Lyrics from Linkin Park "my December"

:And I'd give it all away

Just to have somewhere

To go to

Give it all away

To have someone

To come home to:

Buffy's POV

Faith looks tired, and bored when I step into the lab. I'm halfway to her before she notices me. As she lifts her head I catch a glimpse of her, laid out in a hospital bed, tubes connected to her arms..

I blink and she's smiling up at me. She takes my hand and pulls it to her lips, kissing my palm gently. I sink into the chair next to her.

"Hey," I smile, "what's the diagnosis?"

"No word yet, the doctors are keeping mum. They wanted to wait for you and the big man to get here." She frowns looking the way I came. "Where is sir mcbeefalot?" I smirk at her.

"Angel, is going to be right," I hear the elevator ding. "Here." I glance over and see Angel striding toward us, his leg already healed.

"What have we figured out?" He asked before he had reached us. "Alissa!"

"Right here," she came running. "And here are the results." He snatched them from her.

"Jiya? She's a good guy though. Works for the powers."

"The spell was meant to be good. It must have been the exact wish, or the circumstance. The only way to know for sure is to call on Jiya." Alissa explained.

"So, what's going on?" Faith asked, looking at me for an explanation.

"That was all jibberish to me," I shrugged, looking to Angel or Willow for a more in depth explanation.

"Jiya, she grants one wish to people the powers that be deem worthy. Usually they earn it after being put through unearned trials." Willow explained.

"I was never granted a wish," Faith stands, giving us all the 'you're crazy' look.

"Your memory would be totally reformated," Alissa answered without looking up from her clipboard, where she was now scribbling wildly. "I can summon Jiya to the green room if you want, sir."

"Yeah, get Faith in there," he waved Alissa away. "Buffy, we need to plan."

"I want to stay with Faith until she goes in," I told him. He gave me a look, holding my eyes for a beat before nodding.

"Right, Willow come with me. Buffy you'll join us?"

"As soon as she goes in," I nod.

"Alright."

Faith and I watched as Angel and Willow walked away. She kept looking their way after the door was closed behind them, I reached out, taking her hand and she looked down at me.

"Am I crazy?" She asked.

"No," I assured her. "Something happened, and bad things are going to keep happening until we figure this out." I stand, wrapping my arms around her. She's tense for a moment, then wraps her arms around me, leaning her head on mine. I never realized how much taller than me she is.

"I am so scared, B," she sounds scared. "This is not my life. My life is friends and family, and working. It's not this crazyness."

"Yeah, that's my life?" I laugh a little, pulling back to look her in the eyes. "If I didn't know the spell had been put on you I would assume this was all my fault." Now she laughs a little, and I push hair

out of her face. She kisses me gently.

"I love you," she whispers, moving her lips to my cheek. "I don't know why, but I do. I feel like I've loved you forever."

"I know," I answer her, moving my hand to the back of her head, keeping her against me. "I love you too. And when all this is over we'll be happy, I swear." She nods against me, and I feel her tears on my cheek.

"Hey," I push her back so I can see, she wipes her eyes, sucking in a deep breath. "It's alright."

"Be careful, if you go after him, please be careful."

"Oh, we're going after Spike," I nod, "you can bank that."

"You say he's crazy."

"Yeah, but I'm stronger and smarter than him. And I have you to come back to. Just figure this out with Jiya."

"I will," she smiles. "Be sure to come back."

"I promise," I kiss her now, holding her close enough to feel her temperture rise when I run my hands down her back.

"Faith," Alissa interupts us, and Faith pulls back, licking her lips. She moves her hand to my cheek, running a thumb over my lips as she pulls away. She nods, and I nod. We walk away from eachother, I don't look back, and I know she doesn't either.

Faith's POV

I step into the green room, door sliding immediatly shut behind me, locking into place so that when I turn around I can't see where the door was. I look around the room, somewhat surprised to see its white. Although why I find that contradiction surpriseing I don't know. Suddenly all the lights go off, and the room is filled with a light breeze.

I can't explain it, but it smells green, like fresh cut grass. There's also a sort of salty smell. I'm immediatly taken back to summer trips to my grandparents at the ocean. Suddenly I'm tired, worse than ever before. I lay down on a floor, not as hard as I would have expected, and close my eyes.

When I open them soft sunlight is falling on me, a sort of late summer sun, not intense, but strong in its own way. I sit up, finding myself in a field, wind blowing over me. I can hear the surf crashing, and when I stand, I see it past the ledge below me.

"Faith," I turn to see a beautiful woman behind me, all billowing dress, and grace. Her skin seems a little green, blonde hair and pink streaks. She is fucking gorgeous.

"Jiya?" I make it a question, but I know the answer. She seems to glide forward, placing a hand on my cheek.

"It wasn't supposed to be this way. You weren't supposed to be hurt, you weren't supposed to meet her."

"Buffy?" Again I know the answer.

"She was something you were supposed to leave behind, meeting her has thrown off everything. You can stay with her, but it comes at a cost."

"So I can't be with her?" I frown, "She's the best thing that's ever happened to me."

"That's true, and it's also not."

"Well, what was it like before?" I asked.

"I can't tell you that."

"Why not?" I asked again, getting more agitated.

"Because now you have a decision to make. To continue on this way, having this life with Buffy, which will be idealic, I promise. But it will come at the expense of every other part of your life. You can choose to walk away from her right now, and go back to your normal life. Or you can choose to go back."

"Back? Back to what apparently was so bad I gave it up without a second thought?" I realized right then that all my doubts were gone.

"It's your choice, when you've made it, I will come" she whispered, backing away, and dissapearing into the haze that was forming.

Slowly, everything faded to white, and I stood alone in the green room once again. The door slid open and I walked back into the lab.

"Well?" Alissa asked eagerly.

"Where's Buffy?"

"Left over an hour ago, why?"

"Over an hour? How long was I in there?"

"Four hours and," Alissa checked her notes, always thurough. "And eighteen minutes."

"I gotta go home," I started out of the lab.

"Wait, Faith, we need to know what she told you, so we know what to do" Alissa tried to step in front of me, I pushed past her.

"No you don't. Its my decision," I left the lab, taking the stairs two at a time, until I reached the level marked parking.

I don't remember much of the drive home, if there was traffic I didn't notice. I glanced at the clock when I stepped into the house, and it dimly registered it was after nine.

I fixed a sandwhich and ate it mechanically. No I'm not sure what was on it. I lost an hour in the kitchen, when I looked at the clock on the microwave it was after ten.

How long had Buffy been gone? Three hours maybe? I found myself wondering if she was even alive anymore as I climbed the stairs to my room. I walked quickly to the balcony, climbing up onto the only ledge big enough to sit on. For a couple minutes I stare over the city clearing all the confused thoughts from my head.

Give up Buffy, the idea of it felt strange, even though I had only known her a short while. She felt like the missing piece in my puzzle, the one thing my life had been lacking. And now I had to choose. Loose her forever, or loose everything in my life for her. Walk away from her here, or go back to my old life, whatever that was.