Certain people touch your heart and you can't stop thinking about them...

That's the kind of person you are...

Absent yet so near...

Simple yet worth caring for...

Part Eight:

Decision for One's Fate

"W-What makes you think that?" she blurted out.

I just stared and didn't make any move. Well? What if it was really like that? What if Sakura didn't tell her about my illness? Would she still be coming back and be willing to stay and take care of me?

I don't get this.

Yes, you're right. Even a so-called genius like me couldn't figure it all out.

She looked away from me with a sad expression that had never left her face ever since I saw her this morning. She shows it off too much that I almost know what goes on inside her head.

Guilt.

Regret.

Lament.

Anger.

Yup. That's it.

"No... You're definitely wrong, Shika..." she finally broke the silence and looked back at me. "I...I've got to admit. You're always in my mind lately that one time I even got a lump on my forehead because I banged my head against the wall just to get you out of my head. And yes... I know I'm stupid, I know I'm troublesome and I know that I'm such a cold-hearted jackass..."

She kept on talking as her words unexpectedly remained echoing inside the walls of my mind.

You're always in my mind lately...

Oh come on... She's just saying this to lighten up my mood and because she knows that I won't be here for too long. I bet that after I found myself lying inside a casket, she would eat it all back.

That's just it. Nothing more.

"Ino... if you're just saying this to make me feel somewhat happy, forget it. I won't play this game anymore. I'm sick of waiting, I'm sick of hoping and I'm sick of being left out. When mom left us, I was left out. When dad and Chouji died, I was left out. And you know what had hurt me most?"

I closed my eyes and lowered my head not wanting to see her crying face again. "When I realized that I couldn't be the guy that could give you all the love you want because I'm not Sasuke. I'm not cool, I'm not handsome and I'm not the one right there inside your heart and would never be..."

I'm not asking her to be with me forever.

I'm not forcing her to love me back and I'm not saying that she should treat me as her husband since we were married—by force.

I just... want to be with her for the last moment of my life. That's why I did all those craps, right?

I felt her hand on top of mine and that made me open up my eyes. But I fought the urge to hold her back because I'm afraid to be rejected and abandoned again.

"I already know that, Shika. You're not that cool and you're not that handsome. Still... you have something that Sasuke didn't have which I think was the thing that made me change myself as well as my feelings..."

Now what is she talking about?

Feeling her arms around me made me feel contented in some way. I didn't ask for this and I didn't expect this.

I didn't even think for a second that life for me would be this good.

"I think... it's the closeness that we've shared that made you different to him..."

Closeness?

Have we... become close?

"Ever since we were still genins, I've been already blind for not seeing this." She pulled me closer as if I was a stuff toy to cry on. "When... Sakura and I had a fight; you were there to cheer me up. When Chouji died, you tend my wounded soul even though you were wounded too. And me?"

Again, I heard her cry.

"I've been unfair, haven't I?"

I never thought that she would admit it. Being the Ino I've always known, she wouldn't be like this.

And I, would never be like this if it wasn't for her. Maybe... my infamous goal would never be changed if I haven't met her. If I haven't loved her, rather.

I want to be a so-so ninja, have an ok salary, have a wife neither a beauty nor a hag, have two children, one boy, one girl, retire when the daughter is married and the son could support himself, play Shougi and Go living an easy and relaxed retired life, die of old age and hope to kick the bucket before my wife.

That should be it. But with Ino here...

I'm certainly NOT a so-so ninja. I do NOT have JUST an ok salary and I have a wife that is TRULY a beauty and definitely NOT a hag.

"Would you ever forgive me, Shika...?"

Who am I to bear anger to a woman like her?

Just a stupid troublesome idiot that wants to keep my goddamn instincts inside my baffled head, I guess...

"Of course, I would." I said simply and pulled away. "But not now. Definitely not now..."

I could only see nothing but pure sadness in her eyes as she left the room.

I stood up from my bed because I'm so sick of this crippled-like behavior of mine. I hate it when I feel weak especially right now that I have this shit.

If you know what 'shit' I'm talking about...

Opening the drawer, I took a pack of cigarette and lit it. Pretty idiotic, I know. It's a general fact that smoking is DEFINITELY and TOTALLY not for sick people.

Like heck I care.

I just... want to die.

And if Kami-sama permits it, three weeks would definitely be the longest moment of my life...

How troublesome...

"Sayonara, Ino! We'll see you some other time, neh?" I heard Tenten's voice coming from the outside of the window.

I set aside the curtains and looked down the grounds only surprised to see the girls saying farewell to Ino. Wait... isn't Ino supposed to leave with them?

"Aa... I'll be back in Konoha together with Shika-kun." I heard Ino reply.

Me? With her? Back in Konoha?

Now isn't that the stupidest thing I've ever heard?

"Take care of Shikamaru-kun now, will you?" Sakura said and gave a friendly hug to her best friend before leaving.

"Pease send Shikamaru-kun our regards. We'll be looking forward to see him back in good health." Hinata added.

I stared at her as she waved good-bye to her friends. I didn't expect this. Why? Why is she doing this? Didn't I tell her to leave? Didn't I tell her all the horrible things that could make her hand landing hard on my face?

I sighed—deeply.

Why can't she just go damn it?!!!

I saw Tenten whispering something to her and to my surprise; she looked up towards my direction.

I could see her face turn crimson red followed by her friends' laughter. Need to tell you this?

She looks cute. Just as always...

I heard the others bid their final remarks as they disappeared from my view. So there we were, still staring at each other totally aware of the redness of our faces.

"Shika-kun! You're hungry now, are you? Wait! I'm going there!" she exclaimed cheerfully and flashed me an oh-so-sweet smile.

Of all the surprising things in the world...

I can't help but smile, too. Even if the world turns upside-down or if ever the crow turns white, she's still the woman I loved. No, erase that.

She's still the woman I love and would always do...

And I can't help but remember the times I've spent with her because it's just like a precious jewel locked up inside my own treasure chest—my fragile heart, that is.

"Shika-kun!!!! You're a cheater!!!!" Ino exclaimed sticking out her tongue at me.

I sighed and lay my head on the ground. "Now what is it that makes you call me a 'cheater'? Not to mention, the 43rd time you called me that."

She sat beside my lying figure and embraced her folded legs just as a baby would when throwing tantrums. Well, yeah... just like an obnoxious kunoichi throwing tantrums at a lazy-ass so-so ninja.

"You told me that I should tell Sasuke-kun that I like him!" she blurted out accusingly.

"So?"

She drew a deep breath and lowered her head. "I've only been rejected..."

It was well-evident that as she talked about everything that had happened, loneliness is present. I knew this was coming. She won't just believe me.

Uchiha isn't the kind of guy to date or even say 'yes' to her—neither to any other girl. And according to my calculations, that is certainly 90 correct and 10 for a little hope.

A little hope for the impossible, that is.

Then I heard the sound that I've been dreaded to hear and that only made me the loneliest so-so ninja in the world.

"Good grief, Ino... Don't tell me you're crying..." I said bluntly.

She continued to sniffle as if she didn't hear my retort. Now why is Uchiha Sasuke such a big deal to girls—especially to her?!!

I was caught off guard when she flung onto me. And that only made me fell back to the ground with her—on top of me.

And there on my chest, she cried her heart out. With me, unmindful if she wets my beloved shirt. If that's the only way that could make her stop from such a troublesome reaction, then it's okay for me.

Even if I have to be hurt, too...

"Come on, Ino... It's not a big deal." I tried to calm her by rubbing her head.

She stomped my chest with her balled fist and exclaimed, "It IS a big deal Shika! In the first place, it's YOU who said that I should tell him about my feelings!!!! And now... And now!!!! Waaaaaaaahhhhh..."

Man... What was I supposed to do? Tell her to stop crushing Uchiha and like me instead?!

"Ino... don't waste that tears to a troublesome guy like him. Besides, maybe... it's just that you two weren't meant to be. Well, could you imagine what would happen to Konoha if a troublesome brat like you get together with a troublesome guy like him?!! And if you add that Naruto to our village and that dog-sniffing human Kiba, Hokage-sama's hair would fall off even more!!! Do you get that, Ino??? Geez... have mercy on us! Think about the troublesome future of Konoha!"

Yeah... the best way to shut her up is to tell things through a joke... If ever that thing sounded like a joke...

And you know what? She didn't.

She didn't shut up but she did stop crying. And now look at her?!!! She's laughing underneath my shirt like a lunatic!!!!!! Dear Kami-sama!!!! What have I done wrong to have this torture?????!!!

"Stop that, Ino. You're scaring me."

She continued to laugh and hugged me tightly. "What would I do if you weren't born Shika???!!!!"

I smirked as I felt the warmth coming off from her. It's not everyday that I get to be hugged by the girl that I've come to love so much, neh?

"If I wasn't born... then 'troublesome' would not be the perfect description for you..."

I felt her smile in return and we remained like that for some time. And there was a little hope tugging my heart that somehow, she could love me, too.

But looks like... there's a big difference between hope and reality...

She then whispered, believing that I didn't hear it, "I love you...my friend..."

"Shika-kun! Have you waited long?" she asked sweetly and ran towards me with a hand towel on her hand. Without any hesitation, she wiped my face with the towel and it only made me the infamous tomato-faced guy.

"Mou... Shika-kun! You shouldn't be hanging around here inside your room! There's no enough air! Look at you! Holding a cigarette and all..." she accused me and continued to wipe my forehead.

Is it just me or is she sounding like a real wife would?

She took the cigarette off my hand and threw it outside the window. Pulling me towards the outside of my room, she kept on telling some stuffs about 'beef', 'ramen' and 'vegetables' but I didn't bother to listen.

Instead, I focused on the way she treats me right now. Not to mention the impact of her hand on mine.

This is what I've wanted, right? What I've wanted to happen in my remaining days here...

And right now, I got to admit.

I'm going to hold on to my long-time wish to be with the woman I love until the day I die... and even after that.

"Shika??? What's wrong? Do you feel anything funny?" she asked waving off her hand in front of my face.

I may never get why she's doing this but at least I know why Kami-sama gave me this shit...

In order to have the chance to be with the woman I love until the day I die.

"No. I'm fine." I replied as she guided me towards the dining area. Placing the table napkin on my lap, she sat right in front of me and placed her palm on my forehead.

"I'm fine... really." I repeated again and set aside her hand.

She nodded and we began to eat in silence. I watched her secretly and noticed that she was having her own pool of thoughts just as I did a while ago.

I really appreciate it that she's caring for me now. But... would she still care for the next days?

And even after I die?

Would she even bother to visit my grave? Bring candles or flowers to me? Talk to me even if I wouldn't be able to hear her out?

If so, then dying wouldn't be such a complicated thing—as I thought it was.

"Ano... Shika..." she said partially startling me. Looking back at her as a response, she continued, "Ano... I just want to tell you. I won't leave this mansion. Not even you. I already told you, didn't I? I would take care of you in order to make up for my mistakes. Even if I wouldn't make you forgive me, at least... somehow I could perform my duty not just a wife but as a friend, too..."

Alright. I give up.

So much for this 'I-won't-forgive-you' show and stupidity.

"Ino... just stay. It's more than enough." I said simply and resumed eating.

I could feel her staring at me in confusion as if asking "You're not having a fever, are you?" and it only made me feel oh-so conscious to my self.

But then, she said something unexpected that I almost choked from swallowing my food.

"Arrigattou, Shika... Thank you for understanding..."

And that, my dear friends, could be the start of a new beginning for us or could be another warning for a relationship to be destroyed...

Author's Notes:

Ice:

Read and find out if Shika wil survive. XD And yes, I LOVE Shikamaru as the genius guy himself! Thanks again!

Chibi Minamoto:

.:Gives you the 27th roll of tissue paper:. Yes, poor shika... Very poor Shika... Thanks for the review!

Baby kakashi:

Yay!!! You came back! Thanks for reviewing again!!!!!! And yes, Shika and Ino are REALLY going to have a good time together... Thanks again!

Kitiara de Astaroth:

Yes, I know I can't kill Shikamaru. But... I just can't help it! LOL XD Thanks for the review and kip in touch!

magicians of the Yami:

Now isn't that such a cool pen name you got there? Yes! I'll keep updating! Thanks for the review!

Maruku-Kenshin:

Glad you liked the story and sorry if it was confusing at the beginning. Thanks again and kip in touch, too!

Narutogirl:

Thanks for liking the story! And yes, I would make more. Thanks again!

Kawaii34girl:

I;m happy that the story cleared up for everyone...eventually. LOL XD Thanks again!!!!

Hikaru of Arrow:

Thanks for the compliment!

Irukapooka:

Thanks for the review! And I've decided already that I'm going to have a sequel to this!

Yap! You read it right people! I'm having a sequel ready to this story!

Please let me know what you all think! Thanks to everyone and sorry if I made you cry!

Peace out and sorry for the late update!

Jeez... school sucks!!!!!!