Chapter 5

Well, there you had it. The sign. In this one it's both Seth and Summer's feelings. His in italics and Summer's not.

I'm sorry for not updating sooner and I'm sorry if at any time you get confused because it switches from present to past.

Outside, freezing cold on his doorstep. "Cohen, open up you ass."

"Seth, sorry." She whispered to herself. She'd better get used to calling him his real name.

I went to get the door, knowing it'd be Summer. Though I didn't know what to expect.

It was like a bolt out of the blue.

The door swung open with myself standing in front of it.

"Can I come in?" She asked.

"Sure, unless you plan on staying out there all night."

Summer took one look at me, first to my legs, then my face. Her expression unreadable.

"No, I uh… need to talk to you."

"I know, you said." I moved out the way to let her through.

She was wearing the 'P.S I love you' t-shirt and jeans, I thought. She looked so cute in them.

I wondered if the top had any significance for her coming to talk to me.

I remember it clearly now. He took me to his bedroom so we could talk. I hadn't actually planned what I was going to say. And that's when I burst into floods of tears.

Just entering his room brought back the memories.

"What's wrong?" I asked, rubbing her back.

"Seth, I… "

"It's ok, it's ok. Come and sit down."

"Is it you and Zach?"

She nodded.

I had no idea what to say to that. I wondered if he had hurt her, but she didn't look bruised from what I could see. It could only mean one thing.

"We've broken up." She confessed.

As her tears kept on falling, the slower I stroked her back. My hand stopped, and she looked up at me.

"It was because of you Seth. Zach and I were talking about 'signs', when you see something and it makes you realise something. Well, his sister was getting married and we were going, but she called him to say she saw a sign that it was going to rain so she thought she'd better call the wedding off. But Zach reassured her and said it would be ok. He asked me to speak to her, to convince her, but I wasn't sure. We went along to get on our flight, then it was I who saw the sign…"

"Summer, it doesn't make sense, you're rambling."

"Something I caught from you I guess." She looked at me again with that longing, shimmering in her eyes. I waited for her to continue.

"This sign… it was a young boy of five or so. He had jet-black curly hair, deep brown eyes and in his hands he was playing with a plastic toy horse. It all made sense that I should be with you Seth… He looked so much like you it was unreal." Her voice dropped to a whisper and she hung her head.

After I had told him, the silence seemed unbearable. I remember his face, his expression and those eyes so wide.

What could he possibly say to something like that?

I didn't know what to say. Normally I was so good with not being able to shut up, but now…

You drop a bombshell like that Summer.

You remember 4th Grade don't you Summer? The sign you saw, well the exact same thing happened back then.

It was lunchtime, and I was sitting by the tree, playing with Captain Oats, then you strode up to me.

"What a sad, sad loser you are." You muttered.

It dented me so much, that for the rest of fourth grade and fifth, I stopped loving you.

Actually, it was more like the next three weeks afterwards.

It's funny how you don't remember things like that, do you?

That's why I didn't know what to say.

Of course! How could I be so stupid!

No wonder he never said anything.

4th Grade.

I call it the grade I was bitchy the most. I was a right little madam.

Grade 5 and 6 I wasn't so much… I really did care what the other kids thought.

By tenth grade onwards, I was back to full bitchiness mode.

But that one day of fourth grade, the sign ringed true. Yet I was so nasty to him.

Oh my god.

There's no way in hell he'd forgive me now.

"Summer I… I don't know what to say."

I could see the confusion in his eyes.

"Just say something, anything. I still love you Seth."

She hugged me so tight I could barely breathe.

"I… I don't know. I'm sorry." I whispered.

"I'm sorry too." She began crying again, and run out of my room.

Once again, I felt empty. Still Seth Cohen – nothing changes.