The Death of Professor Binns
By Moony
JKR owns everything you recognize.
Well, me and Paddy were talking about this, and so I decided to turn it into a humor, one-shot fic. –Moony
Professor Binns was tired. Dreadfully tired. Teaching students was a dull job, and his teaching was dull too. Every day, he read aloud from notes he found in the library. There was nothing to teach really. It was history. The boringest subject there had to be in Hogwarts. He had never enjoyed history himself. And he was stuck with the job. What could you possibly make interesting about history? History could only be taught with books, and that was the only way he taught.
Professor Binns, however, seemed even more exhausted than usual. It was probably old age. He was somewhere in his nineties now. He decided to settle down in the staff room, and have a drink, and eat a little bit. So he left the classroom, and headed for the staff room. With each step, his eyelids seemed to get heavier and heavier, and at last, when he reached the room, he fell into a chair and fell asleep.
The next morning, he found himself in the chair, and realized his first class would begin soon. Hurriedly he got up from his chair and ran to his classroom. He didn't seem to notice that he had become transparent, and he was gliding.
His class was already there and were giving him funny looks. Professor Binns shrugged it off. He probably did look odd after just waking up. He strode to the front of the room, where his notes had been from yesterday, and started reading where they had left off.
All of a sudden, he looked up, and someone's hand was waving in the air.
He looked at the person reproachfully. Dang – what was his name again? Sith, or Ith, or Mith… or something. Yes, yes, Mith, that was it.
"Mr. Mith?"
"Smith sir," the boy said. He gazed around the room, as if not daring to ask his question.
"Carry on Mr. Ith. We don't have much time."
"Smith sir. I was wondering… why are you all… silvery and transparent like? Like a ghost?"
"Nonsense. I'm not transparent and silvery!" Binns said.
Without examining himself, he looked at his notes and began to read again. When he reached out to the turn the page – he saw indeed he was transparent and silvery. And his hand went through the page!
Alarmed Binns tried to run, but intsead, he found he was gliding.
"Professor Binns… are you a ghost?" someone whispered.
Another brave soul ran up and stuck his hand through him. It wasn't the most pleasant feeling.
"Professor Binns… you're a ghost," the boy said.
"Impossible!" Binns cried. He ran back to the staff room, well glided, and there was his dead body.
Professor Binns was a ghost.