Chapter Sixteen: And Now You're Gone
Only Shion and I took the shuttle back to the Foundation to retrieve MOMO, seeing as Jr. and the others had to control all of the aspects of retaliation from the Durandal's bridge. There were no others in the shuttle returning, only the two of us. Shion was seated, but I found myself involuntarily pacing the length of the door. I was sure that she was fine, but at the same time, I couldn't help but feel a certain dread pulling on my heartstrings. After what had seemed like hours, the shuttle slowed to a stop and the door wound downward. I stepped out and instantly my scanners began searching for her.
My heart stopped dead in my chest. Fear gripped my insides in its iron clutch. Frantically, my eyes swept over the shuttle port again and again. And every time I looked, she was still gone. Shion stepped out next to me, her head swiveling back and forth, obviously in search as well. I was suddenly overcome, and I moved from my spot to where some of the injured still lay.
"MOMO!" I called into the crowd, wishing, hoping that she was just hidden from view. I looked down at a man that sat nursing an injured femur. "Have you seen a 100-series Realian come this way?" I asked intensely. The man shook his head, obviously in great amounts of pain. Frustrated, I left his side and would have gone dashing off into the city if Shion's calm hand had not latched itself onto my shoulder. I stared back at her, at first amazed that she would try to stop me. Then I saw the same look in her own eyes. My tense form relaxed.
In my concern for MOMO, I had failed to notice the feelings of those around me, their feelings for MOMO. Now that my mind was finally flung wide open, I could see the concern in Shion's green eyes, see her maternal instincts evincing themselves at the thought of MOMO gone missing. And all this time, I had not only failed to see the feelings between Shion and MOMO, but also the friendship between Shion and myself. She must have noticed my gaze, for she looked past me and into the crowd.
"Do... Do you think," Shion started, "that she might have gone back on a different shuttle?" I stared out at the crowd once again, and I decided that must have been what happened. MOMO rode back on another shuttle and was probably waiting for us on the Durandal. I took her hand from my shoulder and nodded to her.
"Yes, she probably decided to return on her own instead of waiting for us." I knelt down next to the injured man I had shouted at, quickly apologized and asked if he needed assistance to reach the shuttle. As soon as I was standing again, the man perched precariously in my arms, I looked again to Shion. "We should head back to the Durandal as soon as possible." A smile spread itself over Shion's face, and she nodded as well.
"Yes, let's." We made our way back to the shuttle, and as the shuttle's door closed, I could hear Shion laughing quietly to herself.
"What's so funny?" I asked, sitting the injured man on one of the benches on the perimeter of the shuttle. Shion shook her head while her soft laugh filled the shuttle.
"I let my feelings for MOMO take away my reason. Of course she came back on a different shuttle. I was just so worried about her..."
"I understand, Shion." I told her as the shuttle began to slow upon approaching the Durandal. "I've seen cases where a man's emotion became so strong, his feelings for the person so potent, that he lost all sense of rationality and ruined not only the mission, but also the chance for that other person to live." My companion's hand covered her lips in surprise.
"Who... Would I know who it was?" she asked quietly. I pressed my lips into a thin line, realizing that I had been talking about myself. I had been talking about my own experiences from 100 years ago. Slowly, I looked down to Shion's eyes, and I shook my head.
"No. No, you wouldn't know him," I said a stoic voice. It was at that moment, realizing my mistakes from my past, that I decided that I could no longer throw my emotions into my mission with MOMO. I could no longer allow myself to think of her the way that I had been. I had been so worried about her only a few moments ago, but I realized that I couldn't risk it. I couldn't risk losing her to my emotions too. I had already lost so many because of my damned emotions. It was because I cared about MOMO that I couldn't care about her. I closed my eyes fast and delved deep into my mind, trying to forget any emotions I had attached to the little Realian. It was hard. But in order to protect her, I had to forget how much I cared about her.
The shuttle's door slid open with a hiss and I walked down the stairs, followed by a now silent Shion. As soon as I was off the landing pad, I scanned the dock for any sign of MOMO. A few other 100-series Realians were milling about, but none with the same vibrant pink hair as my charge. I frowned, my eyebrows furrowing in anxiety. Shion appeared by my side.
"Do you see her?" she asked in a quiet tone. I shook my head.
"She's not on the dock," I answered. "I don't even detect a trace of her." I shut my eyes again, trying not to think about any precarious positions she could be facing. I tried my hardest not to grit my teeth in anger at anyone who may harm her.
"Ziggy?" I heard Shion's worried voice at my side, and I opened my eyes again, devoid of emotion.
"We should check the Residential Area. She may have gone there looking for one of us." I set off for the train immediately, followed by a slower and more apprehensive Shion. I stated that our destination was for the Residential Area and sat on one of the padded seats. The doors closed just as Shion stepped into the train, and it took off at a great speed. She had her arms folded before her, clenching and unclenching her fists in anxiety, her eyes at her feet. Finally, she looked to me.
"Ziggy, I shouldn't have pried, back on the shuttle. It's your own business, not mine."
"It's all right," I assured her. "If it had been you telling the story, I would have asked the same question." Truth be told, I wouldn't have asked, but I didn't want any more worries on Shion's shoulders. There was enough weighing all of us down after so much had happened. The cold, set unease on her face lifted slightly with a sad smile, but as the train slowed, her face was a slight gray color. Our transport stopped altogether, and the two of us, along with a few others, piled out of the train and headed into the Residential Area. The first thing we were greeted with was Jr.'s red face as he dashed up to us.
"Where's MOMO?!" he asked in a loud, obtrusive voice.
"We think that she may have come back here, looking for one of us," I answered in a cold voice. Jr. stared at me, a look of disbelief on his face. Then his face contorted in anger, and his fist clenched like he wanted to punch me.
"You lost her?!" His words stung, a deep spike driven through my chest. "You stupid cyborg, I'll-"
"Jr.!" Shion started, her own face flushed. "You know as well as I do that MOMO stayed behind of her own accord. It's no one's fault that we can't find her." She breathed a long sigh and pushed her glasses up the bridge of her nose. "She's probably just waiting in her room."
"Like hell," Jr. murmured, his strangely blue eyes glaring up at me. I grimaced as I mentally pulled the great imaginary spike from my body and gathered myself together. I walked past Jr. without another word, although I could still here the curses he was muttering under his breath. Unfazed, we entered the Residential Area, where the moans and cries of the injured civilians filled my ears. My first stop was MOMO's room. On my way there, I couldn't help to remember the promise I had made to her while she slept in that room. I remembered the fear in my heart when the Federation ships attacked, and I forced my way into MOMO's room. I closed my eyes in attempts to wipe away the feelings as I reached her door.
First, I raised my hand to knock on the door, but instead, I tuned my scanners to searching her room from where I stood. There were no signs of life, let alone the one little Realian I was searching for. Defeated, I returned to the main hallway to join Shion and Jr. They both held expectant looks on their faces, but I shook my head in response. Jr. growled, and, without warning, screamed at the top of his lungs, venting his frustration. I couldn't help to stop and think that Jr. was acting exactly the way I felt inside. Stubbornly, I shoved aside my emotions and continued walking down the hall.
"Allen!" Shion called from beside me. I looked up, having totally missed seeing her co-worker carrying a large first-aid box down the hallway. He turned with a smile and walked quickly toward us. Just as he stopped, my emotions broke free of the hold I was keeping them under.
"Have you seen MOMO?!" I asked quickly. Shion glanced up at me quickly, then back to her red-headed friend. Allen's face screwed up in confusion, possibly at my sudden outburst, or maybe at the fact that I had no idea where MOMO was.
"No," he started, looking from me to the red-faced Jr and back, "she's not back yet? I thought she was with you." Quickly, I shoved my feelings back into the darkness of my mind and continued in a calmer voice.
"She stayed behind to treat the injured, but she wasn't there when we returned. We thought she might have come back on her own..." I looked down at Jr., and it seemed as if he had calmed down slightly, although there was a pinched annoyance on his face.
"Damn, where the hell is she?" He paused to run a hand over his face slowly, then looked up at me with a different expression altogether. He actually looked ... normal. "All right, I'll get our 100-Series to start searching. They shouldn't have any trouble, being the same model and all." Surprised at his sudden change, I nodded and thanked him.
"Thanks. We've eliminated the Gnosis within the Colony, but there isn't any guarantee they won't be back." There was a silence, then Jr. turned to leave, most likely headed to the bridge. There was also a silence between Shion and Allen. The latter's face had turned redder than his hair, and he started to inch backwards.
"Well, uh... I've got to take care of these wounded people, but... I'll see you later, Chief... I hope you find MOMO soon..." He backed away, but as he did, I could see a faint smile hovering on Shion's face. She then turned to me.
"We should follow Jr., so we know where to go when they find MOMO."
"Yeah," I said quietly, "when they find her." She placed a comforting hand on my arm and smiled encouragingly.
"Don't worry. They'll find MOMO. We probably just missed her somewhere, that's all." Her hand gently pushed me forward, and we began walking after Jr. After walking in silence for a few moments, I turned my eyes to my friend.
"Shion," I caught her attention as she turned to look at me, "do you really think that MOMO, as smart as she is, left the Foundation without waiting for us to return?" She was silent. I was about to prompt her into speaking when she shrugged.
"I don't know." Her eyes went to the floor. "I really don't know what to think. I don't want to think of the worst that could happen, because then I'll worry too much. I don't want to think that she's waiting on the bridge for us, either. In the little time I've known the two of you, I've come to think of you as good friends, and MOMO feels more like a daughter than a stranger. I worry about her, and I'm so scared that something bad may have happened to her." She looked up again, and I was startled to see her eyes covered with misty tears. "Do... Do you understand?" I wanted to tell her that I understood, that I thought of MOMO like a daughter. But I had locked my emotions far back in my mind.
I looked away from her wet eyes and to the ground, where my feet were methodically plodding toward the train. I didn't have any answers.
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AN: So so sorry for the lack of updates, everyone, but I think I'm finally back on track with this story. Thanks for the support and you'll probably see another chapter soon!
Only Shion and I took the shuttle back to the Foundation to retrieve MOMO, seeing as Jr. and the others had to control all of the aspects of retaliation from the Durandal's bridge. There were no others in the shuttle returning, only the two of us. Shion was seated, but I found myself involuntarily pacing the length of the door. I was sure that she was fine, but at the same time, I couldn't help but feel a certain dread pulling on my heartstrings. After what had seemed like hours, the shuttle slowed to a stop and the door wound downward. I stepped out and instantly my scanners began searching for her.
My heart stopped dead in my chest. Fear gripped my insides in its iron clutch. Frantically, my eyes swept over the shuttle port again and again. And every time I looked, she was still gone. Shion stepped out next to me, her head swiveling back and forth, obviously in search as well. I was suddenly overcome, and I moved from my spot to where some of the injured still lay.
"MOMO!" I called into the crowd, wishing, hoping that she was just hidden from view. I looked down at a man that sat nursing an injured femur. "Have you seen a 100-series Realian come this way?" I asked intensely. The man shook his head, obviously in great amounts of pain. Frustrated, I left his side and would have gone dashing off into the city if Shion's calm hand had not latched itself onto my shoulder. I stared back at her, at first amazed that she would try to stop me. Then I saw the same look in her own eyes. My tense form relaxed.
In my concern for MOMO, I had failed to notice the feelings of those around me, their feelings for MOMO. Now that my mind was finally flung wide open, I could see the concern in Shion's green eyes, see her maternal instincts evincing themselves at the thought of MOMO gone missing. And all this time, I had not only failed to see the feelings between Shion and MOMO, but also the friendship between Shion and myself. She must have noticed my gaze, for she looked past me and into the crowd.
"Do... Do you think," Shion started, "that she might have gone back on a different shuttle?" I stared out at the crowd once again, and I decided that must have been what happened. MOMO rode back on another shuttle and was probably waiting for us on the Durandal. I took her hand from my shoulder and nodded to her.
"Yes, she probably decided to return on her own instead of waiting for us." I knelt down next to the injured man I had shouted at, quickly apologized and asked if he needed assistance to reach the shuttle. As soon as I was standing again, the man perched precariously in my arms, I looked again to Shion. "We should head back to the Durandal as soon as possible." A smile spread itself over Shion's face, and she nodded as well.
"Yes, let's." We made our way back to the shuttle, and as the shuttle's door closed, I could hear Shion laughing quietly to herself.
"What's so funny?" I asked, sitting the injured man on one of the benches on the perimeter of the shuttle. Shion shook her head while her soft laugh filled the shuttle.
"I let my feelings for MOMO take away my reason. Of course she came back on a different shuttle. I was just so worried about her..."
"I understand, Shion." I told her as the shuttle began to slow upon approaching the Durandal. "I've seen cases where a man's emotion became so strong, his feelings for the person so potent, that he lost all sense of rationality and ruined not only the mission, but also the chance for that other person to live." My companion's hand covered her lips in surprise.
"Who... Would I know who it was?" she asked quietly. I pressed my lips into a thin line, realizing that I had been talking about myself. I had been talking about my own experiences from 100 years ago. Slowly, I looked down to Shion's eyes, and I shook my head.
"No. No, you wouldn't know him," I said a stoic voice. It was at that moment, realizing my mistakes from my past, that I decided that I could no longer throw my emotions into my mission with MOMO. I could no longer allow myself to think of her the way that I had been. I had been so worried about her only a few moments ago, but I realized that I couldn't risk it. I couldn't risk losing her to my emotions too. I had already lost so many because of my damned emotions. It was because I cared about MOMO that I couldn't care about her. I closed my eyes fast and delved deep into my mind, trying to forget any emotions I had attached to the little Realian. It was hard. But in order to protect her, I had to forget how much I cared about her.
The shuttle's door slid open with a hiss and I walked down the stairs, followed by a now silent Shion. As soon as I was off the landing pad, I scanned the dock for any sign of MOMO. A few other 100-series Realians were milling about, but none with the same vibrant pink hair as my charge. I frowned, my eyebrows furrowing in anxiety. Shion appeared by my side.
"Do you see her?" she asked in a quiet tone. I shook my head.
"She's not on the dock," I answered. "I don't even detect a trace of her." I shut my eyes again, trying not to think about any precarious positions she could be facing. I tried my hardest not to grit my teeth in anger at anyone who may harm her.
"Ziggy?" I heard Shion's worried voice at my side, and I opened my eyes again, devoid of emotion.
"We should check the Residential Area. She may have gone there looking for one of us." I set off for the train immediately, followed by a slower and more apprehensive Shion. I stated that our destination was for the Residential Area and sat on one of the padded seats. The doors closed just as Shion stepped into the train, and it took off at a great speed. She had her arms folded before her, clenching and unclenching her fists in anxiety, her eyes at her feet. Finally, she looked to me.
"Ziggy, I shouldn't have pried, back on the shuttle. It's your own business, not mine."
"It's all right," I assured her. "If it had been you telling the story, I would have asked the same question." Truth be told, I wouldn't have asked, but I didn't want any more worries on Shion's shoulders. There was enough weighing all of us down after so much had happened. The cold, set unease on her face lifted slightly with a sad smile, but as the train slowed, her face was a slight gray color. Our transport stopped altogether, and the two of us, along with a few others, piled out of the train and headed into the Residential Area. The first thing we were greeted with was Jr.'s red face as he dashed up to us.
"Where's MOMO?!" he asked in a loud, obtrusive voice.
"We think that she may have come back here, looking for one of us," I answered in a cold voice. Jr. stared at me, a look of disbelief on his face. Then his face contorted in anger, and his fist clenched like he wanted to punch me.
"You lost her?!" His words stung, a deep spike driven through my chest. "You stupid cyborg, I'll-"
"Jr.!" Shion started, her own face flushed. "You know as well as I do that MOMO stayed behind of her own accord. It's no one's fault that we can't find her." She breathed a long sigh and pushed her glasses up the bridge of her nose. "She's probably just waiting in her room."
"Like hell," Jr. murmured, his strangely blue eyes glaring up at me. I grimaced as I mentally pulled the great imaginary spike from my body and gathered myself together. I walked past Jr. without another word, although I could still here the curses he was muttering under his breath. Unfazed, we entered the Residential Area, where the moans and cries of the injured civilians filled my ears. My first stop was MOMO's room. On my way there, I couldn't help to remember the promise I had made to her while she slept in that room. I remembered the fear in my heart when the Federation ships attacked, and I forced my way into MOMO's room. I closed my eyes in attempts to wipe away the feelings as I reached her door.
First, I raised my hand to knock on the door, but instead, I tuned my scanners to searching her room from where I stood. There were no signs of life, let alone the one little Realian I was searching for. Defeated, I returned to the main hallway to join Shion and Jr. They both held expectant looks on their faces, but I shook my head in response. Jr. growled, and, without warning, screamed at the top of his lungs, venting his frustration. I couldn't help to stop and think that Jr. was acting exactly the way I felt inside. Stubbornly, I shoved aside my emotions and continued walking down the hall.
"Allen!" Shion called from beside me. I looked up, having totally missed seeing her co-worker carrying a large first-aid box down the hallway. He turned with a smile and walked quickly toward us. Just as he stopped, my emotions broke free of the hold I was keeping them under.
"Have you seen MOMO?!" I asked quickly. Shion glanced up at me quickly, then back to her red-headed friend. Allen's face screwed up in confusion, possibly at my sudden outburst, or maybe at the fact that I had no idea where MOMO was.
"No," he started, looking from me to the red-faced Jr and back, "she's not back yet? I thought she was with you." Quickly, I shoved my feelings back into the darkness of my mind and continued in a calmer voice.
"She stayed behind to treat the injured, but she wasn't there when we returned. We thought she might have come back on her own..." I looked down at Jr., and it seemed as if he had calmed down slightly, although there was a pinched annoyance on his face.
"Damn, where the hell is she?" He paused to run a hand over his face slowly, then looked up at me with a different expression altogether. He actually looked ... normal. "All right, I'll get our 100-Series to start searching. They shouldn't have any trouble, being the same model and all." Surprised at his sudden change, I nodded and thanked him.
"Thanks. We've eliminated the Gnosis within the Colony, but there isn't any guarantee they won't be back." There was a silence, then Jr. turned to leave, most likely headed to the bridge. There was also a silence between Shion and Allen. The latter's face had turned redder than his hair, and he started to inch backwards.
"Well, uh... I've got to take care of these wounded people, but... I'll see you later, Chief... I hope you find MOMO soon..." He backed away, but as he did, I could see a faint smile hovering on Shion's face. She then turned to me.
"We should follow Jr., so we know where to go when they find MOMO."
"Yeah," I said quietly, "when they find her." She placed a comforting hand on my arm and smiled encouragingly.
"Don't worry. They'll find MOMO. We probably just missed her somewhere, that's all." Her hand gently pushed me forward, and we began walking after Jr. After walking in silence for a few moments, I turned my eyes to my friend.
"Shion," I caught her attention as she turned to look at me, "do you really think that MOMO, as smart as she is, left the Foundation without waiting for us to return?" She was silent. I was about to prompt her into speaking when she shrugged.
"I don't know." Her eyes went to the floor. "I really don't know what to think. I don't want to think of the worst that could happen, because then I'll worry too much. I don't want to think that she's waiting on the bridge for us, either. In the little time I've known the two of you, I've come to think of you as good friends, and MOMO feels more like a daughter than a stranger. I worry about her, and I'm so scared that something bad may have happened to her." She looked up again, and I was startled to see her eyes covered with misty tears. "Do... Do you understand?" I wanted to tell her that I understood, that I thought of MOMO like a daughter. But I had locked my emotions far back in my mind.
I looked away from her wet eyes and to the ground, where my feet were methodically plodding toward the train. I didn't have any answers.
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AN: So so sorry for the lack of updates, everyone, but I think I'm finally back on track with this story. Thanks for the support and you'll probably see another chapter soon!