Chapter 9

For the rest of the day, Harry did stay at the Ministry building to watch his friends get their apperation licenses. He was somewhat surprised by the steady pace which the Ministry was recuperating at. The workers went back to their normal routine, aurors came and went, notices were put up, the rooms were cleaned, and the fallen were mourned.

"Just like it was eighteen years ago," Harry heard one of the guards say. Harry bid his friends good-bye once they finished and teleported to The Hideaway, wondering if Sirius was alright.

He went to the Infirmary first, but, thankfully, no one was in there; so then he went to the main living room on the first floor. His godfather was sitting at a table across from Splikvin, with Remus next to him. There was a document of some sort in front of them.

Harry was to far away from them to hear what Sirius said, but he did see Splikvin's jaw drop. "Tell me you're kidding," she groaned.

Sirius shook his head. "Nope."

"Did you know?" Moony asked. "After all, you were her closest friend."

Splikvin fingered the bridge of her nose, thinking. "I remember Lily mentioning it in a letter she sent my muggle post, when she first found out she was having a kid but…I didn't think she was serious about it."

"Serious about what?" Harry asked, making his presence known.

"Never mind-" Splikvin began.

"You've got another godparent." Remus said with a crooked grin.

Now it was Harry's turn to have his jaw drop. He looked at Splikvin, "Is it you?"

"I told you it was a bad idea to tell him," she muttered, glaring at Remus, who was undaunted.

"But…does that make Snape my god-uncle?" Harry asked in a strained voice.

Remus laughed, seeing the horrified look on Harry's face. "No—no it doesn't."

"Don't worry Tallon," Sirius added, "We wouldn't dream of torturing you like that." Then a sly look entered his eyes and an evil grin appeared on his face. "You know Sel, I'm Harry's godfather, and you're his godmother-"his voice was cut off as Splikvin flicked her wand at him.

"Not another word," she warned, "or you won't utter another. And could you please stop using that ridiculous nickname?"

Remus grinned at gave Sirius his voice back." Why?" Sirius asked, "It suits you."

She glared. "It would suit a Hufflepuff three-year old better than me. Or would you like me to call you Siri again?" Remus and Harry laughed while Padfoot returned her scowl. "There's also-"

"Fine," Sirius interrupted, "I get the point."

"So Padfoot, what happened in the Ministry building?" Harry asked, "Did you get hit by something?"

Sirius shook his head, "Not really. I felt something pull at me almost-" he frowned.

"Almost?" Harry prodded.

"Almost like I was coming out of the veil again." He finished. There was silence.

"Maybe Voldemort has brought someone else out?" Remus suggested quietly.

"Maybe," Sirius agreed. "But I got a bad feeling this time- I don't think this person is on our side."

"Then let's hope no more come through," Splikvin said, "And hope you're wrong about this one."

Harry's dreams that night were filled with memories. Memories of each time he'd seen Voldemort; memories of each time he'd been posses; memories of each time someone got hurt because of him.

He jolted into wakefulness, breathing harshly and a single question running through his mind: why couldn't he keep Voldemort from taking over?

Getting out of bed, he saw that it was around four in the morning. Harry got dressed, knowing that he wouldn't be able to sleep any longer, and decided to go for a walk. He stuck his head out the window, and warm, muggy air greeted him. Where could he go that was cooler? He decided that the lake near Headquarters might be, and teleported there.

He didn't go inside the castle, but walked at a steady pace away from it. The grass was still green, untouched by the withering affects of usual summers. A few clouds drifted lazily, calmly, yet serenely through the indigo sky where only the brightest of stars still gleamed. Cool breezes swept past him, bringing with them the smells of pine trees and dew. The atmosphere had a relaxing effect on Harry as he walked.

Upon reaching a rather large pond, Harry sat down on a boulder. A rustle of cloth alerted him that someone else was also there. Curious, Harry changed his eyes to a werewolf's so that he could see better in the still-dark area. A little ways away, Snape was sitting on the ground, his back against a tree, staring out across the across, seemingly lost in thought.

Harry let him be, and also began to think. How did Voldemort take over hi8m? Why could he only block some visions? What if it happened at a crucial moment? During a fight or something? Was it worth the risk?

Was there something he'd done wrong? Or something he hadn't done? Or did he not want to be free of Voldemort's possession enough? Could that be the problem—will? How many more people would get hurt if he was possessed again? Why weren't his current Occlumency abilities enough?

"What are you doing here Potter?"

Harry jerked out of his daze and found Snape standing a few feet away, the barest hints of sunlight already crested the horizon.

"Thinking Sir." He replied, then added, "About Occlumency." He could tell that the potions master was barely suppressing a sneer.

"I though you didn't need to think of it any longer," Snape remarked with the smallest hints of a taunt.

"You always have to think about it to do it," Harry replied evenly, "But-" he trailed off, not sure he wanted to voice his thoughts to Snape, of all people.

"But?"

"I think I'm doing something wrong." Clearly, whatever Snape had been expecting him to say wasn't that. "See, I can keep other people out, like Dumbledore, he tried last summer. And I can keep Vol- er, his emotions out of my head. But I—I just can't stop all the visions, or whenever he tries to take over. I don't understand why."

Snape looked at him. "That is because you did not study the correct form of Occlumency."

"Correct form, Sir?" Harry repeated.

"There are two ways of using Legilimency, so there are two forms of using Occlumency. The first, is the type which you learned, the less difficult form. It organizes the mind, cuts it off from others who are trying to see if you are lying, telling the truth, or if they want to know a specific memory of yours.

"The second why of using both Legilimency and Occlumency is by using sheer force. There is no simple way of doing it. No short cuts; it must be learned via trial and error. It is the form which the Dark Lord uses most often, and the form which I was assigned to teach you if your fifth year.

"It is because of fore that the Dark Lord is able to overcome your mind, and it is because of force that you can see the Dark Lord's current—activities. Unless you learn this form, he will continue to be able to take over."

Harry was silent, digesting all that Snape had just told him. It really would never end. Not unless… "Sir, will you teach me again?" he asked.

Snape was visibly startled for a brief moment. "Why should I?" he asked gruffly, "It was because of you the lessons ended?"

Harry looked at his professor squarely in the eye. "And it was because of me Sirius died later. I can't afford a distraction like him taking over in this war. I can't afford to have something like that happen while I'm fighting."

"Everyone is fighting in this war Potter," Snape reminded him scornfully, "No one wants distractions, and many cannot afford them as well."

"But everyone doesn't have to kill Voldemort," Harry replied quietly, lowering his gaze.

Snape froze. "What?"

Harry's shoulders slumped. "You know about the prophecy, right?"

"Only that there is one concerning you and the Dark Lord."

He exhaled heavily. " 'The one with the power to vanquish the Dark Lord approaches, born to those who have thrice defied him, born as the seventh month dies." The words came tumbling out of Harry's mouth, clear, carrying a growing sense of dread the closer they came to the end. " 'And the Dark Lord will mark him as his equal, but he will have a power the Dark Lord knows not." Harry finished the prophecy in a quiet, bitter voice. " 'And either must die at the hand of the other, for neither can live while the other survives.'"

It was somewhat of a relief to finally tell someone else, even if it was someone who didn't like him…

"Who else knows?" Snape asked finally after a few long minutes of silence.

"Professor Dumbledore," Harry answered numbly.

"And?"

"Me, and you, Sir."

"What about Black?" Snape asked in disbelief, "And Lupin?"

"They don't know," Harry answered, looking at the stone beneath him. "No one else knows. Not the Order, not the Weasleys, not Hermione…no one."

"Why?"

"Like you said Sir, no one can afford to be distracted. I know Sirius and Remus would worry, and Mrs. Weasley might go ballistic." Snape emitted something that could almost be considered a chuckle. Harry went on, "They shouldn't waste their time thinking about something they can't do a thing about; that's just…pointless."

Snape was silent once more, arms crossed while he thought. He paced for a few moments, "Merlin knows why I'm doing this…" he muttered, then turned to Harry. "I will continue your lessons tomorrow Potter," he said, "However, know that you must respect my privacy or I swear you will have things worse than detentions to worry about."

Harry nodded. "Yes Sir." But I already do… he thought.

It was now around noon, and Harry went to Diagon Alley to visit Alex. She wasn't in the store, but Mr. Blurnof was able to tell Harry that she'd gone to a park in London. Harry thanked the very tall, very muscular, and very intimidating man, and went on his way to the park.

He checked three parks before he found the right one. Alex was seated with her backs towards him on a bench, viewing the calm lake. Her hair was pulled back into a ponytail and dressed in jeans and a white shirt; Harry smiled when he saw the bracelet on her wrist as she tucked a lock of hair behind her ear.

Silently, Harry crept over and covered her eyes from behind as he kissed her cheek. She nearly screeched, but once she tugged his hands away, she smiled, "Don't do that." She scolded as he sat down beside her, then kissed him back.

Harry felt all the anxiety and dread he'd been feeling over the past week melt away as she did. He put an arm around her, holding her closer until a raven cawed nearby, startling them both out of their short bliss.

Harry scowled at the bird and sent a gust of wind at it, causing the bird to tumble away head-over-talons and Alex to laugh. She laid her head on his shoulder and they watched the other, less annoying birds float on the water or gracefully fly above it. This is what it meant to live, Harry decided. He wanted his life to be like this; calm, gentle, peaceful, and with Alex. But as long as Voldemort survived, it wouldn't be like that. Maybe that was what the prophecy meant. That neither of them would enjoy, if that was the word in Voldemort's case, life until the other no longer survived it. There would be no peace, no calm, no rest, until one of them was gone—dead.

He drew his thoughts and attention to Alex, who was talking softly to him. "I've finished the brooms, all of them. Mr. Blurnof is getting help from a fried at Quality Quidditch Supplies to put them on the market. I've decided against opening it majorly, so people have to look for them on their own, you know?" She smiled at him, "And the deal's off, by the way. Not that you've written me many statements…"

Harry chuckled, "And seeing you every day and telling you in person doesn't make up for that?"

"Of course it doesn't," she said mockingly, they both laughed.

Smiling, Harry gently kissed the top of her head, he wanted to have more moments like this, lots more. But Voldemort stood in the way, and Harry decided he wasn't going to allow that for much longer.

Coming Up:

Occlumency

Lessons

Then:

Gringotts