FYI, the Hmong name is pronounced "koo gawng." The 1st g is a soft g like in "beige" or "rouge." The rest of the word rhymes with "song." And why haven't we seen any Asian-American SGC soldiers, anyway?
Lots of notes at end (they were needed).
The gate technician's face filled the screen. Emmett fast-forwarded it, impatient. He hit play again during the few moments of blank space they always left between interviews, ensuring that neither would be cut off, and then the camera was slowly panning around the half lit room by the stairwell. It passed over Wells, his breathing ragged, and Bosworth leaning over him, their faces obscured by shadow. As the camera turned towards Balinsky for the first interview, Emmett started fast-forwarding again.
He watched Daniel and Janet go in and out, never pausing, and as the stretcher bearing Wells disappeared from view he hit "play" again. The men remaining in the room were silent, though Emmett could see Wickenhouse on the left side of the screen keep glancing at the blood on the floor.
And then Dixon's radio had crackled to life. The words were mostly unintelligible, like Wickenhouse had said, but it was Daniel's voice and he sounded frantic. Another voice came on, saying clearly, "Understood, we have your position and we're on our way."
Emmett hit pause and turned to James. "Enhance that. I want to know what he said."
"Yes Sir."
And a short while later Daniel's words came clearly from the speakers, a continuous frightened sentence: "I need a medic Frasier's been hit I need a medic! Sierra Gulf Niner… aghh I need a medic!"
He'd been guessing it would be something like that, but it was a shock all the same. Wells, O'Neill, and Frasier too? He knew that Wells had a good chance of recovery, but what of the others? With a sudden start, Emmett remembered their liaison, Colonel Rondell, and added another name to the mental list. Then, needing to distract himself, he got to work.
When a clean-shaven Asian-American man arrived during work the next day and introduced himself as "Major Kou Xiong. I'll be your liaison for the remainder of your stay," Emmett knew the fate of Rondell. It wasn't really a shock, but Emmett still felt a sudden kind of grief, which he pushed aside to be dealt with later.
"Casualties from the attack?" he asked. When the other man hesitated, Emmett said, "Please, don't block me on this. We were there, and we need to know."
Xiong nodded, his expression understanding but grave, and Emmett's fear grew. "There were a number of injuries, those of Major Wells, Sergeant Harriman and Colonel O'Neill being the most severe, but they'll be alright. There were two fatalities, Colonel Rondell and Major Doctor Frasier."
He'd told himself that was a possibility, but he hadn't wanted to believe it. Emmett looked at the stricken faces of his crew and realized with a shiver that he'd talked to both Rondell and Janet…Frasier—he stumbled over how to think of her—just before their deaths.
"How?" he managed to croak.
In answer Xiong held up a small tape. "This is from the security monitor in the hallway. I can't promise you'll be able to use it in your film, but I thought it would show what happened better than I could explain."
There was no sound and the lighting was terrible. Janet ran into the shot from the lower left, cast into shades of black and white by the low-quality film. She paused near a corner and cautiously looked ahead, gun first. Then she jerked abruptly backward almost like she'd been pulled from behind by an invisible rope. From the angle and the lack of color Emmett couldn't see any blood, just a small figure that looked like an abandoned doll, but only for a moment.
Because then Daniel was running forward, shouting something although Emmett couldn't hear the words. He pulled Janet away from the corner and held his gun awkwardly in one hand as he fumbled for her pulse. He put his hand over her heart, then grimaced and pulled off his glasses, putting them slightly above her open mouth. He was looking to see if they were fogged by a faint breath, Emmett realized. After a moment Daniel flung the glass onto the floor and swiped at his eyes, his anguish palpable in the grainy picture. The feed from the camera ended suddenly and the picture on the television dissolved into snow.
Xiong stopped the tape but the silence stretched on until Emmett managed, "That tape needs to be in the documentary." When Wickenhouse and James turned scandalized eyes on him, he said, "We're trying to show the audience what the SGC is all about. Before… this… happened, I thought that SG-1 was how to do that. But now… the way to show the character of the SGC and of its people, and even their mission itself, is to tell Janet's story."
He looked seriously at the others. "We're going to have to do this very, very carefully. Let's not try to do any set interview times or approach anyone whose emotions are right at the surface. We'll also have to tape the memorial service, but the key words to remember are going to be quiet, unobtrusive. At times like this, stories worth telling will come at us from all sides, and we need to be in a position to hear them without causing offense." Turning to Xiong, he asked, "When will we be allowed back into the base?"
The next day, they went to Hammond's office first, and the slight feeling of deja vu caused by the similarities to the first day were crushed by the all-too-real differences. Emmett had to lay out his plan to the general and show him what they had so far. Hammond's face was hard and angry and Emmett was stunned when he was given the go-ahead.
He talked to the nurses and other infirmary staff. He talked to Wells again, and Harriman, who had crouched under his desk as the explosion began, a single but solid wall of steel between him and the center of the blast. Harriman described how he'd been trapped by debris into that small pocket and his fight to free himself. "I knew until I could close the iris they would keep coming," he said. "I didn't even have time to think about how little air was in there, I just heard all the weapons being fired and thought of how many Jaffa could come through before the 'gate shut down automatically in 38 minutes."
Emmett avoided SG-1, knowing that they were especially close to Janet, although once he did catch a glimpse of Daniel in a private infirmary room, hands resting lightly on the empty bed. Emmett thought he saw the glint of a tear, but kept on walking. There would be time for SG-1 later, when the grief was a little more distant.
The memorial was public, at Janet's burial, so Emmett knew nothing classified would be said. He was told it was public so Janet's friends outside the military could come. And come they did, pouring into the cemetary. A few stopped by the camera set-up to ask why he was there, and he learned who a few of them were; a school teacher of Janet's daughter, Janet's ex mother-in-law, a civilian doctor Janet had often corresponded with. Then there was the crowd of high school students, surrounding a slight girl with brown hair. Emmett realized she had to be Janet's daughter.
Several people spoke, some from the SGC and some not, and Major Carter gave the eulogy. "Everyone here knows that Janet Frasier was… an extraordinary human being. I cannot add to what has already been so eloquently said here today. For those of you who knew her outside her job, know that although the details of her death are classified, she was not killed in a freak accident or by friendly fire. She died doing her job. She died saving lives."
Sam shuffled her notes. "I could not find the words to pay Janet the tribute she is due. But thanks to a suggestion from another of Janet's friends, I realized that while words may not be enough, there are some names that might do. We often talk about those who give their lives in the service of their country, and while Janet Frasier did just that, that's not what her life was about. The following are the names of the men and women who did not die in the service, but who are in fact alive today because of Janet." Sam began the list with her own name, and laid an iris on the coffin before continuing.
With each name, more people came forward with irises, until the brown of the coffin was obscured by a violet carpet. Everyone was crying—Sam, Emmett—everyone. Later, in the editing room, Emmett would fade Sam's voice after the first few names, and show the irises being laid down while on voiceover the audience heard the ancient ballad Daniel had recited, a song Janet had loved and which Daniel had introduced to her. He spoke the words in both the original Arabic and in English, alternating every line.
Baktoub ismac yah habibi ay louhe il adeem. One iris. I write your name in stone.
Btouktoub ismie yah habibi ay ramul it tarig. Another iris. You write my name in the sand on the road.
Ohh bukra bit shatie dinie ya jourouh il fatahha. And another. Tomorrow the rain will fall on all the opened wounds.
Ohh bithel ismac yah habibi ohh ismie byinmahha. And another. Your name will remain, but mine will disappear.
For now though, Emmett's mind was far from the editing room, and he sat heavily on the grass next to the rest of his crew, glad they had a tripod for the camera, because at the moment none of them would be able to hold it steady. He watched the coffin lower and the twenty-one gun salute. The crowd slowly started to disperse.
Emmet was lost in his thoughts, remembering his wife's funeral as well as his brief memories of Janet, when he realized that someone had stopped in front of him. Looking up, he saw the girl—young woman—he had noticed earlier. Janet's daughter. He had sent her a message through General Hammond, giving her his condolences, though he knew how little they would mean, but also informing her that he would not air any of the segment about Janet without her permission.
Her cheeks were streaked with tears, but she was composed and although Emmett knew she was adopted, he could see some of her mother's grace. He got to his feet and shook the hand she offered, saying, "I'm Emmett Bregman," uncertain what she wanted.
"I'm Cassie Frasier. I want to talk to you."
Notes: At this point you may be thinking, "I thought this was supposed to be a fix-it. Why didn't it "fix" the most horrible thing about this episode?" Well, that's a very valid question.
The answer is that even though I was terribly upset TPTB decided to kill Janet, from a storytelling perspective I could see why they did, and I anticipated an incredibly powerful story. But I was disappointed by the episode as aired.
The biggest thing that bothered me was this: if they were serious about showing the sacrifice of soldiers, why did they spend practically the whole episode trying to convince us that Jack was the one who had died? I consider the way they hinted at that to be a very cheap trick that fooled only a few people the first time they saw it, and of course no other time. IMO this episode should have been about Janet in the way that say, Meridian was about Daniel (a sad ep. A powerful ep). Heroes was powerful too, but the side-story with that bean-counter guy really distracted from Janet's story, I think. And what's with the solitary reference to Cassie?
So basically, this fic is my way of trying to work the story so it still is the story of Emmett's film, and of Janet's death, but without the plot holes that plagued the version that aired. I almost changed my mind when I got to writing this chapter though-it was incredibly hard to write Janet's death.
The song Daniel recites is from a book called "Honor Lost" about honor killings in Jordon. It's a very, very, very sad book.
Writing this chapter it also occurred to me: Why do they have so many ceremonies/memorials in the 'gate room? What if there was an unscheduled activation?
I'd like to hear how you reacted to this one, and that includes constructive criticism/explaining what (if anything) you had a problem with. But no flames please.
There will probably be one or two more chapters. My goal is to finish this story by the end of the weekend, because I'm going overseas on Monday. I think I can, I think I can…