Kællupha Serren
This extraordinary and enigmatic name
Which my throbbing heart does proclaim
A face so cool, so calm, so kind
That haunts my ever cautious mind
At night I can't sleep free of fears
For in my every dream she reappears
Her hand gently caressing my cheek
Turning me into someone mild and meek.
Oh, you never cease to torment me
And yet it is you who have set me free
All these new sensations
Which seem like great aberrations
I am immersed in them, unable to escape, not wanting to
All this I endure because of that encounter with you
And yet, though I am tortured so
I know I shouldn't have let you go
It was too much, to show me such love
And now I cringe and wince and sob
Because I shall never know again
The love you shared with me then
That memory that sears me even now
It has comforted me somehow
Knowing that once, though for but a moment
In an angels arms, my life I spent
Please, I want to see you once more
Though the very sight of me you may abhor
But I must hold on to that sliver of hoping
That it is not for naught that I am so groping
I am not the man I once was
A monster, a vile human carcass
But you have healed me and warmed my heart
And now I loathe the moment we had to part
Allow me at least to say this to you
For that instant when you loved me, thank you
Forgive me for realizing so late
For being utterly blinded by my hate
I shall forever want and miss
The memory of that heartrending kiss
You don't know how I yearn to be
Where you are, so earnestly
Fool that I was, I never knew
That you had given a love so true
I merely stood without response
Making you go away at once
But how, oh how can I find you once more
To speak of the love that I'm yearning for
I'm trapped in a snare of my own making
For this stupidity, now my heart is breaking
Was it a nightmare or a wonderful dream?
A fantasy is all it would seem
But why is every detail so etched in my every thought
And why I am I weak from feelings I have fought
I now face a dark and melancholy future
Bleeding from wounds that nothing can suture
Strange that now when the empire has truly shone
I'm miserable and I am entirely alone
The bitterness of your farewell
Has plunged me into the depths of hell
The suffering I am experiencing is a small price to pay
For the grave sins I've committed before today
I know that I've done some unforgivable deeds
And I'm on the painful path where my destiny leads
But if granted one last glance at your face
I'll accept isolation for the rest of my days
I whisper your name constantly
They think I'm losing my sanity
It could be that I am going mad
If in loving you that is to be had
In flames so immense I now burn
But not of hatred but of love spurned
I shall find you, no matter what
You must be well aware of that
What you had done has left me incomplete
So I shall strive to become replete
O wait for me, and let me find
Some peace of soul and mind
