(Sorry peoplez, I just couldn't resist it. Maybe when I finish Enchanted Seduction, I'll update this [Enchanted Seduction has about three chapters to go]. This fic is similar to my fairy tales version.)
Warning: If you are a really religious (Catholic/Christian) person that would get offended by bible parodies, I suggest you don't read this. I know they are not as real as the stories in the book. Yeah I know, these are Japanese characters we're talking about here. They're not supposed to be Catholic. I can be creative can I? But in this chap, there's a bit of "sexual scenes" going on. (No X-Rated. Before anyone goes nuts, remember that Nabiki poked Ranma's breast at Ranma ½)
Disclaimer: I told you I don't own Yu-gi-oh not to mention the bible stories. There, now you know, I'm a catholic. And even if I am, I don't always follow up on my religion.
In The Beginning:
Kaiba: God (don't worry, God's character will change in each story)
Anzu: Eve
Yami: Adam
Marik: Satan
Angel: Ishizu
It was Sunday morning in Domino Church. Shadi was stuck with teaching Sunday School while the original teacher had been sick. Fixing up his lessons, he saw in the lesson plan that today was Bible Stories.
Maybe this won't be so bad. Shadi smiled. As the clock struck 8:30, kids of shapes and sizes. They piled onto their assigned seats, some taking out their pillows and rested themselves on it, knowing that today's lecture was going to be another drone of their morning. And it was definitely going to be a long one, for Sunday School usually lasted from 8:30 to 10:30.
"All right," Shadi looked up and down the rows. "When I call your names, either raise your hand or say here." He took out the students list. "Anzu Mazaki."
"Here." A young girl with brown hair who sat in the second row raised her hand.
"Okay. Malik Ishtar?"
"Here." A young boy's voice chirped up as Shadi spotted him sitting by the window.
"Okay. Ryou Bakura?"
A young boy sitting in front of Malik raised his hand shyly. His white hair seemed slightly ruffled, haven't having the time to brush it.
"Okay." Shadi arched an eyebrow, continuing to scan the list. "Mokuba Kaiba?"
Mokuba, who sat in the second row, raised his hand.
"Let's see now, Joey Wheeler?" he scanned the room only to see Joey sleeping on his pillow. His expression changed as he made his way to the third row, watching him sleep for two more seconds before he yanked the pillow off of him and whacked him right on the head.
"It's Delaware Mr. Valentine!" Joey screamed at the top of his lungs. All of the students gave Joey the strangest look, wondering what in the world is he talking about. "Huh…? What the…?"
"Mr. Wheeler," Shadi gave Joey a cross look. "If you are going to sing the fifty states of America to Mai's father, please do so when you know you won't get humiliated." He then threw down the pillow on Joey's desk before making his way back to his desk. "Tristan Taylor?"
"Here."
"Duke Devlin?"
"Here."
"Yugi Mutou?"
"Here?"
"Ishizu Ishtar?"
"Here."
"Mai Valentine?"
"Here."
"Okay," Shadi smiled. "That's everyone. Today, according to your teacher's lesson plan, I will read you stories from the bible. Call this a no homework day."
[-]
Long, long ago, the world was nothing more than darkness. Even when the sun passed by, light wouldn't shine through the desolated land. Finally, a young god from the heavens decided to create something useful for this darkness.
"Hmm…" Kaiba scratched his chin as he read a book entitled How To Make a New World. He was aware that the land had only been engulfed by the darkness so he decided to go for it. First up, he needed to create both light and dark to indicate days, times and seasons, as well as years.
"Vini, Vidi, Vici!" Kaiba aimed his hand towards Earth and soon, the sun was on one side of the world while the moon was on the other. According to his book, it would take seven days to complete. "Ho boy…"
On the second day, he created the ocean. Mixing up the ingredients for the ocean water in his pot, he waited until it finished boiling and cooling before parting the clouds. Taking his pot, he dumped the water, filling the Earth with water.
On the third day, he decided to make some land so Earth wouldn't be how Neptune was, which was filled with water. Reading the spell in his book, he then lifted his hand up as he shouted. "Hocus Pocus!!" suddenly, he watched the land rising from the waters.
On the fourth day, he decided to add some life to his creation. Taking out a bunch of seeds from his bag, he tossed them into the Earth. Clapping his hands three times, the land was suddenly filled with tress bearing fruit and bushes with berries. Flowers bloomed all around but Kaiba was careful to not go overboard.
On the fifth day, Kaiba created animals to roam around and be free. Looking over his spell book, he saw that he needed toy animals. Rummaging through his box, he took out his miniature animals that he won last year. Placing all of them on the land, spreading them out evenly, he then called out, "Rise from the living, rise from the dead! Rise you animals or you shall not like what will happen to your head!" All of a sudden, the animals popped up and came to life and started to roam around. The birds started to fly to the bugs crawled.
"Jeez," Kaiba was giving his animals the strangest look. "All I was going to do was shave their hair off."
On the sixth day, he decided to create a human similar to himself so they can enjoy what he had created. Looking at the book, he frowned for it required him to sacrifice one of his ribs. He decided to do it anyway. Kaiba started to chant a spell, sacrificing one of his ribs to make a human being. No doubt it was a success as he saw a young naked man with tri-colored hair lying beside a tree. "Hmm…I should call you Yami. Hey, hey you!"
He watched Yami's eyes open, looking around. "Who…Who's there? Who said that?"
"You don't have to look around kid." Kaiba watched on. "I'm just saying you should go roam around and enjoy what I have and for my sake…" he shuddered. "Put a fig leaf."
Throughout the day, Kaiba was glad to see Yami enjoying himself. By the afternoon, he noticed that Yami was upset.
"What's wrong?" Kaiba arched an eyebrow.
"Well," Yami frowned. "The animals are great and all but I feel lonely."
Kaiba knew this would happen. He would be glad to make another human being but doing that would have to sacrifice one of Yami's ribs. With Yami still alive and awake, he knew there was no way Yami will give up his rib easily. "If you sleep now, you'll find something very surprising."
"I don't know my lord." Yami was quite skeptical. "How is sleeping going to make another human?"
"Are you trying to question my ability?" Kaiba was slowly getting ticked.
"No my lord." Yami stammered. "I'll get to sleep." He then curled up next to the tree and fell asleep.
At that instant, Kaiba started to chant something, taking one of Yami's ribs and creating a female version of a human. "You better say your prayers in thanking me Yami." He muttered to himself.
The next morning, Yami stirred awake. His eyes widened as he saw a naked woman sleeping right beside him. The young woman's eyes opened as well. Seeing Yami, she started screaming. "Eeek! Pervert! God, there's a pervert who tried to watch me sleeping!!"
Out of curiosity, Yami noticed that the female's chest seemed slightly bigger than his and appeared to be inflated. With a finger, he started poking at her breast. "Whoa."
The woman slapped Yami right in the face. "Pervert! My lord, who is this hentai freak?!?"
"Whoa, whoa Anzu calm down!" Kaiba tried to get Anzu to stop from going to insanity. "I just created you from Yami's rib."
"Say what?" Yami was surprised.
"Yeah, so Yami, this is Anzu. Anzu, this is Yami. Enjoy the Garden of Eden as much as you want, and please, try not to destroy it with your insanity. I did not create you guys for that."
"All right, fine." Said Yami.
"Eat all the fruits and berries and even vegetables I planted but…um…" he cleared his throat. "You see that tree over there?" he pointed to the trees that were disfigured. "I hate to be the one to tell you this but I don't want you guys eating from there."
"No problem." Anzu chirped up.
As Kaiba disappeared from their view, he smiled to himself. "Hmm…man, woman. There, that's what I should call those two. On this 7th day, I declare it my rest day." He sat back down, slightly exhausted from creating the Earth.
[-]
Days and weeks passed by as Yami and Anzu finally got along and lived life to their fullest. One day, they decided to check out the forbidden tree in which Kaiba called it "The Tree of Knowledge" and "The Tree of Good and Evil". Of all the trees, it had produced perhaps the most delicious fruit throughout the garden.
"It sure does look good." Anzu licked her lips.
"Yeah but you know what the man from upstairs said." Yami leaned against the tree. "We can't have any."
"Oh…" a hissing voice came from the tree. "Did he?"
"Who's there?" Anzu looked up, trying to see if anyone else was up there.
All of a sudden, a man wearing a cape jumped down the tree, smirking at Anzu. "The lord's fruit isn't forbidden you know. He just wants you to stay away from it and the reason why is that he wants you to stay ugly."
"Who are you calling ugly?" Anzu raised his fist to the stranger.
"She's not ugly!" Yami glared at the strange man.
"So sorry for the introductions but you two can just call me Marik." He turned his attention back to Anzu. "You have the potential to be beautiful, you know that? And this fruit can help you make your beauty beyond perfection. Something the lord wasn't willing to do for his creation."
"You really think so?" Anzu's eyes started to turn into a dream-like state.
"Anzu, don't listen to him!" Yami watched on, trying to stop Marik. Chuckling, Marik muttered something, creating an invisible wall to stop Yami. Frustrated, Yami tried to pound on the glass, hoping to shatter it but couldn't. He even tried screaming Anzu's name but he couldn't be heard.
Marik cupped his hand under Anzu's chin, lifting it up so they met face to face. "You're really beautiful, you know that? I bet you Yami has never told you that."
Anzu shook her head. "Of course he never does."
"That's a shame." He picked an apple from a tree and placed it on her lips. "Go ahead and try," his grip on her became tighter, pulling her closer to him. His eyes were hypnotic as he looked down on her. "After all, it's only a sin when you get caught. Don't you think so?"
"Mmhmm." Anzu was falling under Marik's spell no doubt. She then took a bite out of it, relishing on its juicy taste.
Finally, Yami manage to lunge towards Marik, wrapping his arms around him. "You idiot! She wasn't supposed to eat that!"
"What was that Yami?" Marik grinned. "You want to try one too? You could have just asked." He then tossed a piece of the fruit inside of Yami's mouth. Yami tried to spit it out but Marik clamped his hand over Yami's mouth, causing him to chew and swallow it. "Delicious isn't it?"
Suddenly, the two couldn't help themselves as they started to gather the fruit the can reach in the trees. In ten minutes flat, half of the fruit from the Tree of Knowledge and the Tree of Good and Evil are gone. Anzu was the first to realize this as she stopped Yami from eating the rest of the fruit. "Yam-chan, did you know that half of the forbidden fruit is gone?"
Yami stopped eating, choking on the berry. The disfigured trees that used to bear so many fruit now bear so little. "Oh my…"
And all of a sudden, thunder and lightning boomed the skies. Anzu and Yami dropped their fruits as they saw Kaiba's hand reached down from the clouds above.
"All right, which one of you ate the fruit even if you were told not to?"
Anzu pointed at Yami. Yami pointed at Anzu.
"Liars!! Just for that, you guys are no longer welcome here." He then picked up Yami's body and hurled him over the gate.
"Really my lord," Anzu pleaded. "There was this guy in a cape that told me…"
"Save it honey!" Kaiba picked up Anzu's body and hurled it out of the garden as well. Both of them landed in a place more wasted and dirtier than the garden itself. The gate closed and an angel appeared to be blocking it.
"Ishizu," Kaiba called out. "Keep an eye on the garden for a while. See that these two never come back."
A grin formed on Ishizu's face as she watched the two.
"What now?" Anzu wondered.
[-]
"And because they lied and disobeyed, Adam and Eve had to go in life living a drabby one. They no longer had the luscious fruits or the animals to keep them company." Shadi closed the bible.
"Question!" Malik shouted out.
"Er…yes Malik?" Shadi eyed Malik.
"Is it really true that it took seven days to make Earth?"
"Well," Shadi smiled nervously. "Sort of…I'm not exactly sure myself. But according to the book, it could be."
[-]
What do you guys think? I know, I may seem to be playing with religion for this but I wanna know what you guys think. If it's good enough to continue, just let me know.