Author's Note: the disclaimer is in my profile, sorry for not mentioning this earlier. Also the text in (this) is a flashback.

Conan's Burden

Conan was speechless in shock after his father said that, she missed her period.

"But… but," Conan stuttered, "then… that… that means… she's… she's…"

"Pregnant." Suddenly so many things were going on in Conan's mind all at once. His eyes grew wider and his mouth fell open. "I asked who the father is," his dad continued, "and she said it's you."

"I didn't mean to," Conan pleaded.

"What do you mean?"

"We spent one last night together, and I… I… It was her idea."

"Conan, I've wanted to ask you why you chose to stay this way, and I'd really like to know now." Conan searched his mind for the honest and absolute truth. He took a deep breath to relax.

"Well, as you know dad, I've been this way about five years now. Dr. Agasa has found a way to transform me back into Jimmy temporarily, but I wanted it to be permanent. I wanted to go back to being Jimmy Kudo. I hated having to worry about making Rachel and my new friends feel neglected. I wanted one life, and I wanted it right away. So I chose the easy way out, I chose to stay the way I was because it was the quickest solution. Also I thought that if I desist being Jimmy Kudo I'll have to break up with Rachel, but I couldn't because if I did she'd want to be friends, so I had to die. But I wanted one last date with her, to show her that I'd always love her. One thing led to another and, we did it." His father rubbed his forehead and sighed.

"Conan, I thought you were smarter than that. You should've been prepared."

"I know," Conan replied sobbing. "I know. And the next morning she was gone and I didn't even get to say good-bye." Conan buried his face in his hands, got up, and dully went to his room and threw himself on the bed.

-----

The next day Conan didn't want to leave the comfort of his bedroom, but knew he had to eventually.

'Why did I do it,' he thought. 'Why was I so blind? She wanted me to go with her, but why did I follow?' He pondered this for awhile before saying the answer out loud. "I love her."

Later he went to get himself something to eat. His father was sitting on the couch reading the paper when he noticed Conan.

"Are you ok Conan," his father asked.

"Yeah, I guess so."

"What's on your mind?"

"Well, nothing except Rachel, and then there's Amy. I have a date with her tonight."

"Amy?"

"Yeah, she's my Rachel now. Amy and Rachel are alike in so many ways. I guess that's why I love her too." Conan heard his father sigh again.

"You know, just because you're Conan Edogawa now doesn't mean Rachel has to be out of your life forever now too." This hit Conan real hard.

"I didn't think about that."

"Yeah, well, you made a choice and now you have to deal with it. Just don't make the same mistake with Amy as you did with Rachel."

"I won't."

-----

On Conan and Amy's date they went to an amusement park. While they stood in line for a rollercoaster Conan began to have memories.

'I remember when Rachel and I use to come here and have fun.' As he thought that Amy pulled his arm and they got on the ride. The rest of the date was filled with excitement and love.

They left when it was night, but they didn't go home right away. They found an empty alley and hid in there. Amy kissed him and she finally felt comfortable enough to kiss deeper. Conan accepted her, kissed back, and soon it became a perfect make out session. After for what seemed like forever Conan walked Amy home. When they reached her house they shared one last passionate kiss. As Conan headed home he passed Rachel's building and heard yelling coming from inside.

'Uh oh,' thought Conan. 'I guess she just told her dad the news.' Conan decided not to listen and hurried home.

-----

"Pregnant! What do you mean pregnant?" Rachel sat on her bed while her father paced back and forth in front of her. "How… How could you?"

"I told you already, one thing led to another."

"Tell me who the boy is. I'll kill him!"

"You don't need to because he's already dead. The father is Jimmy."

"Jimmy! Jimmy Kudo?"

"Yes." Her father decided to control his rage since she was already crying.

"What are you going to do now Rachel?"

"What do you mean?"

"Well, are you going to go back to school? Get a job? You need to get money somehow."

"I'll go back to school, and get a part-time job or something."

"I think you should have an abortion."

"No! I'm not getting rid of it!"

"Why not?"

"Because, it's the only thing I'll have left of Jimmy." More tears swelled in her eyes. "I don't want to give it up." Her father gave a big, long groan.

"Well, if that's what you want fine, but you got to get a job to pay for the things it'll need." Without another word he left the room and yelled curses as he closed the door. Rachel lied on the bed and sobbed into her pillow.

-----

Monday when Conan went to school Amy was waiting for him at his locker. She started kissing him but Conan looked around to see if Mitch was near. He wasn't so Conan kissed her back deeply. When they stopped she started to walk to class and Conan was about to go up the stairs when someone put an arm around his neck and started choking him.

"You said nothing was going on, you lying bastard!" It was Mitch's voice and Mitch's arm around his neck. Conan started to gag and tried to run away, but Mitch was surprisingly strong.

"Let… go! Let… go… Mitch!"

"You lied to me. I saw you and Amy at the park on Saturday together holding hands and everything. Go to hell Conan!"

Conan elbowed Mitch in the ribs making him let go. Conan started running up the stairs but Mitch grabbed his shirt and yanked Conan back. Mitch started punching Conan and he fought back. People were starting to gather around them chanting "fight, fight, fight." Blood started dripping from Conan's nose and Mitch's mouth. Amy and George pushed their way through the crowd towards the fray.

"Stop it you two," Amy yelled. "Stop it right now!" George got between them and pushed Mitch down while Amy got Conan's arm and dragged him away. Mitch got up and ran towards Conan but George held him back and soon Mitch started fighting with George. "Are you ok," she asked Conan.

"Yeah, I'll be fine."

"Why were you two fighting?"

"Because of you." Amy was stunned. She held him close as a teacher came by to stop George and Mitch. The teacher gave the three guys detention.

-----

In detention Conan, George, and Mitch were sitting apart from one another. The teacher watching them had fallen asleep so Mitch decided to talk things out.

"Why did you lie to me Conan?"

"I didn't, at the time."

"What the hell does that mean?"

"Well, after school that day I asked her out and she said yes."

"You know how I feel about her. Why'd you do that to me?"

"That's what she said," George said suddenly. Conan laughed and then remained silent.

"Shut the hell up George. Who asked you?"

"Your mom!" Before Mitch could make a comeback the bell rang.

"You two retards aren't my friends anymore," said Mitch as he dashed out the door.

"We don't need him anyway," George said to Conan. "It'll just be you, me, and Amy." They walked out of school together and Amy was there waiting for Conan. "I'll leave you two alone," and with that George left. Conan and Amy silently walked home hand in hand.

"I don't want to break up your friendship with Mitch," Amy said to the sighing Conan.

"It's too late. He doesn't want to be my friend, or George's."

"I'll talk to him."

"No, don't. It's ok if he doesn't want to be my friend. It's no big deal."

"Ok Conan."

-----

When Conan got home he heard his parents talking to someone. He entered the house and found Rachel sitting on the couch next to his mother.

"Hello Conan," Rachel said.

"Hi." His father told him to go into the kitchen and he went. Then his father went in too. "Why is Rachel here dad?"

"She said she needed some time away from her father. He's still stunned about Rachel being pregnant. She needs a place to stay, so we decided to let her have the guestroom."

"Oh." Conan looked at Rachel and saw her playing with her beautiful hair.

(It's four years ago and Jimmy's parents just informed Conan of their return to Tokyo.

"I want to move back in with you," he told his dad over the phone.

"Well you can't. You're Conan Edogawa, not Jimmy Kudo. You have different parents now."

"Well, say that Conan's parents are dead and that you'll adopt me."

"That's a good idea. We'll do that."

The next day Jimmy's parents went to the Moore Detective Agency and told Rachel that Conan's parents were dead.

"That's awful," Rachel said. "I guess he can stay here."

"Wait a minute now," Richard Moore suddenly said. "We can't afford to keep him around, and he gets in the way."

"It's ok. We'll adopt him," Jimmy's dad replied. Rachel started at him.

"What about Jimmy?" Jimmy's mother laughed.

"Jimmy's off on a case and who knows when he'll come back. It'll be nice having another kid around. Conan is perfect."

Soon after that Conan got his things to leave. Rachel gave him a big hug and he last saw her playing with her beautiful hair as he left.)

"Conan. Conan! Are you ok with this?"

"What? Yeah, sure."

-----

The months just flew by for Conan Edogawa. At school Mitch ignored him, but he didn't care. Amy and Conan still dated over the summer and had many make out sessions, but at home it was all about Rachel.

Rachel never went back to live where she used to. She would help Conan's mother with the housework, but then her pregnancy started showing. After that Conan wanted to help her with things. She would be sitting on the couch reading and then stand up to get some water, but Conan would offer to get it.

"You don't have to do anything," she would tell him.

"It's no problem," he'd reply then think, 'it's the least I can do after what I've done to you.' Before either of them knew it nine months had gone by.

-----

One day during the summer, before Conan was to enter eighth grade, he and Amy went on another date. They went to eat somewhere, and as they sat Amy wasn't looking at him.

"What's wrong Amy?" He held her hand and she started to get tense.

"You know I love you Conan."

"I love you too."

"I know, and that makes this harder for me." She began to weep. "My family is moving to Nagasaki next week, and we won't be able to see each other anymore." She wiped her eyes with the hand not holding Conan's.

"Why are you moving?"

"My dad got a job offer over there so we're all going. But I don't want to go. I want to stay here with you." The rest of the date was silent after that.

Conan walked her home later, but they went slowly because those few minutes would be the last they would spend together. When they reached her house they kissed longer and more passionately than ever. Amy tried to make it last longer, but Conan drew back after two minutes.

"I don't want to say good-bye," she said.

"Me either." He held her close for awhile. Then he realized that he had to let her go, so he did and left without a second glance.

When he got home his dad was sitting on the couch, instead of Rachel.

"Where's Rachel," Conan asked.

"She's at the hospital, and she had the baby."

"What, really?"

"Yes, it's a girl."……