Sirius' Choice

Chapter Twelve: The Balance of all Things

Whimsical Firefly

Author's Note: Well, here begins Part Two of Sirius' Choice, now that they're all out of Hogwarts and 'into the real world'. It's been posted un-betaed, so I apologize in advance for any spelling and grammar mistakes.

Disclaimer: Harry Potter and all recognizable characters are property of J.K. Rowling.

- - -

In the beginning there was a balance to all things. Magic and non-magic. Land and ocean. And most importantly, Light and Dark.

However, things change as they are often wont to do. Although for awhile the magic folks and the non-magic folks co-existed peacefully, recognizing that despite their differences they were the same species, eventually things began to go awry. The non-magics felt that there was an imbalance of power, that the magical people were more in control than they were. The magical people began to become superior, treating the non-magics (or 'muggles' as they were referred to in laughing tones) as a sub-class of people.

Thus the balance between the two peoples was destroyed.

War seemed inevitable, between the two. Although the wizards and witches had magic on their side, and considered themselves invincible, even the strongest wizard may be felled by a blade between their ribs. The death of that wizard became the catalyst for the war. In what they thought was righteous indignation for the murder of their greatest leader, the witches and wizards took up arms.

They did not consider the number of 'muggles' that they themselves had murdered. It wasn't important. If they had no magical ability, what use were they to the world? However the magical people were in a quandary as to who their leader ought to be. Just when it seemed that petty squabbles over leadership would break out between the next strongest wizards, someone else came along.

This someone else was a powerful wizard. He wore power and command like a cloak, and immediately the other wizards paid him their respect. The fact that he was so powerful and yet they had never heard of him ought to have rung warning bells in the minds of the people, but strangely it did not.

He called for the extermination of the muggles. He painted a picture of a world made purely of wizards, of harmony and control and peace. It seemed appealing to those of weak minds. Others however began to have second thoughts. They didn't want to kill the muggles, merely teach them a lesson.

At first, the faction that called for the extermination of the muggles were greatly outnumbered by those who did not. However, their numbers began decreasing. Mysterious deaths were reported, and explained away by the muggles getting even. It gave them an even greater reason to kill them all. In time, an entire continent of dissenters was destroyed.

Thus, the balance between the land and the ocean was destroyed, as the sea swallowed the land.

However, eventually the other wizards began to see what was happening and the attack turned inwards. No longer did they care about the one death that the muggles had caused. They cared about the millions of deaths that the powerful wizard had caused. The few who were left made envoys to the muggles. They combined their strength and eventually destroyed what they now realised to be a dark wizard. However, his followers remained. The followers cast an ancient spell on the remains of their leader, and his spirit stayed.

In time the muggle/wizard alliance crumbled once more, for the same reasons as the time before. What neither party knew was that the reaction between the two had been magnified by the spirit of the dark wizard, who's presence was now felt throughout the world like a leaden cloak.

Thus the darkness and light had been placed into constant conflict.

An obliviate charm was placed on all the muggles of the world, and the wizards started their own underground society, away from the muggles eyes. Eventually their secrecy became fanatical, and a ministry was created to ensure that no muggles ever found out about the existence of the wizarding world.

And whilst the world changed, a woman with night-black hair stood and watched through the veil that she was guardian of, and was saddened.

- - -

"Unbelievable!" yelled Sirius, as he entered the flat he was sharing with Remus and James. "Un-bloody-believable!"

"What's got your knickers in a knot, Padfoot?" asked Remus, looking up from the kitchen table with a wry grin.

Sirius collapsed onto the second hand sofa that they had bought and transfigured. "My first day of Auror training, and what do I discover?"

"Since I wasn't there Padfoot, you'll have to tell me," prodded Remus gently.

"Not only have I been placed in the same course as Amanda, James and I have been separated!" said Sirius running a frustrated hand through elegant black hair.

Remus raised an impressed eyebrow. "Amanda got into Auror training, huh? Well, that's not something you hear everyday…"

Sirius watched his friend with narrowed eyes. "You knew, didn't you?"

"I knew that she'd been accepted into Auror training, yes," laughed Remus. "I didn't know that she'd been placed in the same course as you." Pausing to recollect some of the arguments between Sirius and Amanda, he shook his head wryly. "That must be a match made in heaven. Your poor instructors."

Sirius rolled his eyes. "Oh, yes. Poor them, alright. What about poor me? I'm now stuck with the ill-tempered witch until either she drops out or we finish."

"How do you know you won't drop out?" inquired Remus. Sirius merely gave him a grumpy look and he nodded. "You know Sirius, she isn't actually that bad. She's a gorgeous girl, she's easy to get along with…" he paused. "Sometimes I think you simply go out of your way not to get along with her."

Sirius ignored Remus, and got out of his seat. "I'm going to get changed," he said in a grumpy tone.

"Alright then," said Remus in his pleasantest voice, knowing that that would only irritate Sirius further. "Before you go though, would you happen to know the whereabouts of one Mr. Prongs?"

"He said something about Lily. Your guess is as good as mine." With that, Sirius stormed off to his room, leaving a grinning Remus in his wake. Once Sirius was out of the room, however, Remus' face fell.

He turned back to the paper that was spread out in front of him. An entire summer gone by, and he had yet to find a job. He'd had interviews and every single one ended with the interviewer looking through his profile, smiling at his marks, the fact that he was a Gryffindor prefect…

… And the smile vanishing from their face when they saw his werewolf registry paper.

After that, he would either be asked to leave politely, or ordered out the room. The polite ones would either usually tell him that they were unfortunately unable to allow him to work here due to safety reasons, the edgy ones would plaster a fake smile onto their faces and say they'd see what they could do. He never heard back from them.

Running a frustrated hand through his golden-brown hair, he looked at the paper in front of him. He couldn't afford to be fussy about where he worked. He needed the money to pay the rent. Although James and Sirius assured him it didn't matter, it did to him. He knew his parents were glad to see him leave home, although they didn't say it. He knew he would not be welcome back there. He knew he was being a burden here with James and Sirius until he managed to find a job and help with the cost.

He looked at the job that he had circled. Knockturn Alley. I can't be seriously considering working at Knockturn Alley?

But he knew he was past considering it as his hand stretched out to grab the quill and paper of it's own accord. If nothing else, at Knockturn Alley they wouldn't recoil in horror when they found out he was a werewolf.

- - -

Sirius lay flat on the double bed in his room, his black hair forming a shadowy halo around his head.

He had used to share this bed with Edana. She had moved in with him when he had bought the flat half-way through their seventh year. He had wanted her to.

He'd spent the summer happy and lively around his friends, doing all the usual 'Sirius-y things' as Lily had termed it. It was only when he was alone that his thoughts turned inevitably to Edana.

In his mind he could see all his memories of Edana running through his head, her smiling, laughing, concentrating intensely as she played Quidditch, crying, the look of fear as she saw the Death Eater's curse flung towards her, the intent look on her face as she studied for potions, her as she walked through Hogsmeade with him.

Then his thoughts came to the day she died, as they always did. The expression on her face, the bruises and cuts that covered her visible flesh.

A shudder wracked his body, and without realizing, Sirius curled up in foetal position. He refused to cry over Edana. He refused. She was a traitor, a betrayor, she wasn't worthy of anything.

Least of all for him to go and cry over her.

Think of something else, dammit he ordered himself. The first image that popped into his brain was Amanda. Sirius growled. Something else then, he ordered his brain.

After that, his mind remained mercifully empty.

- - -

It was an innocuous flat, pale cream walls and a burnished metal banister that trailed around the stairs.

James ran his hand along the railings as he walked. It was a muggle area, and he hoped that he was blending into the scenery enough. He'd changed out of his robes and was now wearing pale grey trousers and a black cable-knit jumper that Lily had given him for Christmas when they were in school.

As he walked up the stairs towards Lily's apartment he anxiously examined the flowers in his hand. They were a pale delicate pink… Lily liked pink, didn't she? He exhaled a nervous breath, and loosened his grip on the flowers so that he didn't kill them.

It was strange, Lily had been avoiding him since they graduated, and he was rather uncertain as to why. She'd see him, but she was… distant. She didn't want to spend excess time around him and she seemed sad all the time.

And he didn't know what he'd done, or why she was acting that way. It was only recently that he'd thought the reason for it might be because she didn't want to see him anymore, but she didn't know how to break it to him.

So, his task today was to a) find out what was bothering her. There were two part b's depending on what part a revealed. The first part b) involved him getting on the ground and apologizing profusely. The second part b) involved him hunting down whoever and whatever had made Lily unhappy and causing them great pain.

But first he had to get her alone long enough to talk to her. That part could be slightly difficult, given that she had been avoiding him lately. He stood at the door which displayed the lettering '4A' on it's side. Lily's flat.

Ignoring the quickening of his heartbeat he knocked on the door twice. And waited. Lily's voice rang out to say that she'd be there in a moment, and James shifted his weight nervously from foot to foot.

A moment later a flushed looking Lily opened the door, and stopped as she saw him standing there. James swallowed nervously, and proffered the flowers to Lily, who wordlessly took them from his hand.

"I should go and put these in a vase," she said softly, turning abruptly from the doorway and walking inside the flat. After a moment's debate, James followed her inside, through the living room and into the kitchen. Settling himself at the side bench he watched the graceful arc of her neck as she turned her head, the casual efficiency that she used as she set the flowers up.

Eventually, she turned and looked at him. "Thankyou," she said with slightly shadowed eyes. James nodded slowly, wondering why it was so tense in the room.

Lily once again, turned away from him and began walking back towards the living room. Muttering an oath under his breath, James followed. "Lily, why are you doing this?"

"Doing what?" she asked with false cheer.

James gestured helplessly. "This".

Lily's face remained emotionless, and James ran a frustrated hand through his hair. "You've been avoiding me ever since school finished, and you know it." Lily's face stayed blank, but her eyes flashed briefly with some hidden emotion, and James continued on. "I don't know if it's anything to do with me, but in case it was, I came here to apologize. That's why I bought the flowers."

James waited patiently for Lily to answer, and yet received no sign, no hint of how she was feeling. Finally, he looked away. "I guess I was just wasting my time, then."

He turned and walked towards the door. "I can see myself out, thanks."

Once again, he received no response from Lily, and feeling close to tears, James left apartment 4A.

- - -

Just a few more strands… Another eight strands and the bonds will have been broken. Seven and a half…

James Milton's brow remained furrowed and sweat-streaked as he attempted to break the last remaining magical bonds in the ropes. He hadn't expected it to be anywhere near as tricky as it was. He had expected to have left the girl in a week at the outside, and yet, here he was two months later, still finishing up with breaking the bonds.

It was times like these that he wondered what had possessed the girl to choose such strong magical bonds. How had she known?

The answer was, of course, that she hadn't. Sheer luck had been on her side and it had served her well.

Seven…Almost there, just a little bit more old chap. Six. Soon, soon. Six and a half…

Once he was out of there, though… what would he do? One half of him replied defiantly that it would be leaving, back to the life it had led, back to challenges and conquests and danger.

Another voice however, whispered in the back of his mind that the girl…he still didn't know her name. That voice whispered that she was vulnerable, and that she needed help. It said that because he had caused her problems, he should at least attempt to solve them.

Strangely enough, James found himself torn between the two. In the darkness, he was easily able to recall the way her blonde hair formed a fine mist on the pillow as she slept. Images of her blue eyes flashing with anger and something else as she spoke seemed etched onto his eyelids.

Five. The count down is now well and truly on. Four, three…Ha! It's getting easier.

Choose. He had to make a choice, so that once the bonds were broken he could either slip out of the apartment, or whether his hands remained bound with the unmagicked ropes.

Two. Oh, so close…One.

James sat and looked at his bound hands. The ropes stayed tied. He looked up across the room to where the girl was lying down, fine hair obscuring her face.

So. This is what you're choosing between is it? Freedom, and a girl who's name you still don't know after how many months? A girl who can't stand to look at you, not that you'd want her looking at you. A girl who calls you murderer in a venomous voice. A girl without magic who goes out of her way to be unpleasant.

You're stuck trying to choose between this and freedom?

James closed his eyes, resigned to that way his thought process had gone.

The ropes slipped off his hands.

James Milton turned towards the door and exited the building without a backwards glance towards the sleeping woman.

- - -

Sirius Black, alias James Evans, set the bar up on automatic pilot. He had worked here for so long now that he could do it half asleep. All the different glasses, all the different liquors and drink, he now knew from memory.

Mother would be so proud…

As always, his mind was focused on Dumbledore. Dumbledore and that remarkable conversation he had had, so many weeks ago.

The conversation had been simple, short – Dumbledore had expected nothing more of him than that he listen. And he had. Dumbledore needed to know how it would end, or if it would end, and what he had meant last time they had spoken.

Sirius had shook his head sickly, and Dumbledore had simply nodded. After that he had advised Sirius to think about it and exited the room.

And now, however many weeks later, he was still torn. What could he say? That in the future he was an escaped convict charged with the murder of his best friend and his best friends' wife, murdering a large number of muggles with a single curse, except he had been innocent, it had been another close friend who had done it, instead?

What would be changed if he mentioned the outcome of that fateful night when Voldemort turned up to Godric's Hollow? Would it change for better or for worse?

And really in the long run, if it meant that James and Lily remained alive…Did he care?

With a set expression, Sirius charmed the remainder of the glasses into their correct positions, the chairs off the tables and onto the floor, and the dishcloth to wipe all the tables down.

The sign at the door remained on 'Closed', as he reached for parchment and quills.

So…what would I change?

- - -

Remus felt his sweaty palms slide past each other, and then nervously clasped them together, as the warlock in front of him flicked through his profile. He was an ugly fellow, thought Remus clinically. The nose was disfigured, broken at least twice if not more, and healed awkwardly. The man slipped a tounge between his teeth, and Remus caught a glimpse of yellowing teeth, arranged higgeldy-piggeldy. Bloodshot black eyes were as hard as diamonds as he read.

Remus inhaled nervously, and wished he hadn't. He could smell potions, sweat, alcohol and waste, with the overlying scent of decaying flesh. Remus found himself continuously fighting the urge to gag.

Through the window he could see evidence of shady business deals, as people pulled things out from under coats, only to hide them again. On the way in, he had even passed a Polyjuice Brothel, and after pausing briefly in front of it, decided that he didn't want to know.

He was most certainly in Knockturn Alley.

Finally, the man in front of him looked up, and Remus struggled to maintain a pleasant face and keep eye contact with those cold black eyes.

"So," says the man slowly, his voice sounding like gravel slipping over oil. "A Gryffindor prefect. And a werewolf."

A predatory grin was beginning to show, and Remus was beginning to feel slightly anxious. Thoughts like 'Maybe this was a bad idea…No, screw that, I know it was a bad idea' began to circulate through his head.

The man continued on, his diamond hard eyes never leaving Remus' face. "I see no reason for you not to work here, in fact…" his eyes raked over Remus' long body. "In fact, I'm sure that your appearance here will raise the clientele numbers."

Remus resisted the urge to swallow. He knew what he was getting himself in for. He had known when he applied. They didn't care that he was a werewolf, it was all he was good for at the moment. After a few brief moments had passed, Remus' golden eyes looked firmly into his employers. "In that case, when do I start?"

- - -

Author's Note: Heh… Holidays, what can I say? Sorry guys… I hope you're all having a fantastic break (and that Santa brought you lots of awesome goodies.) This is my (belated) Christmas present to all of you, so if anyone wants to be nice and review as a Christmas present back…

Anyway – Review Replys!!

Heart of the Phoenix: Well, hello! I did wonder where you had disappeared to… Thanks for the encouraging words, there'll probably be some more around the New Year!

Lady of the Dragons2: All I'm going to say is that you were on the right track in your last review ;) How'd you go on your exams?

Sweet 16 Movie Buff: Rule number one: you never apologize for a perfectly good review that the writer loves reading! So… Amanda and Sirius is a bit of a mixed bag. Whilst he might like her, Sirius might not be too keen on another relationship. That, and they already have a bit of a history together.

Blueslusher48: Lol, glad that you're enjoying this so far. I thought about just making it a normal MWPP fic, but then I did it this way and it feels a bit more realistic. If they were in the middle of a war that constantly had attacks and people dying, I don't really think that they'd be all that carefree by seventh year.

jwhit-moony: 'Snaaape, Snaaape, oh it's a Snape…'

Thanks to my other reviewers random kitty, aigeanta meidhir, and Novemberkind.

Please review and let me know how this is all going – Thankyou!