When Homer next saw Flanders, the man was racing frantically along the corridor, being pursued by a woman wearing a red and white dress and garish lipstick.

"Don't touch me!" Ned shouted at the woman. "You're not real! You're a demon! A monster!"

"It's me, Neddy," said Maude sweetly. "I've come back for you."

Before Homer had a chance to say "What the…", Ned pushed past him into the Simpson living quarters.

"Hello, Homer," said Maude when she encountered her one-time neighbor.

Homer stared at her for a second, then began to laugh heartily. "You must have scared the crap out of Flanders," he chuckled.

"Aren't you surprised at all to see me alive?" asked Maude seriously.

"Not a bit," said Homer. "You're the third dead person we've seen walking around since we got here. Fourth, if you count Snowball I as a person."

"I am not dead!" Maude insisted.

Inside the dwelling, Ned charged into Bart's bedroom and snatched away the laser pistol the boy was playing with. "Hey, be careful with that!" Bart scolded him. "It could go off!"

Then Homer heard a stern voice from behind his back. "Get out of the way, Homer!"

He swiveled. "Huh? What are you…"

Homer barely managed to skip out of the way before Ned pulled the trigger, firing a scarlet blast of death into Maude's bosom. With an alarmed scream, she plummeted backwards.

Horrified, Homer, Marge, and Bart gathered around the fallen, motionless woman. A black, scorched area marked the front of her dress. Oddly, there was no smell of seared flesh.

"Omigod, she's dead!" Marge exclaimed. "Again!"

"That thing is not my wife," said Ned, breathing heavily and gripping the pistol.

"No one's arguing with you, Flanders," said Homer as he rose. "But you could've hit someone who really is alive."

"I need to sit down," said Marge, walking unsteadily to the couch.

Ned lowered the weapon and bent over the mortally wounded woman, gazing wistfully at her. "What have I done? I know she's not Maude, but whoever she is—whatever she is—I just murdered her!"

"Murders committed by Flanders, one," joked Homer. "Murders committed by me, zero."

"I figured she was a demon, and she'd turn into smoke and float back to Hell, or something," said Ned sadly.

"Oh, come on," said Bart condescendingly. "I can't believe the ignorance I'm seeing. She's clearly an alien cyborg replicant, as the autopsy will prove."

"But this alien duplicate might have been somebody's mother," said Ned, tears streaming down his cheeks.

As he, Homer, and Bart stood about the dead figure, Bleeding Gums Murphy strolled down the hallway accompanied by Lisa, who held a white cat in her arms. "Mom, Dad, I found Snowball!" she announced. "She was eating catnip in the…oh, my Buddha!"

She and Murphy both gaped when they saw Maude stretched out on the floor. "What's the number for 911 out here?" asked the jazzman.

Maude suddenly yanked in a breath.

"Wha…" stammered Ned as he wiped his eyes.

Maude breathed again. Her incinerated chest heaved up and down.

"She's alive!" cried Homer.

"Look!" exclaimed Lisa, pointing.

Fabric was appearing around the edges of Maude's wound. It spread throughout the blackened area like a wave of cotton, until the woman's chest was restored to its old state.

Maude stood up with some difficulty. She glanced around at the surprised visages of the others, then looked at Ned. "You shot me, Neddy. Why?"

Flanders stuttered as he searched for words. "I-I'm sorry, honey. I didn't know it wouldn't kill you."

"That was the wrong thing to say to a woman," Bart remarked.

"Put the gun away, boy," Homer commanded his son.

"Sure, Homer," said Bart, grabbing the laser pistol from Ned and skipping to his room.

"More importantly," said the consternated Maude, "how did I survive being shot—not to mention the fall at the race track? Do I have nine lives, like a cat?"

An instant later Rod and Todd scampered into the living room. The sight of Maude startled the pajama-clad boys.

"Look, Rod! It's Mommy!" Todd exclaimed.

"She's not dead anymore!" Rod cried jubilantly.

"Oh, my little boys," gushed Maude, wrapping her arms around them. "Were you good for Daddy while I was gone?"

"Yes, Mommy," said Rod and Todd together.

"Don't lie," Maude scolded them. "It makes Baby Jesus cry."

Ned, visibly shaken, shuffled into Lisa's room. Homer, Marge, and Lisa, concerned about his state of mind, followed him.

"You okay, Flanders?" said Homer. "Please say no."

"Homer!" Marge snapped.

Lisa tried to massage the troubled man's shoulders. "I know how you're feeling," she said. "When Bleeding Gums showed up, I almost flipped my lid. I even considered converting back to Christianity."

"I can't believe I just shot an angel," Flanders mumbled. "Now I'll go to hell for sure."

"An angel?" said Lisa. "What do you mean?"

"What else can she be?" said Flanders anxiously. "She died, she came back, and now she's immortal."

Lisa stepped aside when she saw Maude and the boys entering. "Neddy, talk to me," Maude urged.

Ned did talk to her, but not in the manner she expected. Dropping to his knees, he stretched out his arms and bowed before her. "I am not worthy to be in thy presence," he said reverently.

TBC