Chapter 3!
(The Hogwarts Express arrives at Hogwarts castle on a surprisingly clear night.)
Nikki: Our three heroes climb off the Hogwarts train, and-….wait a minute…where's Ron?
Herms: He disappeared when he went to go change his clothes.
Nikki: Minutes pass, but still no sign of Ron. (raises voice) Did an evil death eater take hold of him? (gets louder) Did he get eaten by a live dragon? (people start to look and be frightened by Nikki) WILL HARRY BE ABLE TO SAVE HIM!
(At that moment Ron steps out of the train looking disheveled…followed by the old candy-cart lady, who looked equally disheveled…which is very awkward)
Nikki, Harry, Hermione:…
Ron: (looking confused) What?
(The whole crowd looks at Ron with disgusted expressions. Professor McGonagall steps out of the crowd.)
McGonagall: (disappointed) Come now Mr. Weasley.
Nikki: The students settle down in the Great Hall. Ron comes back and sits next to Harry. Harry and Hermione give Ron more awkward looks. Poor dude.
Ron: (hysterical) What!
Harry and Hermione: (sighs) Nothing.
Dumbledore: Welcome to another year at Hogwarts! I hope you have all learned from a particular student that it is never a good idea to display- well, to- doanythingyouwouldregretespeciallywithaMUCHolderpersonthanyourselves. Whew!
Ron: (laughing) Ha! Who was that idiot! Haha!
Harry and Hermione: (roll eyes) Oh dear.
Dumbledore: Now, let the sorting begin!
Sorting Hat: Hey! Hold on you old bag! Don't I get to sing my friggin' song?
Dumbledore: (glaring) Well, yes, proceed.
Sorting Hat: (clears throat) Eh hem.
Welcome to another year,
I hope you brats are ready.
For this one is going to be full of fear,
So keep your morals steady.
Drop the beat DJ.
(A random DJ appears out of nowhere, and he drops a phat beat. The Sorting Hat starts dancing.)
When Death Eaters try ta get at you,
Curse it like it's hooottt, curse it like it's hooottt, curse it like it's hooottt
When Voldy wants to kill you,
Curse it like it's hooottt, curse it like it's hooottt, curse it like it's hooottt
If Draco starts hatin',
Curse it like it's hooottt, curse it like it's hooottt, curse it like it's hooottt
I got magic on my mind, and Ron's rollin' some flyin' car, and Harry don't give a censored 'cause he's got it goin' on.
Hooooooooooooooooooooooogwarts
(The song is greeted by a long silence.)
Harry: (muttering to Ron and Hermione) What do I have going on?
Dumbledore: Uh…thank you for that…lovely song.
Sorting Hat: Fo' shizzle!
(The sorting begins.)
McGonagall: Alvin, Paul!
Sorting MC: Hufflepuff!
Hufflepuffs: Yay!
McGonagall: Burtin, Holly!
Sorting MC: Ravenclaw!
Ravenclaws: Yay!
McGonagall: Kerry, John!
Sorting MC: Democrat!
Democrats: Yay!
Author's Note: Sorry about the extremely long update, it's summer now, and I have alot more free time. Please, please review, it keeps me going!
Disclaimer: Just to be sure I don't own anything HP or Snoop Dog's "Drop it Like it's Hot." So don't sue me.