bDisclaimer:
I don't own Harry Potter, or anything related to his world, and no profit
is being made.i Yes, you can start throwing marshmallows at me now.
I'm sorry, I'm sorry. Encountered some major writers block and was
generally disheartened about my story. I've spent the last couple of weeks
agonizing over what I would do, and I have changed my main storyline
somewhat. My theory was too complicated. Unfortunately. Some other
storylines have been discontinued for the time being, although they may
come back when I'm in a bit of a lull. Of course, they only existed in my
head, so you won't even know they're gone.
The old chapters have been edited, and there's a small change here and
there. Nothing worth looking back at really, just for my peace of mind.
Thanks to everyone who emailed me about updating, and of course to Laurie
for prodding me several times. prods back
Enjoy!/i
NOTE: I know some people who will be glad that I have finally spell checked this monster. Sorry I didn't do it yesterday, but I was just so happy about having finished it.
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Ghosts from the past
The following morning, Harry woke up to an empty room once again. After getting dressed, he went down to the kitchen and to his surprise, found it to be empty too. Glancing at his new watch, he saw that it was only 7:30 am, and wondered what in the world would have caused such an early start for everyone, Ron in particular.
Although the plates had been cleared off the table, the rest of breakfast was still sitting on the table. As Harry decided to sit down and silence the rumbling sound in his stomach, Remus walked in. He was carrying a large book under his arm, and seemed in no way surprised to find only Harry at the table.
'Morning Remus, would you have any idea where everyone's gone off to?'
'Looks like they haven't filled you in on the new routine yet,' said Remus. 'Ron, Hermione and Ginny usually start working on the house around 7, and Molly has taken up some business for the Order during the mornings. The twins are at the Burrow, as usual during weekdays, and Arthur's at work.'
Harry could do nothing but stare at Remus, mouth agape. Surely he hadn't heard that right. Ron? Up and about at 7 during his holidays? Or during any day for that matter? It just didn't seem quite right.
'You might want to shut your mouth,' said Remus, 'you never know what might fly in, after all. It just goes to show that people can change, doesn't it?'
Harry nodded. 'Then I'd better hurry up and start helping them. Which room are they working on now?'
'They're working on my room, actually, so I've been banned to the guest room for the next couple of days. But if you wouldn't mind, Harry, I would like you to stay for a bit. I brought down your present with me.'
Harry had been wondering would give him that apparently required privacy.
Remus placed the book he had carried under his arm in front of Harry. Remus placed the book he had carried as he walked into the kitchen in front of Harry. It was a light colour blue, and read: 'Baby book: Memoirs of the expecting witch and new mum.' Harry looked at Remus as though he had gone mad. 'No offence, Remus, but somehow I don't think I'll be an expecting witch any time soon.'
Remus threw Harry a mock scowl. 'This isn't for you to write in, Harry. It's about you. It's your mum's pregnancy and baby journal. I knew she had kept one, but I always thought it had been destroyed. Somehow Sirius got hold of it, however, and managed to keep it for you all these years. There's even a note on it, addressed to Sirius, and instructing him to give this to you on your sixteenth birthday, in case anything would happen. Go on, open it.'
Remus gave the book a push in Harry direction. Harry felt both shocked and torn. He wondered why Sirius had never told him about this. He longed to know more of his mother and her thoughts, but on the other hand it felt wrong to read the journal. He didn't know that much about journals, but he did know that they were meant to be private. However, his mother had obviously wanted him to read it. Even though he thought reading it might make him feel like a voyeur, he decided to read it.
He opened the book to find what must be a photo of himself staring back at him. He looked awfully wrinkly and tiny in that photo. Beneath it were his name and birth details. Harry felt odd reading them. He had never known that his time of birth was 11:03 pm, or that he had weighed 7 pounds 2 ounces. One more time it struck him that there were so many little things he didn't know about. Mind, he had never really exerted himself at finding them out either, but it was still nice to know. On the next page, he found his mother's first entry.
iDear someone, I have decided to call you Spotty from now on, as you have yet to be born and named properly. Your dad is already referring to you as Jimmy Junior, well, not if I can help it! You have been growing inside me for 4 months now, and have finally stopped making me spew out my insides daily. So, thank you for that. It really is the strangest feeling, knowing that a new life is growing inside of you. Magic in its purest form, in my opinion. As we speak, your father is acting silly again. He reckons he can teach you spells before you are born. Says he's read somewhere that foetuses can subconsciously store information. So now, your father keeps tapping his wand on my tummy, apparently to 'wake you up'. When he's through with that, he'll teach you a new spell. So far, you have supposedly learned 'alohomora' and 'wingardium leviosa'. I do wonder what he'll teach you next. I don't even want to know what would happen if he taught you the Stunning spell, and you happened to be the first foetus to perform wandless magic. I'd probably be stunned permanently, ha! But all silliness on a stick. Silly as your dad is behaving, he's trying to be as involved in this as I am. He walks around with a pillow under his robes, even though I'm not even showing yet. I told him he'd have to change that pillow to a Bludger as the months progress, to add some weight. I've no doubt he'll do that too!/i
Harry continued leafing through the entries, until he remembered where he was. Looking up, he saw that Remus was still sitting across from him, watching him intently.
'Did you read it?' said Harry.
'I must admit I read some of it, yes. I know I probably shouldn't have, as it was obviously meant for you, but I couldn't help it. I discovered it only two weeks after the fight, two weeks after Sirius-,' Remus paused. 'Anyhow, I needed to know what it was before giving it to you. Do you understand?'
Harry nodded. He still felt extremely guilty for having had a hand in the loss of Remus' last old friend, and he would do anything in his power to make him feel better. He understood that Remus has read the book, because it was one of the last ties to his old friends, and he couldn't blame him for that.
Remus smiled. 'I'm glad. The note I mentioned is in the back, with the final entry. If anything will prove what a talented and special witch your mum was, that will.
Harry quickly sought out the last page. It was dated 30 October 1980.
iDearest Harry, You will have undoubtedly noticed the change of tone in my writing. Over the last year, we have been on an emotional rollercoaster. As I've told you so many times, you have been the light in our lives in the gravest of times. I have felt danger approaching for some time, but it's ever more urgent now. We have been in danger for years, but never like this. I fear for our lives. Something is approaching, and I do not know if your father and I will make it out alive. We love so much, Harry, and we would die for you. You're so precious to us, and though neither you now they realize it yet, to the rest of the world as well. There is so much we want you, no, we need you to know, which is the reason the nature of these entries has changed. Because we might not be around to instruct you, I'll have this diary to do it for us. I you are reading this without us present, then I am so, so sorry Harry. I hope the boys have done a great job bringing you up, but I fear things may happen that will prevent that. Please make sure you read this journal carefully, and know that we will always love you.
Love, mum.
Harry's eyes had gone misty and it took him some blinking, and a couple of deep breaths to regain his composure. Saving his questions till later, he turned his attention to the note to Sirius.
iDear Sirius, If you read this, something will have happened to James and I. Hopefully, Harry will be fine. He must be. Please take care of him for us. We have asked the same thing of Remus and peter. Tell him how much we love him, and how proud we are. Tell him we'll always be with him. Enclosed you will find my journal. It is imperative that Harry gets it, and reads it, but not before his sixteenth birthday. He might not understand, too many things could go wrong. Thank you for being our friend and fare well,
Love, Lily./i
After making sure his voice was steady, and he had pushed back the tears that had pushed against his eyes, Harry looked Remus in the eye. 'How did she know? She only wrote that entry the day before they were killed. She seems so sure, how could she have known? It reads like she knew this was her last entry. How did she know, Remus?'
'I wish I could tell you, Harry,' Remus sighed. 'That entry caught me by surprise as well. To me, the most baffling part is that she suspected we wouldn't be able to raise you.'
'No one ever told me you were supposed to.'
Remus looked unspeakably sad. 'We made a pact promising we would take care of each others loved ones should anything happen. By the time I heard of their deaths, Sirius had been sent to Azkaban, Peter was, for all we knew, dead, and you were well on your way to the Dursleys. Of course I would have tried to take care of you, but Dumbledore wouldn't even tell me where you were. I doubt I would have been any good anyway, I was a depressed drunk for the first years after Voldemort's fall, and I was never able to hold onto a job for long because of the whole werewolf-business.'
'How did Sirius get the journal?'
Remus shrugged. 'I wouldn't know. Your mum was quite the smart witch, probably as smart as Hermione, but I have never heard of a spell that would move an object to the care of a designated person in the event of the object's owner's death. Maybe she activated some sort of spell during the attack. Maybe Sirius found it in the debris.'
Remus walked around the table and hesitantly put his hand on Harry's shoulder. 'Are you okay?'
Harry nodded. Finally, he had something more than some photos and other people's memories. It was as though he had just received hundreds of letters from his mother, addressed solely to him.
'Your mother obviously placed a lot of importance in you reading this journal. Am I safe to assume you want to start straight away?'
Harry nodded again. 'I'll go up to my room if that's all right. Could you please tell the others that I'll join them as soon as I'm done?'
'Sure, don't rush it, Harry. I'll tell them, and I'll also ask them to leave you alone for a while. Alright?'
Harry smiled gratefully. 'Thanks for everything, Remus.'
He spent the next several hours poring over his mother's journal, reading all her descriptions of her pregnancy and everything that came with it. All entries were written in the same style as the first one, addressed to Spotty. She wrote about the times she felt him move for the first time, how her eating a piece of pumpkin pie would settle him down if he was keeping her up at night, about her expanding waistline, swollen ankles and all types of pregnancy ailments and quirks.
She also described the lengths to which James, Sirius, Remus and Wormtail went to make her laugh when she was feeling crabby. She wrote about the weekend they had all placed a bet on who would make the best pregnant woman. They had all transfigured their bellies to the size of Lily's, who was 8 months along, and had found it a lot harder than expected. Finally, Sirius had been proclaimed winner, after polishing of a bowl of gherkins with whipped cream, having at least 3 bathroom breaks during a meal, riding a bike without bumping his knees into his belly, and going the weekend without Butterbeer or Ogden's Finest. Harry laughed out loud at the mental picture of Sirius acting as a pregnant woman.
But the thing he liked best about the journal was that in almost every entry his mum wrote how much she loved him. Harry thought there must be some truth in all those people saying that you can never hear too many 'I love you's'.
However, a few months after his birth, the tone of the entries changed. An entry dated 12 April 1981 read:
iMy dearest Harry,
There are so many things happening right now. Voldemort's craving for blood seems to be growing by the day. And now we have found out who will have to defeat him. Your father and I are deeply distressed about the prophecy, as are Frank and Alice. You have undoubtedly heard about it by now. It is, after all, by all accounts your destiny. We will be with you every step of the way, whether you can see us or not. Because I feel great danger is coming in our direction, and I can only hope we will all be able to stay together. If not, then you might have no one to guide you. You're special, love. I knew that from the first time I laid eyes on you. You're special in ways you can't even begin to understand. Unless I'm very much mistaken, you'll have noticed some strange things happening by now. Don't fear it, Harry, and don't fight it. It is your destiny, and you will use your powers for good. We love you.
Love, Mum/i
There will several entries like this, all stressing that he was special, all foreseeing that strange things would happen, saying that 'it' was his destiny, that he shouldn't fear 'it', and that he should do research. What kind of research was also left unsaid.
Harry could only assume that his mother had somehow foreseen the unwanted Legilimency, or the way he had picked up his aunt's emotions. He just wondered why she had been so vague. Why, when she knew she would most likely die, didn't she write whatever it was she wanted him to know, instead of all this cryptic stuff?
His heart cried out to his mother, feeling so much closer to her after having read so many of her thoughts. His urge to speak to her was now greater than ever. As he turned the last page, a blinding flash of light came from the book, which wrapped the room in brightness. Then, as fast as it had come, the light died again.
As Harry opened his eyes, he saw that there was now a new page behind what he had thought was the last page. In it was a photo of his parents, somehow looking older, no, wiser; than they had looked in any other photo he had seen of them. His dad was waving enthusiastically as him mum was both smiling and crying at the same time, blowing him kisses. Harry could have sworn they could see him, and that they recognized him. As he softly touched his mother's face, writing in green ink appeared under the photo.
INever fear, Harry. We will always be there for you. We love you!
Mum & DadI
Harry snapped the book shut and sprinted downstairs, looking for Remus. He found him reading a book in the kitchen. Panting, Harry slapped the book on the table, in front of Remus, and pointed at the new page.
'Could you please tell me what in the world is going on? This page just appeared out of thin air, and that photo somehow looks different.'
Remus looked puzzled. 'It just appeared? True, I haven't seen that page before either, or that photo for that matter.' He looked lost in thought. 'I'm sorry, Harry, but I don't quite know what to make of it. It seems like Lily might have put some additional spells on it. She probably made it so that it only appeared when it was well and truly in your possession, or when you had read it all.'
Harry slumped in his chair. He knew that was the most likely explanation, but for a split second he had hoped that it might have been something more, although he didn't know what.
Remus looked at him carefully. 'So, how did it go? Found some answers?'
Harry shook his head. 'Just more questions, really. You wouldn't be able to tell me what this thing is my mum tells me not to be afraid of?'
'Unfortunately not. I read about that too. But now that we are on that subject, did you notice anything out of the ordinary happening?'
Harry denied that anything had happened, still not feeling sure about exactly what had happened. He thought his former professor looked slightly disappointed at hearing this, but the next moment he looked like nothing was wrong.
'Very well. Not to worry then,' said Remus. 'Dumbledore asked me to tell you he will be around for your Occlumency lesson later tonight.'
'Sure.' Harry didn't mind Occlumency that much anymore. He was glad that he didn't have to spend any more extra "quality time" with Snape, and his skills had been improving rapidly. He had even managed to keep Dumbledore from entering his mind while he was sleeping, although it had taken him 10 minutes to do so. 'I think I'll look up the others now.'
Harry walked into Remus' room only to find himself in the middle of a paint fight. Rollers and brushers were sailing through the room at high speed, and Ron, Hermione and Ginny were crouched behind a sheet-covered armchair, the bed, and a chest of drawers respectively.
He was grateful for his Seeker-reflexes as he heard Ginny cry out 'new target!', and he dropped to the floor. He heard several solid objects colliding with the door behind him. 'I give! I give!' he cried out, and looked up carefully. But even his reflexes couldn't save him from the inevitable attack as Ron dove on top of him, pinning him facedown to the ground, and Ginny started to paint his hair red.
He glanced up to see Hermione grinning down at him. Her hair looked very much like a bucket of paint had been dumped over it. 'Fighting is useless, Harry. They have decided to Weasleyfy us.'
'Which is a great honour, if you ask me,' Ginny replied. 'Besides, the world looks a lot more colourful once you join the Red Side. There, you're done!' Ginny dabbed a final spot of red on his nose.
'Ron! You can get off him now. I highly doubt that Harry is enjoying having you on his back. Unless, of course, you might be enjoying it?' Ginny added with a sly smile.
Ron jumped up faster than he would have had he been stung in the behind by a bee, exclaiming 'eeewww, eeewww', as the other were laughing.
Harry finally managed to take a look around the room and the sight wasn't too pretty. Harry's hair now matched 1 white wall and 3 brown walls that were covered in red blobs.
Hermione took one look at his face before she started defending herself. 'We were supposed to do two white walls, and two red walls with white squares in the middle. You know, to give it a bit of depth, and a seventies- feel. However, genius over here,' she nudged at Ron, 'though the walls might look better spotted. And so he started throwing our equipment around. As you can see – Oh! Honestly, Ron! Just leave it!' she exclaimed suddenly.
Harry sniggered as her looked over at Ron, who was now trying to make neat circles out of the blobs covering the walls.
Ginny, who had obviously gotten quite as efficient in spotting one of Ron's and Hermione's rows a mile away, quickly interrupted. 'Well, we won't be able to do anything about those walls now; the paint will have to dry first. I'll just go down and make us some sandwiches, shall I?'
As Ginny left for the kitchen, the others sat down on the sheet-covered floors.
'Ron?' Harry said. 'Have you figured out what you want to do about your NEWTs yet? Did you ask Snape if he would let you take Potions even with that E?'
'I asked all right, and he had the grandest time denying that request. No worries, though. I hadn't really expected him to let me take it anyway. I still haven't chosen my subject, though, and mum's having a right fit about it. She keeps reminding me that it can't be that hard to pick NEWTS out of 'only' 8 OWLs. She doesn't even care I got as much as Fred and George combined. I still can't believe I got one OWL more than you, Harry. It's amazing that I actually passed History of Magic. Of course, we can't all get perfect scores like our Hermione-' Ron stopped at the sight of Harry's face.
'I truly am glad for you, Ron,' said Harry, 'and I'm sorry you didn't get an O for Potions, but I'd greatly appreciate it if you never mentioned the History of Magic exam again.' It had taken him a lot of strength to say this in a quiet and composed voice. It wasn't that he wanted to put Ron down, but the memory of that day was still too painful. And not the least painful was the vision he'd had during that exam.
Ron's eyes grew wide as apprehension dawned on him. Hermione quickly intervened.
'Well, I for one don't know what I shall do. I'm afraid 12 NEWTs will not be a possibility, and I'm still thinking about what I want to do when we finish school.
'Let's just try to make it out of school alive, shall we?' said Harry grimly. He had decided this would be the time to discuss the prophecy with his friends.
They reacted not as shocked as Harry might have expected had he not spoken to Ginny, but not as optimistically as she had either. His heart sank as he saw the tears in Hermione's eyes, and Ron's white face, when he recited the prophecy. He couldn't help but be slightly surprised at their reaction. After Ginny's optimism, he had allowed himself a little bit of hope.
'Didn't you expect anything like this? I mean, Ginny said-,'
'You talked to Ginny about this before us?' Ron interrupted, but he quickly shut his mouth as Hermione pinched his arm.
'Well,' she said, evidently searching for words, 'yes, we expected something of this nature. But it's still quite a shock to actually hear the words, don't you agree?'
Harry couldn't agree more, and Hermione continued. 'However, as Ginny undoubtedly told you, a prophecy's only a prophecy. Besides, you know how I feel about Seeing and Divination. Lucky guesswork, if you ask me. I understand lots of prophecies come true, but there are some cases where the people involved found a way around them. And I say, that's what we will try to do.' Her voice was sounding much more determined now, and Ron nodded fiercely.
'We won't let you deal with You-Know-Who alone,' said Ron.
'Please, Ron!' Hermione exclaimed. 'We've been practicing for almost three weeks now. Just say it. Voldemort.'
'If you had the memories that I have, Hermione, you would think twice before saying that name.' Ron had a grave look on his face.
Harry felt deeply ashamed of himself. Since his arrival, he hadn't enquired once after his best friend's brainscarring.
'I'm so sorry, Ron. How are things going with those memories?' said Harry.
'It's going,' Ron said dully. 'They've tried to get them out, but it looks like that's not possible. I've found out who they belong too. They're mostly memories of Aurors, from You-Know-Who's heyday. I've even got some of Moody's memories in there. Apparently, Aurors were given the option to have some memories tapped into the brains, to dull the pain of what they'd seen. Apparently, the memories are only taken out for Auror-training, to prepare new recruits for what they might see.'
Harry could now stop wondering why Ron wasn't looking that dashing. If even Moody had used these brains, then those memories must be some of the worst in existence. Probably bad enough to give even the bravest person nightmares. And if there was one thing Harry could understand, it was nightmares.
'Silencing Charm?' he asked quietly, already suspecting the answer. Ron nodded. 'Yeah, I get a Dreamless Sleeping Potion once a week, but I'm not allowed to take it more often. Apparently, you need to dream to work through things that happen during the day. It's getting better, though. I have learned how to oppress the memories during the day. I just don't get a lot of sleep, that's all.'
'Well, same here, mate,' Harry couldn't help grinning slightly. 'Looks like we've both been putting Silencing Charms on our beds.'
A small sob to the left turned Harry's attention to Hermione. 'You too?' he asked, surprised.
Hermione nodded. 'I keep hearing Bellatrix Lestrange when I close my eyes. It's getting a bit better, but I fear we might have to get used to it. Who knows what other things we might see.'
Harry's heart went out to his friends. If it hadn't been for his stupidity, they wouldn't be having nightmares. The guilt welled up in him again.
Then a quiet voice spoke from across the room. Ginny had come in again, unnoticed, carrying a tray of sandwiches and 4 bottles of Butterbeer. 'Don't go there, Harry. We've been through this. We don't blame you for what happened, so neither should you. What's this anyway? Group therapy? Come on, let's eat.'
Harry hadn't noticed he was starving, but he wouldn't let her off the hook that easily. As Ron started stuffing his face with a turkey sandwich, and Hermione looked on in disgust, Harry pulled Ginny aside.
'How do you do that?' he said.
'Do what?' she asked innocently.
'Know what I'm thinking all the time.'
'Oh, Harry,' Ginny smiled, 'it's not really that hard. Your body language is extremely easy to read. When you want to be alone, you slouch slightly, and have this grave look on your face. When you're not telling the truth, your eyes dart all over the place and you rub the tip of your left foot with your right. When you're emotional, you focus on one spot like it's the most interesting thing in the world, and your breathing gets a bit heavier. And when you're feeling guilty you slouch, bite your lower lip, run your hands through your hair and get this absent look in your eyes.'
Harry wanted to argue with her, but after some consideration, he found that she was right.
'And now,' Ginny continued, 'you have come to the conclusion that I'm right, and you're thinking about how brilliant I am.'
'Almost,' Harry laughed. Then, he remembered something he had been meaning to ask her.
'Ginny?' he said tentatively. 'What happened between you and Dean?'
She tried to smile as she spoke. 'Him? Couldn't handle me not telling him where I was over the summer. Missed me too much, apparently.'
'Two can play this body language game, Gin. Come on, spill.'
Ginny started speaking very fast, as if she felt she might not be able to continue if she paused. 'I saw him, okay! We all saw him. We were allowed to go to Diagon Alley for 2 hours to get some ice cream, and he was at Florean's. He was snogging Maisy Catasin.'
'WHAT?' Harry exclaimed. Maisy Catasin? From Slytherin?!'
Ginny nodded. 'He sent me an owl the next day, about how he didn't like me being away all summer. Never mentioned her, of course.' Ginny was bright red in the face, but Harry could see that this time she wasn't blushing. She was very, very angry.
He decided to move away from the subject for the time being, as it obviously wasn't improving the collective mood in the room. He couldn't believe Dean was capable of something like that. How could he cheat on Ginny, with a Slytherin no less? Harry found it quite unbelievable.
As they were all quietly enjoying their lunch, something occurred to Harry.
'Ron? Tonks said you would be joining training. Why is that?'
'As I said, the brain has transferred mostly Auror-memories. Now I've got knowledge of several big fights between the Death Eaters and Aurors. I know what things work when fighting them, and what is just a waste of time. I've had lots of time to observe their strengths and weaknesses, without actually being in danger.'
'Awesome,' said Harry. 'I have a feeling we might be needing that kind of knowledge soon enough.'
Another couple of moments were passed in silence, until Hermione spoke. 'Harry, don't you want to know what Voldemort is up to?' She shot Ron an unreadable look as he shuddered at the name.
Harry shrugged. 'According to the Daily Prophet, he's not up to much. I've seen a couple of disappearances on the Muggle-news, but I didn't think any of them were Voldemort-related.'
'Oh, Harry,' Hermione exclaimed, exasperatedly. 'What will it take for you to stop believing anything the Daily Prophet reports? Honestly!' She started to turn red, but continued quietly as she sensed Harry's bewilderment.
'It does seem like most Muggle-disappearances aren't magic-related, but there are some coincidences. Did you hear about Mary Deary?'
Harry couldn't say he had. The name certainly didn't ring any bells.
'She disappeared two weeks ago, apparently left a note saying she'd gone on a last-minute holiday. Her family didn't trust it, and filed a missing person's report. But get this-.' Hermione paused, 'she's Dennis and Colin Creevey's ex-aunt. Apparently, she recently divorced their mother's brother.' 'But that's not all,' she continued quickly. 'Just last week, a boy disappeared. The police is treating is as a runaway case. Robbie O'Dwyer left to play football on Tuesday night, but never got to the field. And this Robbie is Seamus's second cousin.'
Harry tried to take all this news in. Here he had been, all this time thinking that Voldemort was keeping quiet, biding his time. How wrong he had been. 'How did you guys find all this stuff out? It's not like those family relations are really apparent.'
'Fred and George, mostly. They reckon that if it affects a Gryffindor, we have a right to know. We've tried to get some more information from them, but they're pretty tight-lipped. Say we'll know in due time, whatever that may mean. Anyhow, they say Voldemort's up to his old tricks again. Remember that the years of his rise were marked with disappearances? However, we're talking about Muggles now, and those disappearances were always directly related to the wizarding world. What would he want with distant relatives of Muggleborn or mixed blood wizards?' Hermione had said this all a couple of breaths, musing to herself.
The discussed Voldemort until it was time for tea. At 7:30, Dumbledore arrived, and Harry went to the study for Occlumency. The study hadn't been fixed up yet, but it had been made liveable.
Harry sat down at the desk, facing the ancient headmaster. Dumbledore smiled at him.
'So far, you have been making excellent progress, better than anyone could have expected. You have become excellent at warding me off during eye contact, and you are getting better in your sleep as well. Now, I would like to start with installing an alarm.'
'An alarm, sir?' Harry frowned.
'Yes, I believe that would be the best description. It's meant to detect another presence in your head, so that you can see the difference between true and false information.'
Harry was still frowning.
'I will explain further. Your connection with Voldemort works two ways. The first way is when you have entered his consciousness. The information you gathered at those times has proved to be both important and accurate. We will be studying this further at a later date. If you could control this, it would be of great value. It is for this reason that I have decided not to teach you to close down completely during your sleep. Not only would it be unwholesome, as it would stop dreaming at all, but it would also disconnect a possibly valuable connection. This has been a very hard decision for me to make, but with the right alarm, everything should work out fine. It is when Voldemort enters your mind that we have to be careful. Last time, he made it seem like what you were seeing in the vision was the truth, and you didn't feel his presence in your mind. Now, every Legilimens will leave a certain signature, a hint of an emotion. The stronger the Legilimens, the harder this signature is to detect. Are you still with me on this, Harry?'
'But I don't understand. Last year you wanted me to be able to repel all visions, even the useful ones. What's changed? I just have to let him go ahead with reading my mind?'
'No, Harry, not go ahead. This only goes for your sleep. It's all about being able to see the difference between what is true and what is false. And things have changed drastically. It is imperative we know what Voldemort is up to, and we don't always know. This method will not put you in any danger, in fact, it will make you safer, because you will know if a vision has been manipulated or not.'
'Well, let's do it then. What do I have to do?'
'It's quite easy, actually, but it will not be pleasant. In fact, it will be painful. Emotionally, not physically, that is.' Dumbledore looked across the desk, slightly uncertain. But Harry was ready.
'Let's go for it.'
'Remember the last time I entered your mind. Remember the sensation. Remember how you could tell it was I entering your mind, instead of another wizard. Now, find my signature, the recognition, and give it a colour. And stay focused.'
Harry strained his mind until he found the slight hint of serenity that accompanied Dumbledore entering his mind. It was hard to detect, but as he found it he said, 'purple'. A bolt of purple lightning flashed before his eyes.
'Very good,' Dumbledore went on. 'Now for Professor Snape. The last time he entered you mind he left his signature as well. Look for the emotion that accompanied his presence. It will be harder to detect than mine, so remain focused.'
Harry was having a hard time fining Snape's signature. Then, he felt a very slight hint of what felt like jealousy. 'Green.' A bolt of green lighting flashed before his eyes.
'Excellent, Harry, you're doing very well.' Dumbledore's voice sounded like it was coming from very far away. 'Now, please stay relaxed while I ask you to do the next thing. I need you to remember the last time Voldemort entered your mind.'
Harry could feel heart beating faster. That was one of the last things he wanted to focus on, to remember so clearly. It was the time he had had the fake vision of Sirius.
Dumbledore spoke again. 'You'll be fine, Harry. Try not to focus on the vision itself, but on the source of the vision. It will be very hard as he most likely tried to hide his signature, and he made you think you were having a bonafide vision. But he must have left his signature somewhere. Relax, and focus, you will find it.'
Harry didn't know how much time had passed since he started looking for Voldemort's signature. Then, he felt a sharp stab of malice. 'Red!' A red lightning bolt formed before his eyes as he slumped in his chair, only to jump up again very quickly. As soon as he had spoken the word, what seemed like a bucket of icy water was thrown into his face. He immediately snapped out of the trance-like state, and looked at Dumbledore.
He was now standing across from Harry, eyes twinkling mischievously, with an empty bucket in his hands. 'There you have your alarm, Harry' he said, corners of his mouth twitching.
Harry didn't think it was so funny. He was wet, and very cold. 'What did you do that for?'
Dumbledore muttered something under his breath, and started drying Harry's clothes while explaining. 'I'm sorry, but I couldn't warn you about this. It wouldn't have worked. You see, that feeling of icy cold shock is something you will feel every time Voldemort might try to enter you mind. And he will not know that you know. The shock is associated with the colour red, which is what you gave his presence.'
Harry still wasn't too happy, but at least his clothes were almost dry again, and he was doing it for a good cause. He took a look at his new watch, and was startled to find out it was quarter to twelve. He quickly checked the other dial, and was relieved to see everyone was safe where they ought to be. Then he yawned and stood up from his chair.
'Harry, one more moment, if you don't mind,' said Dumbledore.
'What is it?' Harry said, a bit sharper than intended.
'For the last few weeks, the Order has been discussing what to do with you and your friends. Most of us feel that keeping you out of the loop is not safe anymore. After all, you have proved time and time again that if we won't tell you what's going on, you'll find out yourself. Am I right to assume that you are still doing that?
Harry nodded. He couldn't dare hope where this conversation was going.
'We feel it would be safer to let you in on more of what is going on. At least, we will know that you are getting the correct information. That's why we would like you, Ron, Hermione and Ginny, to sit in on Order meetings.
Harry's mouth dropped. 'Seriously? But what about Mrs Weasley?'
'Ah, yes, Molly. She is less than happy about this, but even she sees the necessity. She will, however, make you promise certain things. You may not act personally on anything you hear. You have to let the Order take action, if needed. Also, once school starts again, you will not be able to be part of the meetings. However, if anything of importance happens, you can trust to know of it as soon as the other members do. How does that sound?'
Harry's face broke into a smile. 'Good, that sounds good.' He was glad they wouldn't be treating them as kids anymore. Even Mrs Weasley seemed to be coming round.
'Now then, I think it is time for both of us to go to bed. If you could tell your friends of this decision, you will be welcome at the next meeting on the day after tomorrow.'
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A/N: Finally, the last introductory chapter. Woohoo! Let's get the party started!
I hope that you can understand now why I had to get rid of some storylines. Because this jumble of events is the edited version. Pfew! I've just got too many ideas in my head.
You will all be pleased to know that the writing for chapter 8 is already progressing quite nicely. Hopefully I will have finished it after this weekend. Now, I'd like to thank each and every one of my lovely reviewers. Also, if you leave your email with your review, and you say a bit more than 'Good/bad job, please update/stop writing' you can expect a personal reply. I'm more than happy to give motivations/explanations, and who knows, maybe even some spoilers!
NOTE: I know some people who will be glad that I have finally spell checked this monster. Sorry I didn't do it yesterday, but I was just so happy about having finished it.
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Ghosts from the past
The following morning, Harry woke up to an empty room once again. After getting dressed, he went down to the kitchen and to his surprise, found it to be empty too. Glancing at his new watch, he saw that it was only 7:30 am, and wondered what in the world would have caused such an early start for everyone, Ron in particular.
Although the plates had been cleared off the table, the rest of breakfast was still sitting on the table. As Harry decided to sit down and silence the rumbling sound in his stomach, Remus walked in. He was carrying a large book under his arm, and seemed in no way surprised to find only Harry at the table.
'Morning Remus, would you have any idea where everyone's gone off to?'
'Looks like they haven't filled you in on the new routine yet,' said Remus. 'Ron, Hermione and Ginny usually start working on the house around 7, and Molly has taken up some business for the Order during the mornings. The twins are at the Burrow, as usual during weekdays, and Arthur's at work.'
Harry could do nothing but stare at Remus, mouth agape. Surely he hadn't heard that right. Ron? Up and about at 7 during his holidays? Or during any day for that matter? It just didn't seem quite right.
'You might want to shut your mouth,' said Remus, 'you never know what might fly in, after all. It just goes to show that people can change, doesn't it?'
Harry nodded. 'Then I'd better hurry up and start helping them. Which room are they working on now?'
'They're working on my room, actually, so I've been banned to the guest room for the next couple of days. But if you wouldn't mind, Harry, I would like you to stay for a bit. I brought down your present with me.'
Harry had been wondering would give him that apparently required privacy.
Remus placed the book he had carried under his arm in front of Harry. Remus placed the book he had carried as he walked into the kitchen in front of Harry. It was a light colour blue, and read: 'Baby book: Memoirs of the expecting witch and new mum.' Harry looked at Remus as though he had gone mad. 'No offence, Remus, but somehow I don't think I'll be an expecting witch any time soon.'
Remus threw Harry a mock scowl. 'This isn't for you to write in, Harry. It's about you. It's your mum's pregnancy and baby journal. I knew she had kept one, but I always thought it had been destroyed. Somehow Sirius got hold of it, however, and managed to keep it for you all these years. There's even a note on it, addressed to Sirius, and instructing him to give this to you on your sixteenth birthday, in case anything would happen. Go on, open it.'
Remus gave the book a push in Harry direction. Harry felt both shocked and torn. He wondered why Sirius had never told him about this. He longed to know more of his mother and her thoughts, but on the other hand it felt wrong to read the journal. He didn't know that much about journals, but he did know that they were meant to be private. However, his mother had obviously wanted him to read it. Even though he thought reading it might make him feel like a voyeur, he decided to read it.
He opened the book to find what must be a photo of himself staring back at him. He looked awfully wrinkly and tiny in that photo. Beneath it were his name and birth details. Harry felt odd reading them. He had never known that his time of birth was 11:03 pm, or that he had weighed 7 pounds 2 ounces. One more time it struck him that there were so many little things he didn't know about. Mind, he had never really exerted himself at finding them out either, but it was still nice to know. On the next page, he found his mother's first entry.
iDear someone, I have decided to call you Spotty from now on, as you have yet to be born and named properly. Your dad is already referring to you as Jimmy Junior, well, not if I can help it! You have been growing inside me for 4 months now, and have finally stopped making me spew out my insides daily. So, thank you for that. It really is the strangest feeling, knowing that a new life is growing inside of you. Magic in its purest form, in my opinion. As we speak, your father is acting silly again. He reckons he can teach you spells before you are born. Says he's read somewhere that foetuses can subconsciously store information. So now, your father keeps tapping his wand on my tummy, apparently to 'wake you up'. When he's through with that, he'll teach you a new spell. So far, you have supposedly learned 'alohomora' and 'wingardium leviosa'. I do wonder what he'll teach you next. I don't even want to know what would happen if he taught you the Stunning spell, and you happened to be the first foetus to perform wandless magic. I'd probably be stunned permanently, ha! But all silliness on a stick. Silly as your dad is behaving, he's trying to be as involved in this as I am. He walks around with a pillow under his robes, even though I'm not even showing yet. I told him he'd have to change that pillow to a Bludger as the months progress, to add some weight. I've no doubt he'll do that too!/i
Harry continued leafing through the entries, until he remembered where he was. Looking up, he saw that Remus was still sitting across from him, watching him intently.
'Did you read it?' said Harry.
'I must admit I read some of it, yes. I know I probably shouldn't have, as it was obviously meant for you, but I couldn't help it. I discovered it only two weeks after the fight, two weeks after Sirius-,' Remus paused. 'Anyhow, I needed to know what it was before giving it to you. Do you understand?'
Harry nodded. He still felt extremely guilty for having had a hand in the loss of Remus' last old friend, and he would do anything in his power to make him feel better. He understood that Remus has read the book, because it was one of the last ties to his old friends, and he couldn't blame him for that.
Remus smiled. 'I'm glad. The note I mentioned is in the back, with the final entry. If anything will prove what a talented and special witch your mum was, that will.
Harry quickly sought out the last page. It was dated 30 October 1980.
iDearest Harry, You will have undoubtedly noticed the change of tone in my writing. Over the last year, we have been on an emotional rollercoaster. As I've told you so many times, you have been the light in our lives in the gravest of times. I have felt danger approaching for some time, but it's ever more urgent now. We have been in danger for years, but never like this. I fear for our lives. Something is approaching, and I do not know if your father and I will make it out alive. We love so much, Harry, and we would die for you. You're so precious to us, and though neither you now they realize it yet, to the rest of the world as well. There is so much we want you, no, we need you to know, which is the reason the nature of these entries has changed. Because we might not be around to instruct you, I'll have this diary to do it for us. I you are reading this without us present, then I am so, so sorry Harry. I hope the boys have done a great job bringing you up, but I fear things may happen that will prevent that. Please make sure you read this journal carefully, and know that we will always love you.
Love, mum.
Harry's eyes had gone misty and it took him some blinking, and a couple of deep breaths to regain his composure. Saving his questions till later, he turned his attention to the note to Sirius.
iDear Sirius, If you read this, something will have happened to James and I. Hopefully, Harry will be fine. He must be. Please take care of him for us. We have asked the same thing of Remus and peter. Tell him how much we love him, and how proud we are. Tell him we'll always be with him. Enclosed you will find my journal. It is imperative that Harry gets it, and reads it, but not before his sixteenth birthday. He might not understand, too many things could go wrong. Thank you for being our friend and fare well,
Love, Lily./i
After making sure his voice was steady, and he had pushed back the tears that had pushed against his eyes, Harry looked Remus in the eye. 'How did she know? She only wrote that entry the day before they were killed. She seems so sure, how could she have known? It reads like she knew this was her last entry. How did she know, Remus?'
'I wish I could tell you, Harry,' Remus sighed. 'That entry caught me by surprise as well. To me, the most baffling part is that she suspected we wouldn't be able to raise you.'
'No one ever told me you were supposed to.'
Remus looked unspeakably sad. 'We made a pact promising we would take care of each others loved ones should anything happen. By the time I heard of their deaths, Sirius had been sent to Azkaban, Peter was, for all we knew, dead, and you were well on your way to the Dursleys. Of course I would have tried to take care of you, but Dumbledore wouldn't even tell me where you were. I doubt I would have been any good anyway, I was a depressed drunk for the first years after Voldemort's fall, and I was never able to hold onto a job for long because of the whole werewolf-business.'
'How did Sirius get the journal?'
Remus shrugged. 'I wouldn't know. Your mum was quite the smart witch, probably as smart as Hermione, but I have never heard of a spell that would move an object to the care of a designated person in the event of the object's owner's death. Maybe she activated some sort of spell during the attack. Maybe Sirius found it in the debris.'
Remus walked around the table and hesitantly put his hand on Harry's shoulder. 'Are you okay?'
Harry nodded. Finally, he had something more than some photos and other people's memories. It was as though he had just received hundreds of letters from his mother, addressed solely to him.
'Your mother obviously placed a lot of importance in you reading this journal. Am I safe to assume you want to start straight away?'
Harry nodded again. 'I'll go up to my room if that's all right. Could you please tell the others that I'll join them as soon as I'm done?'
'Sure, don't rush it, Harry. I'll tell them, and I'll also ask them to leave you alone for a while. Alright?'
Harry smiled gratefully. 'Thanks for everything, Remus.'
He spent the next several hours poring over his mother's journal, reading all her descriptions of her pregnancy and everything that came with it. All entries were written in the same style as the first one, addressed to Spotty. She wrote about the times she felt him move for the first time, how her eating a piece of pumpkin pie would settle him down if he was keeping her up at night, about her expanding waistline, swollen ankles and all types of pregnancy ailments and quirks.
She also described the lengths to which James, Sirius, Remus and Wormtail went to make her laugh when she was feeling crabby. She wrote about the weekend they had all placed a bet on who would make the best pregnant woman. They had all transfigured their bellies to the size of Lily's, who was 8 months along, and had found it a lot harder than expected. Finally, Sirius had been proclaimed winner, after polishing of a bowl of gherkins with whipped cream, having at least 3 bathroom breaks during a meal, riding a bike without bumping his knees into his belly, and going the weekend without Butterbeer or Ogden's Finest. Harry laughed out loud at the mental picture of Sirius acting as a pregnant woman.
But the thing he liked best about the journal was that in almost every entry his mum wrote how much she loved him. Harry thought there must be some truth in all those people saying that you can never hear too many 'I love you's'.
However, a few months after his birth, the tone of the entries changed. An entry dated 12 April 1981 read:
iMy dearest Harry,
There are so many things happening right now. Voldemort's craving for blood seems to be growing by the day. And now we have found out who will have to defeat him. Your father and I are deeply distressed about the prophecy, as are Frank and Alice. You have undoubtedly heard about it by now. It is, after all, by all accounts your destiny. We will be with you every step of the way, whether you can see us or not. Because I feel great danger is coming in our direction, and I can only hope we will all be able to stay together. If not, then you might have no one to guide you. You're special, love. I knew that from the first time I laid eyes on you. You're special in ways you can't even begin to understand. Unless I'm very much mistaken, you'll have noticed some strange things happening by now. Don't fear it, Harry, and don't fight it. It is your destiny, and you will use your powers for good. We love you.
Love, Mum/i
There will several entries like this, all stressing that he was special, all foreseeing that strange things would happen, saying that 'it' was his destiny, that he shouldn't fear 'it', and that he should do research. What kind of research was also left unsaid.
Harry could only assume that his mother had somehow foreseen the unwanted Legilimency, or the way he had picked up his aunt's emotions. He just wondered why she had been so vague. Why, when she knew she would most likely die, didn't she write whatever it was she wanted him to know, instead of all this cryptic stuff?
His heart cried out to his mother, feeling so much closer to her after having read so many of her thoughts. His urge to speak to her was now greater than ever. As he turned the last page, a blinding flash of light came from the book, which wrapped the room in brightness. Then, as fast as it had come, the light died again.
As Harry opened his eyes, he saw that there was now a new page behind what he had thought was the last page. In it was a photo of his parents, somehow looking older, no, wiser; than they had looked in any other photo he had seen of them. His dad was waving enthusiastically as him mum was both smiling and crying at the same time, blowing him kisses. Harry could have sworn they could see him, and that they recognized him. As he softly touched his mother's face, writing in green ink appeared under the photo.
INever fear, Harry. We will always be there for you. We love you!
Mum & DadI
Harry snapped the book shut and sprinted downstairs, looking for Remus. He found him reading a book in the kitchen. Panting, Harry slapped the book on the table, in front of Remus, and pointed at the new page.
'Could you please tell me what in the world is going on? This page just appeared out of thin air, and that photo somehow looks different.'
Remus looked puzzled. 'It just appeared? True, I haven't seen that page before either, or that photo for that matter.' He looked lost in thought. 'I'm sorry, Harry, but I don't quite know what to make of it. It seems like Lily might have put some additional spells on it. She probably made it so that it only appeared when it was well and truly in your possession, or when you had read it all.'
Harry slumped in his chair. He knew that was the most likely explanation, but for a split second he had hoped that it might have been something more, although he didn't know what.
Remus looked at him carefully. 'So, how did it go? Found some answers?'
Harry shook his head. 'Just more questions, really. You wouldn't be able to tell me what this thing is my mum tells me not to be afraid of?'
'Unfortunately not. I read about that too. But now that we are on that subject, did you notice anything out of the ordinary happening?'
Harry denied that anything had happened, still not feeling sure about exactly what had happened. He thought his former professor looked slightly disappointed at hearing this, but the next moment he looked like nothing was wrong.
'Very well. Not to worry then,' said Remus. 'Dumbledore asked me to tell you he will be around for your Occlumency lesson later tonight.'
'Sure.' Harry didn't mind Occlumency that much anymore. He was glad that he didn't have to spend any more extra "quality time" with Snape, and his skills had been improving rapidly. He had even managed to keep Dumbledore from entering his mind while he was sleeping, although it had taken him 10 minutes to do so. 'I think I'll look up the others now.'
Harry walked into Remus' room only to find himself in the middle of a paint fight. Rollers and brushers were sailing through the room at high speed, and Ron, Hermione and Ginny were crouched behind a sheet-covered armchair, the bed, and a chest of drawers respectively.
He was grateful for his Seeker-reflexes as he heard Ginny cry out 'new target!', and he dropped to the floor. He heard several solid objects colliding with the door behind him. 'I give! I give!' he cried out, and looked up carefully. But even his reflexes couldn't save him from the inevitable attack as Ron dove on top of him, pinning him facedown to the ground, and Ginny started to paint his hair red.
He glanced up to see Hermione grinning down at him. Her hair looked very much like a bucket of paint had been dumped over it. 'Fighting is useless, Harry. They have decided to Weasleyfy us.'
'Which is a great honour, if you ask me,' Ginny replied. 'Besides, the world looks a lot more colourful once you join the Red Side. There, you're done!' Ginny dabbed a final spot of red on his nose.
'Ron! You can get off him now. I highly doubt that Harry is enjoying having you on his back. Unless, of course, you might be enjoying it?' Ginny added with a sly smile.
Ron jumped up faster than he would have had he been stung in the behind by a bee, exclaiming 'eeewww, eeewww', as the other were laughing.
Harry finally managed to take a look around the room and the sight wasn't too pretty. Harry's hair now matched 1 white wall and 3 brown walls that were covered in red blobs.
Hermione took one look at his face before she started defending herself. 'We were supposed to do two white walls, and two red walls with white squares in the middle. You know, to give it a bit of depth, and a seventies- feel. However, genius over here,' she nudged at Ron, 'though the walls might look better spotted. And so he started throwing our equipment around. As you can see – Oh! Honestly, Ron! Just leave it!' she exclaimed suddenly.
Harry sniggered as her looked over at Ron, who was now trying to make neat circles out of the blobs covering the walls.
Ginny, who had obviously gotten quite as efficient in spotting one of Ron's and Hermione's rows a mile away, quickly interrupted. 'Well, we won't be able to do anything about those walls now; the paint will have to dry first. I'll just go down and make us some sandwiches, shall I?'
As Ginny left for the kitchen, the others sat down on the sheet-covered floors.
'Ron?' Harry said. 'Have you figured out what you want to do about your NEWTs yet? Did you ask Snape if he would let you take Potions even with that E?'
'I asked all right, and he had the grandest time denying that request. No worries, though. I hadn't really expected him to let me take it anyway. I still haven't chosen my subject, though, and mum's having a right fit about it. She keeps reminding me that it can't be that hard to pick NEWTS out of 'only' 8 OWLs. She doesn't even care I got as much as Fred and George combined. I still can't believe I got one OWL more than you, Harry. It's amazing that I actually passed History of Magic. Of course, we can't all get perfect scores like our Hermione-' Ron stopped at the sight of Harry's face.
'I truly am glad for you, Ron,' said Harry, 'and I'm sorry you didn't get an O for Potions, but I'd greatly appreciate it if you never mentioned the History of Magic exam again.' It had taken him a lot of strength to say this in a quiet and composed voice. It wasn't that he wanted to put Ron down, but the memory of that day was still too painful. And not the least painful was the vision he'd had during that exam.
Ron's eyes grew wide as apprehension dawned on him. Hermione quickly intervened.
'Well, I for one don't know what I shall do. I'm afraid 12 NEWTs will not be a possibility, and I'm still thinking about what I want to do when we finish school.
'Let's just try to make it out of school alive, shall we?' said Harry grimly. He had decided this would be the time to discuss the prophecy with his friends.
They reacted not as shocked as Harry might have expected had he not spoken to Ginny, but not as optimistically as she had either. His heart sank as he saw the tears in Hermione's eyes, and Ron's white face, when he recited the prophecy. He couldn't help but be slightly surprised at their reaction. After Ginny's optimism, he had allowed himself a little bit of hope.
'Didn't you expect anything like this? I mean, Ginny said-,'
'You talked to Ginny about this before us?' Ron interrupted, but he quickly shut his mouth as Hermione pinched his arm.
'Well,' she said, evidently searching for words, 'yes, we expected something of this nature. But it's still quite a shock to actually hear the words, don't you agree?'
Harry couldn't agree more, and Hermione continued. 'However, as Ginny undoubtedly told you, a prophecy's only a prophecy. Besides, you know how I feel about Seeing and Divination. Lucky guesswork, if you ask me. I understand lots of prophecies come true, but there are some cases where the people involved found a way around them. And I say, that's what we will try to do.' Her voice was sounding much more determined now, and Ron nodded fiercely.
'We won't let you deal with You-Know-Who alone,' said Ron.
'Please, Ron!' Hermione exclaimed. 'We've been practicing for almost three weeks now. Just say it. Voldemort.'
'If you had the memories that I have, Hermione, you would think twice before saying that name.' Ron had a grave look on his face.
Harry felt deeply ashamed of himself. Since his arrival, he hadn't enquired once after his best friend's brainscarring.
'I'm so sorry, Ron. How are things going with those memories?' said Harry.
'It's going,' Ron said dully. 'They've tried to get them out, but it looks like that's not possible. I've found out who they belong too. They're mostly memories of Aurors, from You-Know-Who's heyday. I've even got some of Moody's memories in there. Apparently, Aurors were given the option to have some memories tapped into the brains, to dull the pain of what they'd seen. Apparently, the memories are only taken out for Auror-training, to prepare new recruits for what they might see.'
Harry could now stop wondering why Ron wasn't looking that dashing. If even Moody had used these brains, then those memories must be some of the worst in existence. Probably bad enough to give even the bravest person nightmares. And if there was one thing Harry could understand, it was nightmares.
'Silencing Charm?' he asked quietly, already suspecting the answer. Ron nodded. 'Yeah, I get a Dreamless Sleeping Potion once a week, but I'm not allowed to take it more often. Apparently, you need to dream to work through things that happen during the day. It's getting better, though. I have learned how to oppress the memories during the day. I just don't get a lot of sleep, that's all.'
'Well, same here, mate,' Harry couldn't help grinning slightly. 'Looks like we've both been putting Silencing Charms on our beds.'
A small sob to the left turned Harry's attention to Hermione. 'You too?' he asked, surprised.
Hermione nodded. 'I keep hearing Bellatrix Lestrange when I close my eyes. It's getting a bit better, but I fear we might have to get used to it. Who knows what other things we might see.'
Harry's heart went out to his friends. If it hadn't been for his stupidity, they wouldn't be having nightmares. The guilt welled up in him again.
Then a quiet voice spoke from across the room. Ginny had come in again, unnoticed, carrying a tray of sandwiches and 4 bottles of Butterbeer. 'Don't go there, Harry. We've been through this. We don't blame you for what happened, so neither should you. What's this anyway? Group therapy? Come on, let's eat.'
Harry hadn't noticed he was starving, but he wouldn't let her off the hook that easily. As Ron started stuffing his face with a turkey sandwich, and Hermione looked on in disgust, Harry pulled Ginny aside.
'How do you do that?' he said.
'Do what?' she asked innocently.
'Know what I'm thinking all the time.'
'Oh, Harry,' Ginny smiled, 'it's not really that hard. Your body language is extremely easy to read. When you want to be alone, you slouch slightly, and have this grave look on your face. When you're not telling the truth, your eyes dart all over the place and you rub the tip of your left foot with your right. When you're emotional, you focus on one spot like it's the most interesting thing in the world, and your breathing gets a bit heavier. And when you're feeling guilty you slouch, bite your lower lip, run your hands through your hair and get this absent look in your eyes.'
Harry wanted to argue with her, but after some consideration, he found that she was right.
'And now,' Ginny continued, 'you have come to the conclusion that I'm right, and you're thinking about how brilliant I am.'
'Almost,' Harry laughed. Then, he remembered something he had been meaning to ask her.
'Ginny?' he said tentatively. 'What happened between you and Dean?'
She tried to smile as she spoke. 'Him? Couldn't handle me not telling him where I was over the summer. Missed me too much, apparently.'
'Two can play this body language game, Gin. Come on, spill.'
Ginny started speaking very fast, as if she felt she might not be able to continue if she paused. 'I saw him, okay! We all saw him. We were allowed to go to Diagon Alley for 2 hours to get some ice cream, and he was at Florean's. He was snogging Maisy Catasin.'
'WHAT?' Harry exclaimed. Maisy Catasin? From Slytherin?!'
Ginny nodded. 'He sent me an owl the next day, about how he didn't like me being away all summer. Never mentioned her, of course.' Ginny was bright red in the face, but Harry could see that this time she wasn't blushing. She was very, very angry.
He decided to move away from the subject for the time being, as it obviously wasn't improving the collective mood in the room. He couldn't believe Dean was capable of something like that. How could he cheat on Ginny, with a Slytherin no less? Harry found it quite unbelievable.
As they were all quietly enjoying their lunch, something occurred to Harry.
'Ron? Tonks said you would be joining training. Why is that?'
'As I said, the brain has transferred mostly Auror-memories. Now I've got knowledge of several big fights between the Death Eaters and Aurors. I know what things work when fighting them, and what is just a waste of time. I've had lots of time to observe their strengths and weaknesses, without actually being in danger.'
'Awesome,' said Harry. 'I have a feeling we might be needing that kind of knowledge soon enough.'
Another couple of moments were passed in silence, until Hermione spoke. 'Harry, don't you want to know what Voldemort is up to?' She shot Ron an unreadable look as he shuddered at the name.
Harry shrugged. 'According to the Daily Prophet, he's not up to much. I've seen a couple of disappearances on the Muggle-news, but I didn't think any of them were Voldemort-related.'
'Oh, Harry,' Hermione exclaimed, exasperatedly. 'What will it take for you to stop believing anything the Daily Prophet reports? Honestly!' She started to turn red, but continued quietly as she sensed Harry's bewilderment.
'It does seem like most Muggle-disappearances aren't magic-related, but there are some coincidences. Did you hear about Mary Deary?'
Harry couldn't say he had. The name certainly didn't ring any bells.
'She disappeared two weeks ago, apparently left a note saying she'd gone on a last-minute holiday. Her family didn't trust it, and filed a missing person's report. But get this-.' Hermione paused, 'she's Dennis and Colin Creevey's ex-aunt. Apparently, she recently divorced their mother's brother.' 'But that's not all,' she continued quickly. 'Just last week, a boy disappeared. The police is treating is as a runaway case. Robbie O'Dwyer left to play football on Tuesday night, but never got to the field. And this Robbie is Seamus's second cousin.'
Harry tried to take all this news in. Here he had been, all this time thinking that Voldemort was keeping quiet, biding his time. How wrong he had been. 'How did you guys find all this stuff out? It's not like those family relations are really apparent.'
'Fred and George, mostly. They reckon that if it affects a Gryffindor, we have a right to know. We've tried to get some more information from them, but they're pretty tight-lipped. Say we'll know in due time, whatever that may mean. Anyhow, they say Voldemort's up to his old tricks again. Remember that the years of his rise were marked with disappearances? However, we're talking about Muggles now, and those disappearances were always directly related to the wizarding world. What would he want with distant relatives of Muggleborn or mixed blood wizards?' Hermione had said this all a couple of breaths, musing to herself.
The discussed Voldemort until it was time for tea. At 7:30, Dumbledore arrived, and Harry went to the study for Occlumency. The study hadn't been fixed up yet, but it had been made liveable.
Harry sat down at the desk, facing the ancient headmaster. Dumbledore smiled at him.
'So far, you have been making excellent progress, better than anyone could have expected. You have become excellent at warding me off during eye contact, and you are getting better in your sleep as well. Now, I would like to start with installing an alarm.'
'An alarm, sir?' Harry frowned.
'Yes, I believe that would be the best description. It's meant to detect another presence in your head, so that you can see the difference between true and false information.'
Harry was still frowning.
'I will explain further. Your connection with Voldemort works two ways. The first way is when you have entered his consciousness. The information you gathered at those times has proved to be both important and accurate. We will be studying this further at a later date. If you could control this, it would be of great value. It is for this reason that I have decided not to teach you to close down completely during your sleep. Not only would it be unwholesome, as it would stop dreaming at all, but it would also disconnect a possibly valuable connection. This has been a very hard decision for me to make, but with the right alarm, everything should work out fine. It is when Voldemort enters your mind that we have to be careful. Last time, he made it seem like what you were seeing in the vision was the truth, and you didn't feel his presence in your mind. Now, every Legilimens will leave a certain signature, a hint of an emotion. The stronger the Legilimens, the harder this signature is to detect. Are you still with me on this, Harry?'
'But I don't understand. Last year you wanted me to be able to repel all visions, even the useful ones. What's changed? I just have to let him go ahead with reading my mind?'
'No, Harry, not go ahead. This only goes for your sleep. It's all about being able to see the difference between what is true and what is false. And things have changed drastically. It is imperative we know what Voldemort is up to, and we don't always know. This method will not put you in any danger, in fact, it will make you safer, because you will know if a vision has been manipulated or not.'
'Well, let's do it then. What do I have to do?'
'It's quite easy, actually, but it will not be pleasant. In fact, it will be painful. Emotionally, not physically, that is.' Dumbledore looked across the desk, slightly uncertain. But Harry was ready.
'Let's go for it.'
'Remember the last time I entered your mind. Remember the sensation. Remember how you could tell it was I entering your mind, instead of another wizard. Now, find my signature, the recognition, and give it a colour. And stay focused.'
Harry strained his mind until he found the slight hint of serenity that accompanied Dumbledore entering his mind. It was hard to detect, but as he found it he said, 'purple'. A bolt of purple lightning flashed before his eyes.
'Very good,' Dumbledore went on. 'Now for Professor Snape. The last time he entered you mind he left his signature as well. Look for the emotion that accompanied his presence. It will be harder to detect than mine, so remain focused.'
Harry was having a hard time fining Snape's signature. Then, he felt a very slight hint of what felt like jealousy. 'Green.' A bolt of green lighting flashed before his eyes.
'Excellent, Harry, you're doing very well.' Dumbledore's voice sounded like it was coming from very far away. 'Now, please stay relaxed while I ask you to do the next thing. I need you to remember the last time Voldemort entered your mind.'
Harry could feel heart beating faster. That was one of the last things he wanted to focus on, to remember so clearly. It was the time he had had the fake vision of Sirius.
Dumbledore spoke again. 'You'll be fine, Harry. Try not to focus on the vision itself, but on the source of the vision. It will be very hard as he most likely tried to hide his signature, and he made you think you were having a bonafide vision. But he must have left his signature somewhere. Relax, and focus, you will find it.'
Harry didn't know how much time had passed since he started looking for Voldemort's signature. Then, he felt a sharp stab of malice. 'Red!' A red lightning bolt formed before his eyes as he slumped in his chair, only to jump up again very quickly. As soon as he had spoken the word, what seemed like a bucket of icy water was thrown into his face. He immediately snapped out of the trance-like state, and looked at Dumbledore.
He was now standing across from Harry, eyes twinkling mischievously, with an empty bucket in his hands. 'There you have your alarm, Harry' he said, corners of his mouth twitching.
Harry didn't think it was so funny. He was wet, and very cold. 'What did you do that for?'
Dumbledore muttered something under his breath, and started drying Harry's clothes while explaining. 'I'm sorry, but I couldn't warn you about this. It wouldn't have worked. You see, that feeling of icy cold shock is something you will feel every time Voldemort might try to enter you mind. And he will not know that you know. The shock is associated with the colour red, which is what you gave his presence.'
Harry still wasn't too happy, but at least his clothes were almost dry again, and he was doing it for a good cause. He took a look at his new watch, and was startled to find out it was quarter to twelve. He quickly checked the other dial, and was relieved to see everyone was safe where they ought to be. Then he yawned and stood up from his chair.
'Harry, one more moment, if you don't mind,' said Dumbledore.
'What is it?' Harry said, a bit sharper than intended.
'For the last few weeks, the Order has been discussing what to do with you and your friends. Most of us feel that keeping you out of the loop is not safe anymore. After all, you have proved time and time again that if we won't tell you what's going on, you'll find out yourself. Am I right to assume that you are still doing that?
Harry nodded. He couldn't dare hope where this conversation was going.
'We feel it would be safer to let you in on more of what is going on. At least, we will know that you are getting the correct information. That's why we would like you, Ron, Hermione and Ginny, to sit in on Order meetings.
Harry's mouth dropped. 'Seriously? But what about Mrs Weasley?'
'Ah, yes, Molly. She is less than happy about this, but even she sees the necessity. She will, however, make you promise certain things. You may not act personally on anything you hear. You have to let the Order take action, if needed. Also, once school starts again, you will not be able to be part of the meetings. However, if anything of importance happens, you can trust to know of it as soon as the other members do. How does that sound?'
Harry's face broke into a smile. 'Good, that sounds good.' He was glad they wouldn't be treating them as kids anymore. Even Mrs Weasley seemed to be coming round.
'Now then, I think it is time for both of us to go to bed. If you could tell your friends of this decision, you will be welcome at the next meeting on the day after tomorrow.'
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A/N: Finally, the last introductory chapter. Woohoo! Let's get the party started!
I hope that you can understand now why I had to get rid of some storylines. Because this jumble of events is the edited version. Pfew! I've just got too many ideas in my head.
You will all be pleased to know that the writing for chapter 8 is already progressing quite nicely. Hopefully I will have finished it after this weekend. Now, I'd like to thank each and every one of my lovely reviewers. Also, if you leave your email with your review, and you say a bit more than 'Good/bad job, please update/stop writing' you can expect a personal reply. I'm more than happy to give motivations/explanations, and who knows, maybe even some spoilers!