7. Hi Mom

Mido was biding his time, Link was sure of it. He'd been there almost two years, and yet he still hadn't done anything spectacularly humiliating or cruel to Link. Sheik had suggested that the guy had just forgotten about Link, but Link was waaaay too paranoid to consider that possibility.

So he watched and waited as Mido hung around with his little toadies, most of whom were taller than him, and pushed around the younger kids.

"You'd think someone would have noticed that he hasn't grown an inch by now," Link muttered. They were hanging out in the visiting room again, and Sheik was luckily in a forgiving mood, rather than his occasional bitch-mode.

"According to the records he's only like twelve. He could still pass for twelve."

"But they'll notice eventually!" Link looked at his friend. "Right?"

Sheik shrugged. "Maybe they'll think he's got one of those, uh, kidney diseases or something. You know, like that little actor dude."

"But then they'll call a doctor, right?"

"Sure, probably."

"And they'll figure out he's a Kokiri and send him to real jail!"

"Keep on dreaming buddy."

"I will thanks."

Sheik shivered suddenly.

"What's wrong?" Link asked.

"I don't know," Sheik frowned. "I just got this feeling like-" He stopped abruptly as a shadow fell across them.

"So," a voice said. "Here you are."

Without warning Sheik screamed and leapt onto Link's lap, clinging to him in fear. Link, startled, looked at the person who had scared Sheik so badly.

It was a woman, in her late thirties perhaps, very tall and muscular, with silver hair and red eyes. She was a Sheikah, and she was giving Sheik the most disapproving glare Link had ever seen.

"What are you doing here!" Sheik exclaimed, still clinging to Link.

"I finally managed to track you down," the woman said. "That was a foolish thing you did." She turned up the glare.

"It didn't work out so bad," Sheik defended himself. "This is as good a place as any."

"I do not believe I know any people who would agree with you," the woman sniffed. "Why did you break into a post office?"

"I couldn't let that letter reach my parents."

"So you broke into the post office!"

"You know what they would have done!"

Her expression softened slightly. "You did not have to run away. We could have worked something out."

"Worked what out, Impa?" Sheik snapped. "You didn't understand then and I doubt very much you do now. I'm much better off here."

Link couldn't take it any more, he had to interrupt. "Um, Sheik? I appreciate the affection but you're crushing me. Get off please?"

Sheik made a startled exclamation and scrambled off his friend. "Sorry Link, I didn't think."

"'S'okay." Link shifted in his seat as Sheik and the woman called Impa continued their conversation.

Impa glanced around, looked Link up and down, then leaned down close to Sheik. "Is he trustworthy?"

"Him?" Sheik looked at Link. "I'd trust him with my life."

Link beamed.

"But would you trust him with anything else?" Impa asked seriously.

"Of course." Sheik looked thoughtfully around the room. "But...not while I'm here."

Impa leaned in even closer. "I could get you out you know. All I would have to do is-"

"Impa!" Sheik snapped. Link was startled by the imperiousness of his tone, but it seemed to have the desired effect.

Impa stood up straight and looked chagrined. "Forgive me, you're right. I did not think."

"It's all right," Sheik said. "But you need to accept that I'm here to stay. I. Will. Be. Fine."

"You had better be."

"I am."

Impa pressed her lips together and glanced at Link.

"I'm not sending him away," Sheik said firmly.

"But-"

"No."

Impa sighed. "Yes you- uh, Sheik."

Sheik sniffed.

"You know," Link said nervously. "I can leave, if you guys need to talk."

"You don't have to," Sheik said softly.

Link looked at him, suddenly overwhelmed with fondness. "No, it's okay. If you need to be alone..."

"So I'll see you later?" The question seemed very important to Sheik.

"Yeah, yeah of course."

"'Kay."

Rather reluctantly, Link left.

He flopped down on a couch in the common room. A moment later a small boy came up and leaned on the back of the couch, staring at him.

"Heya Skull Kid," Link said.

"Heya," Skull Kid said. Sheik had come up with any number of good nicknames for the boy, but he still insisted on being known only at "Skull Kid."

"Why you staring at me Skull Kid?" Link asked.

"'Cause."

"'Cause why?"

Skull Kid was silent for a long moment. "Will you teach me to be like you?"

Link stared back at the small boy. "Why would you want to be like me?"

"'Cause you're cool."

Link laughed wryly. "I am not cool."

"Sure you are. You stick up for the little guys like me." This was true. For the last few years Link had made a habit of keeping the older boys from picking on the younger ones. It got easier as he got older, and now, at fifteen, it was almost too easy.

"So? I'm sure lots of people would do that."

"Not in here. People are mean in here."

"What did you do Skull Kid?"

"Huh?"

"To get in juvie, what did you do?"

Skull Kid shrugged. "I stole some stuff. And I knew it was bad, so they found me guilty."

"You're what, seven?"

"Eight."

"So you must have stolen a lot to get in here for any time at all."

"I stole...um...a horse, and all the stuff on the horse, and some money, and, um, some toys, and..."

"Okay, I get the idea. You're a klepto."

"A what?"

"It means you can't stop stealing."

"Sure I can."

"Give me my hat back."

"Oh...you noticed that huh?"

"Yeah. Now give."

"Sorry sir."

"Don't call me sir. It's terrifying."

zzz

Link didn't see Sheik again until the were out on highway cleaning duty that afternoon. As luck would have it they were actually beside each other for once, and Link couldn't have been happier. He managed to hide it well though.

"So who was that woman and why were you so scared of her?" he asked

Sheik sighed. "That was Impa, she's, uh, kind of my mom."

"Kind of?"

"She raised me, but she's not my real mom."

"I see... And the reason you were so scared of her?"

Sheik grinned sheepishly. "She's the one who taught me how to fight."

"Yikes."

"No kidding."

"She was kinda hot though."

Sheik stared at him in horror.

"For a mom I mean!"

Sheik kept right on staring.

"I mean, um, if she wasn't like your mom I...I..."

Sheik began to slowly back away.

"You suck."

"No, I don't."

"And that's why you suck."

There was a long pause while both boys though about all possible interpretations of Link's statement.

"Um, th- that's not what I..."

"Yeah. Yeah, okay. I know."

Link gulped hard. Don't think of it, don't think of it, don't think of it... Dammit! Okay, I'm not turned on, I'm not turned on, I'm not turned on... God I hate being a teenager.

zzz

"The fact that you, my sister, and that chick Bonanza are the only girls I have seen in person in five years is pretty much the worst part of this whole deal!" Link raged to Ruto, the Zora girl.

"Well it's not like there's much I can do about it," Ruto hmphed. "Most of my friends are Zoras, and I doubt very much that my telling them you're horny as hell is going to encourage them to volunteer."

"Good point..." Link slumped back in his chair. "But you know the worst part?"

"Hm?"

"Sheik's got that little hoe waiting for him as soon as he gets out! I keep thinking of how Sheik will lose his virginity before I will, and that he knows exactly when!"

"So you keep thinking of Sheik having sex?"

"Yes! I mean it's like it's stuck in my brain! I...can't..." Link looked at Ruto sharply. She was grinning. "That's not what I meant!"

Ruto laughed. "I know, I know, but it's so much fun to make fun of you. And you're so cute when you blush!"

"I'm not blushing!" Link exclaimed, blushing furiously.

"To be fair, I can understand why you'd think about it."

"Huh?"

"Sheik is very pretty. With that hair of his, and those eyes. And he's fairly short."

"Yeah, it's weird. A couple years ago he was taller than everyone, but now he's almost stopped growing. And he's only 5' 6"!"

"Hm, weird. That's kinda short even for a girl."

"Yeah..." Link trailed off and stared into space.

"You're think about Sheik as a girl, aren't you?" Ruto asked knowingly.

"What! No!"

"Ah, your voice says 'No,' but your crotch says 'Dear god, yes!'"

Link grabbed a pillow and put it in his lap, blushing again. "Sometimes I really hate you Ruto."

"And yet you keep telling me all this personal stuff. Either you're a glutton for punishment or you really need a journal."

"A...journal?"

"Yeah. Somewhere to write all your most personal thoughts and feelings, where you can sort out all your conflicting emotions and figure out what the hell is going on in your head."

"Well, that would be nice... Especially since I seem to be sorely lacking a shoulder angel and devil."

"Most people are," Ruto said sagely. "So you want me to bring you one?"

"Yes please. With a lock. A big one."

"No prob."

zzz

Link's Journal, Entry 1

So here I am, writing in a journal. It feels sort of girly, but I suppose if it helps me figure out what the hell is going with me it's okay.

Sheik's my best friend, and he has been for five years now. Ever since the day I met him we've been inseparable, and I like it that way. I really don't know what I would do if I lost him; the very idea is frightening. I guess in a lot of ways he's like my brother, but for some reason I don't like to think of him that way.

Maybe it's because we're more like two parts of the same whole, or something like that.

God, I really dosound like a girl.