Title- Almost
Fandom- Naruto
Pairing- Sasuke x Gaara
Author- sporkai
Challenge # 43- "You and Me" I sang looking at the cemetery.
Words- 1,150
Rating- R
Disclaimer- In no way shape or form do I own Naruto. This is probably a good thing.
Warnings- Dark, character death, necrophilia (Don't ask, just don't ask. And don't flame me for this, I'm putting the lovely warning right here so if anyone is very much squicked and/or disturbed by necrophilia don't read this. And just for the record, I am not a necrophiliac either.)
Almost
His gravestone looked exactly the same as every other one in Konoha's cemetery. Even so, Sasuke knew exactly where it was, like it stuck out to him in the sea of white stone. He stood in front of it once he found it and stared at the neatly carved kanji spelling out Gaara's name. If he closed his eyes, he could still see them. He could still see Gaara too, and the tattoo he'd had on his forehead.
Eventually, he sank down on his knees and leaned his head against the cool surface of the headstone. Tears welled up in his eyes and he didn't bother trying to hold them back. Gaara, or more specifically, Gaara's body, was buried right underneath him, but he still couldn't come to terms with the other man's death.
Sasuke was still in the same position a few hours later when the sun set, and eventually, he fell asleep. He dreamed of the day Gaara died, as he'd done every time he had gone to sleep since then.
.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-
Gaara's body had lain limp at his feet, a thin trickle of blood coming out of the redhead's mouth and running down his chin. Sasuke had dropped to his knees then too, and pressed two fingers against Gaara's neck, searching for a pulse he already knew wasn't there.
Gaara didn't look dead, he was just as beautiful as he'd ever been, and Sasuke tried to convince himself that Gaara had finally been able to fall asleep. Because Gaara couldn't be dead. He was Gaara, no one could kill him, he was too strong. Yet there he was, lying dead on the ground. No, not dead, just sleeping for a while, getting some well deserved rest. That's what Sasuke told himself.
Gently, Sasuke brushed his fingertips against the other man's cheek, expecting him to flinch and pull back. Gaara hated being touched. But he didn't, his eyelashes didn't even flutter. He was still warm, and his skin was smooth and nice to touch. His lips were soft too, Sasuke found as he brushed his fingers against them as well. He had always thought they would be dry, rough, and chapped.
He'd always wondered what it would be like to kiss them. Tentatively, he leaned over Gaara's face, and slowly lowered his own to it. Closer and closer until his lips were an inch away from the others. The logical part of his mind was telling him that this was wrong, that Gaara was dead, and kissing wasn't going to bring him back either. Sasuke ignored it and pressed his lips to Gaara's.
And it was almost everything he had imagined. Gaara was not wrapping his arms around him and digging his fingernails into his back, he was not breathing heavily, his face was not flushed, and his mouth was un-responding. But he still had a taste that was so uniquely him, so Gaara, that it didn't matter to Sasuke that all he was kissing was an empty shell of the man he'd once loved; still loved. It wasn't just an empty shell to him, it was still Gaara; he was still Gaara.
He found his hands roaming down Gaara's body as he kissed him, pulling and tugging his clothes searching for pale skin. Sasuke had always thought Gaara's trench coat made him look very sexy indeed, but at the moment, it was very much a hassle trying to undo the straps. The frustration made looking at Gaara's bare chest all the sweeter. Gaara wasn't as thin as he'd thought; ribs barely showed through his flawless skin. He was so beautiful.
Sasuke explored Gaara's chest and stomach with his fingers for a long while before moving them lower and unzipping his pants and sliding them to his ankles. He stared at the unmoving body for a long time, finally hearing the logical part of his mind. It was not Gaara, it was Gaara's body, but it was not Gaara. His mind was also telling him that he was a sick and very fucked up person. And Sasuke was about to agree with it and stop what he was doing right then and there.
But the part of his mind, the part that could only think about Gaara disagreed. Gaara had never let Sasuke touch him when he was alive; apart from the few times they'd laced their fingers together. This, it argued, was Sasuke's last and only chance to touch Gaara, and to show him how much he'd really loved him.
In the end, Sasuke agreed with the second part of his mind.
Hesitantly, he straddled the sand-nin's hips, still expecting him to squirm away. But Gaara didn't move. Sasuke leaned down and kissed him again, softly and chastely, although it was hard for the first part of his mind to believe any part of what Sasuke was currently doing was 'chaste'.
Sasuke expected Gaara to moan when he pushed into him. He'd expected him to moan, arch his back, dig his nails into Sasuke's arms, and throw his head back. He'd wanted to believe that Gaara would wake up and he would do all those things, just like he did in Sasuke's dreams. But he didn't. Gaara didn't move at all, didn't make a sound.
And Sasuke realized that Gaara really, truly was dead.
Hot tears ran down his cheeks as he thrust harder into the other as hard as he could, trying desperately to wake him up. Things weren't supposed to be like this, Gaara was supposed to be looking up at him with his eyes clouded in lust and moaning and panting Sasuke's name. If he closed his eyes, he could almost hear Gaara's voice again. Almost.
Sasuke came with a moan and pulled out, then he redressed himself and Gaara. Gaara didn't do anything.
"Gaara…" He called softly, hoping that maybe the sound of his voice would reach Gaara wherever he was, and that Gaara would hear him and come back to him. "G-Gaara…" His voice began to crack, and Gaara still didn't move. Sasuke's voice hadn't reached him. Tears fell on the pale face, but they had no power like in the books Sasuke's mother had read to him when she had been alive, his tears didn't bring Gaara back either.
.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-
Sasuke awoke with his body slick with cold sweat and tears running down his face as he body trembled. He didn't move from where he was until the sobs stopped wracking his body. Then he got up, wiped the dirt and grass of his knees, and walked away like he did every morning. And when he got back to his apartment, he thought, Gaara would be there waiting for him, because that's how things were. Gaara was like the sky or the sun; he was always there.
The sun still rose in the sky, but when Sasuke got back to his apartment, Gaara wasn't there.
…I feel like a very sick and demented person now. More than I usually do. I'm gonna go smack myself. And there is no story behind why I had Gaara died. They were on a mission or something and he got killed, because I needed him to be dead for this, so he was. And it made me sad. Also, I know the whole fucking a dead body is more of a Gaara thing to do, but my mind simply cannot see him as seme. Ever. So Sasuke had to do it. Plus, I decided I should torture some other poor, fictional soul for a while.
Reviewer replies (sorry most of these are really short, I'm feeling very lazy right now)
Yoko-san- Yes, it was in Gaara's POV, I just forgot the put that in there. I'll have to go back and fix it when I feel less lazy. And it is a magical collection of one-shots and such, but a lot of people asked for a companion or a sequel or whatever to the last one so I'm gonna write one eventually.
TheFutureFreaksMeOut- Yes, yes you do have a writing style. And it is beautiful and magical and I love it to little tiny pieces. –sigh- I'm so mean to Gaara. But Sasuke loves him, he really does…I just like to torture him.
Junsui Kegasu- Poor Sasuke, everyone hates him. But that's his fault for being so easy to bastardize, ne? I think Sasuke handled himself quite well in Future's chapter, he did better than I would have done anyways.sorviball- Well, it was going to be a oneshot, but then a lot of people asked for a sequel/companion thingy, so I'm going to write one later. Plus I don't want everyone to hate Sasuke (as easy as that is to do).
Fantastical Queen Ebony Black- …I still didn't update the world is black. I feel evil now. Did the last one really disturb you? I bet this one wasn't much better was it? I think I'm going to make it my new goal to write something nice and non-disturbing where everyone is happy.
Fay- Mwahaha, I have made everyone hate Sasuke (although I don't know if I should be proud of that, lol) And have no worries, I shall write a magical sequel to the last one, and it probably shall be in Sasuke's POV.
Scapegoat- Yays, I updated! And I think I made Sasuke nice this time, if not a little insane.
Angelic-kill- -laughs evilly- I'm so mean to poor Gaara. But this time Sasuke was nice. Disturbed, but nice.
Jasmine Starlight- Yay for sex! Thanks for the review!
Kokuei no Onchuu- Yes, I agree with you, and I shall put it on another line when I feel less lazy. –sweatdrop-
littleanikaze- Aww…I'm sorry that I made you sad…