A Flower in a Desert
Chapter II
A yawn escaped me, not even trying to be polite, and ignored the disapproving look my I't (Father) shot me. Unfortunately, my Mwt (mother) didn't let me brush off a punishment that easily and winced as she lightly tugged my ear.
"Atemu, don't be rude," she hissed, and I bowed my head in shame, and let my eyes focus inside my beer cup.
After sitting through my I't and the stupid advisors long speech of welcome to all the foreign kings and princes I was getting bored and hungry, and glanced at my cousin in envy as he sat still, and listening attentively, eyes locked onto the Pharaoh. Glancing at mwt to see if she was looking, I nudged Heba under the table to catch his attention and his beautiful big amethyst eyes glanced up to meet mine. A smile graced his lips when our eyes locked and I rolled my eyes silently pointing at the advisor talking and mouthed, "boring pamiu (old tom cat)". Heba glanced at the advisor and placed a delicate hand over his mouth, obviously trying to hide chuckle.
"And so let us sit and eat this wonderful feast!" the advisor ended and there was a round of applause which did not include me.
Heba nudged me with his foot under the table, and I grudgingly clapped, slow and quiet.
Servants suddenly appeared into the room, placing dishes of delicious smelling food in front of the guests and once my own plate was placed before me, I eagerly dug in, relishing the taste. To my greater delight, a woven basket filled with ripe figs was placed in the middle of the table between Heba and I. My mouth nearly watering with the knowledge of how the fig will taste with the first bite, my hand reached for one, and it seems another one was too when it overlapped mine. Eyes slowly rising up, a pair of cerulean blue eyes stared into me, brown hair framing her face. When I blinked, she gasped and snapped her hand back, like mine was some viper, and mumbled something that I couldn't quite hear.
"Um...did you want a fig?" I asked politely, handing one out to her.
She slowly looked up at me; her cheeks pink and slowly took the fig from my hand, and staring down at her plate, a small smile upon her lips.
"Uh...I'm Atemu," I said. "What's your name?"
"A...Anzu," she whispered, and I nearly had to lean into her to hear her.
"Oh, that's a pretty name," I complimented, and her cheeks went even pinker.
"Thank you."
We were silent, until a question left my lips.
"So, are you my cousin?"
"Uh...yes!" she answered shyly, but brave enough to look into my eyes. "My mwt is married to the pharaoh."
"Oh," I said with surprise and wondering why I have never seen her before. "Do you have any siblings?"
"No. But I have someone whose almost like a brother to me," she said smiling, her shyness melting for a moment.
"Who?" I asked in interest.
"Seito!"
"Oh," I said flatly, and glanced at my dear cousin who was sitting near the High Priests, and eating like a proper noble, making light conversation with some guests nearby.
Oooo, wouldn't I love to embarrass him in front of all of the guests...but then I could get in trouble and then he'll come to me every second with a new vision of death for me.
"Yeah!" she said cheerfully, now shyness replaced with excitement. "Isn't it amazing that he was able to become a High Priest in training at such a young age? Usually you have to be at least thirteen to even start, but he's only ten."
"The only reason why he was even given the privilege is because he's some "chosen" one that was gifted by Osiris the gift of foreseen death. And because he was right five times everyone now respects him," I grumbled.
"But don't you feel sorry for him? I mean, every night he's plagued by visions of death."
'He enjoys it,' I thought bitterly and felt anger rise up as I started remembering all the times he came up to me saying I was going to die this way or that or even this.
"Yeah, real sorry," I muttered sarcastically but I don't think she noticed.
After that, she started chatting on how great "Oh Mighty Seito" was and I discontinued listening after the first praise and nodded occasionally to pretend I was listening, but really trying not to snap my spoon in half. Thankfully the dinner ended sooner then I expected and everyone slowly headed towards the throne room where music greeted everyone and the inviting tempo luring guests to dance. For me, I went in search for Heba.
"Heba!" I called. "Heba!"
Footsteps started coming towards me from behind and I turned, hoping it was Heba, but instead it was Anzu. She glanced up at me shyly and slowly approached me, coming up to my chest.
"A...Atemu," she stuttered, her cheeks now red. "will you dance with me?"
My gut knotted. I didn't really want to dance with her, but I didn't want to hurt her feelings. So, with a nod I took her hands in mine and we danced. She turned out to be a beautiful dancer and her grace amazed me, no shocked me.
"Um, how old are you? If you don't mind me asking," I asked, as I spun her around.
"Eight," she answered.
"You dance well for an eight year old," I complimented.
"Thank you. I'm hoping to become a dancer. Since I'm no where near the throne line I think it will be alright for me to travel and dance for everyone," she explained.
Although I listened and nodded, my eyes still searched for my beloved cousin and I spotted him near the buffet table where small snacks where laid out for munching, and he was munching on a fig. I wanted to call him, but I didn't think he would be able to hear me over the music and chatter. But, to my luck, his eyes rose and locked onto mine.
I smiled, but it immediately dropped when he looked away and started walking out of my view.
'Heba?'
Worried, I stopped the dance, and politely told Anzu that the dancing had worn me out and that I had a very nice time with her, giving her a bow, before running off after Heba.
"Heba!" I shouted as I saw him and ran after him, but it didn't seem he could hear me. "Heba wait! What's wrong?"
He still didn't stop and I followed him out of the throne room and onto one of the balconies that was surprisingly not occupied by lovers. Heba leaned on the rail, staring up at the sky, the moon creating a faint glow around him. Panting from the effort to keep up with him, I set my hands upon the rail and wheezed, sweat rolling down my forehead.
"Heba, what's wrong with you? I mean, at first I thought you didn't hear me, but I'm sure you did when we were in the middle of the throne room," I said, but he still didn't look at me. "Heba? Answer me!"
"Do you like her?"
"What?"
"That girl? You talked to her all through dinner, and even danced with her. Do you like her?"
"Well, she's okay, and I like her as a cousin if that's what you mean," I said slowly, my heart tightening, my stomach twisting.
Was Heba...jealous? Did he like me like that too?
"Oh," he said quietly, his head bowing so his golden bangs hid his eyes. "Does that mean you'll be spending more time with her?"
"Is that...is that what you think?" I asked, shocked.
"Well...you did talk to her all through dinner..." he started.
"She babbled all through dinner not me!" I shouted in protest. "And it was all about Seito too. And you could have said something! Broke in or anything! But you didn't!"
"..."
"I would have cut conversation short if I could but Heba, I'm the heir to the throne and I have to be polite. Besides, unlike you, my mwt was sitting right there next to me."
There was silence before Heba took a big breath, and bowed his head bowing even lower.
"I'm sorry."
"It's alright," I mumbled, but Heba shook his head.
"No, it's not. I'm really sorry for acting so foolish right now. I guess I was jealous."
Love burst with in me and felt like kissing those full lips of his. Unfortunately fate is very cruel.
"Jealous of you," he said quietly, shaking his head and looking up at me. "You're always a good looking person and you can always attract the prettiest girls. I thought Anzu was very beautiful. Unfortunately I don't think she'll notice me since I'm at least a year younger then her."
"Oh..." I faltered trying not to cry.
Slowly I turned away and started walking away. So that was what was upsetting him. He fell in love with...Anzu...and felt jealous because she was spending time with me. I winced as I grasped my heart, and I felt like my world had just collapsed. Though half of me died, the other half scoffed. It was my own fault that I felt this way. Why had I been so sure that Heba could ever love me back? How could I even think that maybe he could ever love me? I was male and he was male. Sighing, I tried holding back tears, when soft hands grasped my arm but I didn't look back.
"Atemu? Atemu I'm sorry if I upset you with my foolishness," Heba said. "Did I do something wrong?"
No answer came, for fear that my voice would come out cracked and he would know that I was about to cry. I didn't want that. Instead, I gently tugged my arm away and started back inside the throne room.
"Atemu!" he shouted and my breath stopped as his arms wrapped around my waist his forehead pressed between my shoulder blades. "Atemu, I'm sorry, I'm really sorry, just please...don't be angry with me."
"I'm not," I said, then winced at how thin my voice was, and regretted even speaking.
His arms tightened around me.
"Don't cry Atemu! Please don't," he whispered in a cracked voice.
I felt something wet soaking the back of my shirt and knew my beloved cousin was crying, and guilt swept through me. Slowly, I turned and meant to kiss him upon the forehead to comfort him, but he looked up and I missed, and our lips met. In shock I pulled away quickly, my cheeks hot, and stumbling a few steps back.
"I...I'm sorry. I...I didn't mean there...I...I meant..." I stammered, as I watched Heba nervously.
Heba stood there, eyes wide and filled with surprise, and slowly his hand touched his lips, and a deep blush spread across his cheeks. Before a word was said I't appeared, grasping me by the shoulders and steering me towards one of the foreign kings, mentioning his name and what his kingdom did for Kemet. I nodded at everything that was told, but my mind was far away, very far away.
(..)
Ever since of the kiss, I've been avoiding Heba and I think he's been avoiding me. It was two days since the party and we haven't seen or talked to each other. Mwt asked me if everything was all right between us and I absently nodded in response.
"If everything's alright then why don't you two talk to each other anymore?" she asked, with a frown. "I talked with Neferhnd and she said that Heba seems dazed and when ever she even mentions your name he runs out of the room."
"He must hate me," I whispered, but she heard.
"Why would he hate you?" she asked. "You two have been close since his birth. Why would he stop loving you?"
My cheeks felt hot and I buried my face into my pillow, not really wanting to talk about it.
"Atemu," she said gently and I felt the bed gently bounce from her weight. "What happened?"
"Ummm, maybe Seito said something stupid," I murmured.
"This has nothing to do with Seito and you know it," she said and I buried my face deeper into my pillow. "Please tell me mwt why? I love you and no matter what I won't hate you."
"Not even if I like guys?"
There was a very awkward silence, and I felt my whole body become hot with embarrassment and I felt my chest constricting as I started to cry.
"See! You hate me! You hate me!" I sobbed childishly.
"Honey," she whispered gently, and I felt her hands upon my shoulders. "I don't hate you. I'm just surprised. Since when have you liked males?"
"...Well," I said slowly, lifting my face somewhat from the pillow that was starting to block air from my lungs. "I don't really like...males...but one in particular."
"And you told Heba that you loved him like a lover," she finished.
"No...I didn't say that," I said, starting to sit up to face her. "Heba looked distressed and I was going to kiss him upon the brow to make him feel better but then he...looked up."
"Oh...my," she said quietly.
"Don't tell I't," I whispered.
"Does anyone else know?"
"I think Mahado does. And he seemed pleased."
"Are you ashamed?" she asked.
"Ashamed of what?"
"Of falling in love with Heba?"
My head slowly sunk and I nodded. Arms wrapped around he and hugged me tightly.
"Honey, don't be. There's nothing wrong in liking people of your own gender."
"But Seito..."
"Don't listen to him. He only bring trouble," she said bitterly before it softened. "Atemu, priests say that when two men fall in love one of them posses the ka of a woman. And want to hear a secret?"
"What?" I asked, sniffing.
"You were supposed to be a girl."
I stopped, and stared at her in disbelief.
"You mean...Heba was suppose to be a girl...right?" I said slowly.
"I know it seems more likely that Heba would be the female but no. It was you. It was a surprise when you were a boy instead of a girl."
Now I was numbed with shock. Me? Me!? I, Atemu, heir to Kemet was supposed to be a girl! What kind of joke were the gods playing! A cruel one, that's for sure. I mulled over it all afternoon and while I was walking down the hall I unknowingly started muttering about it.
"A girl? How could I be the girl? That's illogical? I don't even know if that's even possible? Me? I'm more manly then most of my cousins yet I was suppose to be a girl!?"
"Um...Atemu?"
"That's just not fair. I mean, why couldn't have been Seito? Then at least I could have something new to tease him about!"
"ATEMU!"
"Ah!" I shouted and spun around and my heart nearly stopped when I saw Heba right behind me, hands clasped behind his back and eyes locked onto his feet. "Heba, you scared me."
"Sorry," he muttered, before looking up. "Atemu, about the kiss..."
"I'm sorry about that," I said quickly. "I meant to kiss your brow like I always did when we were young, but you looked up and I accidentally got you on the lips. Hope I didn't...give you the wrong impression about me."
Heba smiled, but it seemed forced.
"Not at all," he stammered. "Um...hahahaha. I guess the gods like playing around with us."
"Yeah, I noticed," I chuckled.
"So," he said slowly. "What were you muttering about in the hallway?"
"Oh, you won't believe what I found out!" I said, happy to find something else to talk about besides that awkward kiss. "My mwt just told me that I was suppose to be a girl!"
"What! You're kidding!" Heba shouted, and started laughing. "You, Atemu, was supposed to be a girl?"
"Hey, hey, not so loud, if Seito hears about this, I'll never live it down," I muttered.
"Sorry," he said, smiling brightly, and his hand grasped mine. "But I think you'd make a cute girl."
"Now, don't you start..."
"What? You would. I bet if you were a girl, Seito would probably fall head over heels for you."
"Which is why I'm glad I'm not," I grumbled. "Can we not talk about this? It gets me nervous."
"Sure, sorry," he said, before tugging my sleeve. "Hey, Atemu, can I tell you something?"
"Um...sure."
"Mwt's pregnant."
I stopped and gave him a smile.
"Congratulations!" I said happily, but noticed Heba didn't seem all that thrilled. "What's wrong?"
"Well, I don't mean any ill to mwt but...I don't know if I'm ready to become a brother yet."
"Ah...I can understand that," I said, nodding.
"How can you? You're an only child."
"Not so. My mwt's pregnant too."
"What! You mean both our mwt's are pregnant? So we're both going to be older brothers?"
"Uh huh," I said with a nod, and threw an arm over Heba's shoulder. "And I'm not sure I want to be a brother either but do you know what? I'm going to try for my mwt. Will you try for your mwt too?"
Heba's eyes glazed as he started to think then nodded.
"I'll try for mwt," he said and smiled up at me. "Thanks Atemu."
"Hey, that's why I'm here," I said gently.
"Atemu."
"Hm?"
"I...I..."
"You what?" I asked curiously.
"Atemu!" came a sudden shout and we both turned around to see...Anzu. "Atemu, I'm so glad to see you again!"
I felt Heba slip from my grip and felt jealous as he smiled at Anzu his eyes brightening with love.
"Oh, who are you? Are you Atemu's brother?" she asked.
"I'm his cousin. Heba. Our mwt's are twins and both married the Pharaoh."
"Really?" she said, her eyes thoughtful, before latching onto my arm. "Atemu, let's walk through the market place!"
"Um...Anzu, I don't mean to be rude, but if you hadn't noticed, Heba and I were talking," I said trying to keep the irritation from my voice and forcing a smile upon my face.
"Oh," she said, her eyes bright with surprise, and I suppressed rolling my eyes. "But you can talk to him later! I want to get to know you better!"
Gods. Anzu might be a cute girl, but she sure can be annoying.
"Alright, alright," I muttered, feeling a headache starting to form, but before she could drag me away, Heba grasped my other arm.
"Um...do you mind if I join?" he asked shyly, looking at Anzu.
"Okay!" she said brightly. "We can all three go together!"
'Oh Ra take me now.'
(..)
The market was crowded, as usual, with the normal nosy conversation and friendly smiles and waves. This was more comfortable for Atemu instead of having everyone nervous, bowing constantly and muttering in speech."Atemu," Anzu whispered. "Why did you have us disguise ourselves?"
"I'm more comfortable this way," I answered simply.
Before we left, I insisted in changing into beggar clothing and though Anzu seemed clueless why, she still obeyed without complaint. Which was a relief.
"Anzu," Heba said shyly, and she turned towards him, smiling.
"Yes?"
"Um...can you come with me for a moment?"
"Sure!"
Relief swept through me when Anzu disappeared and took the opportunity to inspect what merchants were selling. There was food, clothing, jewels, silk and spice. Frowning, I started the hard task in deciding what in Ra I would buy, when whispers caught my ear.
"Okay, lesson one, steal an apple."
"But it's wrong to steal."
"You idiot! What do you think our family business is all about? Now go get the fucken god damn apple!"
"But...but...would if I get caught?"
"Are you blind you fucken moron!? The stupid apple is in a barrel that is on the merchants blind side. And nobody gives a damn if some kid steals one apple!"
"Oh...okay."
I slowly turned my head and crouching behind a stack of barrels were two boys, maybe my own age. Both had a head of white hair, darkly tanned skin and tattered clothing. The only difference between them was that the one who sounded older had a scar across his cheek and insane bright blue eyes, while the other had soft brown. From what I suspected, they were twins.
"One, two..."
"Wait!" the younger one shouted.
The older rolled his blue eyes.
"What now Ryou?"
"I...I have to go to the bathroom?"
The older seemed very much unamused and grabbed the boy, Ryou, by the back of the shirt and shoved him towards the apple bin. To my amusement, Ryou slowly crawled towards the apple crate and snatched one, hiding it under a tattered vest and running back towards his brother.
"I did it! I did it!" he shouted excitedly, but unfortunately that drew the merchant's attention.
"Hey! Thief! Give back my apple!" the fat merchant bellowed and the older brother whacked Ryou over the head.
"Idiot! Run!" he shouted and both twins ran for their lives as the fat merchant started after them.
Shaking my head, I turned back to the booth before me, looking for a piece of jewelry that would catch my eyes.
"Are you interested?" came a kind voice and I looked up and smiled.
"Yes, ma'am."
"Are you looking for something in particular?"
"No."
"Are you just looking for something that catches your eye?"
"Yes."
"Then how about this?" she asked holding out a golden pendent of Ra's eye with a red blood jewel in the middle.
I shook my head; it was pretty but didn't seem the right item.
"Do you have anything that's...less gold and less fancy."
"Like this?" she asked, hold up a silver chain with a small scarab pendent hanging down. "And if you turn it upside down, it says this."
My eyes widened at the writing and smiled.
"Perfect. And...do you have any...marriage rings?" I mumbled face becoming red.
"Ohhh," she said slowly, smiling. "Ready to propose to a lovely young lady."
"Something like that," I said, nodding.
"That will be two silvers."
A gold coin was tossed onto the counter and I tucked my purchases in my pouch before hurrying away.
'Someday, maybe soon I'll give these to my lover,' I thought as I waited for Anzu and Heba to appear. 'Someday, I'll give it to my...desert flower.'
(..)(..)(..)
Note: I apologize for making people wait for this, and I hope people don't think I'm dead.
Next Chapter: Atemu and Heba are going to have siblings? And what the hell do you mean there's going to be a war!?
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