Summary: Does everyone have a Guardian Angel? If so, who are they? And why do they have one? Because they wish each other dead? Who knows. Written By: Megumi Ohira and Bob Bennit
Part Two: Severus Snape
Severus Snape was a very unhappy person at the moment. Several things had been going wrong. For one, he was sick.
"I am never sick!" Snape groaned, lying on his back in his bed. He had a large box of Kleenex by his bed, and a book in his lap. His head hurt, as if someone were ripping his eyes out.
"Where did this come from? It's horrid!" Snape growled, closing his eyes.
This cold was one of his worst. His nose was runny, his head hurt, his back hurt, all he did was complain, and Granger was teaching the class. What else could go wrong?
The window suddenly blew open, and it got cold. He started to sneeze again, and then he wondered where the window came from. Maybe it was an illusion.
"I wish I was never born!" He said, covering his head with a pillow.
Snape took the pillow off his face, and he was suddenly on his back in a dark room. He realized he wasn't sick…but he knew he was…
Snape got up, and when he did, a bright light came upon him. 'I'm scared.'
'And you should be!' Some hissed...into his head. 'Why did you say those words?'
'Say what words?' Snape asked in his head.
'Never and Born.' The person said unhappily.
There was a flash of light, and Professor McGonagall appeared, with wings. She looked almost like a gothic angel, wearing all black and her hair in a tight bun. "What are you doing Minerva?"
"I'm your Guardian Angel!"
"I have an Angel? Why? I'm like the devil himself."
"No you're not, Severus. You have a heart somewhere in that body." McGonagall said, "Anyway, I'm here to show you what life would be like if you were never born."
"Please spare me Minerva. I'd rather not see how better off everyone's lives are."
"You are a bad boy Severus! You do not talk back to your superiors!"
Fire erupted all around them. Snape became quiet. McGonagall grabbed his arm, and they floated above the ring of fire. She let him dangle just above the fire. "You're not going to drop me are you?"
"If you make me mad enough, Sev-"
Suddenly they stopped, and the room faded from black to white. "We stopped moving Minerva."
"No we haven't! Just wait." She flapped her wings, and they started to fly faster. They came to a black vortex, and it sucked them in.
Snape looked to the left and right. He saw pictures of his child hood. It wasn't very pleasant. He closed his eyes and waited for it all to end. Then suddenly Snape opened his eyes, and there was a bright light. "I dislike this part." McGonagall said.
Everything slowed down. Snape could feel himself spinning. He didn't like it either. Although he liked the heat.
Then…he hit the ground. McGonagall just kind of let go of him. "Welcome to the World Without the Clever Mind of Severus Snape."
Snape looked around. He was horrified.
The grass was the perfect green. The sky was a perfect blue. Just the right color. The clouds were shaped in shapes like flowers and bumblebees. On the corner, Voldemort was selling ice cream to Muggle kids. Everyone was talking or hugging each other. Everyone was wearing either yellow or neon colors. Like neon pink or green. It was scary.
And the sun was smiling.
Really, it was smiling. Like the Wal-Mart smilie face.
"Oh nice to see you again!"
Snape turned around. Right behind him was Neville Longbottom. He was hugging…Draco Malfoy.
"Oh dear Neville! It's a lovely day isn't it? When's your seventh birthday? I'll be sure to come."
"Oh, it's in July!"
"Okay then!"
"All righty then." Neville said. He hugged Draco again, and then he went to Voldemort to get some ice cream for himself and Draco.
"This is too much." Snape said, putting a hand over his eyes and shaking his head.
"You have to see the Trio. Walk with me." McGonagall said. Technically she was floating…but oh well.
They walked through the happy neighborhood, and then they stopped.
"What's that?" Snape asked, pointing to a dark cloud.
"Watch." McGonagall instructed.
Snape did as he was told. And soon he saw what it was. Three six year olds were walking down the street, wearing all black, and engulfed in black aura. They were all frowning. Walking behind them was Lily and James Potter, holding hands and laughing. Mr. and Mrs. Weasley, and the Grangers were all laughing together. It was pretty freaky.
Suddenly, the one that Snape assumed was Harry, walked up to a ginger cat and kicked it. It flew into the air, and far, far away.
"Stupid Crookshanks." The girl who looked like Hermione said.
"Isn't Crookshanks Granger's cat?" Snape asked.
McGonagall just nodded her head. "Watch more."
"I wish everyone would just die! Then the three of us could rule the world…together!" the tall red head shouted.
The three of them started rubbing there hands together, whispering, "Yes."
"I'm scared Minerva." Snape said. "Please don't tell me this is the world without me."
"Oh, look at this Severus." She said.
McGonagall landed on the ground, and walked up to a little girl who was jump roping. "Little girl, your parents are dead."
"Okay!" The girl said, continuing to jump rope.
McGonagall turned back into an Angel and started to float. "This is the world without you Severus. The Trio is evil, Voldemort is selling ice cream on the corner, people don't care…there just happy. AND THE BLOODY SUN IS SMILING!" McGonagall yelled, pointing to the sun. "I swear Severus. You better wish you were alive."
"Oh Son! Harry dear?" James asked joyfully.
"What?"
"Would you and your friends like some ice cream?" Lily asked.
"Sure, whatever Lily." Harry replied.
This was the last straw. He wanted to go kick the demented child. "I WISH I WAS BORN!"
Snape woke up in his bed. It was kind of cold, but there was no window. It was just an illusion.
"Please Merlin, let there be no smiling sun and ice cream selling Voldemort." Snape said. He fluffed his pillow, and lay his head back down. He picked up his book, and started to read.
BB/N: This was fun to type! I wish I updated this story sooner though. It was really funny. "THE BLOODY SUN IS SMILING!" Can you ever see McGonagall say that?
MO/N: I can't believe Neville and Draco were hugging each other, and I helped type it!