After the Veil
By Neurotica
Memories
Lupin and Sirius sat at the kitchen table of Number Twelve with a nearly empty bottle of Ogden's Firewhiskey between them and a shot glass beside it. A pile of silver sickles lay on the other side of the shot glass. Sirius clumsily reached out for a sickle, closed one eye to take aim, his tongue sticking slightly out, and bounced the sickle off the table, landing it cleanly in the shot glass.
"Drown your sorrows, Mister Moony," Sirius cried in triumph.
Lupin chuckled and reached out for the glass, his movements slow and just as clumsy as Sirius'. He brought the glass to his lips, tilted his head back to swallow the alcohol in one gulp, then slammed the glass on the table, a large grin on his face.
It was the first night in nearly two months that Lupin had off from his duties for the Order of the Phoenix. There hadn't been a meeting that night, and the two friends were taking advantage of the empty house to spend some much needed quality time together. It seemed to Lupin that whenever he arrived at the house, Sirius was in better spirits. He'd heard from other Order members that this was not the case when they'd visited; Sirius would see who had come in and immediately retreat upstairs to Buckbeak's room for hours on end.
Halloween was quickly approaching, but neither wizard would bring the topic to the surface. Lupin figured Sirius would talk if he needed to, and there was no reason to force him into issues that would undoubtedly depress him further than he had been since Harry's return to Hogwarts. He noticed his friend would zone out at certain moments and stare pensively at the floor or the glowing fireplace, but before he could say anything about it, Sirius would shake his head and crack a joke, turning the conversation in a complete different direction.
Lupin filled the shot glass again and reached out for a sickle. He made to aim for the glass, but found Sirius had once again zoned out. Slowly, Lupin sat the sickle down and watched his friend silently. Sirius' eyes grew darker and more hollow as the moments went on, leaving Lupin with no doubt as to what his friend was thinking about.
"Sirius," he said quietly.
Sirius jumped and snapped his head quickly back to Lupin. "Yeah?" he said with a smile that was obviously forced.
"Do you want to talk about them?" Lupin asked hesitantly.
For a moment, it seemed Sirius was finally going to crack and talk about Lily and James; he opened and closed his mouth a few times, each time with a heavy sigh. "There's nothing really to talk about," Sirius said slightly hoarse.
Lupin made to contradict the statement, but Sirius, once again, interrupted and changed the subject.
"So what do you think of my dear cousin Nymphy?" he asked with a grin that didn't reach his eyes.
Lupin sighed. It was never easy to talk to Sirius Black about certain subjects. Lupin had known that since the first month of Hogwarts when Sirius would never speak about his family. "She's just like you, Padfoot," he said, inwardly shaking his head at his best friend.
"I think she fancies you, you know," Sirius said, a real grin now in place on his face.
Lupin raised an eyebrow, forgetting the change of subject. "What?" he asked incredulously.
"Yeah," Sirius said. "Haven't you noticed the way she always wants to sit next to you in Order meetings? Or the way she acts when Dumbledore pairs you up for guard duty?"
Lupin's eyebrow rose so high it threatened to become part of his geaying hair. "No, I haven't noticed, Sirius," he said.
"Well, I have," Sirius said, as if that settled the matter. "She fancies you."
"Sirius, I'm old enough to be her father."
"Actually, no, you're not," Sirius countered. "She's twenty-four."
"And I'm thirty-seven," Lupin said flatly.
"So? Age doesn't matter when it comes to love, Moony," Sirius said wisely.
"Who said anything about love? You just said she fancies me, which I don't believe."
"You think I'm lying, then?"
"No, I think the firewhiskey has done permanent damage to that thing you call a brain."
"Do you fancy her?"
"What?" Lupin asked loudly.
"Do. you. fancy. Tonks?" Sirius asked as if talking to a two-year-old.
"No," Lupin said a bit too quickly. Sirius' grin widened. "What are you smiling about?"
"You fancy Tonks," Sirius began to sing. "You fancy Tonks. So, when's the wedding?"
"Padfoot, I'm going to hurt you. Badly," Lupin threatened.
Before Sirius could respond, the subject of their conversation, literally, came tumbling down the basement stairs. Lupin rushed over with grace he shouldn't have possessed after the amount of alcohol he'd consumed to where Tonks had tripped down the last two stairs and helped her to sit up.
"Bloody hell," Tonks muttered. "I can't go anywhere."
"Are you all right?" Lupin asked, examining the blue-haired witch with a concerned eye.
"Fine," Tonks sighed. "Nothing I haven't done before. Ow," she added, as Lupin wiped some dust from the knee of her torn jeans.
Lupin raised an eyebrow and pulled her pant leg up to examine the knee. A bruise was already beginning to form from where she'd fallen. He reached to his back pocket for his wand, tapped her knee lightly, ignoring her sharp intake of breath, and whispered a healing spell. "How's that?" he asked after a moment.
Tonks slowly tested out her knee. "Better," she said with a slightly surprised tone. "I need to remember that one." Lupin smiled and stood, sticking out a hand to help Tonks from the floor of the kitchen. "Thank you, Remus."
"You're quite welcome, Nymphadora."
"It's Tonks," she muttered halfheartedly, noticing her hand was still in Lupin's. They stood there in silent for a few moments, just watching one another's eyes. Lupin noticed that hers changed from dark blue to a silver color almost automatically. It was a very nice combination, Lupin caught himself thinking.
Before he could chastise himself for the thought, the loud clearing of a throat broke the eye contact. Lupin resisted the urge to groan as he remembered Sirius was still at the table. He reluctantly released Tonks' hand and turned to his friend, who just happened to have the world's most annoying knowing grin on his face.
Tonks, very red in her face, turned to Sirius as well. "Oh, were you guys playing Sickles?" she asked.
"Uh huh," Sirius said, still looking at Lupin. "Care to play with us, Tonks?"
"Actually, I'm going to turn in," Lupin said. "Early morning tomorrow."
"Right," Sirius said, still grinning.
Lupin rolled his eyes, smiled at Tonks, and went up the stairs. Best friends could be so infuriating sometimes…
That had been the first of many conversations between Sirius and Lupin about the young Auror. Lupin hadn't actually believed anything Sirius had said; he just thought his friend was trying to get under his skin as he had done numerous times during their Hogwarts days. Sirius and James never had much of a problem with girls, as Lupin recalled easily. Neither had he; he just preferred to approach relationships in his own way.
He'd dated a few girls in his younger days, though none of them turned out to be much of anything. The moment they found out about his Lycanthropy, they ran away screaming. One woman had actually thrown silverware at him after he'd told her. After that, he'd pretty much given up on relationships and devoted his time to studying the defense aspect of the Dark Arts.
He had to admit, even if it was only to himself, that there was something about Nymphadora Tonks that drew his attention. Their dinner that evening had been one of the first times in a week that Lupin felt better over what had happened. He caught himself enjoying himself, and even laughing a few times.
As he changed into his pajamas, though, Lupin began to feel guilty. It had been less than a week since he'd lost Sirius, and he was already starting to move on. He knew, deep down, that it would have to happen at some point, and that Sirius wouldn't want him to wallow in his depression for the rest of his natural life, but it didn't feel right. He was in the home of his best friend, having dinner with his cousin, and enjoying himself.
Sighing, Lupin thought about what Sirius would say if he knew he'd had dinner, alone, with Tonks. He'd probably make some comment about when the baby would be born and then if they were going to name it after him. Then Lupin would throw a book at him, hard, and change the subject.
Lying in bed, fighting the inevitable moment that he would fall asleep, Lupin began to wonder what a relationship with Tonks would be like. Spontaneous was only one word that came to mind before his eyes closed and his dreams took him to places he'd blush about when he was awake.