7th November
Remus and I have had another tutoring session. I didn't do very well. I feel so unhappy.
11th November
I really can't be bothered to write.
16th November
Potions sucks.
18th November
Spending a lot of time in the Owlery. My favourite school owl, Kinesis, is often there. I sit and talk to him, tell him everything. As I feed him Owl Treats, he tilts his head and stares at me with amber eyes, as if he understands.
22nd November
Mum wrote today. A load of garbage about how the weddings going. I read the first two lines of the letter, then chucked it in the bin.
27th November
Rachel was upset today - she and Daniel broke up. Daniel dumped her to go out with Mindy Goodchild, a total cow in Hufflepuff. I swear, if Mindy had as many brains as she did make-up sets, she would be the next Minister for Magic.
3rd December
Christmas is getting near. Spending some time in the library with Anna. Sirius is hanging around.
Still 3rd Dec, TOTAL GENIUS!
James has just GOT to believe me after this!
Sirius has thought of an idea!
'Truth Potion!' he announced, after killing me with suspense. 'Porter has threatened me with it enough times to know what it is. Even with just one drop, the drinker is forced to tell the truth for a whole hour!'
'How will that help Lily?' asked Anna.
'Well, we drug Paul, then question him in front of James! Simple!'
He beamed at us, obviously pleased with his idea.
'Erm… not so simple, actually.' said Anna smoothly. 'First we have to actually get Paul to take it - maybe hidden in a cake or something - then we need to find somewhere where we won't be disturbed, and then we need to actually get James into the same room as Lily, and then it'll be simple.'
'Well, yeah - but I thought it was a good idea…' said Sirius, faltering under Anna's derogatory stare.
I looked between them both.
'It's not that good.' I said. 'It's brilliant!'
December 5th
I'm really sorry I haven't been writing - I've been too depressed to even lift a quill. Sirius and I finally managed to get hold of some Veritaserum (a.k.a Truth Potion) from the private store.
It was all set up. We got a plate of sardines from the kitchens - apparently they're Paul's favourite - ugh. The potion was at the ready.
I stop Paul after class. I absolutely hate being nice to him.
'Hi Paul.' I say through gritted teeth. 'I've got something to show you.'
'What?' he grins at me, raising his eyebrows in glee to his gorilla friend.
'Just something that you'll really like.' I say.
His eyebrows shoot up way past his fringe.
I lead him towards the abandoned girls toilets. Well, abandoned apart from Moaning Myrtle, who spends her time wallowing in toilet water and flooding the place.
'Why're we here?' says Paul.
I tell him the truth, but he gets the wrong idea. 'So we won't get caught.'
He grins deviously. I shudder, repulsed.
'I thought you might like some sardines - I hear they're your favourite.'
'Oh, thanks.' he says. Sitting down on the chair at the table I prepared earlier, he chows down on the disgusting fish.
Suddenly, Sirius comes in, leading James.
My heart stops at the sight of him.
James goes red, then backs away, muttering angrily to Sirius. 'What's going on?'
'Just hear us out, OK?' says Sirius firmly. James avoids my eyes.
Paul has fished the sardines. I take a deep breath.
'Paul?' I say. 'What happened on the 31st October of this year?'
'Sardines.' he replies.
'What?' says Sirius.
'Sardines.' he repeats.
Sirius fishes out the empty potion bottle from his pocket.
'Oh no…' he groans, staring at the label. 'This isn't Veritaserum - it's Victaserum! We gave him the wrong Potion!'
I stare numbly at the bottle in Sirius' hand.
'I don't have time for this…' mumbles James, striding towards the door.
'Wait!' I say, jumping towards the handle. My fingers close over his. He pulls his hand back, as if burnt. I instantly feel hurt.
'What?' demands James.
'Look,' I say, trying to keep my voice reasonable calm. 'Obviously both mine and Sirius' words aren't good enough for you, so I'm trying to get some proof.'
'Proof of what?' he yells angrily. 'Look, Lily. I know what I saw, and that's proof enough for me. If you want to make some stupid stunt of the fact that you're some sort of two-timing slag, then be my guest! Just don't try to get me in on it, OK?'
With that he pulls open the door and scrambles out as fast as he can.
Sirius touches my arm.
'You OK?'
I shake my head, fighting back the tears. I don't know why I care so much. There is nothing I can do now.
'Sardines?' says Paul.
I kick him in the shins. Hard.