A/N: Aaah! The eagles lost the superbowl. I'm still depressed about it. Fortunately there was a new Lost this week, which was just enough Sayid to get me through this chapter (you should really watch Lost, everyone) So yes, Chapter 22…

Please keep reviewing guys. You know the reviews get me writing faster :o). The next chapter will be Thanksgiving day. Mwhahaha. Ah, the irony. What do my characters have to be thankful for?

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Chapter 22

Dynamics

At noon on Wednesday Jeremy drives me over to West's and drops me and my suitcase off.

"Good luck," he says.

I shrug. "Thanks." He drives away.

Most everyone has already gathered. I drop my suitcase and then I sit down on it and watch the confusion taking place around me. I refuse to take part in any decision making today. Absolutely refuse.

See, here's the problem. West, Christian, and Chase are driving, and West has already volunteered to do the noble thing and drive Beauty and the Beast (Elton and Amy, respectively). Which leaves the rest of us—Sophie Walker, Natalie Banks, Jen, and I—to be divided up between Christian and Chase. There is no way I'm going to be the one who decides who I'm riding with. I'll do as I'm told.

The dynamics of this group are a little off. The problem is, there is somebody here that everyone dislikes. I still find Sophie Walker a bit annoying, and Chase has definitely avowed his hatred toward her. Natalie Banks can get a bit trying at times. And let's face it. Nobody here likes Amy. Elton probably doesn't even like her. And actually, nobody really likes Elton either. Especially Jen.

And even Christian—Christian who likes everyone, probably even likes Amy deep down. Even he has this subtle distain for Chase.

See. There's someone for everyone.

What are we doing? What are we all doing going to Texas together? Who's idea was this?

Right. Nobody's.

I realize I am paying no attention to all of my surroundings when Chase comes over and squeezes onto my suitcase beside me. Between the two of us we are definitely breaking whatever is inside of it. Fortunately, it's mostly clothes.

"You're man's being awfully valiant over there," he says, obviously referring to Christian. He looks down to gage my reaction at his calling Christian my man, but my reaction is nonexistent. Chase adds, "But I'm sure that doesn't surprise you."

"It doesn't," I say. And it doesn't. Christian is above all valiant. Above all good. If he's being valiant now, that probably means he's offering to drive Sophie and Natalie. He's letting Chase have me. He's letting me have Chase. He's avoiding a fight.

Damn. Secretly, I want to ride with Christian. But like I said, I'll do as I'm told.

Then Chase surprises me. He is suddenly and uncharacteristically generous. "But he can have you, anyway."

I look up at him then, and my astonishment must show clearly on my face. Chase continues to explain. "I figure this was supposed to be your thing anyway. You know, you and Christian and West and the lot. And obviously," he says, looking meaningfully at the crowd assembled in West's driveway, "that hasn't quite panned out. So you might as well have the ride there with Christian. I think I can suffer through a few hours in the car with Sophie Walker." He wrinkles his nose when he says her name. "I'll just play music really loud." Then he grins at me.

I'm struck by this unusual benevolence on Chase's part. "Thank you," I say.

He shrugs, "Don't mention it. Besides, I get you the rest of the weekend."

I shake my head and roll my eyes. I suppose you can only ask for so much generosity at once. Chase stands and says to me, "Now come on. Get off this suitcase so I can load it into the car."

I smile and stand up and let him lug the thing over the Christian's trunk. "You riding with me?" Christian asks, eyebrows up quizzically. It's obviously not what he expected.

"'Course, silly, who'd you think I was riding with?" I ask playfully. Christian chooses not to answer that question. Wise man.

"I guess that means I get Jen, too," Christian says instead. Then he frowns and looks around. "Where is Jen?"

"Late," West says. "And the only one not here."

"A girl after my own heart," I say proudly. Everyone rolls their eyes appreciatively. Jen shows up in the midst of all this eye rolling and Christian loads her stuff into his trunk. And now we're packed and ready to go.

I claim shotgun and climb into the front seat of Christian's car. Jen climbs in the back and we head out behind West. Christian flips on the radio and I start playing DJ, and suddenly I feel like maybe this trip is salvageable after all. So when Ashley Simpson comes on the radio I turn it up really loud and join in. Now I know "Pieces of Me" is a stupid song, but it's one of those songs that you've just got to sing along to when the moment is right.

And the moment is so, so right.

By the second chorus, Jen is joining in (though at a somewhat lower decibel). Christian is laughing at the both of us. How good is life? After that song, I turn down the volume a little so that we can talk over the radio. "Hey Christian," I say. "So we need to come up with a strategy."

"A strategy? For what" he asks, glancing towards me than back at the road.

"For the weekend! Duh!"

Christian laughs. "Did you just say 'duh'? Because I don't think I've heard anyone say that since like sixth grade."

I wave off the comment and continue with my original train of thought. "Somehow we need to orchestrate the dynamics of the group."

"Well, you are the master ochestrator."

"Right," I agree, though I'm not actually sure that that's a word. "So let's start paring people off now. West and Taylor obviously, and Elton and the Beast-Woman. I think Natalie and Sophie can handle themselves."

"I love the way you're always so sweet to Sophie Walker. It really shows your hidden depths," Christian interrupts with uncalled for sarcasm.

"Which leaves me and you and Jen and Chase," I continue as though Christian hadn't interrupted. "So Jen can hang with Chase for the weekend, which leaves me to you." I smile widely at my own brilliance. However, nobody else seems to be as impressed as I am. Or at least, they're pretending not to be too impressed.

First Jen says, with what is almost genuine bewilderment, "Why would I want to hang with Chase for the weekend?"

This is obviously an act. A very good act, I have to say, but an act nonetheless. Apparently Jen doesn't want anybody else on to this Chase business until It's for sure. Alright. I can dig that.

Christian adds, "And this is also assuming that I want to be spending all weekend with you."

This is obviously a joke from Christian, as spending the entire weekend with me is precisely what he would like to do.

Wow. I read people so well I stun myself sometimes.

"Fine," I say, wrinkling my nose and sending them both in turn a look of mock hurt and resentment. "I'll chill with Chase and you two can entertain each other. I didn't really want to spend time with you anyway."

This last comment is directed towards Christian and is accompanied by a slug on the shoulder. He laughs and replies, "Sour grapes."

(With this sour-grapes comment, Christian is both teasing me and referencing one of Aesop's Fables, something I've found in my years of adolescence and early adulthood that only Christian and I read as children. We're used to making the sour-grapes comment with each other. However, I find when you use it with other people, they have inevitably never heard of Aesop or his fables, and thus you have to go ahead and explain the whole sour-grapes fable to them. Which is really too long to explain concisely, so I won't be explaining it now, and if you want to know what Christian is talking about, go read Aesop.)

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We finally arrive at West's near ten o'clock. Mr. and Mrs. Anderson meet us at the front door and hugs and introductions go all around. I loved West's parents as soon as I met them two years ago. Christian and I they treat like old friends. Chase and I they treat like a couple. I wonder what West has been telling them.

"Anyway, I'm sure you're all exhausted," Mrs. Anderson says, and she proceeds to relate to us what options we have for sleeping. West's bedroom has a double bed (which I'm sure he and Taylor have dibs on), then there's one more bedroom with a double bed and one with a single. The rest of us are crashing in the den, which is a huge room full of plenty of couches and they say they dragged a futon down there too.

The Andersons leave us to sort it all out, and after a lot of discussion and some serious prodding from me, it's decided that Elton and Amy will take the other double-bed room. Natalie Banks would like the single room, and we're happy to oblige.

Which leaves me and Chase and Christian and Jen and Sophie Walker downstairs. We make our way down there and find the futon (which Jen and Sophie immediately claim). Then there's a pull-out couch bed, and another couch.

Umm…

At first there's a lot of joking about how I'm going to make Chase and Christian sleep together (ha ha) on the pull-out couch. But I know in the end I'm going to be on there with one of them. And you know, I suddenly feel a great wave of resentment towards Jen and Sophie, who obviously claimed that futon just to avoid finding themselves in the situation I'm in now.

So finally I toss the ball into the boys' court. I say, "Well, I get the pull-out bed, 'cause I'm the girl. You guys can duel or something to see who gets to share it with me."

And somehow between them they work it out that Christian is going to share the bed with me, and again I'm really surprised that Chase is being so… I don't know. He's just being so not like Chase.

But I have to say, I think I'm actually happy about the Christian decision.

I mean, just because it might be a little weird sharing the bed with Chase and all.

Then West comes down to make sure we're all okay, which we say we are and Jen adds, "Christian is sleeping with Becka," which has become the joke of the evening.

"Oh, I don't know if that's such a good idea," West teases, raising an eyebrow suggestively at Christian and I.

I roll my eyes. "Well, we've done pretty good for fifteen years. I think we can manage to keep our hands off each other."

"For one more night, at least," Christian adds jokingly.

"Okay, now I'm sleeping on the floor," I say. We all laugh.

I don't sleep on the floor.

I don't sleep much at all, actually. I had thought I would be more uncomfortable with Chase on the other side of the bed. But really, I don't think I could be any more uncomfortable than this. I'm scooted so close to the edge of the bed that I'm almost on the floor, and I can't, I just can't get to sleep.

Christian is my oldest friend, and sharing a pull-out couch with him with three more people in the same room as us should not cause this much panic. It shouldn't cause any panic at all. He seems to be sleeping fine, anyway. So what is wrong with me?

Now I know most people probably don't have their smartest moments at three in the morning, but maybe that's when I have mine. Because I'm lying here, and I'm thinking about everything that's happened over the past few months. And I'm thinking about the things Jeremy's been saying to me lately. And I'm thinking about how I can't lay any closer to Christian than this.

And I'm starting to come to terms with an idea that I think I've been trying to keep at bay for a long, long time.