit more quiet anyway. That would at least be something.
Ron chucked the Daily Prophet into the water and watched it turn soggy before starting to sink beneath the surface. He didn't really want to head back inside the castle yet, but he couldn't really think of anything else to do...maybe he would just stare at the stars for a while. He liked the stars...they made him feel less lonely.
"Hey, Ronald. Would you like some company?" came a familiar voice from behind him.
"Sure, pull up some grass, Luna."
"What are you doing out here still? You've been sitting here for three hours."
"Just thinking about some things."
"Envying Harry again, eh?"
"How did you know?"
"It's pretty easy to tell when you're always staring at him, almost as though you're imagining what it would be like to be standing where he is standing. I can't say I blame you though. I stand and imagine myself in Hermione's shoes all the time."
"So, you like Harry too, do you?" Ron asked hesitantly. He wasn't sure he wanted to know the answer to that question. You see, his feelings for Luna were rather complicated. He wasn't in love with her exactly, since he didn't know her that well, but...he definitely felt something for her. It definitely wasn't platonic either. His thoughts about Luna were a little more interesting than that.
"No, I just wonder what it would be like to stand near you without you looking at me weirdly."
Ron cringed inwardly. He had thought Luna was slightly more than eccentric when he first met her, and couldn't even bring himself to give her the time of day, but after their adventure in the Department of Mysteries, he liked her quite a bit more, and what once seemed weird, now seemed adorable. It was part of what made Luna herself, and he wouldn't want to change anything about her.
"Don't worry, it's not just you that I look at that way. That's just my face," he joked, and they both laughed.
"Really though, Ron...why do you envy Harry so much?"
America spells competition Join us in our blind ambition
Get yourself a brand new
Someday soon, we'll start to ponder What on earth's this spell we're under
We made the grade and still we wonder Who the hell we are
"I guess...I envy his potential. I mean, he has this great power--like Dumbledore--you're afraid of it, in a good way. You don't want to be on the opposite side of that power, but you definitely don't mind fighting with him. I envy his relationship with Hermione. Well, not his relationship with Hermione specifically, but just because he has someone like that--smart, and lovely, and...do you get what I'm saying at all?"
"Of course I do, Ronald. You're a competitive person, so naturally you envy his power. You want to prove yourself as special. You envy having someone love you that strongly, like Hermione loves Harry. You envy Hermione's smartness; her ability to think under pressure, and pick things up so easily. You feel that makes her more useful than you.
"You know their characteristics very well, Ronald. But, maybe...maybe you just don't know yourself."
"What do you mean?" asked Ron, impressed at Luna's intuitiveness, and confused at her point.
"It's all an illusion, Ronald. It's a Grand Illusion; a spell on your mind. It's a spell you've cast on yourself. You have this grand illusion that you'll never amount to anything, and that you're expendable in some way. That's not true. That's not true at all."
"How can that not be true? I mean, Harry's got the power, Hermione's got the brains. What do I have?"
"You're right. Harry has a great power, and it will save us all one day. Hermione has the brains to get everyone out of a tough situation, and to help you pass school. But there is one thing you add to the group that is crucial; something they wouldn't have if they didn't have you."
"Yeah? And what's that?" asked Ron, slightly disbelieving.
"Your heart. I know it sounds cliche and boring, but...that's your gift. Your heart. You were the first person Harry's age to show him kindness--not Hermione, you. You were the thing in the second task that was determined to be the thing that Harry would miss the most. You were his heart, and the heart is the biggest part of someone."
She placed her right hand on his chest, directly over his heart to emphasize her point. "Your heart beats with loyalty and love. It beats with what makes Harry who he is. With a heart like yours, you could be everything you could ever want to be and more, because you have the heart of a hero. You're my hero."
She looked up into his eyes, as though searching for something. As he stared back into hers, he felt the illusion start to shatter. All the doubts and insecurities he had about himself started to fade as he saw the respect and admiration and trust in her eyes that he had always longed to see from someone. She loved him the way Hermione loved Harry. He didn't think he would ever know why she did, or what he did to deserve her, but at that moment, he knew that he wanted to find out if he truly did deserve her.
"Luna, can I ask you something?" he asked, still not breaking eye contact with her.
"Anything, Ronald."
"Could I kiss you?"
Luna smiled. "I thought you'd never ask me."
He tilted his head down to meet hers. Their lips met, awkwardly at first, but then they started to move together. His tongue probed her lips and tasted her mouth. She tasted good, like sugar quills and chocolate frogs from Honeydukes.
He pulled back for a second and smiled. Luna's eyes were still closed and her mouth was spread into a blissful smile. He leaned back down and started kissing her again. With each caress of the lips, the illusion faded more and more, and reality set into its place.
Maybe Ron would never be as powerful as Harry, or as smart as Hermione. But maybe that's not what mattered. What truly mattered was this, what he was doing in the here and now. He was trusting his heart to do its job. He was allowing himself to feel; he was allowing himself to love. He may not have had strength or brains, but he had his heart. She was standing before him, kissing him, and holding him close. And his heart was all he needed.
Well, that's my first attempt at a Luna/Ron fic, and I hope it was okay. I had some angst in there as well.
This fic was inspired by "The Grande Illusion" by the classic rock group, Styx. It is from the album of the same title.
Please review, good or bad, I'll appreciate it.
Lots of love,
jandl